So, what are you going to do?

[LaMarschallin]

To the people who are saying they won't stand this any longer:

What exactly do you plan to do?

March on the streets?

Run out of your house and hug your family?

Not wear masks?

Because you can't go to the cinema, theatre, festivals, shops, libraries, cafes, pubs, send your children to school, see beauticians etc without the government's say so.

I'm just interested to know what the alternative is to trying to keep the infection rate down is.

Wait patiently for a few more weeks.

Then live my life, as much as I’m allowed, which I predict to be much more than people expect/realise.

Visit my loved ones. Though there are plenty of people not doing many of the things you're saying anyway.

@TwirpingBird

Hate to say it *@gallbladderpain* but kids are being locked away. My toddler hasnt interacted with another child in god knows how long. She is scared of other kids now and cries if anyone speaks to her. She has been locked away for half her life. My 3 month old hasnt seen anyone except me and DH. She hasnt been indoors anywhere except my house and the GP for jabs. This idea that they have to be indefinitely locked away because kids who are CEV have to be locked away doesnt make sense. Thats essentially raising an entire generation of kids who cant function. Its incredibly damaging and unnecessary.

I go out for a regular walk with a friend who has a 4 month old baby. Can you not do that too? You don't need to worry about small children counting towards the two people who are allowed to meet outside for exercise.

And she has bubbled with her in-laws. Can you find someone to bubble with as you have a baby under a year old?

It seems that some people are restricting themselves more than they have to. So you can't meet family indoors. But you can meet outdoors, so wrap up warm and walk in pairs. Next time you can swap round (this assumes you live close enough to each other to meet for a walk).

Hate to say it gallbladderpain but kids are being locked away. My toddler hasnt interacted with another child in god knows how long. She is scared of other kids now and cries if anyone speaks to her. She has been locked away for half her life. My 3 month old hasnt seen anyone except me and DH. She hasnt been indoors anywhere except my house and the GP for jabs. This idea that they have to be indefinitely locked away because kids who are CEV have to be locked away doesnt make sense. Thats essentially raising an entire generation of kids who cant function. Its incredibly damaging and unnecessary

This is why we started breaking the guidelines back in the November lockdown. DD3 is an only child, and there is no way I would risk harm to her development by keeping her away from her peers long term. We’ve been having play dates with a couple of like-minded neighbours - mainly outdoors but inside when the weather has necessitated it. I’m an ex teacher and have Early Years experience and a good grounding in child development and psychology - in some ways I’m actually more concerned about lockdown’s developmental damage to toddlers and preschoolers than I am about loss of formal education in older kids. I think we’re storing up some major problems for ourselves in this area.

We’ve also started brief indoor visits to my elderly parents’ now they’ve both been vaccinated (DF fully and DM partly). At their age I wasn’t going to countenance keeping their only grandchild away from them indefinitely either.

And we’ve been having a single friend over for dinner semi-regularly since the autumn - he lives alone, is WFH and would otherwise have very little social contact. He was really struggling with his MH before Christmas and I’m really glad we’re able to support him at this time and prevent him from doing any damage to himself, which I suspect would otherwise be a very real risk.

Re civil unrest, I’m far too staid and middle aged to consider any rioting nowadays, but I’d definitely join any peaceful protests or mass civil disobedience if things didn’t change considerably for children and young people by the spring, once the vulnerable groups are vaccinated.

To address your follow-up responses:

I have discovered throughout this pandemic that my empathy is a finite resource.

This "people are going to die!" deal stopped making me feel anything around about late summer 2020. It's like a button that got pushed too much and now it is broken. I simply don't care anymore. I can't shoulder the burden of everyone else's health for the forseeable. It's a ridiculous demand to put on people, especially people who were suffering beforehand.

Yes, I know people are dying and suffering and gasping for breath and the NHS is crippled and nurses PTSD... Ultimately though, if my own suffering starts to cut too deeply to the point I'm sacrificing my own health and life, I am at some point going to do what I need to do to keep sane. For me, that is resolved by being close to the people I love.

I don't think there will be civil unrest but mass disobedience. There already is to be honest and I'll admit I am part of it. We live in a 'naice' smart middle class area and people I know are already having friends round, sleepovers etc (in my experience often HCP including doctors who have been vaccinated). If they won't follow the rules then why should I. I have had both my parents (vaccinated) round and my sister (vaccinated due to profession). I regularly meet friends in the park and our kids play. Until Feb I have followed all the rules but I'm not now. I am wfh, distancing, hand washing. DH and I have had the vaccine, our kids go to school as both key workers. I am not doing it any more. Life is 100000 x more pleasurable now I am seeing family. Judge me all you like. 'If you carry on like this it'll go on longer' yep don't care I'm seeing people so don't give a crap really.

@faerin

To address your follow-up responses:

I have discovered throughout this pandemic that my empathy is a finite resource.

This "people are going to die!" deal stopped making me feel anything around about late summer 2020. It's like a button that got pushed too much and now it is broken. I simply don't care anymore. I can't shoulder the burden of everyone else's health for the forseeable. It's a ridiculous demand to put on people, especially people who were suffering beforehand.

Yes, I know people are dying and suffering and gasping for breath and the NHS is crippled and nurses PTSD... Ultimately though, if my own suffering starts to cut too deeply to the point I'm sacrificing my own health and life, I am at some point going to do what I need to do to keep sane. For me, that is resolved by being close to the people I love.

@faerin spot on !

I would happily join a protest, the issue is they are all lead by hardline ultra-left- or -right wingers or conspiracy theorists no one wants to be associated with.

I've been lucky in that I made a choice to move in with my parents and adult siblings in lockdown 1, we then switched to my in-laws for much of the summer, then I was away on an educational course in lockdown 2. So I've been a lot less bored and socially isolated than many, although now I'm back living just with DH. We all made the decision at the beginning to carry on seeing my elderly grandmother, she moved in with us for lockdown 1 but other family members also visited (at a distance). She is late 90s but still a joy to be with so no way were we going to restrict her contact with family in her final years - she'd much rather go with Covid than dementia/cancer etc. We also had a relative die recently at a very young age and his parents were so happy that they'd also carried on seeing family during his illness in what was to be his last year of life. And not a single member of our extended family has had covid.

I'd kill to go to the pub but in terms of what exactly I would do differently, considering I'm already somewhat breaking the rules in seeing my parents at a distance - have friends over for dinner parties/drinks; have friends stay the night (we moved far away recently); see family without social distancing; barbecues once the weather improves etc. This is why I'm so angry the pubs and restaurants likely won't open soon or with no restrictions as people will be or already are doing this anyway, so what is the point in destroying huge parts of an important sector with restrictions? If half our pubs close we are losing a huge part of our culture forever.

What a weird post OP

This!! This attitude is rooted in a basic human trait; we dont actually have the ability to take on the suffering of everyone. We know it exists, but we are wired to primarily care about ourselves. If we were supposed to really care about eveyones suffering we wouldnt function. It's just basic survival. And that is why this strategy of 'keep going keep going' wont work much longer. At some point, our own misery will win out, even if our misery is less than others

OpheliasCrayon

What a weird post OP

I know, right?

So ..... because your kid is CEV and miserable, everyone elses kids must also be miserable, so its 'fair'.

Sorry. I understand you are angry and fed up, but that's illogical, and wishing your misery on others so we are all equally as miserable is a sad thing.

I couldn't agree more and I had a child who was CEV (later passed away of secondary infection). At no point did I expect hte rest of the world to cloister itself away because of that. One of my children has SN and this has caused him and us untold grief.

I have a parent who died from Covid. We were unable to go to the funeral, nor was my h able to go to his parent's.

Both of them said this was no way to go through life. It isn't .

@TwirpingBird

This!! This attitude is rooted in a basic human trait; we dont actually have the ability to take on the suffering of everyone. We know it exists, but we are wired to primarily care about ourselves. If we were supposed to really care about eveyones suffering we wouldnt function. It's just basic survival. And that is why this strategy of 'keep going keep going' wont work much longer. At some point, our own misery will win out, even if our misery is less than others

That was to @Faerin by the way

I'd kill to go to the pub

Gosh.
I was only thinking in terms of waving placards

@LaMarschallin

To the people who are saying they won't stand this any longer:

What exactly do you plan to do?

March on the streets?

Run out of your house and hug your family?

Not wear masks?

Because you can't go to the cinema, theatre, festivals, shops, libraries, cafes, pubs, send your children to school, see beauticians etc without the government's say so.

I'm just interested to know what the alternative is to trying to keep the infection rate down is.

See friends family Drive to go for a walk Protest ie marches

I’ll be seeing my parents once they’re vaccinated and will take their grandchildren if they are happy for me to do so. I’ll also be seeing friends indoors as long as they’re comfortable with that. Other than that, there’s not much else on offer apart from the usual walks etc. Really hoping schools start to include more year groups in their return strategy and that gyms/pools reopen before the summer. Most of our favourite restaurants and offering a delivery service so we will continue to support them.

@LaMarschallin

Shodan

Civil unrest is always a possibility OP, you must know that.

Must I?

Oh, yes - that'll be why I mentioned marching on the streets, I suppose

Then what happens?

The DFS sale will start again.

God I miss those adverts!! 😭

See family and friends outside and at home. Let my kids play with friends again in the warm and dry.

PhilCornwall1

I imagine people will see friends / family . Having bbq s and drinks . Let kids have friends to play

Mostly what others have said:
-meet friends outside in our gardens and any other nice places (NT, the beach, the park) and let the children play together
-go into family’s homes for coffee and lunch

• go camping (wild camping if campsites not open)

-drive to almost wherever I darn well want to do the above.

I strictly abided by the rules through the first Lockdown - this one, I have 80% abided but DD18 goes to boyfriend’s every Friday-Saturday (she’s had Covid, had a vaccine and is tested 3 times a week in her place of work - her boyf is also tested at work) - I desperately want to go abroad but probably won’t and I also can’t wait to have meals out and a bloody haircut!!! I am at home with 2 children and my oldest and my Mum are in our support bubble. I have worked with Covid throughout the whole sodding pandemic - I am recovered, vaccinated and tested regularly but a sizeable number of colleagues have long Covid which is shit.

I do think that many people have tweaked the rules to make life for them and those around them a bit more bearable - the risks are everywhere but it is simply unrealistic to expect every individual to behave impeccably right now.

DD14’s best mate has been here today cooking and messing around - probably should not have allowed it but it has done wonders for DD14’s wellbeing. Shoot me.

@MadameTuffington I think the mental health risks of lockdown have to be weighed up with children. I wouldn’t judge you for that 💐

I think children are suffering . Closing schools is pointless most children near me are meeting up . People can’t handle it any longer . My neighbour told me her daughter has a friend round and explained her daughter 15 had started self harming . We aren’t designed to live in isolation

@gallbladderpain I understand this is very difficult for you , but you can’t honestly expect every child to stay in .