Covid has affected friendships too. I’m seeing people I’ve been friends with a long time turn into frightened rabbits , so cautious, but also a lot of really inconsistent behaviour when it comes to risk. I’ve tried my best to accommodate, allowing and trying to understand peoples fears, but this week I’d had enough. I’ve got one friend who won’t even go to a cafe, and hasn’t done for two years.
I've got one friend who will not go outside her precise local area (defined by the boundaries of the ward she lives in), yet her child goes to school every day. Another friend whose child goes to nursery, but is not allowed to go to the playpark and play in the fresh air. Another one has a rule of only seeing a friend exactly once per month. No particular reason is given for this. She works in an office full of people, by the way, and her child is in schoolbut still, once her once-a-month meet-a-friend slot has been taken up, then it is too dangerous to meet another friend until the allotted weeks are up-not even "taking a walk around an open air park with a friend, with both of us wearing masks." I haven't see her for nearly two years.
I think psychologists call this kind of behavior "bargaining"-- "If I'm good and give up a certain number of fun experiences, then the God of Pestilence will take pity on me and ensure that none of us catch COVID via the school, daycare and workplaces that we spend hours in each day.... right?"
Like you, I'm trying to be understanding but the sheer silliness and the willingness to throw friendships in the bin, is starting to wear out my patience.
I don't even want to talk online because the daft behavior is getting so hard for me to be patient with, and because I suspect that they're probably judging me for doing things like meeting friends for playdates in the outdoors. And because we have nothing to talk about as we are not sharing experiences any more! They are leading the dullest lives ever right now, and I can't talk about what we're doing because it would be rude to sit there telling Anne about how "me and Jane and Lucy had this great time together the other day," and because again, I feel like they're going to judge me. I don't want to talk about news or current affairs because so much of it comes back to COVID and I don't want to have a disagreement.
So of course a whole bunch of previously satisfying friendships are fading away. Our kids are forgetting each other---literally. I showed DD1 a photo of one of the abovementioned family's kids that she used to play with, and she didn't know who it was (!).
There is going to be the biggest increase in lonelinesslong termas a result of these restrictions.