Remember remember it's frugal November

[LonelyOversharer]

Woo hoo! I've never done the new thread before!

Hi, still alive - just

£200?! Why two musicals not one? Blimey 😱

That’s so much money girlie for a non-residential type trip. I guess they think money grows on trees?

snuggly that is a good plan to take it in turns to visit parents and give each other a break. A bit of peace and quiet is very sanity restoring!

Ah yes, laska you did mention the potential redundancy I completely forgot. Shame you have to hang on but at least you have a new end date in sight

That's what I was thinking. I think two musicals would be too much for me in one go.

There might be a fund for parents who can't afford it £200 for a school trip.

Does she get dinner & a bottle of wine too for that much?.

More arse holes? life

Hello to the newbies (is that 3 today?! Must be a record!) and especially Mo as I have a baby the same age -DC2 for me though.

All this talk of Cambridge is making me fancy a day out there. It's not far from here and very lovely. Oxford is still nicer though imho

Gawd Snuggly you definitely need a break! I feel a bit like that too - a day at home on my own would be indescribable bliss!

LLL I too think you are doing brilliantly. I've done what you do (ft work, commute) with just one DC and that felt like very hard work - I was always chasing my tail. And yy to spending hours picking things up - I hate it! If you both work and commute then I think a cleaner is a justifiable expense if you can afford it!

Love the sofa Laska, especially the colour.

I was very organised and booked my Christmas Ocado delivery last month, but we've now agreed to go to PILs for a couple of days so I can cancel it (it's all fancy gin at the moment to meet the minimum spend - hope I don't forget ). Anyway,not hosting Christmas will save us a fortune. I still have to host a meal with my family but that's only one meal. Because I am trying to lose weight I might avoid getting any Christmas extras in - that way I'll only indulge for a couple of days. I've started present shopping and DC are sorted but no one else - argh! It's not even the money that's the main problem, its ideas. Though I have found something my sisters would love but it's more than I wanted to spend. Hmm. I'll probably go for it as they are brilliant aunties and one in particular babysits for us for free as much as we like to ask (we don't take the mick as she works ft and isn't round the corner but it's so good to have her - especially as we can't leave DS with just any babysitter). I love my sisters, I'm very lucky to have them I'd never tell them that though. We mostly show affection by insulting one another

House is a tip as DD is still very needy and I haven't got anything done today. Once I get her to sleep I am spending the evening tidying up. Fun Friday night here!

@Love hope your dad has calmed down now and you can enjoy your evening.

@Girlie blimey that’s steep for a school trip, I’d be wanting them to be going away for a night or 2 for that!

I have stupidly agreed for DS1 to have a couple of friends over for a sleepover. To be fair, they’re good kids and no bother. They’ve had tea so not got to feed them and have promised to stay in the conservatory on the PS4 and their various phones tablets etc. One lad has his dads iPad with him, which has the new It film downloaded on it (With the dads permission of course). Might be brave and watch it with them later when DS1 has gone to bed. Then again....🙈 I’m a bit of a wuss!

Dad?

Dd!

Sorry should have said it is an overnight trip and it includes dinner and a pack lunch on the second day, even so....!!

Dd keen to go as apparently all her friends are going I don't think I'm poor enough for a discount Fluffy but will talk to the school about paying it off a bit more slowly.

Hi newbies

Wreck please will you pm me your Lapland details. I don't want to stalk you obv but there are so many companies or there. If you don't want to fine too

Cross-posted with Girlie

First, two musicals? Seems a lot and that's a lot of money too. Bit harsh that the school puts parents in this position I think, although I appreciate they are trying to offer good experiences. Tricky.

And yes to after school meltdowns, I sympathise! DS has a bit of one every afternoon on the way home. Usually over some invisibly small trigger but it's stress really. I think it is really common, SN or not. TBH it would be much much easier for me if I drove him home as I wouldn't have to suffer the public reaction to his after-school behaviour, or the occasional risk of him trying to bolt. I think all the other school parents have clocked us now (whether they realise DS has SN or just think he is badly behaved, I'm not sure). However, in spite of the difficulties, scooting home actually helps with the de-stressing a lot so we do it to reduce his stress levels (at the expense of mine though!) .

Yesterday was quite epic as it started with ds refusing to leave the classroom when I turned up. And went downhill from there. He was genuinely devastated at something that he perceived to be a change of routine and thought I had come to take him home early. I had both Reception teachers and two TAs hovering and looking a bit helpless at his full-on meltdown in the playground. And a large parent audience. Poor DS though 🙁. Tonight was marginally better but I am still looking forward to a G&T in a bit! Hurrah for weekends!

Ok will do!

Thanks

Too many demands on my work time and not enough hours in the day

Christmas I'm sorry to hear that that was hard.

We have a few folks with similar struggles in our school and most of us have nothing but sympathy for them. The only exception I know is where there are parents whose children also have SN that make them particularly vulnerable and those parents can be afraid for their children, when there are other kids around that can become a bit tense.

For example one family I know have a kid with brittle bones and in his class there are an ADHD kid and one with ASD who is volatile. I think there can be some friction in that situation, especially if the parents of the vulnerable kids are carrying hurt from similar stuff in their own childhoods.

One family I know started reception by asking the school to circulate a full A4 pdf explaining their kid's situation to the whole school. It certainly helped us all to understand and do what was needed. We are in a very small school where everyone know everyone else and that helps too. Having an understanding of the problem really helps as we can all sympathise and even try to help, if we think that help will be well received.

I'm sorry to hear that things are tricky. I'm sure the parents around your were all feeling so badly for you. I bet they'd love to help.

Thanks Sunny that was a lovely post and much appreciated.

I am open with people that DS has ASD (when I speak to someone) but I don't wear a badge! Most people are kind so far. It's not a tiny school but small for London - 2 form entry.

I don't think anyone is worried about DS's impact on their child - he is mostly rather withdrawn. And has 1:1 resource for his classroom needs (although I am not sure other parents realise that). He just gets upset when there is a change to what he understands or expects. Otherwise he is very quiet and compliant at school, and just saves his stress for me!

Anyway, we have a meeting with school next week to take stock of how things are going. I'll be interested in their views. I am not yet sure mainstream is the best place for him but we will see.

I am enjoying my

Happy weekend everyone 🍷 it's been a long old week.

Meadow sorry you are still so poorly. Fingers crossed you make a swift recovery

Sunny I'm quite jealous that you live in Cambridge. I used to live in Oxford and just miss that historic city feel so much. Have a great trip there need.

Girlie good plan to ask if you can spread the payment.

For whoever asked....steak! I had steak rarey rare rare steak with chippies pepper sauce squeaky beans and a bottle of Malbec. And a g&t. And dh and I shred Eton mess.

I’m a bit tipsy drunk now. Hurrah.

Went to Tesco tonight with a friend to pick up noodles for dp. Came out £40 lighter but that did include milk for the baby and a secret Santa gift. Frugal win was the pasta a needed being reduced to clear for 20p so I stocked up!

Sorry to hear the sickness is continuing badly @Meadow. I had morning (more like evening) sickness with my little one but luckily it only lasted until about 14 weeks and was no where near as bad as yours sounds

How exciting to have a baby buddy @ChristmasSeacow

Actual sleep happened in this house last night! Feel like a new person!

Spent £3.22 on breakfast yesterday (Friday treat) and 99p on a 12m roll of Aldi wrapping paper (have used it for a couple of years - good quality and has cutting squares)

Away overnight visiting friends so some anticipated spends. Have budgeted £50 for the weekend so let’s see how that goes!

Urrrgh, I’ve been waking up for quite a while with a runny nose and sneezing but the last couple of days it’s been really heavy runny nose. I figured it was a dust allergy so had a major clean in the room last week. Do you think there is any point buying anti allergy duvet etc without replacing the mattress first? Thing is the mattress is about 10 years old and does need replacing soon but a new duvet is cheaper! I will give the mattress a vacuum later. Used the same washing powder for years

£29 on three hours of cleaning sounds like a frugal win to me lilly . How did the cleaning up after yourselves chat go? You do sound very time poor with work/family so could you have a cleaner more often? Tidying up is so time consuming

Glad you had a nice meal em . Hope DS enjoyed his time with Grandparents and all three want to do it again soon

Thanks for the new thread Lonely. Quick post before I get on with packing and loading the car at the end of a really fabulous week away. West Cornwall has been idyllic, we have been so lucky, not a drop of rain, so we've been on the beach every day, long walks (to much joy from the dc!) and just generally relaxing. I think I'm all board gamed out now as we played games every night, great to have some time like that with the dc.
We've been reasonably frugal but need to get properly back on that frugal wagon now!
I lost track of the last thread but will keep up with this one and reply properly later on.

Love We get that too. I do a major clean every week in the bedroom and change the covers. It's odd that doing that isn't solving the problem. I'm not sure whether replacing the mattress will help. Maybe? Perhaps as a test you could get one of those mattress toppers or a waterproof sheet and put it on top to see if that alters things.

girlie I would also be careful of the ‘all my friends are going’ line too! It’s fairly common for the school to allow monthly payments for larger sums. Usually that’s holiday type things here. Do they use a parental payment platform?

sunny thank you again. I was really up for the walking idea as we would have enough time. I seem to have brought the Yorkshire weather with me though, I’m sure you once said it hardly ever rains here. We obviously don’t have the kit to have a soggy 45 walk. I think it’s not due to stop until after lunch.

seacow, the actual course DD is looking at is at Oxford if that eases the pain? Well, one of them anyway, she’s only just started 6th form and has a list of courses, open days and grade requirements already....