The loneliness is becoming less and less bearable

[Maria53]

I live alone and I'm 28 and single. I work from home 9-5 although it's often later these days.

I've binged shows, read books (tho I cant concentrate on them anymore), I'm trying to lose weight and succeeding at least. My cousin had the virus, my friend had it. My gran is in the last stage of dementia and I worry I will never see her again.

I was supposed to go on a date just before lockdown & have been talking to the guy every couple of days since lockdown started. But then I started taking longer to reply and now he hasnt been in touch for 5 days...and I really feel like there's not much to say anymore. I get it but I miss talking to him. But then what's the point when we cant date? I get it if he's fading out.

I just cant bear not seeing my parents. I miss my best friend. This is no quality of life. I'm working just as hard, if not harder, and have a nightmare client who is quite nasty.

I just keep thinking when will I see one single person that I love again? I am really struggling to live like this. I know it's hard for all of us.

Rosesandiris, you said "People from different households are not supposed to mix so only groups of two from the same household". You are correct about people from different households, but you are wrong about only two people from the same household can gather. This from the Gov website... the government has prohibited by law all public gatherings of more than two people, except for very limited purposes: where the gathering is of a group of people who live together in the same household – this means that a parent can, for example, take their children to the shops

Please don't work more than your usual hours. My friend was burning out cos her internal client thought she should be at his beck and call because she lives alone and what else would she be doing in an evening?

I started ringing her in the evening, 15 minutes after her call with the arsehole was supposed to finish to give her an excuse to stop working.

My work is incredibly understanding that this is a difficult time and people juggling work and DC are allowed to take some time during the day to supervise DC and for fairness this applies to everyone without DC too.

I found that not watching/reading the news really helped. As did turning off my phone 60 minutes before going to bed and reading instead.

Yes sorry, that was a slip.

We can see the light at the end of the tunnel now.
What light????

Please tell me, what is this light that people keep going on about? All I can see is lockdown, lockdown, lockdown, the country willingly sleepwalking into an Orwellian society, aided and abetted by the public, a smug BoJo and other clowns in shiny suits, benches and playground equipment taped up, "temporarily closed" all over Google Maps, and whispering about talking about whispering about exit strategy. It reminds me of Humphrey Appleby's comment (Yes Minister) "It's the law of inverse relevance: the less you intend to do about something, the more you have to keep talking about it".

Same here OP- live alone, wfh with even more stress than normal.

I have a cat. She does help to fight off the loneliness slightly, but I seem to cry most days now.

I can’t take this much longer. I miss my mum and haven’t seen my partner in 6 weeks. This solitary confinement is torture

I think a lot of people have reached their limit recently. I live with my DH, two DC and cat, but I'm a gregarious person and although I've been okay so far I'm getting to the point now where I REALLY want to see other people, go out and do something different. Yes, I can survive at home, we have a nice home, a garden, etc, but it's existing at the barest level. I feel your pain OP. Go and get your cat, if you can. Or foster/adopt another if your DM is too attached. I had an email from Cats' Protection today saying they are allowed to accept adoptions again.

Wanderings that’s what I see but I wonder if google maps - which I don’t use - is part of the problem.

Completely relate to your dating situation. I was dating someone before this happened and things were going well. Like your experience, the texts have fizzled out. It is because there is nothing to say! Rest assured, once this is over things will pick up again.

If you’re missing that connection with someone, try dating apps (if you haven’t already) and see who else you can strike up a chat with. There’s more to say when you first meet someone.

Oh and cats help massively too!

I'm also by myself, working hard in the daytime, and not coping as well as I thought I would, given that I'm an introvert who is usually happy with my own company. What is keeping me going is some structure - a couple of regular zoom chats with two groups - one relatives, one friends - at the weekend - and a weekly pilates class. Plus - checking in occasionally on others who might be finding it difficult- might be living by themselves, might be shielding, might be in a difficult relationship - because it makes you feel a lot better if you think you're actually helping someone else. I'm having regular phone calls with an over 70 neighbour some of whose shopping I'm doing, for example. I'm also chatting a lot more than usual to neighbours - from a safe distance - which is really nice. Might any of those be possible for you? And there's absolutely nothing wrong in talking to a doctor and getting some help - you're not going to be alone. Good luck.

I feel you, OP. I haven’t spoken to anyone in weeks, and realistically won’t be able to speak to another person for many more weeks. Living alone is insanely hard.

I’m so sick of all the threads of people bitching that they’re perfectly happy actually just pottering around the garden and spending time with their DH and DC so anyone struggling needs to STFU.

And don’t get me started on people banging on about how they have no family so don’t miss seeing family when in the same breath they talk about their DH and DC. Your husband and kids are your family! Don’t say you have no family when you live with your family! (Obv I have sympathy to people struggling with the loss of parents but that’s not what I’m talking about.)