Marvellous Frugaleers - Chatting and saving through November, and into December.

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Just setting up the new thread for the chatty Frugaleers.

By popular request - copied from an old thread

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/other_subjects/1324074-For-those-who-cant-afford-to-use-central-heating-this-year-How-are-you-going-to-cope

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/credit_crunch/1543785-your-top-tips-for-money-saving-and-a-more-frugal-life

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/credit_crunch/1600030-Small-money-saving-habits-petty-even

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/credit_crunch/1628874-Gas-Elec-Bills-monthly-and-SKY-so-angry

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1911061-NO-MORE-COLD-MUMSNETTERS

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2209167-Slow-Cookers-are-shit

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2224969-saving-money

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2258202-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-6-start-the-new-year-with-a-clear-purpose-and-keep-moving-forwards-even-by-tiny-steps?

orchard.tesco.com/ Sign up to this.

www.topcashback.co.uk/home And this.

www.quidco.com/home/ And this

www.moneysavingexpert.com/ And this

www.moneysavingexpert.com/cheapenergyclub ditto.

www.checkoutsmart.com/ Plus this.

www.hotukdeals.com/all/deals/new?page=3 Check this daily.

I phoned the council but they don't do housing appointments just a drop in which isn't ideal but oh well. I said we needed to discuss our housing situation and she asked are you going to be made homeless, which makes me wonder if that's the only thing they will listen to?! I just said that there are various issues we need to discuss.

Well Cag, if you can't afford the rent then yes, you will be made homeless.

I need a glue gun. Any recommendations?

Also, if you were a lovely, lovely nurse, early forties, with a cute little dog would you be happy with this as a token gift from me?!

Well if it gets you a house, I'd keep quiet about your parents being willing to pay the rent shortfall.

Agree with fluffy. Don't lie. But maybe don't mention help from parents. If they say can you afford it the answer is no.

That's what I was thinking, WE can't afford it, that is true, I don't know if they can dispute that? The Caglets have their clubs etc but TBH most of that is paid for with birthday/Christmas money anyway from my parents/grandma

In any case the help with the shortfall (it's a 12.5% increase by the way) is not a permanent thing anyway

I need to list all the issues I guess.

So:
Rent increase of 12.5%, can't afford it
Can't afford anything even as big as our tiny house as the market rate is way above what we pay now
Kids are still sharing a tiny room at 9/7 and it is a massive problem as they are both likely autistic (I have proof they've been referred for assessment) and one DOESN'T FECKING SLEEP
I can't always manage stairs and we only have an upstairs loo

Stuff to ask:
Clarify rules on different sexes sharing bedroom
Does HB increase with rent (pretty sure that's a no)
What happens if we can only afford to move out of town, will this mean we lose our place on the housing register

Anything else?

Oh and the fact that I can no longer work in a regular job of course! I keep forgetting that and what a massive deal it is.

I agree definitely don't mention parents' help, especially as it is not forever and can't be relied upon (no reflection on your parents, just that it is not owed to you but is at their discretion).

One thing I would want to understand (but not sure whether it is helpful to ask!) is what their expectation /policy is on relocation. You have said you can't pay market rates where you live but how far out of 'town' might they reasonably expect you to move in order to find affordable private accommodation? Your DH has to travel to work, your DCs are not at school so that may not 'anchor' you in their eyes but they do have home ed clubs etc, which would be disruptive if they were not accessible. (Might be worth thinking of a more substantial-sounding word than 'club'. Perhaps 'course'?)

Also worth noting that you and DH don't run a car (not sure whether either of you can drive) so also dependent on public transport. So that might rule out an out of town location

I am afraid I don't know anything about criteria for housing so not much help!

Wreck I think a bag is a lovely idea, especially now people carry them more because of the 5p charge. Radley is probably not a brand for a young high-fashion type but for a 'grown-up', especially dog lover, I reckon it would go down well.

Cag, didn't you say it was damp.....so that affect your condition
Isn't it badly heated
State what you need:
All on one floor??
Downstairs loo?
Near facilities like shops?? Can you walk far.? You get very tired/ achy ( is that a word)
Do you live near you parents....do they help you out? Not financially but with chores etc. try for Carers Allowance for yourself.
And get letters from GP to support what you say.

And list all your medication

Wreck, I think that bag will be a wonderful gift.

Thank you that's a good point. No neither of us drive. DH works for a huge chain so potentially could relocate but not guaranteed. Work wise I'm more worried about myself - if I go too far away I will lose many of my pupils and I can't guarantee I'd get more (we are lucky that there's such a huge home ed community here so ample people to teach!) - same with DH's sports club.

Yes DSD was saying it's good that we aren't tied to a school :) as it was before they left school the walk was making me ill so to be further would've been awful. Not too worried about travel to home ed stuff as we are well used to that - most of their regular stuff is two buses away anyway as we pretty much always have to change in town. If we have a choice we would ideally still be one bus ride away from the town centre, which gives a lot of options. Just not affordable ones :o

But the housing register is run by the town council rather than county, so I'm a bit concerned that if we do move to another private rent, it should still be within the town. I know they have rules about having to be a resident of this town to get onto the register in the first place, but what happens if we leave? It also worries me that if we end up having to move in with mum or something (there are a couple of vague possibilities in that vein but VERY temporary) we may lose our place on the list too.

But then if we end up with a bigger second bedroom (more than 90 or 100sqft I think, current one is 84) then we would be no longer 'overcrowded' and therefore would lose our place on band B anyway. It's all a big confusing mess!

You know what's really pissing me off is that only a month ago I was feeling so positive, we had a PLAN to find a caravan and save up and actually get out of this shitty situation but now... I don't know if that can happen.

Thank you my parents live about an hour away by car but dad just had to give up the car so we won't be seeing much of them.

Need It's tricky. I would like to move city, but my husband's career only happens here or in North America, so a move would be a big move.

Christmas It wasn't really techniques that she passed on. She was an African Nurse from Nigeria and she was so different from me that I felt I could relax and be myself without having to conform to any of the standards that I am normally judged by (e.g. she didn't care whether I had a private school English accent or an Oxbridge degree). She was also incredibly relaxed and made it clear that all she wanted from me was that I should be relaxed too. The funny thing was that under those circumstances I found that I could be completely relaxed. It was a useful learning experience.

cag can you write a letter to the housing people making a proposal, exactly what you want, e.g your ideal situation. At least the they have something to work towards. People at the council will then say what they then can or cant do. So go in all guns politely blazing.

wreck love the bag.

Also great news about the finance planning guy, good to have positive news.

I had a frugal win at hairdressers, they had phoned to say my stylist had left (not happy about that) so said would I like a cut with someone else for free? Yes please.

The bag is lovely.
Good news on the investments need.
And the free hair cut.
Cag, does your council publish the criteria for housing. Can you point out and evidence how you meet each criteria. And yes technically if you can't pay you are being made homeless.
What about home ed resources/curriculum/ network? Rather than club?
Yes the Barbour I wanted is wax and fully fur lined as we are very outdoors. I could have waited I suppose.
Also spent £80 on 4 bras all in the sale at all at least 1/3 off.

Oh and £13 in asda

Cag do you think your gp would write a letter supporting your case. I have no idea if gps do that but we have done them for families at school so I can't see why they wouldn't.

One of my top tips cag for dealing with people is to smile. Be polite. Be calm. And ask them what are they going to do about it.

Not that you wouldn't be all of the above. But take the facts. Try not to get emotional easier said than done and make it their problem.

Tell them how moving out of town would affect your work. Ask how if that happens they will support you.

It's an awful crap situation. I can't fully understand it but I feel your frustration.

It will all be ok.

Cag it might help to fill in one of these forms:

www.cambridgeshire.gov.uk/downloads/file/4035/family_caf_form

It gives a snapshot of your whole family situation and lets them see not just the house problem and the rent, but all of the other complications that you are juggling. I'm not sure whether the same form is used in all counties but they might have an equivalent in your location. If you do it, then it can be forwarded on by your GP to the children's services people and they will prioritise action because there are children involved.

Thread fell off TIO , so am not up to date.

Lovely bag Wreck

Spent £35 on Body Shop using MSN link for a bargain bundle. Super market this week was £100 needs much closer control in future.

Cag I can't add anything but good luck with the housing people.

Enjoy the coat Life. Don't let the work stresses get you down.

Em gives brilliant advice Cag. Leave emotion out of it. You need a factual, evidenced case as to why you need to be rehoused. Don't be afraid to be a pain. Don't be afraid of silence either, let them answer. Don't waffle.

That's a shame Cath that you feel judged in that way. Attitudes like this explain to some extent Brexit and Trump. Remember though you can chose to allow them to make you feel that way and take some power back. I bet Alan Sugar didn't exactly confirm to your standard high powered suit.

Boo for the ticket Scarecrow but great news for your DS.

Sorry if I have missed anyone. I have an eye test. Not in a town I go to often so might look for Christmas presents.

Spends today will be hair cut. And maybe some Christmas decs at the garden centre.

I want to do a super on trend right now "scandi christmas" table. Lots of wooden decorations and candles and natural fabrics. I saw some lovely ones. But may have to stealth buy.

I have a couple of lanterns so need church candles for these.

i am also still in bed. Pinteresting Christmas ideas and drinking tea. I love days off.