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Original poster

Is everyone still following the rules?

165 replies

doireallyneedaname · 05/02/2021 15:53

We have been since March. Over the top, my partner would say. Nobody we know has been, apart from the odd CEV friend.

I’m at the end of my tether though. Partner wants one year old to be able to see the family. I have refused for months, and before that it was the odd fleeting visit outside. He says we are the danger to his parents, not them to us - but in reality we don’t see anyone or do anything and they are still working etc, so despite their age - we are not the danger.

Still, I’m tempted to visit. I just don’t know anymore.

Is anyone following the rules 100%? I should add I have stuck to them for fear of Covid, but again I’m told I’m overly cautious being in my early 30’s.

OP posts:
Derbee · 06/02/2021 08:32

Sorry @LilyPond2 quotes the wrong person, small screen on my phone! Meant to quote OP

TimeForLunch · 06/02/2021 08:32

I am following the rules that I have to, eg. Not going to places that are shut, obviously, but otherwise no. We've had Covid in our household (just one of us - the rest did not catch it despite being practically immersed in it by positive child!) so for whatever reason it looks like we are not likely to catch it and therefore cannot pass it on.
We have given up far too many freedoms for this.

squashyhat · 06/02/2021 08:34

Yes. It's fairly easy because there's just the two of us and we're retired but everyone we know including young families are staying as safe as they can.

Derbee · 06/02/2021 08:36

@doireallyneedaname

I wouldn’t say I’m “happy” - I am suffering because of my choices, but I don’t think my baby is in the slightest.
I suspect your baby is suffering but you just can’t see it. Your DP should overrule you, and take your baby to see his parents. I would if I were him. At a certain point, the paranoia and over anxiety about Covid becomes a bit ridiculous
TheKeatingFive · 06/02/2021 08:39

Nope. I’m not isolating my six year old from his peers, that’s actual cruelty in my eyes.

I’m going into work very occasionally, though it’s not strictly necessary. The set up there is so good though, that I struggle to see the risk. I had a whole floor of a large building to myself the last time I was in.

My shopping has veered outside strictly essential also.

HUCKMUCK · 06/02/2021 08:43

We are pretty much. DH only goes out to work, I am wfh and have a DS15.

Our DD lives a mile away and we saw her at Christmas. I can see her if we both book the same shift at our vaccination hub!

MIL is in our bubble and we see her once a week. Haven’t seen my DPs since Christmas. Haven’t seen my Best Friend since October.

I am totally sick of it but won’t be breaking the rules.

TheKeatingFive · 06/02/2021 08:43

Babies learn so much from observing faces. I do ponder, occasionally, what the impact of much more limited exposure to them will have on the infants born during this.

Tyranttoddler · 06/02/2021 08:47

I personally think you're too cautious and you could definitely meet someone for a walk outside. You made a thread about whofollows the rules but you don't actually know what the rules are. You've made yourself more rules because you're afraid, I think. If that helps you, then keep going as you are, but if you're suffering as you say, I would seriously consider changing things a little.

Afishcalledwonderful · 06/02/2021 08:48

Yes I am and have got used to it now. My Dad (on his own) has bubbled with me and my DS6. I've been working from home since March. I really miss my friends and old life though as I was always out and about and doing stuff. Good times will return; hold on to that hope.

ChocOrange1 · 06/02/2021 09:04

I agree with previous poster. If I was your husband I would have taken the baby to visit my parents. Its within the rules, it's small risk, and it would be worth it

ChocOrange1 · 06/02/2021 09:15

As it goes, my family have all commented on how lively and happy my baby is in comparison to how my now grown up relatives were at the same age.
a) How would they know if they've never met him?
b) the effects of no socialisation wouldnt necessarily be present now, but might manifest later in life for example being very scared of "strangers" when he is eventually allowed to see them
c) comparisons to babies from 20+ years ago are likely to be pretty unreliable.

Original poster
doireallyneedaname · 06/02/2021 09:25

We call my family every day and they see each other via FaceTime.

OP posts:
pourmeanotherglass · 06/02/2021 09:50

Mostly following still. I go out to work (NHS) and havent met up with family and friends etc.
I may have been out twice in one day for exercise ( run on my own and walk with dd) which is possibly not allowed but fairly low risk.
When the teens were at school they probably broke them by walking home with more than one friend a few times - its hard not to if you come out at the same time and walk in the same direction but not strictly allowed.

ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 06/02/2021 11:18

I've totally kept the rules up to now, but I'm approaching the point of saying "fuck it". I'm pregnant, and have an almost 2 year old, and I'm so lonely and low... I'd feel much better if there was hope lockdown would lift soon, but all the doom and gloom of new variants and peak deaths makes me feel like nothing will change anytime soon.

We don't need a childcare bubble, and my 1 year old is too old for a baby support bubble, but I'm very tempted to use the "childcare bubble" excuse to see my parents.

DenisetheMenace · 06/02/2021 11:21

We are as are wider family and close friends. Will continue to do so.

LucilleTheVampireBat · 06/02/2021 11:38

No. We aren't.

Watsername · 06/02/2021 11:48

Yes, we are keeping to the rules rigidly.

TinaYouFatLard · 06/02/2021 11:53

Nope. I don’t know anyone who is still following them 100%.

I’d be concerned about your baby’s social development if they literally see nobody other than you and your DH.

TinaYouFatLard · 06/02/2021 12:48

I see you’ve become defensive about the damage being done to your baby. I think your husband needs to grow a pair and overrule you. You are being way OTT. The risk to you of getting seriously ill with Covid is so small as to be negligible.

Honestly, I am much more afraid of the way in which so many people have rolled over and relinquished basic human rights/needs with not so much as a question. That truly is terrifying.

Shelovesamystery · 06/02/2021 12:58

Threads like these make me realise what the msm's doom mongering has done to us.

OP you are in your early 30s FGS. What about falling down the stairs and breaking your neck? Being involved in an RTA? Do you just never go up/down stairs and never leave your house in normal times? No, because the benefits outweigh the risks. You have decided that the risk of covid outweighs the benefits of your baby interacting with people other than you or your DH. But that is madness, it most certainly doesn't. Your DH needs to take that baby out for a walk with his parents.

If there is one thing that I have been eternally grateful for throughout this pandemic it is that my DH and I are very much on the same wavelength when it comes to covid. I haven't stopped him doing anything (within the rules or not) and he hasn't stopped me. I think if he was unnecessarily scared of covid and trying to tell me what to do then our marriage would be in tatters tbh.

PatchworkElmer · 06/02/2021 12:58

Yes, we are. If I had a baby we would’ve formed a bubble though, no question. If you’re worried about bubbling with your ILs, is there anyone else (people wfh) that you could bubble with?

Shelovesamystery · 06/02/2021 13:02

Honestly, I am much more afraid of the way in which so many people have rolled over and relinquished basic human rights/needs with not so much as a question. That truly is terrifying

God yes to this! It's insane Confused

ShinyGreenElephant · 06/02/2021 13:06

We are about 90%. I'm meeting my mum in the park weekly with both kids - 1 is a toddler and doesnt count but the other does so were 1 person over there. I also suspect that when DD goes for walks with friends its not always 1 at a time but I turn a blind eye to that as shes bloody miserable and they're outdoors the whole time.

Weve all had covid though and so have all my close family so that does make me less anxious. I wouldnt just do what I want as I'm aware I could potentially still pass it on, but I have to admit that its made me much less panicky about these minor rule breaks.

ScrumpyBetty · 06/02/2021 13:44

We go to local park two or three times a week and sometimes bump into other mums/dads and children that we know. The children play together and I talk to the other parents at a distance. It feels very safe and it's a lovely bit of normality and important social contact for us.

carcarbinks · 06/02/2021 14:06

We're following the rules and friends and family seem to mostly be doing the same with some stretches. One of my friends works outside the home and says other people don't socially distance at work but it is mostly outside. Another friend goes cycling with a friend and they stop for a takeaway coffee and chat.

When I go into town I notice it's busy, people not wearing masks, shopping as a family etc. Cases in some areas near me are still going up and someone said our schools may not open on 8 March as a result.