Cats , Flaps and The Clap

[PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock]

The other thread is filling up fast so setting up the foundation for our new evil lair. One where we follow real guidelines, not made up ones, make sock cocks ,ruin hair and bemoan the shortage of Spanish soldiers.

This is where we'll keep each other sane or descend into madness together... depends on the day.

Herbs duly repotted.

DP has recently emerged and when I confessed my sin, mildly replied 'Yes, I saw a bag had been opened'. Which is a nice way of saying 'There's fucking compost dusted all over the fucking downstairs and you're shit at sweeping up'. I do rather like him at times, especially as he goes out on foraging expeditions to the local shops and brings back things like strawberries.

Was there supposed to be clapping last night? I think the local God Botherers have put people off with last week's Clap for JEEEEEEEEZUZZZZZZ, they've been closed down by the Old Bill for congregating and being bloody noisy gits - or, with the week it is, they're being very solemn and introspective whilst still congregating on the quiet. I don't associate the smaller church/religious organisations with observing Tenebrae, though.

I'm not sure if this has already been mentioned but is anyone planning on watching the How Clean is Your House Coronavirus special? Apparently we can learn how to quarantine and properly disinfect my food.

There's a link on the Daily Mail that's comedy gold (spray your shopping with surgical spirit anyone?) but I'm too scared to share it as it's from the Mail!

Pringle you are only allowed chardonnay if you share. Thats a rule i just made up but its now law according to the rest of MN thinking.

Theres a thread that all 20 -30 year olds should be allowed out of lockdown. Op apparently thinks its a good idea because her ds misses gettin up close and personal with his gf! The logistics of policing this and the "where the hell will they all go" of it is lost apparently. Also according to some apparently they have more stress about thier finances and future than the rest of us old over 30s fuddy duddies trying to support our families and keep a roof over our heads on crap pay.
We deserve it according to one poster as we have all screwed over the younger generation. Huh! Yes by working all my life for what i had and losing it all due to circumstances not of my doing i have screwed thousands of young people.😠😠
Pass that bloody wine😬

Pink
Ha ha i think i will pass. It will only reinforce how much i hate housework and have to force myself to do it normally so i will no doubt feel like a proper slattern watching that!

Its bound to be 6pm somewhere Shits😉

spray your shopping with surgical spirit anyone?

I actually have some of that.

20-30?!? I'm only 34 ffs I'm not researching retirement communities yet.

How Clean is Your House Coronavirus specia

I already know.. filthy,disgusting,head ache inducing and we'll all get eaten by cockroaches and worms. Oh wait ..that was the my mum special.

Probably get a worse headache from all the chemicals they will be using on the programme!

I only have three bottles of wine as that's all they would allow me at Stasi Central Tesco but I could always make a second trip and pick up some additional Easter eggs as they are all on special offer.

And then go straight to Hell.

And to whoever asked if it was too early for wine. Shame on you.

... by "second trip", I of course mean "first trip out in 7 months".

Lala no that was another 'clapped out' poster 😀

Top tip don't drink before you conference call as you won't give a fuck
😂😂😂😂😂

Been out and managed to prize ds1 out too. Quick walk at sea front then i went in to coop fir shopping. No bloody eggs so ds2 and i cant make the vitally important choc banana bread to use up my bananas. Even bought more bananas to eat, including a ripe one to make up the weight for BB!
But managed to get filler in the shop that sells everything so lookout bathroom!

I've discovered I've eaten a lot of bread this week. Normally a loaf lasts me two weeks, (I freeze it and just take 2 slices out as I need) I'm on my second loaf already, in fact over half way.
I think I tell myself I'm hungry but just eat toast not bars of chocolate. Not sure two toast with real butter is better than large bar of choc?
Hmm well in other news, I'm out of wine, considering sending DP out for some when he gets in.

I've not sinned today. I think that means I can def sin again tomorrow - maybe even twice?

Also that 20-30yr olds being allowed to escape. I am above that age, my DP is within that age. Imagine. Me stood there waving at him out the window whilst he goes off into the big wide world whilst I am stuck at home eating myself out of house and home --which I am already doing-

If Tesco have Easter eggs on offer and I go on my way home (still working which is a deadly sin in itself as surely everyone can wfh even if they run an engineering factory!) can I buy Easter Eggs AND Gin do you think?! As I'm also going out for a 20 mile cycle (which will take 1 hour and 20 minutes) I will be breaking The Roolz three times over!

I've just read that thread and I think I've done myself an injury rolling my eyes so hard. If this had happened when I was in my twenties it would have been a right doss with no child to look after, I didn't even have a cat to hassle me for food!

Blobby I think buying gin and Easter eggs at the same time is being efficient and saving you a second trip, you're basically saving lives.

I have gravely sinned. Took DD out on her scooter. Just outside the flats, for no other reason that she wanted to. I sat in the sun,had a fag (or three) and she scooted or looked for bugs.

We saw a neighbour which weirdly enough didn't run and hide , but smiled and stayed for a distanced chat.

I also need to seek forgiveness. Managed to get dd age 13 out for first time in weeks for a dog walk with DH. Never seen so many people! Walked along a track to small lake. By time got to lake my fibro and arthritis was playing up so asked him to walk dogs back to home and pick car. Me and dd sat on the bank of the lake making daisy chains for the next half hour. Was absolutely bliss. Not a soul around apart from some swans. Will probably end up on tonight's local facebook page as breaking the no sitting down rule when you're on your daily walk. Just as a caveat, this is only the second time I've been outside the house/garden for a walk since lockdown so I guess I'm owed like a thousand hours 🤣🤣🤣

Winging you shall be hanged with a daisy chain. If you survive you're innocent of all wrong doing.

I also went on a dog walk (with dogs this time). Ran into my neighbour (not literally, because that's just weird, even before the roolz) and he said the novelty had really worn off now and he was totally fed up with the lockdown. I raced home to report him.
I've also bleached the dogs because I hadn't realised that was the done thing. Expect the curve to flatten accordingly over the next few days.