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Original poster

Daughter 24 wants to come home

762 replies

AinJD · 28/03/2020 20:55

DD loves London but is working from her little room in a shared house currently as office is closed - life so different from normal and says she just wants to come home (to North Yorkshire) where she can have more space and will feel somehow safer with family. DH reluctantly (is it essential?) said he’ll fetch her tomorrow if she’s sure she wants to be here till the end of the lockdown. He will go there and back, no interactions with anyone but her. We all feel guilty already at going against the spirit of the guidance, but she’s taken care to walk everywhere for the past two weeks, is not ill and will self-isolate in her room here for seven days on arrival. It is probably not essential but feels natural for her to want to be here with us and of course we don’t really in our hearts want to say no. We almost wish there was a form to fill in for this mission!

OP posts:
Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:02

Yes. It was a powerful message when Chris Whitty and the other Medical officer said... " you not making journeys means you are saving lives"

So taking that as The Message means... "you making unnecessary journeys endangers lives".

And yet people on here just don't care about endangering lives, not one bit, as long as they can do what they want to do. You 'Go Get Her' crowd are beyond selfish.

LaurieMarlow · 29/03/2020 14:03

I am at a loss to understand how those who want the rules... not for them... can justify it

By lying to themselves, which we’re seeing a lot of on this thread.

There’s no risk ... err, yes there is.

It’s an essential journey ... no it isn’t.

The meanies on MN made me do it ... the OP still takes the biscuit.

LaurieMarlow · 29/03/2020 14:06

And yet people on here just don't care about endangering lives, not one bit, as long as they can do what they want to do

What very interesting is that they say they do, they want to believe they do, they want confirmation from others that everyone else believes they do.

However their actions make it obvious that they really couldn’t give a shit.

DowntownAbby · 29/03/2020 14:06

I've pasted this entire thread into Excel and run a quick bit of VBA to pull out the user names.

So far 91 people saying they think it's ok - and in many cases offering encouragement - for the OP to transfer her daughter from a virus hotspot to our mostly rural, health-resource-lacking county, with complete disregard for instructions from PHE and the govt.

Absolutely incredible.

I cannot believe that @MNHQ can just let this go with no comment.

NoSauce · 29/03/2020 14:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

PerkingFaintly · 29/03/2020 14:09

We all going to get virus so why not bring your family together if you can.

Because if we all get it at the same time, we will die when we might have survived (not enough medical care to go round during peak).

Because if we carry on long enough without getting it, there will be vaccines and possibly better treatments.

Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:11

OMG Downton that is awful.

So when we reach the numbers of Spain and Italy, those 91 need to come back on MN and justify again whey the rules don't apply to them.

I know three people who have it. Diagnosed with a test. One is very poorly but still at home at the moment, been in bed for two weeks now. The other is in a coma in hospital, I doubt he'll come out. The third who has been diagnosed was poorly but has recovered.

When deaths reach the levels of other countries, I don't suppose we'll see those who offered encouragement to break the rules.. for dust.

Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:14

We all going to get virus so why not bring your family together if you can

So my DH who has underlying conditions should just ummmm... get it and most likely die? And my 30 year old nephew with heart problems should do the same?

I thought MN was basically an intelligent community. I'm slowly revising that opinion.

LaurieMarlow · 29/03/2020 14:17

I heard someone say the other day that they would no longer be having anything to do with certain people in their social circle who were flouting the guidelines.

People will be judged by their actions on this one.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 29/03/2020 14:19

And yet people on here just don't care about endangering lives, not one bit, as long as they can do what they want to do. You 'Go Get Her' crowd are beyond selfish.

Exactly.

We have to stop thinking of ourselves as individuals. Every single thing that we do now has implications for everyone and people aren't seeing it

"It's fine if I just...it's only one journey, shopping trip, meet up with someone, train ride, long car journey" whatever it may be very single interaction now has the potential to spread the virus. It really isn't about us as individuals any more.

MarieQueenofScots · 29/03/2020 14:19

I run an event. I have already blown out my supplier of promo items because of the way they’ve been behaving. They’re now sending grovelling chain mails to their mailing list on how they “misjudged” so I imagine I’m not the only one who noticed!

Mittens030869 · 29/03/2020 14:20

@Roussette I'm so sorry about your friends, this is an awful time. Thanks

I'm in the same way as your friend at home, though I haven't been tested (unlike Charles and CamillaHmm).

I'm sorry I caused offence on here. I made completely the wrong call when I first answered (at about 4am, riddled by insomnia and nausea, because the idea of one of my DDs being unwell and alone was awful. But I know I was wrong, and I'm constantly telling my DM that her ideas of coming here or having one of my DDs at her house to help (when she's 80 and vulnerable and I'm vulnerable too).

But once again I apologise, the anger on here is understandable.

Snowman123 · 29/03/2020 14:21

Every parent is going to say go and get her.

Go and get her.

Medievalist · 29/03/2020 14:21

@TinklyLittleLaugh -

Do you think we should all obey the rules the government has imposed on us? Or do you think we should all be allowed to interpret them how we want? Or do you think only certain people should be allowed to interpret them how they want?

Hearhoovesthinkzebras · 29/03/2020 14:23

Every parent is going to say go and get her.

I'm a parent. My two children are away from home. I desperately want them home.

I'm not saying go and get her

DowntownAbby · 29/03/2020 14:24

@snowman123

Go and get her

92 then.

Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:25

Thank you Mittens. Hope you're getting better every day.

The one who is closest to me is the person who has been in bed with it for nearly two weeks. It's my godson's wife. Very tricky as he has heart problems so she is still home, and stays in bed but worried to death about him catching it. She got up for an hour yesterday (he sat in the garden!) and then went back to bed as she was exhausted, it's a long haul. She was tested because she was in direct contact with someone who had it, but didn't know, and her work got her tested.

Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:26

Every parent is going to say go and get her.

Nope. There are others on here, and me, who have single DCs in London and are not flouting the rules and endangering other people's lives. I'm a parent.

Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:29

And FWIW I won't stop posting despite a poster on here suggesting a bunch of us do stop.

If... by posting... I can make just one person think again about their actions in this horrible time, it'll be worth it. It might save a life.

Selfishness and entitlement to do what you want has to be challenged.

InvisibleWomenMustBeRead · 29/03/2020 14:30

No one has answered my earlier question though - if she comes home and they all self isolate for 2 weeks surely that has contained any risk?

Roussette · 29/03/2020 14:34

Because they won't. That's why. The whole family self isolating? Nah, won't happen.

If you're selfish enough to break the rules in the first place, you're hardly going to bother to self isolate are you?

Mittens030869 · 29/03/2020 14:34

@Roussette I wasn't complaining about your friend being tested, that was right, I think anyone with bad symptoms should be. (Not just because they're royal, but that's derailing the thread.)

I suppose I am getting better, but it's a bumpy road, with setbacks. I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome as a result of pneumonia last year, so I'm not all that strong at the best of times, either.

My DH has asthma so I worry about him getting it too, and my DM and MIL are elderly, 80 and 79 respectively.

LaurieMarlow · 29/03/2020 14:35

if she comes home and they all self isolate for 2 weeks surely that has contained any risk?

They run the risk of infecting people while on the way trip, because are they really going to do that run with no stops whatsoever?

Also what if one of them is infected but asymptomatic and spreads without realising?

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 29/03/2020 14:35

They're not following the rules to only make essential journeys, you're having laugh if you think they'll actually self isolate for 2 weeks. Rules don't apply to them Hmm

Frankiecandle · 29/03/2020 14:39

Are posters really keeping spreadsheets?

Dear god, this place is even more nuts than it was before.