I’m on CPAP - please help me survive hell

[LittleSpyintheSky]

I’m on CPAP. Everyone is doing their best to keep me alive but I feel traumatised. Family and friends are still asleep. Is anyone there to talk to me?

I came on to say my blood pressure is up due to feeling so anxious but OMG lupinhere37 😂😂😂😂. Brilliant story brilliantly told.

I waited for the paperback version as my wrists can’t take the weight of the hardback.

To you and all the other lovely ladies 💐💐💐💐💐

Hang on in there it must be exhausting, claustrophobic and scary. Hoping that you can manage to come off the machine today and get some sleep.

Hang on in there. I hope it's a bit easier than last night. Birds are twittering here so at least the night is almost over and that's the worst bit!

Oh op. You’re doing really well. I know how frightened you must be but you’ve got this and you CAN do it.
Years ago I used to be a nurse. Bit out of practice now but I remembered the “small hours” as always being the worst for my anxious patients. Same for me if I’m ever worried.
I used to get them (and do it myself too) to just focus on small, manageable chunks of time, when they really couldn’t sleep. Think of things to occupy your mind for 15 minutes, then another 15 minutes ie list ten funny memories from your children’s’ first years at school. Or work out your ten most favourite Christmas presents of all time. Plan a hypothetical, detailed menu for a fortnight (pure fantasy in my case as I’d be too scared to try and cook half of it and frankly too lazy to follow the recipe),mentally re-decorate each room in your house and really focus on the detail. May be worth a try. At worst, if you focus on it, you’ll be distracted and pass some time. At best, you’ll distract yourself enough to all is you to sleep.

Oh....and yes to getting the paperback. The hardback is a beast of a book! Xx

Sending you love OP.

I'm impressed by your strength. Keep going my love.

🌷

Hang in there OP. I was in ITU with Sepsis a few years ago and I remember thinking I would never ever sleep again, but you do and you will.
You’re doing so well! Have you got a stack of shitty magazines? If not, check out the take a break style thread on here, hilarious. X

I’m still here lovely mumsnetters. Soon the lights will go back on and I have breakfast to look forward to and DH to talk to. Demons are receding - be gone!

I have a Readly subscription, kindle, bbc iPlayer. I have plenty but can’t foncentrating. I am loving my music 💐💐💐💐💐

Skyscraper by Demi lavato. I played this a lot when I had TNBC. It’s one of my fighting songs

You're a strong lady who will get through this.
I had a spell in HCU years ago, and can well remember the nights.
All our troubles are worse at night.
But you're closer to getting better my love, you are in the best hands, and your spirit and the wonderful team looking after you will get you through this.
We are all behind you.
Glad your music is helping.

Well done OP - another tough night you've got through. Am reading and hearing you and sound strong to me - doing the things you can to get you through. Hope today is better and news you can come off cpap soon x

You may not be religious but I am. Going to church in the morning and I will remember you in my prayers.

We hear about these statistics on the news and it seems so distant . To actually hear from someone who is struggling and coping with this horrible disease is humbling.

Hope the day brings you some sleep and wishing you peace .

Thank you Sophie andNopink.

Stillfunny- I’m not religious, but I’m very happy for you to pray for me. Thank you with all my heart xx

Well done for fighting your way through the night.

Rise by Katy Perry us a good fighting song

Keep on keeping on! Small goals: breathe calmly for the next track. Close your eyes for the one after. Day will soon be here.

LittleSpyintheSky I hope today is better for you - and that you finally get some sleep.

Thank you everyone 💐💐💐

I wanted to let you know how weak I and the rest of the ladies are. I have to use a commode. They put it two steps from my position in the bed. Getting on it seems impossibly difficult. It always sends me into a coughing fit.

What I don’t understand is the road from here to recovery. I don’t know how much damage has been caused or whether it will be permanent ir not.

It may not feel liked it, but it’s a good sign that you’ve started worrying about what will happen to you in the future rather than worrying about getting there x

Well, what ever the prognosis, the things to help yourself are the same- be kind to yourself, let people look after you, try to relax, take care of yourself.
Must be terrifying, and a timely reminder for those of us sad about plans being changed. Thank you for sharing your story.

Good morning OP.

Just checking in on you. How was your breakfast today?

How was your breakfast LittleSpy?

I just wanted to say that while you are asking for help from mumsnetters you are also helping many of us.

It would be easy for us all right now to be weak and stop following the rules but you are making me personally more determined than ever to keep on. You are giving us strength. We need to hear your story

Just had breakfast. Porridge. Was very good. Feels normal

Take care Littlespy and good morning

And cleaned my teeth for first time since Thursday. I feel almost human ☺️👍🏻

Keep going op!

Good morning blackbearder 💐