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15 yr old doesn't want the vaccine.

411 replies

legohurts16 · 31/12/2021 22:40

My 15 yr old DD does not want the covid vaccine. She doesn't think the benefits outweigh the risks. She is very mature and has read up on the subject and is adamant that at the moment she doesn't want it.

Her reasons are that it was - a rushed vaccine with little testing- the illness is so mild in children and teens that she doesn't think it is necessary. Me and my DH really want her to have it but I suppose ultimately it is her decision. Her 13 yr old brother and all her cousins have been vaccinated and in her friendship group it is literally half and half.

She says at the moment she isn't planning on going to Spain or the US so it isn't necessary. My hubby is adamant she has to have it and has booked her an appointment for Monday and will take her kicking and screaming if he has too. Funnily enough at the start of the pandemic he was the one who said there would be no way he would vaccinate our children against a mild illness but now omricon is here he is worried for her.

Should she be forced if we feel it is right or should she be free to make her own choice?

OP posts:
sirfredfredgeorge · 31/12/2021 22:43

This reply has been deleted

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dementedpixie · 31/12/2021 22:43

If she doesn't want it then staff will not give her it against her will. I dont agree with her but not sure how you could force her to have it.

Many millions of doses have been given so I don't see how it hasn't been tested

Gooseandamoose · 31/12/2021 22:45

Should she be forced? You've got to be f'ing kidding.

trollopolis · 31/12/2021 22:45

If she thinks the testing was 'rushed' in some perjorative way, then she hasn't looked in to it properly

I don't think you can or indeed should attempt to force an unwilling team.

But I would be concerned that she has fallen for misinformation

elelel · 31/12/2021 22:47

Her reasons are that it was - a rushed vaccine with little testing-

Yet you say she has researched it maturely?

OvaHere · 31/12/2021 22:48

I took 14 yr old DS earlier this week for his 2nd vaccine (his choice). The vaccinator explicitly asked him if he consented even though I'd filled in all the parental consent forms. I'm presuming had he said no she wouldn't have administered it.

legohurts16 · 31/12/2021 22:48

@sirfredfredgeorge

The JCVI don't think she needs it either remember.
yep exactly - so I can see her point - I just worry it is going to be rife when she goes back to school next week. I am proud of how she backs up her reasoning though.
OP posts:
Lacedwithgrace · 31/12/2021 22:49

I'm not anti-vax and intend to get Dd vaccinated but at 15, your dd should be able to make her own choice and as long as she feels comfortable with her own risks and is aware of how others are at risk, there's no reason why she should be forced to have it

Wellbythebloodyhell · 31/12/2021 22:50

My DC don't want it either even at the expense of a holiday abroad that's already paid for, I'm not going to force them its their choice. I have to agree theres very little benefit to them personally on a medical basis so I'm not going to argue with their decision. I'll happily take them for the vaccine If they change their mind.

Also I very much doubt any vaccinator will inject a child that's been dragged there kicking and screaming so all your DH will be doing is causing a scene and distressing his daughter. Respect her choice.

Freddiefox · 31/12/2021 22:51

How is dh going to force her? Kicking and screaming? He’s either abusive or playing ‘the man of the house’ card.

Where do you stand op?

FurryAntiWaxer · 31/12/2021 22:55

I think the long term benefit to her in staring down your DH bluster wildly exceeds that of the vaccine. Tell him his personal feelings don't outweigh her bodily autonomy.

FunnysInLaJardin · 31/12/2021 22:57

you need to speak with her and persuade her. What research has she done which is better than the WHO guidance?

DS1 is 16 and voiced similar opinions last year. We spoke to him and he has now had his first vaccine.

They are still children and have a societal duty, as do we all, to be vaccinated

FunnysInLaJardin · 31/12/2021 22:59

@elelel

Her reasons are that it was - a rushed vaccine with little testing-

Yet you say she has researched it maturely?

Quite! Did Bob down the pub tell her that?
ANameChangeAgain · 31/12/2021 23:01

Both of my teens had covid before vaccines and honestly have had worse colds, luckily. My dh and I are and were at the time vaccinated so weren't particularly unwell.
Mine were vaccinated when offered for both their own education, protection against mutations and for "the greater good". I'm not entirely happy about child vaccines being given to keep the transmission amongst the general population down, its fine to protect the vulnerable, but if its to protect adults who refuse a vaccine (which i suspect is a lot of the case) I'm less sympathetic.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 31/12/2021 23:02

Bodily autonomy. You need to accept her right to make a decision you disagree with (and let her know you'll also support her if she changes her mind)

Justwingingit2005 · 31/12/2021 23:03

She will be asked at the jab centre and if she says no they won't do it.
My middle DS was on the fence about having a jab, when we got to the jab centre they asked him and he said yes he would have it. The lady said to him if you are not sure please say so.
At the age of 15 she is able to make decisions on her own health.

glimpsing · 31/12/2021 23:06

Just wait til everyone at her school starts having it. She may change her mind.

XenoBitch · 31/12/2021 23:06

No, you can't force her. It is simply not an option. You also can't taker her kicking and screaming. No vaccinator would touch her in such a state, and it would cause huge anxiety for other people waiting to get their vaccine. Your DH ought to be ashamed that he thinks forcing your DD is even an option.

Obsidiansphere · 31/12/2021 23:08

It’s her choice, her body.

chipsandpeas · 31/12/2021 23:08

its her choice, you cant make her have it
who knows whats going to happen next, vaccine passports may start covering over 12s limiting what they can do like in other countries

musicalfrog · 31/12/2021 23:09

Imo it's not worth the argument. Her body, her choice and why should any man (even her father) dictate to her on this point? Isn't he bothered that it might ruin their relationship? Or do they have a problematic relationship anyway?

xyzandabc · 31/12/2021 23:10

Unless your dad explicitly says yes, the vaccinator will not jab her. Your DH can not force her.

DD is 14 and does want to be vaccinated but she's tried 4 times so far. Every time has a panic attack, crying, shaking, visibly distressed and just can't bring herself to say yes, go ahead when at the centre. They won't do it until she says yes.

Shmithecat2 · 31/12/2021 23:12

@elelel

Her reasons are that it was - a rushed vaccine with little testing-

Yet you say she has researched it maturely?

This.

However, your dh should absolutely NOT force her against her will.

Comefromaway · 31/12/2021 23:13

It has to be her choice. She will not be vaccinated against her will. At the vaccine centre they ask you, are you happy to go ahead.

I think the risks and advantages are more complicated in young people. I wanted my teen to be vaccinated and he did too (I know a 15 year old and a 16 year old who died from Covid, however both had extra risk factors). And I do know children with long lasting effects.

But it has to be her choice. All you can do is talk with her about the available info.

WorriedGiraffe · 31/12/2021 23:14

It’s her body and her choice, and at her age your DH should be teaching her that nobody can force to her to something with her body that she does not agree to. Also she’s a teenager, him kicking up a fuss about it will just reinforce her to do the opposite!

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