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Original poster

I know IABU but I am totally fed up of lockdown

802 replies

detachablehoof · 28/04/2020 00:18

So. I know I have an awful lot to be thankful for. My family are all in good health, we have no change in our income (yet), my husband is able to work from home, we have a big garden and had plenty of nice weather to enjoy it. There's just us two and our toddler in our house. We're a lot more fortunate than many.

But... I quite honestly don't know how much longer I can stand it. I'm grieving our old life, missing my parents so much, and finding it SO HARD to keep my toddler occupied at home.

I just want to go back to normal 😭 and it doesn't look like there will be a "normal" for a while. It's all just so uncertain and indefinite. It feels like there is nothing to look forward to any more and every day is a chore.

Anyone want to offer some solidarity?

OP posts:
Pomegranatepompom · 03/05/2020 22:05

You think an approach response to someone dying is to say ‘for fucks sake’

How shameful. People are losing their lives because they are caring for positive patients.

Pomegranatepompom · 03/05/2020 22:06

*appropriate

Mascotte · 03/05/2020 23:04

My ffs is for this preaching about how only Covid deaths matter and the judgement of people on how other people should feels

Cantata · 03/05/2020 23:04

I think when you know people who have been very unwell it makes you stick to the rules much more rigidly

Speaking from personal experience: no, it doesn't. It makes you all the more aware that people die every single day for myriad reasons, and we need to live our lives while we can. We should not be locked up on a "what if/just in case" basis.

People will continue to die, regardless of Covid.

Mascotte · 03/05/2020 23:04

Feel

CruCru · 03/05/2020 23:08

I don’t think people can be shamed out of hating lockdown. They may still be keeping to it (almost everyone is) but they are still allowed to hate it.

Original poster
detachablehoof · 03/05/2020 23:34

Wow this thread has been way more popular than I anticipated. I fully expected a barrage of people telling me to stop being so selfish!

Thankfully I've been coping better the last few days, but I really have no idea what the long term effects will be of lockdown on my mental health. Let's hope we're near the beginning of the end. I support the government really, they have such a difficult job. If they take any risk they get flamed, if they are too risk-averse they get flamed.

Now we have seen that the NHS is coping admirably, I am much more scared of the economic impact on the country than of the covid death rate.

OP posts:
Original poster
detachablehoof · 03/05/2020 23:35

@powkin hey friend. All you say resonates. Hang in there, this too shall pass

OP posts:
Original poster
detachablehoof · 03/05/2020 23:39

Oh and anecdotally I do think people are starting to stretch the boundaries of the rules a lot more. There's definitely a lot more people out and about and the supermarket on Saturday was the busiest I've seen it for ages. The local park here has the carpark closed off madness but the road was totally lined with cars.

OP posts:
Grandmi · 03/05/2020 23:39

My daughter is definitely done with this...she has a four month old!! She has been almost anal about the restrictions but I can see that her resilience is disappearing!!

HeIenaDove · 03/05/2020 23:49

If they are going to start getting more people back to work crammed in on the Tube but still tell people they cant see their families it aint gonna wash

A construction workers FB post reiterating similar got shared into my feed yesterday.

Original poster
detachablehoof · 03/05/2020 23:58

Yeah I saw that the construction site near us is opening again tomorrow. And sounds like my husband will have to work from the office again soon. It's just not sustainable to keep everyone at home for much longer. But thank goodness for the furlough scheme etc, I sincerely hope that it limits the economic damage

OP posts:
HeIenaDove · 04/05/2020 00:15

My dad was a site foreman when i was growing up. He worked in construction from the 1950s to the 1990s.

His reaction when i phoned my parents yesterday was "So whos going to police that then" (meaning the social distancing) along with an ironic snort/laugh.

Dowser · 04/05/2020 00:19

We had far more chance of catching it when we were evacuated from Tenerife airport in March with over 2000 people crammed cheek but jowl together and a plane crammed to the rafters, than we were ever going to catch it by driving to exercise, nipping to the supermarket, my children popping in for a coffee, my grandson helping me in the garden.
When you’ve come through an experience like that unscathed, it helps You to be more objective aboUt it And weigh up the risks involved.

I never slept the night before the flight. The atmosphere in the airport was tense. Planes were landing and taking off at two minute intervals , or so it seemed. I’ve never seen anything like it
Barely anyone wore masks. Their was one small eatery open, but we took our own food as usual.
It was a hotbed of human bodies just waiting for a Virus to land on us.
Yet amazingly we’ve both stayed well. Our 6 friends who travelled to different airports in the uk, on different days in the same conditions, all stayed well despite one of them with severe heart and lung condition and no spleen. All well . We travelled to Dublin, Newcastle and Manchester . None of our families have been infected.
Thank god.
There wasn’t even any advice for us at either tenerife airport or our home airport.
So, were we going to go to a quiet place most days so we didn’t go crazy.
Yes.

poloarpanda123 · 04/05/2020 01:10

I've been doing Ok until today. We started on the 18th March. I had to give up most of my work (self employed) and am struggling financially. I have 3 children at home with me (10,8,6) who really haven't been too bad so far but they don't want to go out for a walk or anything. Their dad and I separated about 5 years ago so I am on my own with them. Luckily he sends money each month to help but it's getting harder every day.
People say they are saving money on lockdown. I'm finding it very expensive. I had to buy a new laptop for the children to do their schoolwork (as I use mine for work and don't want it damaged), print things off for school, get activities so they don't sit in front of the box all day and buy more expensive food as I can't get any deliveries and I have to leave the kids in the car outside a certain shop.
I'm quite an introvert person and like my privacy anyway so at first it was bliss, but I'm starting to crumble. Worried about work, investigation for heart probs, the children and yesterday my washing machine went to top it off.
I feel pretty miserable now and I'm trying really hard not to let past depression come back but it's hard with no end in sight.
We're getting up late every day too.

I do feel guilty thinking about all the people suffering more than us but I fear a huge mental health crisis for a lot of people soon and that worries me.

poloarpanda123 · 04/05/2020 01:21

I think we also need to remember that the deaths are horrific and sad but dying of Covid or something else is just as bad. I lost my dad to Pulmonary Fibrosis a few years ago and I've lost other family and friends to different things. We musn't forget the others who are dying from heart attacks, strokes,cancer and everything else whilst we are blinded by this pandemic.

Pomegranatepompom · 04/05/2020 07:02

Any death is awful. I didn’t imply covid was worse.

The transmission is different though. If people bend the rules, develop covid and need care, people caring for them are then being exposed to higher higher viral loads. Individuals need to take responsibility for this.
I agree we need staged exit plan for this, it’s awful so many people are suffering.

Lynda07 · 04/05/2020 12:11

This will cheer you up:

Teaandbiscuits88 · 04/05/2020 13:09

I’ve hit rock bottom today.

My DH is working from sun up to the early hours. His deadline is soon and then he has 2 weeks off but that’s still a couple of weeks away.

I’m totally failing at homeschooling my 6 year old. She doesn’t want to do much and I’m tired of fighting her. Everyone I speak to seem to be able to get their kids do so much. I’m a former teacher too. My toddler just wants his sister to play and she just wants to play with him.

My family are all struggling with their mental health. Especially my gran who I am very close to. She’s sheilding and it’s killing me to not see her.

I’m trying desperately to not cry in front of the kids or my dh. I have no appetite. I’m just existing and trying to hold everything together.

Sorry to hijack the thread. I have no one else to talk to.

HMSSophie · 04/05/2020 13:37

Tea this rock bottom feeling will pass. I felt like that earlier in this thread and honestly feel so much better now, a few days on

In Scandinavia your 6 year old wouldn't even be at school for another year. Keep reading to her, taking and play with her, that's all you need to do imo. It's sounds like you're trying to do so much. It's absolutely terrifying to find such sadness and negativity in ones mind - but it's a natural human response to sustained stress. Be kind to yourself like you would a struggling loved one. Xx

Teaandbiscuits88 · 04/05/2020 13:42

@HMSSophie thank you. Your post really helped put things into perspective. I’m glad you’re feeling better today.

pfrench · 04/05/2020 13:43

I’m totally failing at homeschooling my 6 year old. She doesn’t want to do much and I’m tired of fighting her. Everyone I speak to seem to be able to get their kids do so much.

Nah - just pack in any idea of learning anything. She'll be fine. I'm a teacher and haven't done any 'proper' learning with my child since week one. Can't be doing with the fight. We've done lots of playing outside, lots of trampoline, lots of video games, some TV, some books, lego, art, cooking, walks with illicit stops for snacks in fields.

She'll barely remember this period of time, may as well try to make it as enjoyable as you can. Her education won't suffer for a couple of months off school.

Teaandbiscuits88 · 04/05/2020 14:06

@pfrench thank you so much. That’s just what I needed to hear. I’m just so exhausted and want her to be happy.

Aloux · 04/05/2020 15:36

I didn't have much of a social life before this but still, I'm a single mum to a 7yr old, I miss being at work and just having a somewhat life, going on nights out with friends, seeing my family and friends and being able to see my bf, I know that will all sound selfish to some but it's my life and I'm entitled to moan because it's shit it really is I live in a flat so we have no garden I can't even go to the park 5 minutes away for a little bit of enjoyment in my child's life he hasn't been able to see his dad as he's a key worker and is worried that he may be putting him at risk missing his cousins and his friends I just want my life back sooner the better xx

Leighhalfpennysthigh · 04/05/2020 15:55

You think an approach response to someone dying is to say ‘for fucks sake

Yep. Have run out of fucks to give now. My husband killed himself, my mother died of cancer, one of my employees nearly died from covid. Dying from covid or being a HCP and dying does not make a death more worthy or more sad than people dying in other ways.

Like suicide - which people will do in lockdown
Like cancer - which is likely to happen
Like an MI - happening now
Like a stroke - also happening now