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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Assisted Conception (and the bits in between) Volume 5

1000 replies

Bumpless · 23/03/2010 10:02

Thought I'd set us up a new home! kettle's on and choc tin open.

This is a lucky start to our new thread: 2 BFPs and a fantastic fertilisation rate from Dueling!

Boobs and biscuits to everyone

OP posts:
poppy75 · 26/06/2010 08:51

Hello guys just had to tell you all! Did my test today and I got a BFP .

Was so scared it was wrong I had to do another but yes there was definately two lines on the tester!! So happy that all the effort of IVF was worth it. But still a little cautious as have been here before (4 years ago) so still keeping my fingers crosed. I do feel positive this time and am going to let myself daydream and enjoy the moment for a while before I start thinking of things that might never happen!

Hope this gives hope to everyone else that even after a long time things can happen -

Loujalou · 26/06/2010 10:21

Congrats Poppy I am new to the thread and don't know your back story but 2 lines are 2 lines!

MountTheFairy · 26/06/2010 11:18

Yeeeey! Excellent news Poppy!

babybarrister · 26/06/2010 12:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Horton · 26/06/2010 14:37

Fantastic news, poppy! STicky vibes in enormous quantities to you!

LissySilver · 26/06/2010 16:25

Poppy--WOO-HOO!!! Think positive and happy thoughts, girlie...

Horton--How you doing, sweetie?

MM--I'm on the edge of my seat here!

Italian--Thanks for your comments, I really appreciate them. I promise that my DH has really been upping his game, and we have been getting along so well. Which makes it perfect that I leave on Wednesday, if you know what I mean. I have no idea what getting a free cycle at UCH entails. It was kind of said in passing by my consultant, but intend to get more in depth details when I go for my results on Tuesday.

In the meantime, the antibiotics have kicked in, but they make me feel very icky, so I'm trading pain for ickiness. Believe me, there's no contest. Will hopefully post on Tuesday with the results.

Sending positive, sticky vibes to all of you jewels out there (as Italian called me), and big hugs and kisses as well.

MercenaryMom · 26/06/2010 20:58

Good evening all.

Poppy that is fantastic news! Congratulations! Enjoy your BFP and try not to worry about the negative things that could happen, but more likely will not! You've been through a lot - enjoy it!

Italian and Penguin enjoy your holidays. Penguin don't write off your cycle just yet... I'm sending you positive, sticky vibes!

LissySilver I'm glad the pain has gone, even if you're feeling a bit yucky on the antibiotics. And its good that you and your DH are getting on better - it will make your upcoming trip much more relaxed.

As for me...We had the EC on Friday. All went well and they collected 17 eggs! I was really happy when we left the clinic.

Unfortunately, that hasn't lasted. The clinic was supposed to call today to let us know how many had fertilised. After spending the whole day with my phone in my hand, they called at the one 5 minute period when I was unreachable and left a very vague voicemail about having an appointment at the clinic on Monday 9am. She didn't say how many (if any) had fertilised or even if the appointment was for an ET! And it was a 'blocked' number so I couldn't call her back - and the clinic is of course closed on the weekend...

I am freaked out because we had planned to go for blastocysts - and with 17 eggs, I thought we'd have a good chance. But now I have no idea what is going on. Is the appointment on Monday for ET? Or to tell me that none of the eggs fertilised / embryos survived? Or did the woman who called not know we planned to try for blasts? I could go on and on - my imagination has been running wild all afternoon.

I did call the emergency IVF duty doctor at the clinic, but he wasn't able to provide any more information. He promised to get someone to phone me tomorrow (Sunday), so I'm hoping someone does...

And to make matters worse, I've had a lot of pain post-EC and my tummy is so bloated that I barely fit into any of my clothes. So, I'm feeling generally miserable and sorry for myself. DH seems very complacent about the whole thing and keeps telling me I'm over-reacting and shouldn't worry until we know... but after all I've just gone through, it seems cruel not to tell me what has happened! Who leaves a voice message about something like that?! She didn't even try to call back or ring my home number...

Enough ranting. I'm just glad you're all here, because I'm sure you'll understand!

Italiangreyhound · 26/06/2010 23:35

Poppy huge congrats. See testing on the right day was a good idea!

MM calm down (said in a Liverpool accent)! It will be OK. I am sure. I can't imagine all 17 didn't fertilise, so I am sure you have some and it is just the dopy person who called did not realise what a bldy monumental thing all this is. I would suggest, just an idea, you get out to the shops tomorrow and take your mind off it all by buying a nice floaty hippy dress to hide that bloat and you can use it if/when you get pregnant, go for something orange, Zita West likes orange for fertility! I know, KNOW, how frustrating it is when DH does not join us in getting upset about things. My dh does not get upset about anything and it drives me MAD! But as he always said, would you want me to get all upset too, maybe it would not help! I guess you will just have to hang on the phone tomorrow and see if they do call back tomorrow. If they don?t, you can always call them again if it is an emergency number. Then on Monday you can go in for 9.00 and see what they say. Please try and be calm, I am sure that the person who phoned didn't know about blastocycts thing or maybe the docs think it is better to go for ET Monday. Who knows! But you are right to get freaked out, it is amazingly stressful! Love and hugs Angelina! Lissysilver hope you are feeling better. My DH has his good times and at the moment is being wonderful, picked an amazing chalet for us in France so he can do a run up a mountain. We have internet access in our French chalet! Whoop whoop!

Horton how are you? Choco what are your plans? Penguin good luck?
This last week has been quite hard. I felt a bit like I was falling to bits! Kept crying and getting sad! One friend who I do love was a bit insensitive in what she said, I know a lot of people think I should just accept this is how it is meant to be! Which I find hard to do. I am a Christian and at times it has tested my faith a bit to have these repeated attempts and not get anywhere! I must admit I am so grateful for my wonderful dd - even if she does drive me mad! She has started being quite naughty - which I put down to her not having sibs and therefore getting her own way more than is strictly necessary!

In some ways I feel that we have not had that many attempts because after DD was born we had about half a dozen IUI attempts at two different clinics and one IVF attempt that did not go anywhere but we were told after the first IUI we would not be able to get anywhere with my rubbish eggs! So in some ways I sort of feel our one attempt with donor eggs was our only attempt!

MercenaryMom · 27/06/2010 20:27

Italian I'm sorry you've been feeling so down lately. It is such a difficult decision. On the one hand, you don't want to give up too soon, on the other you don't want to stop enjoying what you have by spending all your time thinking about what could be... All I can suggest is to take your time, talk it all thru with your DH and come to a decision you both can live with. Although I appreciate its easier said than done...

And thank you also for the calm, Liverpool accent. I was worried about nothing. They called today to say that 12 had fertilised and that they'd assumed I was going to have a day 2 embryo transfer because the consultant apparently forgot to put on our file that we wanted to try for blasts.

Anyway, they're going to call tomorrow to let us know how the poor little embies are holding up. If all is well, we'll have ET on Wednesday, but if they're looking stressed, we'll do it tomorrow. Feeling much calmer about the whole thing now. Oh, and DH has been told he's not allowed to say "I told you so"!

BabyB- how's your cycle going? Aren't you coming up for an EC too?

Hope the rest of you are enjoying the lovely weekend. Big waves and lots of chocolate ice cream with hot fudge sauce to you all!

Italiangreyhound · 27/06/2010 20:34

MM Wonderful news

You can name them after the 12 tribes of Israel or the 12 disciples or gthe 7 dwarfs and still have a few names over! Only joking! I named all mine and now feel sad when I see a laurel leaf! My DD said today (chat about babies and adoption) she wanted one called Daisy (sister) and I wanted to laugh as I love that name and DH had a dog called Daisy as a child so had vetoed that name!

Anyway, thanks for your kind words. Can you fit into your clothes now?

Let's hope you won't be able to soon!

babybarrister · 27/06/2010 20:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Keziahhopes · 27/06/2010 22:27

Poppy that is amazing news

MountTheFairy - I first saw the FC (or rather a good junior dr and consultant popped in for 2 mins to decide what tests to do!) and got ordered following tests: transvaginal scan, day 3 and day 21 (correctly the 7days post ovulation) blood tests, other bloods, chlamydia test for me (normal procedure apparently), SA for dh ... and 12 weeks to next apt. At 2nd apt they noticed my dh's SA which was his 2nd was much much worse - so ordered a 3rd, hormone blood tests for him and a HSG for me. Frustratinglty this other dr didn't discuss the results of the TVG with me, only reading the print out I learnt to ask for did I find I have a cyst area and a 15mm fibroid. Now waiting for HSG and dh's 3rd SA and go back end of July to get our treatment plan discussed. Someone I know under same consultant got HSG ordered first time - which would have saved lots of time for me, but in end we have to wait for dh's SA and tests, and no apt for 4 weeks for his SA strangely!

MTF - I know of someone else under same consultant - whose BMI was high and she was told to get it under 35 to start clomid (she has) this month. For IVF/ICSI she told had to be under 30, nearer 26 - but don't know about IUI.

Italiangreyhound · 27/06/2010 22:48

Mountthe fairy My BMI was 35 for fertility treatment BUT it it more likely to work if it is lower. I think optimum is between 20 and 25 (soemoen might be able to confirm that!). I mean oprimum normal weight.

MountTheFairy · 28/06/2010 09:40

Very glad you have good news MM!

Kezia, Italian, my BMI is currently 28, so not too bad I guess, but the GP was very firm on it being in the optimum range! (20 - 25)

Well, starting a new healthy regime today, both hubby and I and let's hope that works! I am going to get us some vitamins too.

Kazia, frustratingly, I have had those tests, many times, so it will be annoying to have to go through them again. Long story, but I am used to regular gyno exams (Germany, USA) so sometimes I still go back and pay for them. Last set was about a year ago, but I am thinking they'll want to do their own tests here which means months of waiting! DH does need more tests though...

What is HSG?

MountTheFairy · 28/06/2010 09:46

P.S. I am not German! I thought that needed to be said after yesterday .

Loujalou · 28/06/2010 12:09

MounttheFairy a BMI of 25 - ouch. Am a size 12 but still about 29 according to the Wii (that is why I now keep away from it!) and overweight. But then I like to blame my rather top heavy body shape for that rather than being too fat. Hopefully before we get anywhere near a FC I will get pregnant but also am going to gym twice a week.

My German friend was telling me they have really regular smears over here and she was shocked how slack they are over here.

Keziahhopes · 28/06/2010 21:43

MTF - I have been told for NHS funding need BMI of 20-25 too, as my PCT very strict on that ... gone from 29/30 to 28, so working on it! My dh is 22, so ok there! But he now on 2 brazil nuts every day for selenium and Wellman's vitamins for conception! It takes 3 months for new supply of semen, so have his next test in July. The hospital told us need tests 6mths old or newer.

Wow, Italian your hospital were great - they do clomid here for 35 or under, but not IVF/ICSI at that.

MTF a HSG is name of the test to check fallopian tubes, blockages etc. Already had the transvaginal scan to rule out PCOS (have cyst area, but no PCOS!)

Horton · 28/06/2010 21:58

Heh, the BMI thing is nuts. I was nearly refused treatment a few years back because mine was too low at 17.5 (I got pregnant naturally a couple of months later and DD is now nearly four).

MM, many congrats, that sounds v positive.

Lissy hope you are doing okay.

I'm fine, thanks to all who asked. I just need to get my head round the possibility (probability) of failure when we try another IVF cycle. I think I might just be too old. We can't try again at the moment as we have too many holidays booked - so it's not all bad!

EC is fine, BB, hope yours goes really well. Apparently I told the nurses I was really enjoying it when out of my head on the drugs they give you (don't worry, you won't remember any of it)!

MountTheFairy · 28/06/2010 22:59

Lou when is your doctor's appointment? This Thursday? Yes, I share the shock with your friend, and it is not just the smears... but then I don't know. I guess every system has it's own.

Kezia ouch! I better get on with my healthy regime! I have been BMI 25 or less not that long ago (1 - 1.5 yrs) so know I can get back there. Did they actually tell you to go back when at 25, or did your GP tell you this? Hubby on Wellman too, and I will go vitamin shopping for myself tomorrow. Maybe Sanatogen and Wheatgrass. What is meant to help a short luteal phase? Oh, and thanks for explaining HCG, I have never had that!

Hello Horton .

Keziahhopes · 29/06/2010 00:35

Horton - the idea of holidays sound nice.

MTF - no wasn't told to wait until BMI was 25, as tests etc take time, but as dh and I both identified now with problems, I found out what the restrictions for NHS treatment were in my area (1 cycle only, health BMI in 20-25range) .. they may be more lenient in other areas possible. I joined Slimming World in the end as I wanted to lose it healthily and not be cutting things out - in 5 weeks am pleased with my loss (9.5lbs)

Did anyone find they had a cyst/fibroid and need treatment before fertility treatment continued? The dr didn't tell me I had these, but I read the report she gave me and I have a cyst area and a small fibroid. Don't know whether this an issue or not?

Italiangreyhound · 29/06/2010 00:39

Keziahhopes why were my clinic great? Because they treated me with a high BMI? We had to pay for treatment, we never got any treatment free. We were late 30s before we started and never really looked at NHS treatment, our initial treatment was IUI and it was only £300 a go!

MM any news?

Horton laughing at idea of you saying you are enjoying egg collection! Why do you say next cycle would fail? How old are you, can I ask?

Loujalou, Mountthefairy, Penguin,BB, Lissy and all sending you all best wishes

MountTheFairy · 29/06/2010 08:20

Kezia, thanks for the tip, now I checked restrictions in my area. They seem very lenient: 3 free treatments and BMI 19 - 30 kg/m2 (I never knew it was kg/m2!). Well done on your weight loss! Sounds great to me! I am also now trying to do it healthily without cutting out things, so let's see... I am sorry, I do not know anything about cysts or fibroids, but can it be the case that this is not an issue if dr did not mention it?

Loujalou · 29/06/2010 08:42

Mount it was supposed to be last Thursday but the results for the second test still haven't been received by the doctors so we are going to go anyway now and discuss the first set of results. Maybe get the ball rolling. Looks like I might try Weight Watchers. We will see what the doctors say.

Cerubina · 29/06/2010 09:06

Hi all

Just back from holiday last night and I fortunately booked this morning off as holiday and working from home this afternoon, so I have time to put the house in order and catch up on important stuff like this thread!

Have just spent about 30 mins reading back to see what you've all been up to while I was away.

Firstly, congratulations to Poppy on your BFP! That is fantastic news and I really hope you have a problem-free pregnancy and can put any fears out of your mind. Good luck and let us know how your scans go.

Also congrats and good luck to Amber on the twins news. I hope the bleeding has disappeared now and allowed you to relax a little, but I can imagine what a terror it is.

Italian, it sounds as though you have had many wobbles over the last few weeks and getting away for a holiday would be a good idea, so I hope it does you and your OH and DD good. Try to just "be" for a few days, don't overthink things and tell yourself that you have to decide right away between adoption and trying again. I think you need a bit of a break from all that, it is obviously stressing your mind and it sounds as though you are trying to force yourself to be happy with adoption when emotionally something is stopping you from fully embracing it. Deep breaths my friend, enjoy some quality family time and be kind to yourself too.

Mojangles! I was actually thinking about you while I was away and wondering how you were getting on. Please come back and see us again. Sorry that you had some depression and angst after your scans but hope it has settled down and you can enjoy being a pregnant lady, you did enough to earn it.

Was also wondering about GGG and wondering where she is...are you there? Are you contemplating a FET yet?

Penguin, good luck for the 2WW and try not to write off the cycle as someone else said. If you were distracted by work that need not be a bad thing, sometimes I think our wombs like us to be focusing on something else for a while and not giving them our undivided attention. When I got pg in January I was stressed out trying to organise our renovations and moving into rented accommodation, so it need not be a problem!

MM good luck for continued embie growth and ET shortly. You had a good haul from EC and I'm glad the complicated logistics with your OH worked out fine. I know what you mean about the difference in male and female perspectives in all this and would imagine your OH has needed huge praise for playing his role (getting on a plane) compared with yours (running the household, looking after your DC, injecting, clinic visits...). My DH is a wonderful person and very supportive on everything, but apparently not giving IVF a second thought! Perhaps he is trying to keep worries at arm's length, but at the moment it is clear all the thinking and planning about it is going on in my head and very much NOT in his. I'm sure he will get on board in the end, but I think at the moment it's a purely theoretical exercise for him.

BB I'm very excited that you are finally almost at EC after what seems like a really long run-up. If it feels long to me, it must be a lifetime to you! Fingers crossed no further samples are needed from your OH given the difficulties there - let us know how you get on.

Ginger, Idream and Horton - hugs for you all and I'm so sorry to hear that you have all had hard times of late. I know this infertility lark does leave us all feeling isolated and full of hate/jealousy/stress, nasty emotions that are hard to acknowledge and hard to dig ourselves out of. Hope you all have a good friend somewhere who you can talk to in real life and that you all know you can come on here and rant, offload and cry. It is time for you all to have some good luck now so when you are ready to move forward I'm sure you will do so.

Lissy sorry to hear about the infection after your biopsy but hope the anti-biotics are getting that under control. It must feel good to think that that difficult step is out of the way, and hopefully you will have good news from the docs (I presume you have more appointments to check progress?) and in a few months will be able to try again. Enjoy your trip back to the US!

Hello to newbies vadercat, Kezia and Loujalou. It can feel very daunting being told that you need assisted conception but everyone on here is unanimous that the process needn't be that bad so I believe them! Unless there is a conspiracy and they are all doctors masquerading as barren women! It is also difficult to be told that there are things wrong with you or your OH when you see friends getting on with their families so easily, but I do believe a lot of the time the experience makes us stronger than people who haven't been tested in the same way, and I hope we will all get there in the end.

This is already long but my update is that I am now on day 15 of birth control pills (yes, as predicted my period came on day 1 of my holiday! If I hadn't been given the all clear to make a start while out of the country, I'd have been howling in rage at the predictability of it). On Friday I have my scheduling appointment at the clinic so I guess will start the sniffing shortly after.

We had a fabulous holiday - Egypt was unbelievably hot but we love the sun and got very brown, the sights were fascinating, and we both feel thoroughly relaxed which was much needed. You can blame me for the rain this morning in the London area - I only got back last night and seem to have broken the drought! Sorry...

Hugs and choccy biccies to all (sorry, they are some dodgy Egyptian things with pistachios and apricots, not proper chocolate either...)

KC11 · 29/06/2010 15:10

kezia Hi. I had a huge fibroid 6 years ago. I had surgery to remove it. yours sounds like a little one and they'll not take action/ operate if you're trying to conceive. It can become troublesome if it grows to the six of an orange as mine did. I don't have any children yet but I'm working very hard on that. Been trying for over 5 years now, 3 nhs IUIs and 3 nhs IVFs behind me. No known cause of infertility and apparently that's quite common. Annoying though if someone told me there was no chance I could perhaps move on.

I'm 36 and I beleive my BMI is 24 or 25. I think. I am just about to get AF but i still hope every month that it won't come. DH says I am stressed and it won't happen if i'm stressed. It's him and his DIY or lack of actually getting the work and jobs indoors done that pees me off. He is the source of stress much of the time. Very diificult to nag and then try to be intimate and into the whole idea of sex. I don't really seem to want sex all that much but i do realise that's how you get preggers!!!! Tee Hee. I too am on a healthy eating regime. Self-organised. It can only be good right? Shame DH won't adopt my mindset. He will not eat salad unless it lettuce leaves smothered in sweet chilli sauce!!!! He won't eat any other salad item. He has a real thing for chocolate and cream cakes. His BMI is 26 according to a recent health check at his work place. His SA was low the first time but normal after that. He will however take Wellman vitamin tablets every day but moans that they taste funny. It must be terrible having to take one tablet a day that tastes a bit crap compared to all the injections and vaginal progesterone cream and everything that I had to endure. Men!!!!!!!

I really really want a family. I can't think about the future with no children. I don't really see the point of existing if you don't have family. I really want to make my parents grandparents and I want to have children and grandchildren to come and visit me when I'm old and frail.

I'm only 36 so there's still time for me and DH yet. He's 41 by the way.

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