Anyone else teary tonight

[StealthPolarBear]

It's not like me. It's just hit me.

Thanks for posting OP - I found myself welling up at the letter from our primary school head today - really brought it home. Also not like me. Eldest DC hates change but had settled beautifully into new school and now really upset about not seeing friends and will struggle without the routine (poss ASD); had to cancel another DC birthday party this weekend; youngest is the last of ours to go to our wonderful local preschool and the thought that he'll miss his Easter and end of year stuff is so sad. He's been singing songs for the last two weeks and after taking a while to settle has been so happy going and it really hit me that that might be it after tomorrow. It's just made everything so poignant. He also missed the whole group photo last year and probably won't end up with one now.

As someone said upthread, it's the not knowing and the fact it could be so long and still not go back to 'normal'. And the longer it is, the harder it will be to come back from.

Having said that, my woes seem utterly trivial in comparison to so many others here - am almost embarrassed to put them and not sure why they have upset me so much. to you all.

Me! It's the uncertainty and the fear of how the hell we'll cope.

Redbonnie I get that feeling too, I wake up and then reality hits me like a punch, I wish I could sleep through this nightmare.

I'm a glass half full person but today for some reason I can't seem to stop crying.
Just me and DH here so only communicating with DC's and DGC's by phone/SM etc so not worrying them, but I suppose just feeling sorry for myself.
Need a good KUTA (kick up the arse)

I am worrying about the vulnerable children out there who have chaotic lives and school is their safe haven .What will happen to them when school closes tomorrow .

No.

I'm feeling it a bit tonight.

Churches have shut. Last Mass tomorrow. That is the base for mist of my social life and friendship.
We've been isolating since Wednesday, so I've missed my usual Mass and socialise with the old folk (Yes I know they should be self-isolating, but they are all pretending they are 10 years younger than they actually are!

I just realised, that actually, when we return to church, many of them may no longer be with us, and we will be back for memorial services. (Not even covid, a lot were ill anyway)

My son is missing last day of year 6.

FaceTime a friend today, nurse, with many health issues. Self-isolating. Coughing her head off. We were praying, but she was in tears. Really got to me.

I do actually which is very unlike me.

As a nurse I am doubting my competency and resilience to deal with this mentally and physically for the long haul. As a lone parent to my DC's with no other family to look after them if something happens to me. As the DM of a severely autistic DS who I can't reassure that we can return to his normal routine any day soon (he has huge anxiety issues regarding routine to start with).

I lost my (relatively young) DM to her MH issues the year before last. For the first time ever I felt pleased in some way that she isn't here, as I know the anxiety around this would have caused her such awful mental torment and I would not have been able to reassure her either. For the first time ever I have thought maybe she was right and is actually better off now .

I also feel confused and tearful seeing the strange combination of kindness and utter selfishness we are seeing from people, the best and worst of some it has uncovered. It almost feels like a battle as.to which side will 'win'. Tough times I'm used to, but not this level of self-questioning and uncertainty on every level - health, money, everything.

I pulled the DC out of school earlier this week ('underlying conditions') and I tried to call the school... had to give the phone to DH as I was totally choked up and again that's very not me!

It just all got very real very quickly, didn't it

But our family are three days in and feeling a bit better, getting used to the new normal. (And we're completely isolating, not just socially distancing.)

I do still have a little cry at reminders of the olden days ...school uniforms still not through the laundry cycle, my calendar reminder for cubs, my gym card lying round, that sort of thing

Monday will be difficult. We’re all going in then will be given a rota of when to come in. If we stay closed til July, I won’t see colleagues again because I’m leaving. My lovely form left today, they were all very hyper and in and out of assemblies, so I barely got a chance to see them.

One of my cheeky boys asked how I was this morning and I had to bite my lip so hard! I am going to volunteer to go in as often as needed, I’ll moulder away in the house!

Today, as we prepared for scaling down our office time, I realised both how much I love my job and more than that, how much I like my colleagues and the laughs we have.

I don't want to work from home every day. At the moment, it feels like the end and I can't imagine normal life.

I am also really sad that my son will be leaving school tomorrow. He won't get to sit his exams, go to his ball, do his DofE gold expedition and myriad other planned things. He loves school - there is no comfort to be had at the moment.

Plus the awful greed and panic buying and selfishness has reminded me that a huge proportion of our society are absolute shits. Depressing.

Sending to everyone tonight, especially those going through such tough times. It really puts things in perspective reading what some of you are experiencing. Wishing you all strength over the coming days.
My wobble today was a small thing. It came when I had to cancel seeing my sibs. Two have respiratory problems and I don’t know how long it will be before we can sit in the same room nattering over a cuppa. Recognising that these simple but precious face-to-face connections are on hold for an uncertain amount of time brought it all home. I’m so looking forward to hugging friends and family again and it will be a long time before it’s taken for granted.

Need a good KUTA (kick up the arse)

I like 'KUTA' .

I have sent an energetic one your way, can you send me an equally energetic one back please

Saying goodbye to my Mum at her dementia care home. She knows me now. Will she still know me in 12 weeks?

And from a mum pov, the rest of the family is looking to me to find them food and entertain them and educate them and be positive while I'm 😱😱 on the inside

I feel quite tearful. Just decided not to see my mum on Mother's Day for the first time in 50 years. I just can't risk it. I feel fine but I dont want to risk seeing her and accidentally passing something on.
DH is getting on my nerves. I don't want to work from home and we've had to cancel a weekend away.
I know there are people worse off but I'm having a wallow!

Plus the awful greed and panic buying and selfishness has reminded me that a huge proportion of our society are absolute shits. Depressing

Yep - this resonates a lot.

Very tear, very out of character for me. Child in Year 6 will walk out of his primary school through the gates for one last time tomorrow, no leavers assembly, no celebration, no hot July day with all the children signing each other's shirts, no growing up trip to PGL, no SATS which they have all been working so hard for and he has gone from performing below to age related.
I'm just gutted, I know in the scheme of things that this is small, but it is huge for the children affected.
And don't get me started on the GCSEs, the A levels, all cancelled and the secondary school leavers with no Prom or celebration. It will be the 2020 generation of kids f**cked by Coronavirus

@*Jocasta2018

for you.

I was very tearful today. My son is autistic and is going crazy. Hates change. It’s really hard. Said goodbye to my Mum and step dad for the next 12 weeks as they’re old and I’ve got heart failure. It’s all felt very scary. On the plus side he Loves homeschooling. I, on the other hand am already exhausted and totally sick of Science- his obsession. 6 hours today. 6! And planning to get up at 6am so we can spend even more time on it tmr. Oh. Goody! Ergh sorry. What a moaner. I’ll get on with it. I suppose we will all have to. I just wish my shopping delivery hadn’t been missing milk, eggs, bread, chicken and potatoes! Hugs for everyone finding today hard xxx

Jocasta

Just worked out that reading some of these comments is not helping matters. Stay strong. We're all tougher than we know - cliched but also very true.

Yes, Stealth. Frightened for my sister, with a serious heart condition, living a long way off and I can't now visit her. Missing other relatives and friends too, and worrying about them. Our elderly neighbour who is a bit 'different' and I am sure doesn't understand the the danger he is in on his long strolls through the town. Everyone I care about seems so vulnerable.

Walking down our local high street this afternoon seeing so many little businesses struggling or closed. All the charity shops shut because they were staffed by elderly volunteers. The world constricting. The possibility of dying or being bereaved. I'm starting to really believe what's happening.

We all have to look after each other. Mumsnet is a comforting place. I hope everyone here pulls through safely. Best wishes to you all and your families.

Me too op. I want to cry.

Ha, you have a point today, am welling up more than ever! Also reminded me that I haven't seen my parents since Christmas, can't go and see them at Easter (over 70
and chest infection) and no idea when I'll see them again.