30s TTC - Our BESH GussetWatch Ever, With Guest Star Joe Mangel!

[Scorpette]

Come on in, you raddled old caaaaahs, whotchoo waitin' for?

I've gone for a groovy 60s psychedelic theme, so get your fat upper arms comfy in the hanging globe chairs and hide your mememe shame in the glow of the lava lamps!

Russell Howard is our new bartender, although I don't think he's happy at the flares 'n' kipper tie outfit I've forced him to wear. And of course, Mitchell is in the pit, nervously awaiting his first guest.

Let's make this one diffalicious!

Sorry, X post Scorps.

Oh god. I have eaten so much food I look like I have won a baybee. Sushi and noodles. I go pop.

Am happy to report that v light droid fucked off so we got to have some sexy fun on our romantic weekend away. Hooray! Also much bubbly. But not tonight as we have eaten ourselves into a stupor. Pass the Rennie.

Oh god. I have eaten so much food I look like I have won a baybee. Sushi and noodles. I go pop.

Am happy to report that v light droid fucked off so we got to have some sexy fun on our romantic weekend away. Hooray! Also much bubbly. But not tonight as we have eaten ourselves into a stupor. Pass the Rennie.

And now I am double posting. Dearie me.

Wanted to give a very large drink to Climbeverymountain. Tis a shit hand you've been dealt.

FairyNuff I went to see the GP sometime last year to get tests started. Mostly thort I was being paranoid. Bloods came back a bit odd, so I was referred to Barts where, after a series of unfortunate tests (inc TNB's sperm test, in which he managed to destroy his iPhone (I didn't ask)) it turned out that I have a blocked tube and wonky hormones and TNB has very few sperms. Basically, evolution is telling us no.

There are a couple of other humans on the boards who are heading toward the great joy of assisted conception. The one thing I am absolutely sure of is that this is random and unfair. It's nothing to do with leaving it too late, or drinking too much in the mid-nineties, or smoking...it just is.

Scorprecious thank you, lovely.

Am off for Whip It and afternoon tea tomorrow. Very excited.

Just back from a friend's house who has 7 week old baybee but he was 5 weeks prem so only 2 weeks really. You know what I mean. He's still so tiny! So teeny weeny. Looked like a very little, cross old man. Bless. We took him on his first evening to the pub. A very gentile, teetotal food pub I hasten to add. On the way home, Husband asked nervously (after having listened to C section, breastfeeding and poo and wee stories) "Do you still want a baby?" I think his feet are a bit chilly.

did you mean gentile, Aries?

Still, he sounds v sweet. I was having second thoughts round a stately home today, as all the kids wanted to do was explore themselves and were getting a bit noisy, but to be fair that was only to be expected.

Oh shit! Do I mean gentille then? But that's got a red squiggly line under it. I mean posh rather than a pub for non-Jews. Think that one's spelt with a G. Anyone Jewish help me out here?

I think I'll shut up and go to bed. Taxi for one .

Genteel, aryannation. That's the word you were after. Did have a brief moment of wondering whether small babies and pubs weren't kosher, mind you. Or whether you meant a gentle pub, filled with relaxing whale song and pastel beanbags.

Hola laydeeeeeeez (in the loosest sense of the word of course). Part time poster here. Apogilees, i have been lurking but not posting due to being menkuler than the King of Menkul at a convention for menkulists.

I have every symptom in the book in my head - the boobs, the funny tummy, the nausea. But then I stop and think... I HAD ALL THOSE SYMPTOMS LAST FUCKING MONTH TOO!!!! And breathe... Fucking hate this TTC shit I do.

Anyhoo, I believe that we have a couple of contenders this month? Been so self obsessed that I can't actually remember who it is now?

Sorry about your news mintyfanny. You're not being punished though, tis just one of dem shit fings that has no rhyme nor reason. Doesn't make it any easier though so have a loving nip twist from me. Pliz not to return the favour though as mine are V sensitive due to impending updiffment .

Greetings to all uvver BESHes old and new. I have it bad this month, I even went over to the PESH board
and sniffed it.

And what the fuck am I still doing awake?

ariesentpollsuggested I don't get too broody with the tiny bubs, it's the 8 months and on ones that get me. I could eat 'em up! Num num num!!!!

Dear me, I genuinely sound a bit bonkers there. Hmmm...

And I'm still awake...

Night night you carazy catz.

Am aghast at my genteel/gentile faux pas and the juxtaposition of the word aryannation.

oh dear Decaff, definitely one of us.

Aries don't panic, was just a typo!

Morning ladies.

Well, am going ahead with my bbq today even though we'll blatantly either have to eat stuff inside or put loads of jumpers on. But feckit, I want burnt meat and burnt meat I'm going to have.

Day 31 of 28/9 cycle here. Tested early on day 28 just in case needed to tell practical tutor at college - BFN. If nothing today will test again in morning. No sign of droid so far. Feel a bit sick but I think that's the effort of keeping my hopes in check and feeling sure of imminent despair rather than hormones.... did just cry at hospital heroes though, but that's just cos I'm stoopid...

POAS today! Right now! G'wan

Yes, Ariana I thought the same! Just an unfortunate coinkidink I am sure. As for gentile / genteel I would have made the same mistake, and I am sure I have been called the both. Well, maybe not genteel . I have always been curious about the origins of both words, so excuse the geekery:

genteel, a. and n.

(dʒɛnˈtiːl)

Forms: 6?8 gentile, 8 gentil, 7? genteel.

[A re-adoption, at the end of the 16th c., of F. gentil, which had been previously adopted in the 13th c., and had assumed the form gentle.
The re-adoption first appears in the form gentile, distinguished from gentile (= non-Jewish) by retaining the Fr. pronunciation of the i and the stress on the last syllable. It is probable that it was originally fashionable to retain the Fr. nasal sound in the first syll.; hence the vulgar pronunciation represented by the spelling ?jonteel?, which occurs in comic literature of the early 19th c. The fully anglicized spelling genteel came in at the end of the 17th c.; see also gentee, which corresponds more nearly to the pronunciation of the Fr. word, in which the l is silent. Another attempt to render the Fr. sound is jaunty.
A few years before the middle of the 19th c. the word was much ridiculed as being characteristic of those who are possessed with a dread of being taken for ?common people?, or who attach exaggerated importance to supposed marks of social superiority. In seriously laudatory use it may now be said to be a vulgarism; in educated language it has always a sarcastic or at least playful colouring.]

Now that I have got that geek urge out of me, let us go back to menkuling. How far down the WOOFL line are you Decaffcoffeestain?

Sorry x post Cassie, I would say POAS as we all want a BFP, but maybe your reasonable self is right: wait for those hormones to build up till tomorra. Or just POAS because we are all menkul and that's just it.

I'm going to wait until 2more; I feel too fragile to take a BFN today and that's probably what it would get, not being first thing in morning and all that. Have sent the H out to Tescos to buy some for tomorrow (along with MEAT MEAT MEAT) so just the act of purchasing will almost certainly alert the droid to begin beeping.

Our friends are coming round tonight who have been TC for over a year now. I almost want droid to come so I don't have to tell them we're pg. It's only been 8 months for us, plus we have DS, so our worst case scenario is nothing like theirs (and most of yours).

They've just had tests that have shown he has sperm but not great looking ones (their words) - any advice? Read earlier about no caffeine, booze and know about zinc etc. Any other things you've been told I can pass onto them tonight?

Right. Must hoover.

menkulmenkulmenkulmenkul (to tune of technotechnotechnotechno, for those old enough)

Big slaps with hunks of charred beef to the lot of ya.

Sorry, not that I'd be telling these friends tonight, obviously. Just been dreading having to At Some Point if we manage it before they do, given that they are blatantly miles ahead in the rightful baybee winning queue.

Oooh, technotechnotechno. I lived in Germany at the time. Imagine the amount of techno there. Almost as much as menkul now.

No advice on the spunk side yet. Though I could use some advice: how do you get them to give you exact results? They, as in GP, didn't give them to the CH, and we just had a chat and he said:"What use would it do anyway?" To me it would make a huge difference knowing just how bad it is! Well, I'll insist when I see the GP next week, but CH almost felt I was being unreasonable .

POAS tomorrow Casster! I will be chanting it to the techno tune! Well, you can't call it a tune really...

I would just ask them to write the results down, say that you find it hard to digest stuff instantly and would like the chance to be able to read it through again later. Which is true, anyway!

I think that would defntely be helpful - both in terms of ascertaining how bad it is but also exactly what it is. Then you can google with a bit more informity (tho I don't think that's actually a word...)

Will it be the same GP next week and will CH be with you? Might be worth just checking that they will give YOU HIS results - data protection and all that shiz. Just in case they're a bit fuckwitted about that sort of thing. Would hate for you to go expecting to be able to get them and be disappointed. Perhaps CH could ring up and ask for them over phone before you go, then you can google beforehand and then ask any questions you've got when you're there?

What day are you there? Just so we can remember to ask you how it went...

Well, the GP he spoke to has just left the practice! Didn't even know that until I made an appointment. So I have an appointment with some new geezer next Thursday, because I wanted to get the FC ball rolling. But to be honest, neither of these is our regular GP, who is amazing and therefore super popular, and he has sent us for tests in the first place (we go to others not to have 2 month gaps each time) and I have a previous appointment with him on May 27th (made a month ago, that's how popular he is) for something else, so I may just use that appointment to drag the hubby in and chat more. He knows us for years so I thought he'd be the best one to talk to. Can you just show up as a couple to the GP's to an appointment one of you made?

You are right about the time to process: the more I think about it the more I think urologist is worth it.

Perhaps I should wait till May 27th. I don't know, I just made this earlier appointment after the GP said:"Tell your wife to make an appointment next week".

Anyway, I am going into too much detail and menkuling here. Forgive me all. I will now dissapear into the world of books and stop bothering innocent BESHies who I am sure just want some gin of a bank holiday Monday. Workers unite and all.

Big kicks.