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Wait a second ... how do we do custody exchanges?!

299 replies

PicsInRed · 23/03/2020 20:35

Nothing in Boris' message about travel to exchange children for contact.

What is the legal position here?

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Vinylsamso · 23/03/2020 22:42

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Sotiredofthislife · 23/03/2020 22:42

You can argue contact with their father is essential

I agree. We live in a modern world. That contact doesn’t have to be physical face to face living in the same house contact for the duration of the lockdown. I am actually contemplating asking the ex to move in for lockdown but know it would be tough on all of us if that were to happen. Very difficult.

FishOnPillows · 23/03/2020 22:44

I’m beside myself with worry. My children are with their father who is the RP atm (I have weekends) but it’s currently going through courts (currently doing a Section 7 report) as he’s abusive and neglectful. I’ve been trying to get hold of someone at Cafcass since last Thursday, but their Guardian is away until Wednesday and I either can’t get through to cafcass or they say they’ll call back but never do. This past weekend the children refused to go back (as they always do), they were crying and hiding and begging, and they were absolutely terrified of being in lockdown with their father. They talked about sneaking out of the house and running away. They’re 6 and 9. It is unsafe for them to be in this situation. And I have no idea what I can do.

chomalungma · 23/03/2020 22:44

why would maintenance stop? Contact and maintenance have always been totally separate. Children aren't pay per view

Because there are people out there who will stop maintenance if they suddenly find they have their children for 3 weeks instead of the occasional Saturday once a week.

blubellsarebells · 23/03/2020 22:44

I think seeing a parent is essential.
If there were other stepkids coming in and out of the households it would be a different risk to manage but i cant see how me and ex both living alone going to local shop once a week is different to if we lived in the same house and shopped once a week each.
We're both home from work now.

Lonelycrab · 23/03/2020 22:45

I also offered the ex a room at mine while this is happening. Not sure how that would pan out....

Francesthemute · 23/03/2020 22:45

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Notredamn · 23/03/2020 22:45

But there is absolutely no need for that to happen, choma

Bostondad · 23/03/2020 22:45

I picked up my boys tonight for a few days as there mum was sopposed to be working but now isint due to the closing of her workplace we live an hour apart, I've been working from home for the last 10 days we are not self isolating so far so good, I think tomorrow I'm likely to have my work closed also. Do i take them back !? It's my weekend this weekend, honestly I want to do the right thing but when I went to pick them up she had friends over ! I mean who would have people in at a time like this ! She will go mental if i tell her there staying here for the time being. We do need some clarity on this

chomalungma · 23/03/2020 22:46

But there is absolutely no need for that to happen, choma

And you don't think some NRPs won't do that?

Especially those who begrudgingly pay maintenance?

usercheeselover · 23/03/2020 22:47

DSilaw has said goodbye to her kids as she has a major NHS role. It's for a short while and I hugely applaud her. DB can isolate with the children so they are.

Meanwhile, DP has begrudgingly a weekend ago, accepted that contact with his DC must cease.... we are a 100 mile apart two family set up with huge outside contact via work - school and health professionals (not NHS) and I don't think the risk is worth it and boy did we row.

DP has self isolated with depression ! We are all built from different stuff - but I want to kick him in the balls

Sotiredofthislife · 23/03/2020 22:47

@lonelycrab. Glad I’m not the only one to have thought of that. I am not sure I could trust him to,properly lock down for 14 days - we are 7 days in ourselves so if we get to 14 without symptoms, I really want to keep it that way.

MurrayTheMonk · 23/03/2020 22:48

I did too Lonelycrab...he said no-was a bit relieved but it would have been raise than the wrangles we are about to have...

RuffleCrow · 23/03/2020 22:48

The rule isn't no contact outside the household. It's no more than two people from different households can meet in public isn't it? We're still allowed to go out for excercise and to buy food. And to work, if needed. So why not to ship kids from one home to their other home?

Notredamn · 23/03/2020 22:49

Why would a NRP suddenly be having their child for 3 weeks instead of once a week, choma? It's utterly bizarre that some people think that non essential social contact is applicable to their own children. Unless in exceptional circumstances, contact will continue as normal.

Bostondad · 23/03/2020 22:49

I think your spot on with this, kids need both parents

chomalungma · 23/03/2020 22:51

Why would a NRP suddenly be having their child for 3 weeks instead of once a week, choma

Because right now, there are NRPs with their children. If children aren't allowed to travel between homes, then they are with their NRPs for 3 weeks.

RuffleCrow · 23/03/2020 22:51

Oh gosh, we have women offering their exes a room now. Not all exes are created equal, but that solution could be fatal for me and for others.

chomalungma · 23/03/2020 22:52

It's utterly bizarre that some people think that non essential social contact is applicable to their own children. Unless in exceptional circumstances, contact will continue as normal.

That does not make sense

Notredamn · 23/03/2020 22:52

But they are allowed, choma! Oh my good god. I'm done. Hiding the thread.

Lonelycrab · 23/03/2020 22:52

Well actually I’m a dad, we get on well but have really pulled together through this for the good of ds.

chomalungma · 23/03/2020 22:53

But they are allowed, choma! Oh my good god. I'm done. Hiding the thread

Do you not know what this thread is about?

Notredamn · 23/03/2020 22:53

It makes perfect sense choma
Child parental contact is unaffected.

chomalungma · 23/03/2020 22:54

Child parental contact is unaffected

Ummm. What is the title of this thread?

Notredamn · 23/03/2020 22:55

I've been on the thread since the beginning. I think your reading comprehension is off, choma, not mine.
Stop interpreting the rules of this lockdown as meaning children can't live in their homes as usual.

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