Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Original poster

Parents refused the vaccine and now have covid

325 replies

ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:04

Even worse, they looked after my dd today as we are moving house and this has now meant we can’t see DPs parents tomorrow, on his birthday, for the first time in 6 months.
I am devastated. Worried for them (and me as I am pregnant). But most of all bloody angry and I don’t know if iabu to feel this way. But I can’t help being annoyed they didn’t have the vaccine. They have turned it down twice both from work and the GP.
I don’t even know what to say to PILs at the moment as I am embarrassed at the way my parents have handled the whole pandemic..and it has now cost PILs seeing their grandchild Sad
Not a question really, just wanted to vent. Maybe it’s my fault for letting them look after her? But didn’t feel I could blackmail them to make them have the vaccine. It’s so shit.
Any ideas to help me salvage DPs birthday much appreciated. I don’t even have a cake as MIL was bringing that.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Original poster
ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:26

@AlexaShutUp yes I think I am more annoyed at myself tbh, then again we needed to get the house done which wasn’t possible with a toddler.

OP posts:
pickingdaisies · 05/04/2021 22:27

Well that's the hard bit over, OP. I think it's time you let your parents know that they don't get to put you and your family at unnecessary risk from now on. It's not blackmail, it's self protection. Fingers crossed for the tests.

Original poster
ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:29

As for their reasons - I am not really sure. I was shocked when they refused it any if I’m being honest upset that they wouldn’t do everything to keep us protected. We don’t have any other childcare options.

OP posts:
Original poster
ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:29

and

OP posts:
GreyhoundG1rl · 05/04/2021 22:29

Why did they refuse the vaccine? Haven't a shred of sympathy for this level of foolishness, tbh.

Original poster
ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:30

@pickingdaisies you’re so right.
Thank you. We have LF so will be testing like mad.

OP posts:
IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 05/04/2021 22:31

Surely working in a school you knew there was a risk they could bring it home so took the gamble re childcare. I hope they are ok, not everyone wants the vaccine as it’s new.

TokenGinger · 05/04/2021 22:31

If your DP hasn't been in touch with your parents, he can still see his own parents tomorrow. It's only those who have had immediate contact that need to isolate.

islockdownoveryet · 05/04/2021 22:33

That would annoy me too , let’s hope they don’t get too unwell and they haven’t passed it onto someone else .
They could of still caught it if they’d had the vaccine and or passed it on to your dc but the chance would of been lower and that may not get as unwell.
It’s a scary gamble to take especially that you say they work in a school .
I really hope everything is ok .

Blessex · 05/04/2021 22:33

@IceCreamAndCandyfloss yes but having now seen over 30 million vaccinated vs the effects of Covid - it still doesn’t really make sense to refuse it risk wise. It’s a terrifying virus. I have seen it close up.

Wellbythebloodyhell · 05/04/2021 22:34

Even with a vaccine its not guaranteed to not pick up the virus (although possibly reduced) given their occupation this could have happened at any point in the last 12 months yet you allowed yourself and DD to be in contact. Even vaccinated they could have still tested positive without showing any symptoms

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 05/04/2021 22:38

[quote Blessex]@IceCreamAndCandyfloss yes but having now seen over 30 million vaccinated vs the effects of Covid - it still doesn’t really make sense to refuse it risk wise. It’s a terrifying virus. I have seen it close up.[/quote]
I know and I don’t get it either whatsoever but unless it’s made mandatory people are free to take whatever medical treatment they choose. We don’t know why they have refused it.

The OP seems to think they should have had it for childcare reasons but maybe they don’t agree with that thinking.

Waterfallgirl · 05/04/2021 22:40

I would be very cross . In your shoes being pregnant - especially after 28 weeks - you are at increased risk so they have shown disregard for both your child and you. Not to mention their work colleagues and other family members.
I would be very very angry and to be honest this would really change the relationship I had with my parents. As for the birthday party- theoretically if your dh hasn’t seen them he is not a contact - but should he now see MIL if your child has been in contact with them (and you( .... I wouldn’t.

saraclara · 05/04/2021 22:43

If your DP hasn't been in touch with your parents, he can still see his own parents tomorrow. It's only those who have had immediate contact that need to isolate.

Good point! Has he actually been in contact with your parents, @ofallthedays?

RedcurrantPuff · 05/04/2021 22:44

@ilovesooty

If you're angry I don't blame you.
This

I know it’s their choice but I think I’d be too angry to speak to them just now. Their choice isn’t made in a vacuum and has bad consequences for other people.

LiJo2015 · 05/04/2021 22:45

Sid you know they hadnt had the jab? Did you even ask? So they looked after your kid and now they have covid - and your angry? I can understand worried for your own and yours health, but you know the climate we are in so should have asked about whther they had the jab

Spring2021 · 05/04/2021 22:48

Personally I would tell/warn PIL ASAP so they can decide but personally I wouldn’t let them risk it just incase and hope both your parents are also ok.

LouiseTrees · 05/04/2021 22:49

@ofallthedays

As for their reasons - I am not really sure. I was shocked when they refused it any if I’m being honest upset that they wouldn’t do everything to keep us protected. We don’t have any other childcare options.
Are your in laws not able to do childcare then (after your isolation period of course)?
QueenOfTheDoubleWide · 05/04/2021 22:49

I'm afraid I would be bloody furious and letting them know very clearly that their stupidity has put you and your family at risk as well as ruining your DH's birthday
I'm afraid that lack of care for you all would colour my relationship with them going forward as they clearly do not care as much about you all as they should

WishingHopingThinkingPraying · 05/04/2021 22:50

I think I'd put aside my upset and annoyance for 2-3 weeks and focus on your parents getting better. I hope it's a mild dose and if it is, I'd be very grateful for that.

But yes, I'd be deeply frustrated about their choice.

Original poster
ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:51

We saw them in their garden for about 45 minutes yesterday so need to check with test and trace in the morning. If we don’t have to isolate I will definitely be telling him to go meet them on his own.

OP posts:
Original poster
ofallthedays · 05/04/2021 22:53

@LouiseTrees they live 2 hours away, and unlike mine are very strict with the rules

OP posts:
ButtonMoonLoon · 05/04/2021 22:53

I wouldn’t be using them for childcare from now onwards.
Can your PIL help in the future once you’ve all passed isolation?

Reinventinganna · 05/04/2021 22:56

Can you and your Dh do a lft before seeing his parents?

saraclara · 05/04/2021 22:57

@ofallthedays

We saw them in their garden for about 45 minutes yesterday so need to check with test and trace in the morning. If we don’t have to isolate I will definitely be telling him to go meet them on his own.
If you were outside in the garden I don't think you and your DH would be close contacts, as long as you didn't hug them or get very close to them while they were talking.

Are they at least terribly apologetic?