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Covid

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Original poster

Would you take your elderly mum to Sainsbury's

870 replies

Icequeen01 · 12/01/2021 18:15

So I'm in such a quandary about this. My DM who is 81 has had both her jabs. She hasn't been out for weeks and weeks and I do her shopping each week when I do mine. She has told me she is coming with me to Sainsbury's next week as it will then be over a week since her booster. She knows she has to wear a mask, hand sanitise and socially distance etc.

I'm still not comfortable with taking her though. I've explained that they don't know if she can still transmit the virus but this is something she desperately wants to do, just to have a little bit of normality again and to be able to do her own shopping. She was very upset when I suggested she shouldn't come.

What would you do?

OP posts:

Babyroobs · 12/01/2021 20:06

No the vaccine does not prevent people catching covid, it just reduces the severity of the illness. I still wouldn't risk it with numbers of cases as they are at the moment.

MrsMiaWallis · 12/01/2021 20:06

@C8H10N4O2

The rules are Sainsbury's rules!

I seem to have missed the Sainsbury's rule which says single adults from seperate households can't share transport.

That's probably an actual rule isn't it, unless they are in a support bubble.

Quaagars · 12/01/2021 20:06

Both adults will be doing their own shopping. She wants to do her own shopping. Its not a little day trip!

This!
You say she's had both her jabs, she desperately wants to go out and do her own shopping when you go, why are people saying no they wouldn't take her with them?!
She's an adult capable of making her own decisions, and she's been vaccinated.
It's not all about the 'rona, (as awful as it is) maybe she just wants to get out for a bit of fresh air and a feeling of "normality" which is just as important.

81Byerley · 12/01/2021 20:06

We're in lockdown, so it doesn't matter that she's had her vaccines. She should stay home. I understand how she feels, I haven't been to a supermarket since March 14th. But it isn't a necessary trip, since you can do her shopping, so you should say no.

middleager · 12/01/2021 20:06

No. As pp says, if everybody does this it pushes the rest of us closer together and makes standing in queues even longer.

GoudaGirl · 12/01/2021 20:08

No. She wont be fully protected yet and she might be a transmission risk to others.

knittingaddict · 12/01/2021 20:08

My parents shop in Sainsburys together.

halfeatenhamper · 12/01/2021 20:09

@MrsMiaWallis

Which rules

The rules that say one adult only in the supermarket. Imagine I'm speaking very slowly.

What, to match your thinking speed?

Robbybobtail · 12/01/2021 20:10

My 82 yo extremely vulnerable uncle has been going to the shops throughout - wearing a mask and social distancing obvs. It has helped him remain quite cheery to get out. It’s torturous to keep our elderly locked up - if she’s had both jabs then yes she will be fine.

As for those saying it’s against the rules - it is NOT against guidelines to basically give another family member a lift to the shops which is what op would be doing. They don’t live together - guidelines are one adult from each household to shop.

Quaagars · 12/01/2021 20:11

We're in lockdown, so it doesn't matter that she's had her vaccines. She should stay home

Why? There's no rules to say you're not allowed to go food shopping!
Or is it just because she's just gone 80 she's automatically deemed too doddery and should stay at home?
There's plenty of other 80s who are still fit and healthy and capable of going shopping.

MrsMiaWallis · 12/01/2021 20:11

@C8H10N4O2

The rules are Sainsbury's rules!

I seem to have missed the Sainsbury's rule which says single adults from seperate households can't share transport.

It's a government rule : Car sharing is not permitted with anyone from outside your household or support bubble of course OP and her mum might have bubbled

Handcarthell · 12/01/2021 20:11

@knittingaddict

My parents shop in Sainsburys together.

Hopefully Sainsbury's will stop this along with them enforcing mask wearing

saraclara · 12/01/2021 20:11

@Iminaglasscaseofemotion

Yes I would take her. She is an adult, she can make her own decisions. I would be fucking pissed off if my child told me at 81 I couldn't go to the shops.

Absolutely that.

FFS, Covid has made the infantilisation of older people even worse.

PLEASE stop doing this, MNers. Your parents are adults capable of their own decisions. Don't control them by depriving them of the means to carry them out.

Jeeeze I'm dreading getting properly old. That my kids might see me as a toddler whose they get to make decisions for scares me to death.

doubleshotespresso · 12/01/2021 20:12

DemolitionBarbie · 12/01/2021 20:12

On balance I'd say you should take her, your basically providing a taxi service.

I am worried that older people will get vaccinated and expect the world to immediately revert to normal, despite the risk to others.

Looneytune253 · 12/01/2021 20:12

No, shielding people are back shielding again. Assuming she is because of her age (I know it's not usually down to age but at 81 I would think it would be sensible)

saraclara · 12/01/2021 20:14

@GoudaGirl

No. She wont be fully protected yet and she might be a transmission risk to others.

Why? What makes her more of a transmission risk than anyone else? You don't get to be more of a spreader of Covid the older you get. She'll be less of a risk than you are. She's been stuck at home forever AND she's had her vaccines.

Bloody hell. Seriously, You're turning old people into something other than normal human beings.

charliespie · 12/01/2021 20:14

No, shielding people are back shielding again. Assuming she is because of her age

Nobody was ever on the shielding list based on their age. Nobody.

TheKeatingFive · 12/01/2021 20:14

I would.

The whole point of these lockdowns was to protect people like your mum. Now that the vaccine is doing that, I’m sure a bit of normality would be hugely welcome. The shielded have suffered a lot since March, isolation isn’t good for anyone.

There are people on here who won’t be happy until every last person on the planet has the jab, but meanwhile, back in the real world.

WaxOnFeckOff · 12/01/2021 20:14

Yes OP, I'd take her in a heart beat. Who know how long any of us have and the young and elderly have been disproportionately affected by all this. You could get the bulk of her stuff in your trolley and let her look about to see if there is anything different she fancies.

MrsMiaWallis · 12/01/2021 20:15

On balance I'd say you should take her, your basically providing a taxi service

Which you aren't allowed to do during lockdown.

WingingWonder · 12/01/2021 20:15

NO
And also- the staff won’t appreciate you being in a pair

saraclara · 12/01/2021 20:16

@Looneytune253

No, shielding people are back shielding again. Assuming she is because of her age (I know it's not usually down to age but at 81 I would think it would be sensible)

Who said she's shielding? Old people don't have to shield if they've no health issues.

Seriously, I'm appalled at people's attitudes and ignorance on this thread

rhowton · 12/01/2021 20:16

Oh for fucks sake!! She is an ADULT. She literally grew you and pushed you out of her vagina!! If she fancies coming to Sainsbury's, you bloody well take her!! She's even had her vaccine!! Come on now!!

charliespie · 12/01/2021 20:16

@Icequeen01

Can you clarify if you are in a supper bubble thing before the idea of driving your mum to the supermarket causes major meltdown

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