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Original poster

Just can't take any more of this new normal

231 replies

JuneMoonstone · 18/05/2021 10:03

I'm feeling incredibly low and depressed. I am just so, so utterly fed up of Covid. I can't be bothered to go anywhere, do anything, make plans. I've been waiting months for my 5 year old to start swimming lessons and they kept getting put off due to covid. I found out that she can start lessons next month but once she turns 6 she'll no longer be eligible so she'll only get a couple of lessons, so there's no point in her starting. Before anyone has a go at me, I completely understand there are many people far worse off than me and I am very grateful that I have not suffered from covid or lost anyone due to covid. I just feel so so despondent and depressed about the future. Everything is a chore now, there is zero fun to be had. The variants will keep coming, the threat of future lockdowns continue to loom for God knows how long, maybe forever. We're told that Covid will never go away and the old normal will never return. If I didn't have a child I think I would end it. Life has just become very small, dull, joyless, wearisome.

OP posts:
Bonheurdupasse · 18/05/2021 10:07

I feel the same.
It feels unreasonable but everything is just so depressing.

RhubarbTea · 18/05/2021 10:11

I feel the same a lot of the time. People will no doubt be along to jolly you out of it - but I hear you. It IS shit. Uncertainly coupled with nothing to look forward to is quite hard. I hope you manage to find some moments of happiness in the coming week, even if they are fleeting. Flowers

HairyFloppins · 18/05/2021 10:15

I hate not having a holiday to look forward to, it really does keep me going all year, planning etc.

Lots are feeling the same at the moment, it's just so bleak. We think we are doing well and the future looks brighter then suddenly a new variant pops up.

ComtesseDeSpair · 18/05/2021 10:18

This has been a strange eighteen months, but in a few years’ time we’ll just look back on it as a blip in our lives. It isn’t going to last forever, we’ll learn to live with whatever variants arise just as we live with different variants of ‘flu – some of which cause tens of thousands of deaths in a bad year. With the best will in the world, life is not over because a five-year-old’s swimming lessons have had to be delayed.

You can worry yourself into a depression; or you can just make the best of things, knowing that it really will be over soon. Whichever route you choose has no effect on what actually happens, so the worrying is pointless.

IcedPurple · 18/05/2021 10:21

Life has just become very small, dull, joyless, wearisome.

That's how I feel.

I spent most of my adult life abroad and until February last year, I travelled 4 or 5 times a year for work. Now, my life has been reduced to my little apartment. I live alone and don't have many friends - which never bothered me as I enjoy being alone and got enough stimulation from my work and travelling - but there's a limit to that. I've barely had a face to face conversation in the past 15 months. My horizons have shrunk dramatically.

That said, I'm reasonably optimistic about the future. Certain posters here are jumping on the latest scariant like flies on shit, but when I read what the actual experts say, it's not quite grounds for panic. Even so, over the past year I've got my hopes up only for them to be dashed so many times that I'm not going to make any plans just yet. And that's been one of the most frustrating things about this past year - the Coronacoaster of hope followed by disappointment, time and time again.

wonderstuff123 · 18/05/2021 10:21

I hear you. Am so fed up with everything.The sodding 1 way systems in my uni library,the signs reminding us to socially distance,the fact that we're now "allowed" hug making news headlines,the them and us rhetoric of the media and politicians between people who chose to be vaccinated and those who chose not to be.

It's shit beyond belief.

Wellbythebloodyhell · 18/05/2021 10:22

Yep. Totally get it making future plans just seems pointless . Even with the vaccine success it does feel never ending at the moment.

lavenderandwisteria · 18/05/2021 10:22

It is hard, pp is correct it’s a blip in our lives but harder for children. Flowers

IcedPurple · 18/05/2021 10:24

@ComtesseDeSpair

This has been a strange eighteen months, but in a few years’ time we’ll just look back on it as a blip in our lives. It isn’t going to last forever, we’ll learn to live with whatever variants arise just as we live with different variants of ‘flu – some of which cause tens of thousands of deaths in a bad year. With the best will in the world, life is not over because a five-year-old’s swimming lessons have had to be delayed.

You can worry yourself into a depression; or you can just make the best of things, knowing that it really will be over soon. Whichever route you choose has no effect on what actually happens, so the worrying is pointless.

A very unhelpful post.

We'll look back 'in a few years' you say? A few years is quite a long time, especially for children. And the poster made it clear that she knows she's quite fortunate compared to others so I really don't think you're showing 'the best will in the world' when you say "life is not over because a five-year-old’s swimming lessons have had to be delayed." You're being insensitive and smug.

It's not just the swimming lessons, or the missed holidays, or the postponed wedding or whatever. It's one thing on top of another, or another, for months on end. Saying to 'make the best of things' is a bit last year. Next you'll be telling the OP to go for a walk of bake some banana bread.

Blowingagale · 18/05/2021 10:26

A lot of this is shit and things like swimming lessons lost. I think it’s normal not liking life now. If you are struggling a lot then you might want to go to the GP (I know might be more hassle than Covid).

A thought for the swimming- are there other parents that you know with similar problems? If enough of you asked do you think they might run a special set of lessons? If a lot of the children come from a particular school do you know someone on PTA that might ask Head or PE to support the request?

savethegrannies · 18/05/2021 10:27

@ComtesseDeSpair

This has been a strange eighteen months, but in a few years’ time we’ll just look back on it as a blip in our lives. It isn’t going to last forever, we’ll learn to live with whatever variants arise just as we live with different variants of ‘flu – some of which cause tens of thousands of deaths in a bad year. With the best will in the world, life is not over because a five-year-old’s swimming lessons have had to be delayed.

You can worry yourself into a depression; or you can just make the best of things, knowing that it really will be over soon. Whichever route you choose has no effect on what actually happens, so the worrying is pointless.

Way to go completely minimising the OP's concerns and doubtless making her feel even worse. Isn't MN supposed to be a supportive environment?
bearandowl · 18/05/2021 10:31

I totally get it OP. These lockdown measures are ridiculously over the top. Covid is a minor infection for most - it is definitely not in the same league as the plague or Ebola

CheltenhamLady · 18/05/2021 10:31

It does feel relentless doesn't it?

Gothichouse40 · 18/05/2021 10:33

I hear you. You can't wake up and think oh I will go out and do X today. It's got to be pre-booked about 3 months in advance. The constant endless queuing really drives me nuts. Yes, I agree the joy has been sucked out. Don't get me wrong, I feel fortunate to be here to moan about it. I do understand how you feel. I try to keep busy and do things I enjoy but for a while I was exactly like you. It's only recently Ive ventured out for lunch or a coffee. I feel I don't have half the confidence I used to either.

Figgygal · 18/05/2021 10:35

Things are improving if you can be buoyed by that and see hope then maybe a trip to your go would help

I’m fed up too but know I need to push self out of this covid funk or it’ll be easy to just stay at home stewing

Can’t you look for other swimming lessons?

Changemaname1 · 18/05/2021 10:35

I’m like this - been looking forward to getting some normality back and now it’s here it feels like a bit of a chore , a bit flat

The only thing I really want to do is see loved ones abroad though so untill I can do that everything else will probably seem a bit shit but I had hoped having a bit more freedom to socialise etc in the meantime would help Confused

StrawberryLipstickStateOfMind · 18/05/2021 10:39

I get it too OP. And I agree with @bearandowl about this being over the top.

The thing that has pissed me off all along is nothing has ever been said about what would have actually happened if successful vaccines hadn't been created, and now variants seem to be an issue, nothing is really being said about the long term. June 21st looks likely to be delayed now because of the Indian variant. I want to know what the government actually envisages happening in the face of every new variant that might crop up along the way. How long can people be expected to live under the threat of their basic freedoms being snatched away again? This isn't right, it's gone on long enough now. How long can businesses like pubs and restaurants cope, it's just not sustainable.

Awaits the first poster who will come along to say 'COVID doesn't care if you're fed up'.

Nyfluff · 18/05/2021 10:43

Can you make a list of all the places you can go, as there's loads open? I'm mostly bedbound but I'd give anything to have a week to jump in a car and go to lovely nature hikes, visit attractions, stay in a hotel and have a fancy lunch and mooch around etc. It's all open, you've presumably been vaxed and people are deemed safe to meet. Ignoring the doom and gloom, in real life it seems pretty normal. My disabled dc depended on weekly water therapy, we miss it enormously. Swimming pools for individual sessions are open, although no use for us. Can you book private lessons or regular 6+ ones? A normal routine with treats will help a lot of people.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 18/05/2021 10:43

I sympathise with you generally but on your specific point-

  1. I’d take the swimming lessons for a short time that she’s offered to get her started
  2. I’d then take her swimming myself to give her practice while you look for age 6+ lessons elsewhere
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 18/05/2021 10:44

My Ds 7 has slipped back swimming wise so i do agree it’s frustrating! I was thinking that swimming was an area that’s been crap for that age group.

FinallyHere · 18/05/2021 10:48

I absolutely understand that things are not ideal now and appreciate just how difficult it is for everyone. The younger you are, I think, the more difficult things seem to be because you have less to compare it to.

The ability to control your mind, to remind yourself of what there is to be thankful for does not come easy to anyone. A conscious effort to remind yourself of the good things will make life easier to get through and is a great habit to pass onto DC. It is a thing that is really good to do especially now.

Absolutely recommend.

TheVampiresWife · 18/05/2021 10:50

@ComtesseDeSpair

This has been a strange eighteen months, but in a few years’ time we’ll just look back on it as a blip in our lives. It isn’t going to last forever, we’ll learn to live with whatever variants arise just as we live with different variants of ‘flu – some of which cause tens of thousands of deaths in a bad year. With the best will in the world, life is not over because a five-year-old’s swimming lessons have had to be delayed.

You can worry yourself into a depression; or you can just make the best of things, knowing that it really will be over soon. Whichever route you choose has no effect on what actually happens, so the worrying is pointless.

Biscuit
ComtesseDeSpair · 18/05/2021 10:50

I think “insensitive and smug” is an odd analysis, unless you believe I and other people who don’t believe the world is over and this is the new normal have not had a single disappointment over the last year. Has it been harder for children? Time will tell, I suppose; but I wonder what the average fifteen-year-old will say in five years’ time if asked to recall being a ten-year-old in 2020/21. I’m not convinced that in the main they’ll have anything like the recollection of doom some adults are projecting. Children just get on with things: the very nature of being a child is that you have very little control over your life in the first place, it often doesn’t make much sense to you, and you just do as you’re told. Broadly, don’t panic and worry about your child’s well-being because they can’t have swimming lessons. The impact is unlikely to be anything like what your adult mind thinks.

selfieelf · 18/05/2021 10:51

I feel the same. Yeah things are opening again but the masks, the QR codes, ordering and paying on your phone, the look of fear on everyone's faces, treating all humans as potential germ carriers as opposed to people. One way systems, queuing, booking weeks in advance...

Feels like life ended in March 2020.

newlabelwriter · 18/05/2021 10:51

Feel exactly the same. Weather is really not helping. Woke up with a horrible headache this morning too. Urgghh.