I'm sick of running the 24hr "Corona Cafe" !

[Pebbles574]

DH and two young adult DSs at home and I am just TOTALLY fed up with all the food shopping (online), delivery & putting away, stocking, checking and constantly restocking the fridge, freezer and larder and the ENDLESS meals, snacks, cups of tea and coffee etc etc.

We take it in turns to cook dinner, but the mental load is still mine ("what shall I cook"/ "I don't know what to make"/ "how do a defrost XYZ" etc).

Also, I have a food intolerance which means that I can't eat a lot of ready meal type food (including soups and pasta sauces) so I tend to make stuff from scratch for me. But I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO DOES THIS!
So for example today I made a huge batch of bacon, tomato and lentil soup which I thought would see me well into next week for lunches.
I said there was a small bowl each for lunch today, but to leave the rest to cool.
Then I came downstairs to find them all having massive bowls and seconds, emptying the pan and finishing off the loaf of bread which only just arrived this morning!

And it’s a constant round of nagging to get people to load and empty the dishwasher, and anything that needs handwashing just gets left on the side.

I really am totally fed up!

Anyone else want to rant too?

@BIWI - he knows we would normally have one main type of protein for a meal, and two packs of prawns would be destined for a different one. He said he planned to cook the salmon for dinner and I said "great!" but I didn't see the prawns until he was serving up.

See the prawns thing is exactly the kind of thing I mean. It's good that the DS cooks, but someone who is not used to doing all the budgeting and planning may just not see the bigger picture and that adding anything you fancy when you're cooking will have an impact down the line. They have to learn that of course, and will eventually, but it's the kind of thing that means as the one who does know all this stuff, there's extra work, or having to nag or explain, or pre-empt, and it adds stress. Not major stress obv in any given example, but it's the continual having to be on top of it.

There's a great short story by Fay Weldon about this, it's called Weekend. It's about a woman trying to work, organise a family weekend away and deal with her smug husband and his smug friend who brings his new younger woman to stay. It's the new girlfriend who uses up the ingredients and fucks up the meal plan. Everyone praises her for her fabulous cooking and blames the mum when there then isn't enough food for the weekend. I recommend it, it's a brilliant examination of "wifework" and entitlement.

FWIW I pre-empt, when my DS cooks I always say "use up XYZ, don't open ABC it's for tomorrow". But then that's kind of micromanaging.

So what did you say @Pebbles574?! What were the consequences for him?

We have the meal plan on the fridge, one of those week plan pads. So by the time they are mid teenagers, I would expect the dc to be able to look at the fridge and go yay prawns then look at meal plan and go prawn pasta tomorrow? That’s probably the prawns then.
If they want to switch it around they can ask us but they won’t need to check with us for any major protein item.

I just said "oh no, why have you used the prawns as well, they were meant for later in the week!" and he said "oh sorry, I just didn't think there would be enough food" and I pointed out that he could have added more veg or chickpeas or something, and I asked him and DS2 to guess how much the salmon and prawns together would have cost (about £20) and they were a bit shocked. There were no 'consequences' because we're all adults and it was a genuine mistake/ not really thinking about it thing. If he keeps doing similar then maybe I will get more angry next time?

@HerselfIndoors - I agree, it all just adds to the work that someone has to do to keep things running smoothly. I'd add to the list things like checking Use By dates and planning meals to use stuff in date order, or freezing short-dated meat. But then, of course, someone needs to remember to get it out to defrost again before wanting it for a meal!
I can't stand food waste, so we already have a "eat this first" part of the fridge for lunch type foods/ snacks etc otherwise we'd end up with 4 different packs of cold meats open at the same time, all going out of code .

@Pebbles574

DS (21) is also obsessed with having to have hot food at lunchtime - hates cold sandwiches - so there is always the smell of cooking/ frying etc. Also I've noticed DS2 (18) takes a lead from DS1, so whereas he would normally be happy with some fruit and a toastie and yoghurt, he's now joining forces with his brother and they're making vats of pasta or foraging in the freezer for pizzas/ breaded chicken and chips etc.

It honestly makes me feel quite sick to watch them!

Sorry I had to laugh 😆 I just had a vision of your kitchen being like one from a Cruise ship buffet at lunch time and you watching side eyeing😒 them 😂

Hot lunches 😆 hehe