The positive mental health thread:-pt 5

[tobee]

How's that?

I’m finding the “you must create a routine” thing stressful so I have decided not to do it in too much detail. Going to bed and getting up at the same time every day, sure I can do that part. Ditto mealtimes. But the rest of it I just want to keep going with the flow. I might have to adjust this attitude when DD2 starts getting proper school assignments and homework on Monday.

Thank you for that Buttermilk waffles. Very encouraging

@HeartsTrumpDiamonds

Different strokes for different folks! You do what makes you feel good.

Lovely to 'see' you again.. We are both well & coping.

@magimedi lovely to see you too (((unmumsnetty hug)))

We are hanging in there!

@HeartsTrumpDiamonds Routines aren’t for everybody! I started out with a daily routine for DD (who is 2) but we’ve thrown it by the wayside as some days she had less energy and just wanted to snuggle up all day instead. Now I just try and make sure we do some whole body movement, fine motor/mark making and read stories every day. Much less pressure!

Just had a nice chat with my friend's parents who happened to be passing by on a walk. They stood on the drive while me and DD were in an upstairs window shouting down.

What does everyone think about this- our gardens are small and if I’m planting stuff in mind the neighbours could be about 5 feet from me- however there is a 6 foot high fence between us. Am I alright to go out there?

I think you'd be OK Bunny but if you are worried pick a time when your neighbours aren't out.

@riotlady thank you! I like hearing about other non-routine people. Makes me feel better.

@magimedi they are out there ALL FUCKING DAY.

I’m so down today and I want to scream/ die. Life has always been so hard and it never gets any better and now this has fucking happened and the few things that gave me joy have gone and there is no end to this in sight.

Noooblerooble

I am missing my closest friend so much. I am focusing on the day I can jump on the train and go and see her. I will stand there and poke and squish her lovely face to make sure she's real then cling onto her for an hour.

This is so beautiful. It sums up my feelings so I copied it to my best friend and made us both cry

Hugs bunny, you sound really desperate. It’s ok to be fucked off, none of this is fair

Oh Bunnyflop I'm sorry it's all gone to shit. I would persist with going into the garden. With any luck they'll move away from the fence.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds I guess it's horses for courses. I'm wfh (for the first timr) and sticking to my usual routine and doing my usual 9-5 hours and wearing work clothes. I guess I'm trying to normalise my weekdays and "pretend" I've gone to work maybe? It's working for me (and there are no children in the mix which makes things easier I think). But my three best friends are adopting a much more fluid approach and that works for them.

I won't link to news articles because I know some people are avoiding them, but does anyone understand the timescales around the reporting in figures and deaths? As in, which will
slow first and how long before we see the difference lockdown has made? I just read one article that said there is a big delay in death reporting. I'm not sure I understood it correctly. How do we know when we've 'peaked'?

Thank God!

I thought I'd lost you.

I just read one article that said there is a big delay in death reporting. I'm not sure I understood it correctly

I think it's because of the length of time people are ill. The vast majority of people who catch Covid-19 get ill a few days after being infected, and are ill for about a week. Then totally recover.

The very tiny percentage who are hospitalised do the feeling sick at home for a week thing, then go to hospital, another while in there while they try to treat the pneumonia, then into ICU, ventilator etc if it gets that far. Most don't. So there's a considerable time lag. Plus as well many of the people who have died have underlying health issues and it's a case of disentangling what actually they died of.

It's really not straightforward.

Hello all, I wondered if we'd moved to another thread!

@Bunnyflop I'm sorry, that sounds really tough. As @Millie2013 says, it's perfectly reasonable to feel thoroughly pissed off and despairing.

I would keep using your garden. I would have thought a high fence would help to protect you, just as the supermarket screens do. And although you do need to stay away from people, the open air should also help any virus that is being shed to disperse more widely than indoors. You also need to preserve your mental health as well as your physical health.

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

LOVING your music taste, I am a big fan of Cream

A bit of a wobble; made the mistake of looking at today's news briefing.

But i am super grateful still for blessings; beautiful weather, big garden and healthy kids.

I don't mind isolating at all, which is sad. Shows how restricted my life was! Miss my research and lab which has all gone now while I'm at 100% full time mum and housewife for the first time since I got married.

I guess my biggest gripe is that I find doing 100% childcare 24/7 exhausting. DH has to work+ useless on weekends. And I feel bad for my 4yo missing her school....At this point I pull myself up and count my blessings!

Deep breath. I'm hoping in 4 weeks this will be over and who knows? Maybe even schools open in June after May half term...

@spudlet thanks. The neighbours went in so after tea me and ds went out there and planted some new roses. Made me feel a bit better.

@robinhobb here’s hoping 🤞

That's so lovely StCharlotte

A very gentle hug to anyone struggling. These are such difficult days. But there is a weird advantage to being in the thick of it because if we can all hang on soon enough this will end. Imagine if we were sitting here together but it was 6 months ago and we somehow knew what was up ahead. That would be unbearable. Hold your breath and block your ears and keep your eyes on something closer to home and when you look back up we'll be through this. I feel at an advantage right now in that i have experienced some pretty awful things in my life and they've given me a knowledge that very hard things largely pass (with some exceptions obviously) and you can be ok again. More than ok. Humans are an incredibly resilient species. I don't want to imply that others haven't been through bad things too but I know some won't have done and perhaps it does help to hear that.

I have had a sad day. I'm ok but I think the last 2 weeks I've had to get on with some pretty boring work. I'm nearly done with it and then I get to pursue more fun stuff and a more interesting work project is starting up but it's pulled my mood down having to grit my teeth through it recently with all the bad vurus news. I have felt very lonely today too. I really do badly need a proper hug and to be in the same room as someone I love for a few hours. You can't beat that feeling can you? I will feel better soon. I am going to work through the weekend to get my work out the way then crack on with more fun stuff.

I also want to break open some of my recipe books and cook something new every week. I think a really nice Ottolenghi recipe or something would do me the world of good. I feel I need more trashy tv in my life too.

Robin, ex scientist here, I left academia over 5 years ago and I do miss science, moreso right now for some reason! Parenting little ones 24/7 is hard

I have been struggling but I need to take it 1 day at a time and I need to concentrate on good news.