My mother has just stomped off home

[NoProblem123]

I’ve been self isolating since last Monday with a SEN child with underlying health conditions. Stocked up and organised all good, and wfh.
Mum was flitting round town as late as Friday because she was ‘bored and there’s hardly anyone about anyway’. She has her own underlying health problems and lives alone with not much provisions so I obviously told her to come to me on Friday.
She’s ‘needed’ to go out every day since for one thing or another so I’ve drove her around and gone in. She’s got increasingly difficult since saying I’m OTT and I shouldn’t watch the news and starting fights with either me or DD. I’ve sorted Sainsbury’s click and collects so she can go and get them, she’s taken the dogs out for short walks to stay busy but she just couldn’t settle (although she normally stays at mine every weekend anyway).
Just now she’s asked if there’s any jobs to do so I said my DD could do with her bed changing (not desperately but if she wants a job). She caused a big argument with DD that she should be doing it herself, then packed up her car and left, to go home presumably but no doubt shopping on the way.
I’m sitting here crying now thinking I might not see her again.
Am I being OTT ? Is it ok for her to go home for a few days and come back ? She lives 20 mins away but won’t do internet shopping.
She’s nearly 70 😔

How are you self-isolating with her flitting in and out? She's being incredibly irresponsible and selfish. Let her be at home.

She shouldn’t be at your house any way unless I’ve misread your post?
Good let her go home and stay there.

I obviously told her to come to me on Friday.
I’ve drove her around and gone in
I said my DD could do with her bed changing
Is it ok for her to go home for a few days and come back ?

No. To all of these.
Please isolate your household.
Tell her she must isolate hers.

You are not self isolating if she’s coming in and out all the time.

Erm.....I'm sorry to say you haven't been self isolating at all, if you think you've been keeping your household safe, you haven't. Your mother is a liability.

You can’t control your mum but you can control yourself.

No. Tell her to stay home so you can protect your dc properly and don't let her manipulate you into having her back.

Honest to God we have no chance if this is what people think self isolating is!

None of what you have done is self isolating.

Was she supposed to be moving in with you? She either comes to you and stays in or she goes home and doesnt come back

Agree with all the PP!

Don't let her come back, harsh i know but she is selfish and this is exactly what is spreading the virus, people flownsing about.

Show her the Italian/Spanish hospital videos then tell her to stay at (her own) home.

You must stop her coming to see you OP. She's an adult so you can't force her to stay at home against your will, but at least you can do that.

You’re not self-isolating if you’re Mum is there & you are and driving her around. You are not self-isolating by sharing a car or going into multiple shops. You aren’t even social distancing as she is not resident at your address. Multiple trips out -
was she following handwashing guildlines, the guidelines on disinfecting shopping once it is in your home, sanitising the car steering wheel and handles, cleaning the bathroom & door handles in the house to minimise contamination after they have been used, minimal physical contact with your vulnerable DD...?

Every single risk she has taken is now a risk you have taken - as if you did all the stupid things she’s done. Then you said she could change a bed in the room where your child who should be shielded and isolated if they have underlying conditions is going to sleep? Nobody in your household should have had any external contact really, let alone all the things you’ve listed.

Now she has gone and is presumably back resident at own address then you’ll be able to see her in 12 weeks. Letting her come back ‘in a few days’ would be ridiculous. There will be Facebook groups offering help with getting shopping etc, keep in touch by phone & look after yourselves, your child should be your priority. Also get some clean (not potentially contaminated) sheets on the bed.

Fuck knows how many millions of people really haven’t grasped the concept - in ten days time the reality of that will be here & it’s going to be harrowing :(

Yes she was coming stay, I wanted to keep her safe and I had plenty in for all of us.
I couldn’t let her carry on like that she just didn’t get the danger she was putting herself (& others) in. I know it put us at risk too.
She want going in and out after other than click and collect and dog walks, both of which are contactless.

She’s my only other family and you only get one mum.

You haven't been self isolating or practicing social distancing

You must be joking. People haven't seen their mothers for weeks now and won't for a long time, but that's the way it is. Yours is no different. She should be at home like every fucker else is.

She’s my only other family and you only get one mum.
So why would you want to increase the chances of losing her by exposing her to unnecessary risks of exposure to the virus?

I feel your pain. Mine had a tantrum because we asked her not to visit on Mother’s Day. She’s 80, with multiple health problems. Trying to do this for her own good and it’s exhausting.

Self isolating is meant to be with ybe people who live with you all the time if possible.

You arent self isolating if you are driving her round.

You say she keeps popping out, as though she doesnt need to. Now making it that actually what she is doing is fine. If she doesnt need to and you are going with her, that's not self isolating.

And no, she cant go and come back in a few days

Did you not understand that we're not supposed to be seeing family?

well if your mother has it from all her gallivanting about then now so does your vulnerable daughter so good one OP

what on earth possesed you?

FFS OP.. think of your daughter... you've not been self isolating atall .. can you not see this ??

I know it put us at risk too.

I know you only get one mum, but please put your family first as well.