Anyone else just lost motivation now ?

[SouthWestmom]

I've just given up. Still in pyjamas, gave up yesterday. Dh is still finding stuff to do and is annoyed at me.

Boys are struggling with online school; I've realised one of them is just lost now - no plan for his health treatment, so behind already with school. I'm sure the others will be ok when this is lifted.

Done all the jobs with the novelty of free time.

Have no enthusiasm to write that book, start yoga, etc.

I know what works but it all seems pointless. Can't see my family, realised people I thought were friends haven't contacted me to check in, starting to feel quite depressed at life generally.

Same. I started my maternity leave 29th Jan and apart from being in hospital for a week having baby in march I have been pretty housebound since then so for me 'lockdown' has been going on for much much longer than many. I'm fed up, I mostly just want my baby to see her family and for things to get back to normal so no start to enjoy my maternity.

Oh Tickle that's hard. I hope your family get to meet baby soon.

Maybe I'll start a movie marathon with ds - work through the Marvel films.

Every little thing seems insurmountable really. I got a benefit payment I don't qualify for (error not fraud!) and it seems impossible to deal with.

I've been up and down. Currently feeling ok luckily. I need routine and things to do as I'll start to get depressed if I sit around watching TV. Things like having a regular zoom call with my friends every Saturday night helps a lot. We have started doing a quiz which is good fun - whoever wins does the one next week. Also have an online games night with the kids and friends on Friday nights. Roast and board games on Sunday evening. Makes it feel like there is more of a weekend. I am still working (part time from home) which helps plus sitting with DS while he does school work. Lack of routine isn't great for my family so all this helps us.

A marvel marathon sounds like a great plan.

@Titsywoo please could you recommend any online games that you can play with friends? We live board games and would live to play with friends but aren't sure where to start.

Glad it's not just me. Hit the wall yesterday. I think it's something to do with going past the six weeks of the school summer holidays.

Yes hitting a wall too

Surely this can’t go on? Miss my boyfriend too much. Also feel such pmt but my period has vanished now too (

So unmotivated here as well. Got so much to do as my house is a tip and two small children.

But I just can’t get motivated and I’m absolutely exhausted

@Mikki2019 same here bloody awful pmt but no period! Just wish it would come and go so I could at least feel a bit less crazy!!

I know this isn't forever but it's not like another couple of weeks and then back to normal.

I'm just feeling tired and fed up and missing normality and all the plans are scuppered. Son is worse and all therapy is delayed or patchy and remote. Other appointments all cancelled.

Just tired and fed up. Sort of glad I'm not alone because this must be quite a normal reaction.

@Littlemiss74 same !!! Exactly the same !!! Have been going to dp for last two weeks - I’ll feel better when get my period !!

@Mikki2019 it’s annoying isn’t it! I just wish it would hurry up and come and go - 7 weeks now since last one. I have been pretty stressed with all this virus stuff going on and my Dad was unwell with it so am putting it down to that & my age! Just feel crap though, stressed, tired and eating crap! Need to stop.

I put it down to my age too

And being apart from dp, really struggling

You need to keep moving... even if it’s the last thing you want to do, go for a run or a brisk walk... crank your headphones up loud. Start every day with a shower and get dressed. You’ll feel so much better for it

I'm still taking the youngest one for a walk it it's the same old route every day (Asd).
I'm just watching the middle one get worse with no end in sight. Yesterday was awful and I just can't see an independent future for him.
It's almost nine and I'm trying to get enthusiasm to wake them all up, get them logged on for school and start work.

I have regular days like this. Although tbh that’s not entirely new (I “burn out” very quickly) but it’s definitely worse now under lockdown as I don’t have things to force me out of the house etc

I’m getting better at just doing one small thing each day when I feel like this like a small workout or sitting on the garden bench and reading a bit in the sun. It doesn’t sort me out completely but I think it stops me deteriorating further.

It just feels endless though doesn’t it? I’m not even new to not working or staying home a lot (health issues) or even to home educating, but without the outside world providing distraction and entertainment and structure for all of us it’s too easy to just stop.

I am also really struggling. Just can’t keep on top of keeping the house tidy with all the kids at home. I thought with us all home these things would be shared, but I still seem to be responsible for all shopping and meal prep and all the tidying. I think people going on about doing jobs around the house doesn’t help as we have no time to do DIY, can barely keeping on top of the washing and the dishwasher!!

I feel like a piece of elastic that has stretched and stretched for weeks and has now broken. Don’t feel as if I will bounce back from this.

That's a really good analogy feeling

It's just the general life work that's exhausting whereas it wasn't before - I get where pp are saying extras aren't happening.

I think the issue is that we are having to live our lives in a way that we didn’t plan to. If we were going to home school the kids, then we wouldn’t both have jobs, we would live in a bigger place outside of London with space available for the kids to have desks, my DH and I to have quiet space to work. It’s having to do all this in a space that wasn’t designed for it which I find so hard. No one can physically get away from each other to concentrate on anything.

"starting to feel quite depressed at life generally."
If you feel you are clinically depressed and not just a bit low, then contact your GP as you may need some help.

"Boys are struggling with online school; I've realised one of them is just lost now - no plan for his health treatment, so behind already with school."
Unless you truly are suffering depression then your DC need you to help them with their schooling. Could you try and help them by perhaps helping out DC for short periods - little and often? Think of how they will feel if they fall behind others.

"I know what works but it all seems pointless."
It isn't pointless though. This time will pass and one day it will become a dim and distant memory. Lockdown has only been just over 6 weeks, not much time in the overall scheme of things. Please try and do what you know works. It will help you, your DC and it will help the time pass.

"Can't see my family, realised people I thought were friends haven't contacted me to check in"
Have you checked in with them? Sometimes we have to take the initiative. Maybe your friends are having a hard time too and are struggling to motivate themselves to contact anyone. Could they be ill or have family who are ill? My ndn died last week. I had no idea they were ill.

I hope you start to overcome how you feel soon.

I am finding mornings the worst. I am still in bed now wondering what the point of getting up is.
I was watching 24 hours in A&E last night. There was a man in there who had clinical depression. He described feeling that there was lots to do ‘but someone had turned the power down’ and that’s how I feel.
I am not clinically depressed though just low mood.

I cried just now simply because DD1’s form tutor phoned up to see how she’s doing and he was really nice. Maybe I’ve pushed myself forward a while and it had to spill out sometime.

I don’t really feel like I can even do one thing at the moment. As I said above I’ve managed that most days but this morning I just can’t. Maybe later. I was meant to be going into town as well which I have actually quite enjoyed (fresh air and time to myself when it’s so quiet) but I don’t even want to do that today

Lane that's nice they are keeping in touch

Black and white I think I'm not being fair in posting about ds in passing - he has very complex needs and there's more than missing this period of school. Without the other specialist input I'm limited in what I can do. I do think his future is pretty bleak tbh.
But you're right and maybe I need to restart the anti depressants on the other things.

It's the motivation that's gone.

On the friends thing, yes - it's just little things like me posting messages to them but never the other way round. I've definitely tried. Its not everyone it's just fine tuned my friendships