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So confused re FIL - handhold please?

233 replies

EchoLocation · 28/03/2020 16:24

Sorry this is long...

Ten days ago my FIL (75, lives alone 50 miles away from us, very active and healthy) came down with coronavirus symptoms. He didn't call DH until day 4 and we encouraged him to call 111; by then he wasn't eating and did not sound good.
A doctor came out early on day 5 and prescribed antibiotics for a chest infection. FIL thought he had also tested for COVID-19.
Day 6 he felt a bit better and ate something.
Day 7 he felt awful again and didn't get out of bed. We called 111 but there was a mix up and we were promised a call back which never happened. At this point we were waiting for the COVID test to be negative so DH could go and look after him - we then found out FIL had been confused about this and he hadn't been tested after all.
Day 8 he seemed confused, didn't know what day of the week it was or what was going on. My DH called 111 who sent an ambulance and he was taken in.
We eventually got though to A&E who told us he was being admitted but couldn't give us any details but said he "probably has coronavirus".
Day 9 we managed to speak to FIL on his mobile and he seemed ok. A nurse on the ward said they were still waiting for results of tests, inc for COVID-19. From what I gather, he is on a general geriatic ward so this is worrying itself.

Anyway today, day 10, DH called the ward. The results are still not back but the nurse has said FIL has spiked another fever, he has fluid on his lungs and basically we need to prepare ourselves for the worst. She even said he has signed to say he doesn't want respiratory support if it's required.
The really confusing part is DH then spoke to FIL on the phone and he sounded ok-ish?? He said he's got no trouble breathing, just feels weak and shaky, he was grumpy about his uncomfortable hospital bed and kept saying he couldn't wait to get home. He certainly does not sound like he's a death's door, but then we are not medically trained. Do people tend to go down hill very quickly in these circumstances?
We are really aware of how much pressure the staff at the hospital must be at the moment so don't want to keep ringing but we are just so confused and don't feel like we have any answers. It is SO hard not being able to go to him. We just don't know what to do with ourselves, we keep swinging between feeling like it can't be that bad and fearing the worst.
Has anyone been through similar? Any advice?
Sorry if this is garbled, I can't think straight atm.

OP posts:
Saz12 · 31/03/2020 14:00

I’m so glad you were able to video call and show him he is loved. Sympathies to you and your DH, such an incredibly difficult time.

kauri25 · 31/03/2020 14:04

It is so moving to read how you are managing such a sad situation. I’m so glad you got that video call with FIL and he knew how much he is loved by you. Sending prayers for FIL and all of you.

loobyloo1234 · 31/03/2020 14:08

So sorry to you and your DH OP. This thread has made me cry so much. I am so sad for him. So sad for anyone going through this. I am so glad you got to speak to him today. Bless him, he sounds lovely. You'll all me in my thoughts Flowers

coronade · 31/03/2020 14:08

Still praying for you. Xx

Didkdt · 31/03/2020 14:10

I'm so pleased you could all take comfort from that call.
People are beating this I hope he is one of them and you do get him to fix the fence in the summer

Snog · 31/03/2020 14:47

Video call will have booster FIL too, here's hoping he can defeat the virus and mend the fence ThanksThanksThanks

2018SoFarSoGreat · 31/03/2020 15:12

I'm so glad you got to do that call. The power of love had no bounds.

As @Snog says, let's hope he
Mends the Fence.

ememem84 · 31/03/2020 21:41

Oh jeeez.

Fingers crossed he gets that fence mended! Xxx

xine15 · 31/03/2020 21:49

Thinking of you op xxxThanks

Brenna24 · 31/03/2020 21:59

I have only just seen this. I am so sorry that you are in this position. I will pray for a miracle for you and hope that if it doesn't happen then he at least passes peacefully. I am glad that you got to say goodbye.

runwithme · 31/03/2020 22:16

I am so, so sorry to hear this. This is just awful xx

Teana89 · 31/03/2020 23:52

I am so sorry. I hope with every fibre of my being that he does get to mend the fence.
Much love to you and your family.

littlemissmuffins · 01/04/2020 02:35

I am so sorry xx

spamm · 01/04/2020 03:07

I am so sorry for what your family is going through. Thinking of you all and your FIL from Virginia.

Ifeelinclined · 01/04/2020 03:16

Best wishes from Alabama. I'm so sorry. I hope that your FIL recovers well. Thanks

turnandfacethenamechange · 01/04/2020 03:16

You're in my thoughts OP x

Chimchar · 01/04/2020 03:18

Thinking of you all. Your fil sounds like a lovely man x

Ifeelinclined · 01/04/2020 03:19

Oh! I'm so sorry that I hadn't read the most recent update. I'm just so sorry that your family is going through so much right now. I will be praying

p0rridge · 01/04/2020 03:35

Thinking of you and your family, OP x

Rowgtfc72 · 01/04/2020 03:59

Thinking of you and your family x

Bool · 01/04/2020 04:19

@EchoLocation sending all my love Flowers

coachman · 01/04/2020 08:09

I'm so sorry. Thinking of you and your family xx

rubyslippers83 · 01/04/2020 15:51

Thinking of you and your family OP X

devildeepbluesea · 01/04/2020 16:00

Thinking of you all, and I'm rooting for your FIL like nobody's business which is weird as I don't know him!

Gillian1980 · 01/04/2020 16:19

Been thinking of you and your family constantly for past couple of days. 💐

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