21, on apprenticeship. Mum wants half my wage each week.

[Helloworld469]

So im a 21 years old female, i get apprenticeship wage (dog grooming) 5 days a week which is not much. I clean up in the house, i wash everyones clothes, i cook for everyone when mum says she wont which is often. I HAVE to make everyones breakfast before work ( have to be in work for 8:50am.) I come home to cook my brothers teas and feed the pets take them out and do most things. My mum says i do not do nothing. I dont help with cost for food or anything even tho my half i do mostly spend on my brothers and not me. I give my mum 100 each week and i get 100. My mum says i should be paying her more so i should only get round 50 pound towards myself. Is this right or should i pay her more? I dont go out either and i dont socialise so im asking for advice.

50% is plenty OP. I’m sorry your mum is treating you like this. How old are your siblings. Are they old enough that you can teach them to sort their own breakfast or tea? Not that you should have to, I’m just thinking of practical things. Is there another adult you can trust to talk to in real life?

It sounds like you're being exploited by your employer. Find another job - you could be getting £11 an hour. Then you can afford a room in a house share.

Your mum is a lazy selfish person. Sorry

Noppe only me. No other family i know or who would tell my mum what im saying tbh

Get yourself onto a proper certified apprenticeship which will lead to a higher salary.

https://www.ucas.com/apprenticeships/england/higher-level-4-5

You're 21.

Could you move out into a shared house in which circumstance Universal Credit might top up your wages?

Your mum is using you as a cash cow and she knows she can as its too expensive for you to get your own place on an apprenticeship wage. I think you have no choice but to stick this out until you can get a job that pays enough for you to do a house share. I used to pay £200 to my parents when I was owning about £800 a month.

Ages 13 and 6. The 13 yr old only a few days ago started but its hard because he has chronic adhd and ver aggressive lil brother lol.

@Helloworld469 if you went to Pets at Home's Groom Room, the trainee groomers start on £11.44 per hour.

Your mum is being unreasonable, but you could also be earning more while you train.

Im not sure. Im not told anything so im absolutely clueless to what im entitled to or whatever i need to do (which makes my situation worse)

Thanks ill look into it

Wow thats a lot. What job do u do? And thx for replying

You need to really switch on your brain and do everything you can to become independent as soon as possible. Be that lying about your wages, saving some in a secret account, getting another job she knows nothing about, whatever. But you need to work towards getting out and living your own live. Good luck, you've got this!

Dog grooming is a perfectly respectable apprenticeship.
Are there cultural things at play here expecting eldest child to do so much?
She will have lost child benefit, so does the family need the money?

Op, you're an adult now and responsible for advocating for yourself. You're well old enough to figure out how to find the resources to help you.

I believe your mother is banking on you staying ignorant and to remain under her control. If you want your life to head in a different direction, you have to make this happen.

Not told anything by who? You’re an adult. No one is going to tell you. We are trying to help but you’re ignoring questions.

Are you in a proper apprenticeship whilst in education? Or are you just working for some random who is paying less than minimum wage whilst calling it an apprenticeship?

You need to be on a proper apprenticeship alongside education or you need to quit this and get a proper job.

Yep its the proper thing its with collage of animal welfare (caw) i cant because i work from 9am to 5:30pm and sometimes we go over and get out at 6 or 7.

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/benefits/

https://centrepoint.org.uk/do-you-need-help/housing-advice-and-services

Centrepoint provides information regarding accommodation and support for young people. Get in contact with them as your housing situation isn't stable.

@Helloworld469 you can use a tool like turn2us or entitled to to get an idea of what help you'd get if you struck out on your own.

The Help to Claim service provided by Citizens Advice is another possibility for help.

You're 21 years old, you need to look these things up yourself and get yourself sorted. Get a proper job, you could be an actual dog groomer earning minimum wage or more, get a house share and move out.

Are you studying at a college? They should be able to advise you. If not, go to Citizen's Advice, use Entitled To to see what benefits you could get, and look up house shares in your area to see what's available.

And remember that after a year your wage goes up to national minimum wage.

Monday through Friday? If so, you should have a weekend job.

You need to move out as soon as possible.
Under totally different circumstances, some twenty years ago I was in a position similar to yours.
NC with my remaining emotionally abusive parent.

So its work everyday asides Wednesdays. Then Wednesday i do a 4 hour lesson from 1 -4 pm with is training. Im trying not to ignore questions im just trying to type not to fast or too much at 1 time. without my mum having a look at my phone or asking who im texting or talking to till she sees the screen. So sorry if im missing anything. I know im an adult but i wasn't really guided on what i have to set up. I had to have a provided social worker get me a bank account at the age of 19 :/
So sorry ^^
And when this is finished i get the above minimum wage. But thats in like a year.