Am I going to die :(

[Iwannabelikeyouohh]

My husband has just had a positive LFT.

I’m absolutely petrified. I’m extremely obese with a BMI of 40.

I am fully vaccinated but I have had two different vaccines. 1 AZ and 1 Pfizer.

I feel physically sick with worry. 😓

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

I don’t think my behaviour on this particular situation is “abnormal”

I think anyone in my position would feed the same.[/quote]
Gently OP, your reaction is very unusual and it would be hugely beneficial for you to get some help specifically around catastrophising. It's exhausting to live in a constant state of high vigilance panicking about worst case scenarios and it's not mean or unsupportive of people to point out that it's not healthy or typical behaviour. It is something you need to address in order to be as happy and healthy as possible both mentally and physically.

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

I don’t think my behaviour on this particular situation is “abnormal”

I think anyone in my position would feed the same.[/quote]
I don't know about today, but yesterday it absolutely was.

Bear in mind that people of your BMI, and who are decades older were actively nursing or caring for covid patients in hospitals and care homes before there were vaccinations. They carried on with intimate and close care despite the risk, for months. You are in a house with one person who has it, and who will be infectious for maybe five days. You've had the vaccine combination that the rest of us could only dream of.

In glad you've calmed down a little today, and you can absolutely deal with this. But please don't pretend that the things you were thinking and saying yesterday were normal for most people.

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

I don’t think my behaviour on this particular situation is “abnormal”

I think anyone in my position would feed the same.[/quote]
I have posted on this thread already.

You are experiencing a disproportionate response - which is why I took the time to suggest some steps you could take in case part of that is attributable to physical illness.

You're not CEV. At worst, CV. That makes a huge difference even before the young/vaccinated/it's over 18 months since this all kicked off - and I very much hope that you aren't planning your funeral outfit for your MIL on the basis that if you're guaranteed to die if you catch it, she's already dead for all practical intent and purposes. Because that's the logical conclusion from your beliefs - that's what you are unintentionally telling us (and your DH, by the way).

Sorry your response is definitely not normal. Yes be concerned and aware but your fear that serious illness or even death is inevitable is skewed, morbid and against all statistical logic. But that is the thing with anxiety, no logic applies once it takes over.

Your dh may not have any symptoms at all. Nor may you or ds if you were positive.

Oh OP I think the fact that you think it is normal it really isnt. So many of us now have had Covid or had it in the house.

And my love even if you are negative you cannot go on holiday. Yes you dont need to isolate but you do need to limit your interactions with people - that and it can take 4 to 5 days to appear. You really dont want to be stuck on holiday and get it. Cancelling is the only way forward. The fact that you want to go I think shows that you aren't thinking

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

I don’t think my behaviour on this particular situation is “abnormal”

I think anyone in my position would feed the same.[/quote]
My best friend found out this morning that the person she car shares with and sits next to at work has had a positive lft. Her response was "ah hope I don't catch it but will see what happens". I think that is a more "normal" response. Yours is disproptionate

@Quartz2208

And my love even if you are negative you cannot go on holiday

Why? It’s only an hour away. I won’t get stuck, I could just drive home?
There’s no guidelines that say I can’t go.

I don’t plan on spending time with other people.
If I went indoors I’d wear a mask, as I always do.

I just planned to go and spend lots of time outside with DS.

If I stay here I might aswell go to work tomorrow and send DS to nursery.

I had the week booked off for our holiday.

I think it’s really unfair to suggest I’m not thinking straight because I’m going to go on the holiday.

My husband also thinks it’s a good idea and several family members I’ve spoke to too.

I’m sure in my situation others would do the same.

Could your dm go with you?

@LIZS

Unfortunately not. She has to work and can’t get the time off. Otherwise she would have come.

I really don’t want to stay at home for the week.

I’d rather limit mine and DS time in the house whilst DH is here.

So I either go back to work tomorrow and DS to nursery or we go to the caravan we have booked.

I really didn’t think it was a bad idea.

I’m crap with decision making so I’ve spoken to my mum, best friend and obviously DH. None of them suggested I shouldn’t go.

If you are sure you can just pack up and leave easily should you feel unwell, take your food with you so you don't have to go out to shops etc.

You are suppose to limit contact and only do what is necessary.

Are you really not going to be in contact with anyone else when you go to the caravan - I dont get the thinking that you are at a huge risk but you can go on holiday having been in contact with a positive case?

The advice is this:

As well as getting a PCR test, you may also consider:

limiting close contact with people outside your household, especially in enclosed spaces
wearing a face covering in enclosed spaces and where you are unable to maintain social distancing
limiting contact with anyone who is clinically extremely vulnerable
taking part in twice weekly LFD testing

And if you do get ill - can you really drive home? Your desire I think is flight to get away from the situation and that I dont think is a helpful one here.

I know many people where an initial PCR was negative then positive 2-3 days later.

@Quartz2208

You are suppose to limit contact and only do what is necessary.

I don’t think that’s exactly true, is it?

I had a message from test and trace telling me I didn’t have to isolate but I should get a PCR, which I have done.

I’m not trying to get away from the situation, i’m just trying to make things a bit better and not miserable for all of us.

I can’t get a refund on the holiday as I would’ve had to cancel within 7 days or 72 hours for a full refund.

I get your logic but only a few hours ago you were struggling having ds one to one all day. The trip will very much be that without any of the comforts of home.

If someone you live with has symptoms of COVID-19, or has tested positive for COVID-19, you will not need to self-isolate if any of the following apply:

you're fully vaccinated – this means 14 days have passed since your final dose of a COVID-19 vaccine given by the NHS

you're under 18 years, 6 months old
you're taking part or have taken part in a COVID-19 vaccine trial

you're not able to get vaccinated for medical reasons

Even if you do not have symptoms, you should still:

get a PCR test on GOV.UK to check if you have COVID-19

follow advice on how to avoid catching and spreading COVID-19

consider limiting contact with people who are at higher risk from COVID-19

……. This is on the GOV website.

I don’t think at all that I will be going up to anyone and having close contact with them.

I have some activities booked that are outdoor.
A woodland walk, pond exploring and nature trial.

I will take my own food and eat at the caravan.
We’re right by a beach and there’s a huge outdoor play area that we can go to.

I wasn’t planning on spending time in crowded places.

Oh I don’t know now 😞😞

OP, please don't go on the holiday. You may pass covid on to someone who really is CEV.

I'm all about assessing your own risk and getting on with living life and so on. But going about your business when pretty much all your close family contacts have tested positive is just incredibly thoughtless.

Lots of us have lost money from stuff we've booked because we've had to isolate. It's par for the course sadly, and the risk you take when you book anything during a pandemic.

At least wait until your PCR is back. I wouldn't go whatever, but if you know it's positive you really must stay home.

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

I don’t think my behaviour on this particular situation is “abnormal”

I think anyone in my position would feed the same.[/quote]
No, I think very very few people in your position would feel the same, and if they did I would be urging them to get more / different mental health support. It isn't normal, but your severe anxiety is telling you it is. That's how anxiety works - it's making you think that it's a normal response and is trying to convince you that you need to be this afraid.

But it isn't a normal response and you don't need to be this afraid.

You need to be totally open and honest with your mental health team because the help you're getting isn't working. You deserve not to feel this way!!

@LIZS

I get your logic but only a few hours ago you were struggling having ds one to one all day. The trip will very much be that without any of the comforts of home.

@LIZS

Yesterday was a very day, husbands PCR panic etc….

We’ve been fine today.

For reference I usually have DS one to one all day.
DH takes over when he comes home at 5pm and by take over I mean he helps out with tea and bed time etc.

@GoldFrankensteinAndGrrr

* if you know it's positive you really must stay home.*

Jesus. I’m not stupid!!

Of course I would stay at home if I was positive.

Do you really think most people who are contacts of positive people will be staying home, when they don’t need to.

I think people must think I’m going on holiday to socialise and eat out or party etc…

I’ve explained above what my intentions are and the vast majority is outdoors.

@makelovenotpetrol

You need to be totally open and honest with your mental health team because the help you're getting isn't working. You deserve not to feel this way!!

I am open and honest with them.

[quote Iwannabelikeyouohh]@makelovenotpetrol

You need to be totally open and honest with your mental health team because the help you're getting isn't working. You deserve not to feel this way!!

I am open and honest with them.[/quote]
And what are they suggesting to help with your serious anxiety? As you've been posting like this for a while now and it isn't getting any better.

@GoldFrankensteinAndGrrr

But going about your business when pretty much all your close family contacts have tested positive is just incredibly thoughtless.

Just to point out, we saw MIL & FIL for two hours on Tuesday evening.

They are both positive. They saw my SiL Wednesday and now her son is positive(my nephew)

My DH is now positive.

My DH is the only one I live with and we haven’t been in the same room as each other since Friday.

If you're negative and DH is well enough to look after himself, I would go, minimise the chance of you picking it up. I'd minimise interaction with other people whilst away.

Have you seen the Canadian studies on mixed vaccines? They showed better protection levels than two doses of the same vaccine.

@makelovenotpetrol

I’ve answered that already and explained what I do as part of my treatment.

@Chewbecca

Have you seen the Canadian studies on mixed vaccines? They showed better protection levels than two doses of the same vaccine

I thought that was mix of Pfizer and Moderna?

I have AZ followed by Pfizer.

I had them 13 weeks apart and I thought the UK study had only looked at an interval of 4 weeks.

I would ring the caravan park - you are still planning on mixing with quite a lot of people and antedoctally I know a lot who have had a PCR negative then come down with it

I know its tough it really is and its awful having to cancel and change things but really staying at home is the best course of action.

We have all being there (DS was recently positive) and all we did was send DD to school (spoke to them) because we could very well be passing it on and it is very difficult to minimise interaction even outdoors.

I know your instinct is flight here - I get that. It must be incredibly scary but you have had a lot of contact now

And yes I do think most people do try and limit interactions and also are honest with people as to what the situation is and let them decide.