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. Now I think he was genius.Jenasaurus · 14/03/2020 17:58
If its imminent this wont work, but if you arent standing there with your knickers round your ankles as you post, I know local shops, like my one on the corner still has loo roll so did Londis, its the newsagent type ones that have a bit of everything that may have some
BahHumbygge · 14/03/2020 18:12
The neck of a well-downed goose, held betwixt your legs, according to Rabelais:
“'I have', answered Gargantua, 'by a long and curious experience found out a means to wipe my bum. The most lordly, the most excellent, the most convenient that was ever seen. I have wiped my tail with a hen, with a cock, with a pullet, with a calf's skin, with a hare, with a pigeon, with a cormorant, with an attorney's bag, with a Montero, with a falconer's lure. But to conclude, I say and maintain that of all the torcheculs, arsewisps, bumfodders, tail-napkins, bunghole cleansers, and wipe-breeches, there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose, that is well downed, if you hold her head betwixt your legs. And believe me therein upon mine honour, for you will thereby feel in your nockhole a most wonderful pleasure, both in regard of the softness of the said down and of the temporate heat of the goose, which is easily communicated to the bum-gut and the rest of the inwards, in so far as to come even to the regions of the heart and brains.'"
LilyPond2 · 14/03/2020 18:12
Another one piling in here to say Do not flush kitchen roll down the loo! I saw a programme about this once and this is at high risk of causing blockages. If (when) it does get really bad with lots of people seriously ill, the last thing we want is people unable to maintain basic hygiene because their plumbing is blocked (with massive delays in sorting the problem because one fifth of the workforc is off sick, and those whose job is to clear blockages are massively overworked due to a load of idiots who have all flushed kitchen roll down the toilet)/
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