Anyone else teary tonight

[StealthPolarBear]

It's not like me. It's just hit me.

Oh me. Thank God you said this. We’ve been self-isolating since Monday and it all really got on top of me today.

@KinkyDoritowithsparkleson I’m so sorry - that sounds all kinds of awful. I really hope it’s good news for you.

Very teary here to. DD got into bed with me this morning and the first thing she said was ‘Mummy I’m so sad my school has to close’. I can’t believe they might not be back in til September. Some of the kids went to the park after school and I feel awful saying she couldn’t and we had to keep walking but I’m pregnant and need to stay away from people. It’s all so crap.

I have been very anxious and not sleeping at all yet busy.

Every day it has been like waking up in a Dystopian nightmare. Facing an invisible yet palpable sickness on a sunny day feels like dealing with radiation. We can't see it yet it's been deadly. We can wave but not touch and pretty much evacuate.

I keep thinking of the town Pripyat after Chernobyl.

Today a little girl toddler on the news put it all in perspective for me. She very matter of fact asked 'Has Peppa Pig got the bug?. Mum said 'No' and she carried on.

It just seemed to achieve what a week of mindfulness didn't really touch.

I am doing what I can and when I can;t resolve something I do nothing. Tonight I have been watching An Audience With Billy Connolly and now I am watching National Lampoons Vacation.

I am counting my blessings. I have to. I have done the best I can physically and mentally do.

I felt a bit emotional saying goodbye to colleagues and packing up my things to work from home the other day but apart from that I'm staying afloat. Maybe my brain just isn't letting me think too much about all this yet, it pulls back and distracts itself.

I went for a nap earlier and when I woke up half asleep thought "Gosh, maybe it's not real and I just dreamt it".

Has anyone else had that duvet clutching moment before they turn on their laptops/phones/televisions?

Sending to all those struggling tonight. It hit me pretty hard about 2 days ago and I had some very dark moments but I have to say today I woke up with much more acceptance of the situation/this new way of life, and much stronger. I hope that tomorrow or one day soon anyone struggling tonight will wake up feeling the same x

Yes I was teary this morning on my way to work. Just thinking how life isn’t going to be normal for a while, and after tomorrow, we don’t know how long the kids will be at home, missing their education, friends x

I was yesterday but today ok. I suppose for me, as a nurse life almost goes on as normal. It's a tough job but in some ways it would be worse to be isolated at home or even worse to lose my job and worrying about bills. Time to all pull together now and get through this shit storm as quickly as we can and with minimum deaths. It's going to get worse before it gets better though

I'm devastated for my DTDs missing the last term of Y6. They've worked so hard this last year to get into their senior school and I kept telling them it was all worth it because they would have such fun for the rest of the year, and now they will miss it all. DTD2 is sleeping in my room, coughing and hot, and sad that she's missing bike ability next week and won't be able to wear her summer dress and play 40-40 in the sunshine. She just broke my heart. I am letting the tears run silently because I don't want to wake her. Since her cough started when I was a work today. I am now at home for 2 weeks without warning and didn't say goodbye to colleagues before school closes tomorrow, some of whom are leaving at the end of term. And if I've got a job in 12 months time I'll be amazed. And I know all of this is immaterial when I see the news and think of those that have lost family and I know that some time well be able to look back on it from a good place but now I'm sad and I'm angry and it's so unfair.

Me - I’ve been crying today and compared to lots of people I am very lucky. I can stay home unless going for essential food. We should be ok financially. We have a large garden and a field at the back to exercise in.

Still fucking terrified though so god knows how some are feeling. I have family working in nhs and supermarkets and I just want to scoop them up and hide them away til it’s all over.

I think I’m just on automatic mum mode, all five of mine at home, sad for my son who wont have his last term in his primary but I’m just going with it. I know I must be upset somewhere deep down though as I haven’t been able to sleep since Monday even though I am really tired. Not so worried about my family as we are all low risk but both my parents and my last remaining grandparent are high risk and my brother lives at the opposite end of the country to me. I am very rural, he is in a big, extremely multicultural city and I hate that. Wish he was up here with me.

Kinky, I remember your name of old. So sorry to hear your situation.

I teach year 5/6. Sigh. Youngest dd has (or hasn't) GCSEs, ds is self isolating, dd2 has had important eye hospital appointments cancelled due to all this and is in the middle of an expensive MA that has already been disrupted by strikes and dd1 had a survey on their first house this week - good week to buy a house??? Plus her asthma preventer has run out but her surgery is currently no face to face and not answering the phone or emails!! Plus dh has returned today from an overnight stay in the South of France to repatriate my 91yo dad who wants to be home in the current situation - colostomy for a start - but his 94 yo wife wants to stay with her family. Sad and possibly forever goodbyes this morning before they came back according to dh :( I want something nice to happen please.

I am veering towards anger having been involved in some of the planning for weeks now.

I am genuinely start to feel like this is some sort of social programme of wiping out the vulnerable: saving money and getting the wealth to the younger generation. I am normally so rational. I can’t see what else it is. Our governments approach is senseless. We are planning for disposal of bodies, not dispersal of contagion.

I say I've been more grounded, today, but tomorrow may be DS1's last day at the special school that it doesn't seem 2 minutes since we fought so hard to get him into, in year 5. He's in year 11 and wouldn't get out of bed, this morning. Hopefully, he'll sleep better tonight and go in because that's when they'll make the decision about whether they have the staff and demand for staying open. Many of the pupils are boarders so the situation is more complicated than for DS2's school which is partially open, having sent home medically vulnerable pupils, including much of its 6th form, but determined to stay open as long as possible for emotionally vulnerable kids like DS2.

The boys can't tolerate each other so both being off school with no support for 5 or 6 months would be hell all around. DH has half joked about sending me and DS1 to live with my elderly parents.

Not trivial at all, FreshFancy.That's a painful enough event in calmer times and the fact that you might not get to resolve what happened (even if you don't get back together) means that it will will be hard for you to personally resolve, for a long time. It's a good time to ask you to think about the impartial guidance you would give to a friend, though.

Yep, having been working from home since Monday and am beginning to feel a bit lonely. DS burst into tears when I told him he wouldn't be going to school, football or any of his activities for a while. i keep panicking about food distribution then pull myself together but I have just realised that we probably won't be going to DLP in July, that i probably will lose lots of money (bought flights separately). I know in the general scheme of things it's more important that we are well and safe but I haven't been on a proper holiday in years as have been saving for other things.

It’s surreal isn’t it.

The absolute worst thing about this is the physical isolation. Not being able to come and go with friends and family as we are used to doing.

Companionship and hugs are basic human needs. That’s why this is so tough I think. We’re under enormous stress but we can’t hug it out. Never in living memory have people been so physically estranged from each other.

We’re now in ‘lockdown’ due to DH health issues. We’re ok for food etc because I had a Brexit stash, we live in the middle of nowhere so we can still walk but the sense of

I thought I was coping so well until today. The sadness of realising my dgd doesn't understand that the prom she has been looking forward to wont go ahead, 2 of my dgs's losing their jobs, the selfish greedy bulk buying of others in shops, the fact that I may never get to meet what will be my last dgc due in june, the holiday I was looking forward to in Cornwall with my 2 youngest dgc and all the poor people in care homes that can no longer have visitors, that this will be the first Mothers day I wont see any of my dc's. The thing that tipped me over the edge was the lovely text I had from my window cleaner offering to get shopping or just a chat.

So many lives upset by this fucking virus!

Unconnectedness is really hard.

I’m always the one expected to cope and deal with things at home, with family, for friends and at work. And I have done. But tonight I feel wobbly. I’m not crying ....yet.
I really want my partner to say we will get through this together - mutual support. But I don’t believe he really gets that life has substantially and fundamentally changed, most likely forever.

I feel as if people can depend on me for whatever they need , yet I’ve got no one.
Thank you for starting this thread.

Yep, felt crap all day. Not helped that I barely slept a wink last night

Gutted that both of my children won't finish their schools properly - primary and secondary. Not a biggie in the grand scheme of it, but they've both been excited for this year and now it's over. I'm trying not to make a big deal of it so went out for a drive just so I could have a little cry

It doesn't help that there's loads of other non coronavirus stuff going on and this just feels like the last straw. My work has ended and it was my mental health saviour

I'm hoping that having my children home next week will give me something to focus on..

Really sad and tearful. Hiding it from other half but I am so sad for everyone and terrified for my family, my elderly mother and other close family in the highest risk group. I also have that dreadful feeling of realisation in the morning when I wake up. I just feel sick to my stomach and I am trying to be brave and strong..... It reminds me of the programme years and years, terrifying.

On a positive I cling on to the fact that we won't lose much money over all this ( I walked minimal hours) and we have the luxury that I'm at home to do school stuff with DS2. I can only imagine how other families are coping

And the ds who no longer has any contact with me and I may never see again, my 2 dds who work in health care, one of which is struggling with her marriage break up. Its all just horrible at the moment.

I'm not teary but have that 'lost' feeling. Like after 9/11.

However, the absolute worst thing is all the frontline workers, including my own nearest and dearest who will be dealing with this and putting their own health at risk.

I’m lucky really- just able to hide away.

(If my husband does not soon turn off the constant tv and radio updates tho the entire reason for shutting ourselves away may soon be irrelevant....)!