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Original poster

Husbands vaccine is today and he won't go

431 replies

Dbwoshem · 12/03/2021 07:50

My husband is group 6 (age 36) and its taken me a lot of effort to get his vaccine appointment booked through our gp. I had mine last week and I was so, so relieved.

This morning he gets up to leave for work and tells me he isnt going. Now this is because he is absolutely TERRIFIED of needles. He has a severe phobia of them. We have been together 20 years. He has had blood tests or injections on a few occasions and has always fainted. I do feel for him.

But I have spent alot of time this past week speaking to him about it and trying to ease his concerns. And also to stress how important I think it is that he should have it to protect himself and our family. He was going with me to assist up until this morning when he is refusing. He has now gone to work and I don't think he will come back for his appointment.

What do I do? I know its a phobia, but I am so frustrated that's hes willing to put himself and our family at risk. He has also said that God forbid if he ever gets cscener, or diabetes or any illness in his life that requires treatment from injection he will refuse all treatment!! This is a big, burly guy who is covered in tattoos! (tattoo needles are different supposedly)
I can't respect his choice, I just can't. Our whole weekend will be spent either arguing or not speaking to each other now aswell

OP posts:
Orchidflower1 · 12/03/2021 18:33

Great job from both of you!

mumwon · 12/03/2021 18:36

Good on him(& you op)!

Madcats · 12/03/2021 19:03

OP that is fabulous news. I suggest you start planning a post-lockdown mutual treat.

DartmoorDoughnut · 12/03/2021 19:04

Awesome news Grin

espressoontap · 12/03/2021 19:23

Fair play to him. Hopefully he won't get as worked up about the second one.

Wannabangbang · 12/03/2021 19:43

Brilliant newsSmile

user1493494961 · 12/03/2021 20:24

So pleased for you all.

WombatChocolate · 12/03/2021 20:27

Well done him, and you too for helping him get through it.

Buy him a cream cake tomorrow as a treat to say well done. He should feel proud at overcoming his fear today. Hopefully he will feel better about the 2nd one.

DenisetheMenace · 12/03/2021 20:30

Fantastic, well done him.

seepingweeping · 12/03/2021 20:51

Tattoo needles are so much worse than injections.

Diabetic needles are thin as hairs. I had to take 7 injections daily with them when I was pregnant. Never felt a thing and I don't like needles

KitesFlyingInTheWind · 12/03/2021 20:53

@PatchworkElmer

Honestly, I’d have very little time for this. He’s had MONTHS when it was clear that vaccination was on the cards, and could’ve sought therapy in that time. I’d feel the same as you OP.
To be fair, nothing has been open and there has probably been very little face to face therapy for phobias.

Unfortunately he has to make a choice- have it or not have it. There's not really an alternative. Logically, if he catches covid, he may well have more than one needle to deal with, but phobias are not logical/rational.

KitesFlyingInTheWind · 12/03/2021 20:54

Oops- just read! Well done to him! I have a phobia and doubt I could have faced mine.
Hopefully the second one will be much easier now it's done once.

HeronLanyon · 12/03/2021 20:57

lovely your spider analogy really made me laugh - not for your phobia which I’m sorry you have but the image of us all having to do that for Covid related reasons.
I suppose I shouldn’t laugh as we couldn’t have dreamt we’d be here 18 months ago ?!

HeronLanyon · 12/03/2021 20:58

Well done op dh. What a relief and well done him.

Babygotblueyes · 12/03/2021 21:17

CBT is good for needle phobia and he should be able to access it through IAPT in your area.

HidingFromDD · 12/03/2021 21:23

I was going to put that needle phobia isn't 'I don't like needles', it's absolute irrational terror (have a severely needle phobic daughter) and then saw he'd had it done! I hope you realise how brave he is - he faced a real fear and did it for you and your kids. My dd would also have a panic attack (and many tears) afterwards. He may be exhausted or elated tomorrow (could go either way).

For any other needle phobics out there, I went to a large centre, they said if I needed to they had beds where you could lie down and also were very willing to support needle phobics (often it takes time and lack of pressure) so please do go

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 12/03/2021 21:28

I'm so glad he had it done. I'm hoping I can do the same when it's my turn!

Bing12 · 12/03/2021 21:38

Yay!!!! Happy weekend 😊

Angelina1972 · 12/03/2021 21:42

If his phobia is so bad I wonder whether he may be able to get so diazepam prescribed by the GP. Take it 20 or so minutes before setting of for his vaccine. Diazepam would help him feel calm throughout the procedure. He’d have a nice snooze on returning home as well.

Nacreous · 12/03/2021 21:43

@Dbwoshem

We've been and he has had it Smile I am very pleased. There was a large queue and he wouldn't let me speak to them or go in with him but I waited outside and I could see him through the window. The nurse gave him a sweet to eat whilst she did it. He was fine until he got back to the car, where he had a panic attack. He's calmed down now and is having a lie down, feeling very drained but he is glad he has had it done.
For his second dose Op, it's worth asking if the surgery do needlephobic clinics - quite a few places round my way do and if not they can refer you to somewhere that does. Might not be possible but worth asking.
HopelessBlue192 · 12/03/2021 22:30

I feel so sorry for him that you've emotionally blackmailed him into this.

Nith · 12/03/2021 22:33

@HopelessBlue192

I feel so sorry for him that you've emotionally blackmailed him into this.
Don't be ridiculous. He asked OP to arrange it for him.
RedcurrantPuff · 13/03/2021 00:50

@HopelessBlue192

I feel so sorry for him that you've emotionally blackmailed him into this.
Och wheesht.

He’s done an amazing thing 😊

SakuraEdenSwan1 · 13/03/2021 03:12

[quote Dbwoshem]@icdtap he won't do anything for himself at all. I have to make all his doctors/dentist/hospital appointments. I have to accompany him. I have to order, collect and pay for his prescriptions. If I didn't do it, he would never attend anything. He needs a push. Which he asks of me. And he would never ever have therapy or counselling etc.[/quote]
More fool you for doing it, stop running around after him, if he fails to get his prescriptions etc that's all on him, you are his wife not his mother.

picknmix1984 · 13/03/2021 07:43

Poor bloke. It's probably made his phobia 10 times worse now if it was followed by a panic attack!

Good luck at getting him to the second one.

I would have got him some hypnotherapy first myself.