How do I stay calm when so many either have coronaphobia or are enjoying lockdown too much?

[awaywiththecircus]

Out for a walk last night and saw a neighbour who’s furloughed. She took pleasure in saying what a great time she’s having and hoping things carry on like this for a lot longer yet. She doesn’t think she should go back to work anytime soon as she has to meet people face to face and she doesn’t want to catch it. She’s in her 30s, slim and white.
Get back and speak to SIL who won’t be sending dnephew to school if they open in June ‘because children are dying too’ I’m getting so annoyed at the attitude of so many stupid people and it’s like banging my head against a brick wall. I feel like I’ve lost all control of my life and it’s going to carry on forever. Does anyone else know what I mean?

awaywiththecircus find the dementor threads. Lots of normal people on there. Things will get back to normal at some point!

Normal? That's a bold claim.

What has being ‘slim and white’ got to do with it?

Do you not watch any news?

@awaywiththecircus. how have you and your family been affected by Coronavirus?

People have different risk factors and tolerances for risk, OP. I fail to see how the examples you mentioned impact you? I'm looking forward to schools reopening and work becoming somewhat less virtual, but it doesn't bother me if people are more cautious.

I'm having an ok time all considered.
Lost my job March 12th, a job I adored. Y whole.industry has imploded.Only seen 4 realistic jobs (not my industry but would.pay the bills) to apply for since and there is even less choice now.
I've lost 2 friends in the past 7 weeks. Could not attend their funerals.
Had my holiday cancelled 14th March as I was at Heathrow airport checking in.
Not seen my shielded Mum 2 hours away since February.
My husband and his lover ignored social distancing for a shag meaning i duscivered his affair, so i kicked him out. Devestating after 25 years especially as he's just moved in with her and not looked back.
I can't see what my future will look like at all. On the whole my entire life has gone tits up.
I worry about bills, money, divorce future etc BUT
I'm spending time with my teens and young adult kids I have a small patios back years to sit in, so far we've remained healthy, I've sorted a load of shit put, got lots of DIY jobs sorted, got to chat to my nwighbours (sd). Its been nice to slow down and just catch up on life. Im grateful that we have our health in our and can have a good time together. I enjoy a cold cider sat in the sun in my garden most sunny afternoon's.
I m grateful because despite how shit things have gone, I'm better off than some.

I get some people are struggling. I've had my heartache , frustrations and tears but I'm not going to waste my energy getting stressed out measuring my shit and good poi t's of my life to others.
I am literally taking it 24hours at a time. No one knows what life will look like in 1 month 3 months 6 months or even 18 months time. I can't stress about it.

"Covid 19 is not scary."

and Donald Trump is an honest genius.

@Nb89 excellent post. Sorry you’ve had such a crap time. You’ve helped me a lot with your post x

I completely understand OP

Try working in a care environment looking after people with covid. Then tell me people are overreacting.
I'm white, slim-ish and early 40s.
I can no longer face going to work.

Well everyone’s different

The nurse and carer friends I have are just as pissed off about lockdown and the nurse very worried about normal nhs services.

Agree lilacTree

My husband treats cancer patients and it’s horrifying what has happened to some of their treatment. I’m genuinely grateful to anyone treating covid patients but they don’t have a monopoly on seeing the distressing consequences of this disease and lockdown.

Covid matters. People who catch it matter. So do others, and we need to work out a way forward that takes all factors into account.

I agree OP.

Every thread about moving forward in anything (particularly schools opening tbh) is met with endless people saying 'can't do that, can't do this, that's won't work' it must be exhausting being so defeatist all the time.

Rooster “My husband treats cancer patients and it’s horrifying what has happened to some of their treatment. I’m genuinely grateful to anyone treating covid patients but they don’t have a monopoly on seeing the distressing consequences of this disease and lockdown. “

Does he feel able to speak out?

I’ve got a friend who has been told - in March - that her next round of treatment won’t be till October. Instead of sitting home watching paint dry, she sits home and listens to cancer grow.

It may not be a furlough bashing thread but the opening post sounds like it could be.
Some relatives of mine are worried about their jobs and had one payment so far ; they want to go to work and work in places that would be open today.
I'm sure a few are enjoying the hot weather etc etc , but they are not. Plus why should t they sit in the garden just because they cannot go to work? Not their fault is it!
Why people lack so much empathy really troubles me!

I am not defeatist. I'm hopeful. I'm hopeful that test track and isolate will help to keep the r0 low in the community. I'm hopeful that more treatment options will become available. I'm hoping that there will be more specificity about who should be shielding. I'm hopeful that immunity will last for a useful amount of time. I'm hopeful that antibody testing might unlock some (my) shielding household. I'm hopeful but I'm not fucking delusional and pretending otherwise while accussing other people of being dementors.

I’m relieved I’m not furloughed ( NHS worker ) or have ‘ corona phobia ‘ and am mentally just fine as still working , being paid , pretty much life as normal really . I feel for those who are dealing with a dramatic change to their routine . Although exposed to Covid we’ve had appropriate PPE . However there’s still a risk of getting it until and even if there is an effective vaccine or treatment . Apart from my job I’m in a low risk group and am pragmatic enough to take the view if I get it I get it and in the unlikely event I die well so be it . Will is up to date and done .

it’s like banging my head against a brick wall

I think you need to take a step back and calm down. Other people are allowed to think/feel what they want-you can’t change that. You can change your reaction to it though.

OP, your neighbour was tactless and I'm sorry she's upset you.

However those of us who have been furloughed, haven't chosen it. I'm getting about 50% of pay so I would much rather be back at work.

It's out of our hands, so making the best of it is reasonable. What's the alternative? Worrying won't help.

I don’t know anyone who has been ill with covid. I live in a county with a low covid death rate and low infection rates. But I am furloughed and when furlough pay ends after June I am not sure what will happen. Because I won’t have a job to go back to until all social distancing is fully lifted, and the company I work for are talking about the possibility of that not being until early - spring 2021.

Covid 19 is not scary. It's a virus that is mild for 80% of the population and even the vast majority of those badly effected will still recover.

Shame for the 30,000 or so that didn't though.

Got no idea why 100 or so countries have been lockdown.

Whatevs @CaliforniaMountainSnake

@awaywiththecircus Suggest you get "news" from other sources than paper like the mail - "coronaphobia" ffs

I’ve known a few healthy younger people get it and been really really ill. One is about 8 weeks in after getting it, still coughing up lung cells, utterly exhausted and frankly, looks like death. They weren’t considered bad enough to be hospitalised.

Thankfully most people don't get it like that, but for a lot it’s really bad.

I’ve utmost sympathies for furloughed people who want to be back at work. But not for furloughed people who don’t want to be back at work and are looking for excuses to stay off. You should be angry at those people who are giving all furloughed a bad name.

But not for furloughed people who don’t want to be back at work and are looking for excuses to stay off.

What illegitimate excuse would they effectively use to extend their furlough if that is contrary to their employer's demands? There isn't one.

It's like being pissed off at people who hope for snow, as if their hoping for it has any bearing on the weather.