Do you judge people for 'minor' rule breaks?

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So ten months into a pandemic- whether you agree with the harshness of the rules or not- I think most people would agree that the average person is likely to struggle with lockdown fatigue and wavering compliance.

So my question is, do you judge people for minor rule breaks? ie:

• someone seeing their partner who lives in another household, indoors (whether this be for mental health, or the fact most adult romantic relationships require physical contact)
• parents visiting uni students in halls
• grown adults visiting elderly parents who are lonely and isolated

If you think about it, if you live in some places up North, it's been illegal to see your partner who you don't live with for six months, providing you're not in a support bubble. And I know you can see people outdoors, but that's not conducive to a normal relationship. Or, in the case of the elderly, not healthy or comfortable.

So would you judge people for the above rule breaks, if it was genuinely they only tine they mixed with another household? And there is no support bubble?

This thread is mostly pointless, however I am simply wondering if anyone else is finding it hard now!

The above scenarios are all ones I know people in real life have done and I do not judge them. Apart from that, they wear masks, limit contact and mostly WFH.

I tend to not notice what other people are doing.

Anyway I have done a couple of minor breaches - 9 of us instead of 6 outdoors and we had a neighbour in the house when MIL was very unwell. If anyone judged the second one quite frankly they would be a twat of the highest order.

I really don’t pay attention to what other people are doing.

I’d fully support people seeing partners

I don't care & I know of very little possible rule-breaking anyway.

I am slightly fascinated by people who only know rule-breakers, and whose social media is full of flagrant rule-breaking. This gets complained about loudly by same people who obviously mind very much. In contrast, maybe nobody trusts me, even though I don't care at all!

Yes. The rules are clear and its selfish to break them.

My friend had her parents over on Christmas Day - all fine. Pics on social media of them all together after the rule change on boxing Day, outdoors, but hugging!

I obey the rules but tif they said uni students couldn’t come home I would have broken them.

It depends.

Young person visiting elderly family from a city of high prevalence and staying overnight I have judged harshly this last week.
Then I've backed off thinking they are all adults.

People meeting their partners who are both in low risk groups I think is totally understandable as it's gone beyond a short lockdown.

Luckily in Scotland there's an exemption for non cohabiting partners to meet up indoors, even in level 4 areas. I don't know if there's an equivalent in England, Wales or N Ireland. 'Extended Household'.

That's sensible Lizzie.

No I don’t judge people for breaking the rules in the type of way you mentioned.

Massive house parties...yes I’ll judge.

I agree with what you are saying. Leicester has never been out of lockdown so in theory nobody whose not living with their dp should have seen them indoors so no I do not judge those in established relationships seeing their dp, and I'm seeing my university student dc indoors, and they are also seeing their dad indoors (separated). I have dp's dc staying with us (also young adults)

We have a severely disabled teenager and have in effect formed a bubble with a family member who is our only social contact but are not allowed one officially because they have a partner. Some might call it giving care and support or some might call it breaking the rules. Quite frankly I am past caring.

I wouldn't judge someone for seeing their partner or having an extra friend over, it's probably necessary for their mental health. I think it's very easy for people who don't leave alone to judge those who do, as we crave a little human contact from time to time. I was on my own, in a new country for most of the spring and autumn lockdowns and I soooo needed to see my friends. I've hugged many people since summer. My parents didn't understand but there's 4 of them at home so they get plenty of social interaction.

I do judge those who choose to make up excuses for constantly meeting in big groups, wearing their masks on their chins, ignoring all social distancing. There's a difference between taking care of yourself so you're not completely isolated for months, and thinking you're above the rules and that none of them apply to you.

• live alone, not leave

I just don't have the mental energy to judge, let alone think, about what anyone else is doing.

How do people have that kind of spare space in their head to actually bother about what other people do?

I lost my mum to covid a few weeks ago, my SIL currently has covid, a routine test last week came back positive and 3 days ago symptoms started, she called an ambulance tonight.

Both of them followed the rules and caught covid in hospital/the care home she works in. If one person further back in the chain of transmission had made a different decision, done the right thing , not stretched the rules maybe my mum would still be here and maybe my SIL and 6 of her care home residents would not be seriously ill. Yes, I'll judge those who intentially break the rules.

@WeAllHaveWings

Glad to hear you doing that.
You are right the cumulative effects of little breaks is exactly what you describe.
My partner is my support bubble so we are never fully alone.
People have to handle that.
If you have very older parents or relatives care is also excluded. But people need to weigh that with the risk they might transmit to them.

It’s all the inter house inside mixing and parties that are the issue.

No I don't judge other people
In fact I don't really pay attention to what other people do

I never judge people for minor infractions. I massively judge the self appointed Covid police.

I do judge those that have parties my neighbour on Christmas Eve and those that put pictures all over SM of them breaking rules but they clearly don't give a shit so judgement is pointless. They are the same ones baying (on my SM) for the schools to close but you can't argue with stupid so I don't.

I don't judge those that need extra support, have caring needs or want to see partners.

I used to get wound up about rule breaking but its not worth the energy. My children are safe and healthy, their education hasn't suffered (thanks to their excellent schools and teachers) and I've stuck to and will continue to stick to guidelines. What everyone else does is their look out. Noone else cares about anyone else so if you can't beat em, join em. Its quite liberating.

Anyone who likes to judge and shout "selfish!!", come and camp out in my street, you'd have a lovely time. 4 properties that I can see have multiple people staying over, I'm sure there are more around.

You could bang on all the doors and have a go at them.

Dépends how minor and whether there is any risk involved.
Thé uni halls one is a significant risk

I dont judge when people break rules that have no impact on the virus, e.g. seeing family in the garden, rather than in a public park, or (if living in remote area) going for a walk when self isolating as a contact. But I do judge if rules are broken that increase the risk of virus transmission.

I do judge those who choose to make up excuses for constantly meeting in big groups, wearing their masks on their chins, ignoring all social distancing. There's a difference between taking care of yourself so you're not completely isolated for months, and thinking you're above the rules and that none of them apply to you

Yes. I've probably got neighbours twitching their curtains now because my mum is staying with us. She lives alone and isn't in a support bubble with anyone else, she usually just sees people outside. So it's within the rules, although some MNers would moan about it being a "new" bubble for Christmas. Whatever.

Some minor rule breaks were less risky (in that particular circumstance) than things that were allowed under the rules (eg when six adults from six different households were allowed to meet, but not two households adding up to seven people in total). I don't judge people for minor rule breaking.

the average person is likely to struggle with lockdown fatigue and wavering compliance

I think we are all struggling with lockdown fatigue, but only some struggle with wavering compliance.

On the whole I don't know what other people are doing, so there is nothing for me to judge. Where I am aware of 'rule-breaking' I do view breaking the rules without good reason negatively, but most of the time I wouldn't know and I don't assume the worst of people.

Context is everything, so visiting your student child at uni could be essential or unnecessary.

I'm not struggling with complying myself, even though I am sick to the back teeth of it all, because I like to go to bed knowing I did what I could.