Could anyone else do this forever now?

[Gatorgator]

I don’t particularly like it but I wasn’t halpy before either so now it’s just like a different version of unhappy and in some ways it’s a lot less demanding.
I’ve given up trying to home school either dc. I’ve given up going out at all. It’s much much much easier to stay home, not get dressed, watch tv, read some books, wait to go back to bed.
I could do this for a really really really long time. There’s no joy but god it’s easier than real life.

OP you sound like one of the great unwashed. Don't get dressed, watch TV all day, don't bother going out for exercise or fresh air. Do you still wash?

I for one find this very boring. Life has no purpose or meaning right now. I don't overly enjoy my job but I also don't hate it. Going back to work will give me the structure that I'm missing

DUring this lockdown my children’s mental health comes before anything else. Birthdays are a special treat time and lockdown shouldn’t hinder that. Keeping my children happy is essential.

Have you ordered anything online, had it delivered? It’s just the same as your parents dropping your child’s presents off, don’t deprive any of them the joy.

Apart from the school run for 6 year old Dd twice a day, nothing in my life has changed at all. And in fact, I homeschooled my eldest (now nearly 18) until he was 10 so homeschool is no great change for me. Luckily we had just moved so Dd hadn’t started school here yet anyway so I’m not having to contend with work sent home - just doing what I did with Ds when he was little and home educated (apart from the social stuff obviously). Dh had also always worked from home.

If I wasn’t pregnant which is horrible at the moment as I have to go to hospital for regular check ups, everything would be fine.

Good god no, I fucking despise it.

^
I for one find this very boring. Life has no purpose or meaning right now. I don't overly enjoy my job but I also don't hate it. Going back to work will give me the structure that I'm missing

This. I never realised how much i thrive on having places to go and people to see. I constantly feel invaded too. Home used to be my refuge from work, now nuts bern invaded by all my colleagues, DH’s office, colleagues and clients and 2 different schools!

Do what forever? Never see friends, never see family, never go to the cinema, never eat out? Never work again, never see my colleagues, never get paid again? Never go on holiday again, never stay in a hotel again?

No thanks

I know but it’s not essential, the presents thing. What if a neighbour calls the police? My fb local group is full of people reporting other people for doing things. It makes me scared to step outside my front door tbh.

I would quite happily never go anywhere or do anything or see anyone ever again.

If they did call the police (doubtful) do you think the police would actually care?
Have you got her anything for her birthday?

God no. This is awful. I’m not a particularly social person but I miss my family & friends so much. I miss routine, normality, popping to the shops and driving. It’s boring. I even miss rushing around to get out the door..! At least it meant we were going out!

My toddler desperately misses her family, she’s too young to understand but old enough to realises life is very different & frankly quite boring for her. She asks why she can’t go to softplay, swimming, gymnastics class, the park, the library & nursery on a daily basis.

We also have a 6 week old who no family is able to meet. It’s shit. My mum is vulnerable & I just cannot see how she’s ever going to see her grandkids again until a vaccine!

This can all frankly piss off.

You know your motivation for not letting your parents drop off the gifts is because you don’t want to see them. A five minute drive dropping presents off on the way to the shops (or not!! Shock horror) is fine. I’m not passing judgement on you but you need to think about how that will effect others and not just yourself.
I also second PP’s saying you should talk to someone.
And no I couldn’t live like this forever. I miss my parents so much.

Let them call the police, what are they going to do🤷‍♀️, all they can say is a bag was dropped off at your door, could be shopping for all they know. This is hard enough for our DC, I lost my DM to this, my DC will never see her again or get gifts from her on their coming up birthday , wouldnt wish that on anyone.

Yes I’ve got her some things and she will have a cake and balloons and a ‘party’ with her sibling. She will be 4 and should have been having a party with her friends.

@GatorgatorGatorgator I feel the same as you in some ways, life is so much easier. I thought I liked my life before but now I realise how hectic it was. Now I work from home (full pay which is amazing without having leave the house), hubby is at home and furloughed so free to mind the kids, they do their schoolwork on their computers in the day and they don’t have to get lunch made for school every evening, help with homework, class projects, baking for school bake sales, after school activities they need picked up from, trying to get their school uniform sorted every night and then up and out every morning. Life is a lot easier.

@Gatorgator that said I don’t dread going back to normal, but I don’t mind lockdown life

OP I'm completely broken at the moment so I hope to get where you are.

but the problem is money. The future looks horrendous on that front.

Yes I totally appreciate if money is a pressing concern then it’s different. We are fortunate in that regard.
My older dc is very bored, unless in front of a screen and the younger one demands my attention most of the time unless also in front of a screen.
It’s relentless in a different way but it’s so much easier as well. There’s no expectation to do anything, there’s no demand that I rush children to clubs, or school or out for enriching days out. I don’t have to see anyone. I like it. I didn’t expect to as I would say I’m sociable normally and the first week or two I was chatting over the fence with the neighbours etc but now if they are out there I stay in the house. I’d sooner not see anyone at all.

The phrase that’s being thrown around, ‘the new normal’ fills me with enormous dread, fear and sadness.
This isn’t normal. We’re trying to make the best of it but struggling now.
My 3 yr old misses his friends, routine, nursery and grandparents. I miss everything that we took for granted but most of all my parents and friends.
My 9m baby is blissfully unaware, obviously, but this isn’t right. She’s not making those bonds with my parents and our friends and that really upsets me.
Yes I miss the everyday normality- dinner out, coffee, the park, a day out on the beach, the nursery run, swimming but most of all this is time that we won’t get back, making memories out there in ‘the real workd’ With family and friends.

God no, I'm going bonkers not being at work.

If this had come at a time when I was severely depressed and anxious I may have been able to cope better.

As it is I can't wait to go back to work, I'm high risk but I need the structure back in my life.

This is no life for me right now, I will of course abide all the rules, I e not left the house in two weeks. But I couldn't do this forever.

I may need to have a childish, I'm bored strop later.

My anxiety about everything except work as decreased massively. It's a lot esosr to just think about work rather than having to juggle work, school run, social life, etc etc...not totally looking forward to starting all that caper again to be honest. That said I've been busy at work and if I hadn't been I might feel differently I guess.

As a care home manager work has been awful and I'm ready for it to go back to normal now- and I do miss seeing some friends and family. (Not as much as I thought I would in some cases perhaps).

Mixed bag here then-but I know what you mean OP.

No, I'm twenty, single, and want nothing more than to get back to whatever shade of normal I can get.

I highly doubt that a neighbour would bother to call the police if your parents just dropped off a bag of stuff on your doorstep. Even if they did, you could have been ill or isolating and needed them to get you some shopping.

Honestly, this sort of thing is why I never look at our local FB pages. I've never joined them. From what I hear they are full of plenty of shit at the moment, and I live in a village where you can't even fart at one end of it without everyone the other end knowing immediately.

I need to come off the fb stuff, it’s partly why I won’t leave the house. I’m so scared someone is going to report me for something even though I’m not doing anything wrong. It’s making me feel paranoid.

I'm an introvert who deals with depression, I can easily stay home for days at a time just watching tv and not seeing anyone, but I am absolutely hating this and don't feel like I can cope with it much longer. I miss my family and my friends. I miss going out for walks with the kids further than just round the block. I miss days out and drinks with friends and having family round for bbqs.
I would speak to your GP OP, you sound like how I felt before going on antidepressants, very flat and numb

I agree that you need to do something about your mindset OP. In particular your paranoia that someone will call the police on you is extremely bizarre. I think it’s really selfish and neurotic that you won’t let the presents be dropped off on the doorstep for your DD. Birthday presents at 4 are essential. Nobody will give zero shits about it but it will mean the world to her.

I've deleted the Facebook app from my phone, OP. Being 'reported' doesn't scare me particularly but I find all the "Oh my gawwwwddd!!! Stay at home u murderous cretins!!!!!! Let's beet this viruz foreva!!!!! Can't beleev wot I just saw at Tescoooo!!!! Two ppl stud in the same aisle. Soooo selfish!!!!! And they only bort a lofe of bred, not even essentul!!!! " etc posts, followed by "OMG, report them, hun" comments to be depressing and annoying. Lockdown has brought out the best in society (volunteers etc) and thd utter worst (the social media warriors with little understanding of science or grammar)

As for the rest of your post elements of this I could forever, work from home, for example but other parts of my old life like family and weekends away I miss desperately.

I agree with PPs, you sound unwell and a call to GP wouldn't go a miss.