To TTC or not to TTC, that is one of the many questions...

[YorkshireTeaDrinker]

Ok fellow ditherers, as we have filled up one thread (and still not made too many firm decisions) here's another one for us to continue to procrastinate and worry on.

Here's to more monitoring of relative green and redness, mutual support and occassional chivving, discussion of everything baby or not baby related, and perhaps even our first BFP...?

Thanks so much, folks. Feeling a bit ridiculous - I actually must be getting more sleep than that, anyway, or I'd have collapsed by now. Slept a bit better last night and was much calmer when I wasn't asleep - must have been all the MN vibes reaching me...

Those kitties were very cute. I think I'd be a dog person if anything, and DH is horribly allergic to cats, but they did give me a little pang.

Hmm, I'm trying not to dwell on the fact that I might have done the whole kid thing a lot earlier and more easily (not that it's at all clear I'm doing it now - must bear that in mind!) if I'd drunk less. But never mind, that's the past, and I've been uber-clean living for weeks and weeks now (obviously), which has not actually been the stretch I thought it would be. When I have had sips of wine from DH's glass it's suddenly tasted quite strong and potentially toxic (my super ego really does rule me with a rod of iron, doesn't it?!) so have backed away pronto. I suspect if I don't turn out to be pregnant that I'll have a week or two making the most of the fact, however, as a very small consolation!

Right, off to read about the parietal cortex. Thanks again, you iz the best.

Hi All

Thanks for your kind comments, HP like the way that you actually knew the proper name for them, its just blood tests here and there to me at the moment!

LST is it possible you can try to get your body into a bit of a routine with going to bed? It is really as boring as it sounds but helped me massively when I had the work stress going on as I would wake up in the middle of the night every night. You need to wind your mind & body down before you hop into bed, so sorry that probably means no chat on here before bed too and trying to go at the same time every evening.

confused pleased for your that you could be open with your BIL and his wife, its nice when you can actually tell people how you feel rather than pretending. Does anyone have a relationship with their parents where they tell them everything? Strangely I think my mother would be one of those that thinks I do or at least wishes I would but no way!

HP ah! cute kittens! We got our two as kittens 3 years ago. Has prepared us for parenthood as much as possible. particularly as DH always has a "now we don't scratch the carpet in the hallway, do we boys?" conversation with the cats nearly every morning!

Morning!

Hope everyone had a good nights sleep, especially LST. We are having a lazy day today as the weather is rubbish and there are sporting events on TV for DH.

There does seem to be some conflicting advice about drinking and TTC out there. As a scientist, in these situations I always look at the studies with the largest number of participants as that gives more reliable statistics, and also make sure that confounding factors were accounted for, such as age, fertility probs etc (as described in the BBC one). At the end of the day, as an individual you have to decide what is acceptable for you, as population studies can only give predictions and risk.

On the subject of red/green/whatever, I had a weird experience the other night. I got up to go to the loo and in my sleepy dazed state had what I can only describe as complete fear wash over me, and I thought 'OMG, I can't have a baby, it will really hurt and I don't ever want to do it'. Then stumbled back to bed and fell asleep. Now, clearly I wasn't in my right mind -or was I and it was a bizzare moment of clarity? Sounds funny now when I write it out, but it felt very 'real' at the time.

I'm so glad I have another appointment with gynae doc, as I just won't stop bleeding. Period ended four days ago, had one day of nothing, now I'm heavy spotting/bleeding again. Bit rubbish, and bit worried. Sorry if that was a bit much for a Sunday morning!

Right, I'm off to google H. Bridge and look for suitable locations for a cattery.

HP maybe there's something in the fact that you didn't have a "OMG I don't ever want to share my life with a child" moment. Complete fear of, and never wanting to experience, horrific agonising pain is completely normal. Christ only knows how anyone, let alone almost everyone, overcomes it!

I read that Anne Enright book that you recommended by the way. Her account of birth is horrendous (although I noted with some relief that later in the book she recounted passing out following a minor surgical procedure on her neck as well) but her account of the experience of actually raising a baby/child seemed quite positive.

Morning all! Nope, no hangover from this end(for once!) although I did wake up convinced it was Monday (and how lovely it was when I realised it wasn't!)

Telling parents everything? Hmmm. I get on great with my mum and speak to her most days. But would I tell her everything? And would she want to know everything? I doubt it. There are certain things that are a bit ikky to share with your parents (and they probably find the combination of their off-spring and sex about as palatable as we do with the idea of them having sex) really, don't you think? According to BIL and his wife, their daughters have always been very open about that side of things with them but he also seems to think that his eldest daughter didn't sleep with her first boyfriend until they had been together 'nearly a year' which I find a bit unlikely myself. He was also saying how they would never touch drugs whereas I have actually seen a pic of one of them at Glastonbury with remarkably starry looking eyes and clutching a bottle of water so am not convinced of that one either.

I think, in reality, their daughters share what they want to share with their parents but also tailor it to what they think their parents might want to hear. Which is exactly what DH and BIL do with their mum and dad.

LST delighted to hear you had a good nights sleep! Well, at least a better one.

I do worry a bit about the drinking and fertility side of things myself too. I am not a huge pisshead but I have to admit, and hopefully LST you can relate to this (I also think we have discussed this before) that it is easy to drink far more than the recommended 14 units a week without realising. At the moment we've been pretty bad at drinking in the week but we normally try not to, but do then tend to have too much over the weekend. As I am now no loner the spring chicken I once was (alas) maybe I need to be a bit more restrained.

Bugger.

On the other hand, we do eat well (rarely processed, make sure plenty of veg etc) and walk a hell of a lot due to both the dog and walking to work. I think compared to 'average' we do far more exercise but then I guess 'average' is really bloody low. And, while I SO wish this wasn't the case, I am still slightly overweight and it's so much bloody harder to get the excess off when you're older (older-ish).

Think I've managed to gloom myself right out now!

ps HP SP sorry I forgot to say, hope the gynae appt goes okay and it's nothing too sinister. Also, re your moment of clarity - perhaps it was your subconscious speaking to you in your half awake state? I know I'd be gutted if I couldn't, although that doesn't make me get my finger out and start trying right now. Maybe you are the same?

Oooh, someone outside the house and have been for about fifteen minutes. There is now someone else with them and they are looking round and taking pics.

As long as they are potential housebuyers rather than potential burgulars it's very promising indeed...

I guess the good thing about drinking levels and TTC is it that it's something that can be adjusted. What I mean is, some things can't be changed, like your egg quality or hormone levels, but wine consumption can. If it is a concern. I'm not a big drinker at all but do enjoy a glass of wine every couple of weeks, which I guess isn't pickling my ovaries too badly. I was laughing a bit at the implication that drinking more leads to more sex therefore more babies!

Am also that parents think their kids tell them everything. Please. Maybe kids do if there isn't much to tell....

Anne Enright also had a second baby! So the horrors were repeated. I found her writing to be haunting and a bit scary!

Just spent a horrible ten mins dry heaving over the loo. Something is def up with my hormone levels.

Cross post! Hope it's housebuyers!

Yes, I would be gutted to find out there is a problem, but still can't find the balls desire to go for it.

How do you know it's hormone levels and not something like a bug?

Am now Googling Anne Enright.

I am assuming hormones rather than bug as I have no other bug symptoms and in combination with the crazy bleeding it may be more likely to be that. Plus, it was the smell of lunch that set me off.

Oooh, sounds weird. I have never had any hormone weirdness so cannot start to guess what it may be.

The smell of lunch setting you off sounds a bit weird though! If it wasn't for the constant bleeding I'd be sending Mr HP SP to the chemists!

You feeling a bit better now you've been sick? And, and sorry to cluck, but you making sure you get enough iron? Esp with all this crazy bleeding and being veggie...?

It's a good point. I'm taking B12, but I could do a haemoglobin test at work to make sure that is ok.

Feel a lot better, thanks. Seems to have passed. I think some people just get bouts of sickyness at different points in the month. I might be one of those. Will check with doc though.

Are the people still there?

They have gone, but they went a while back then turned up again with someone else so they may come back yet again? It looks very promising from the way they were looking around. Luckily today there is lots of parking space and, as we are on a dead end anyway, NO traffic at all (and hardly any trains - we overlook a train track at the end of some allotments and, while you don't notice them when you are in the house, you might think you will if you are hanging about outside.)

Is any of this helpful? Realise you can just as easily look yourself but thought I'd have a look on your behalf all the same.

To be honest, I have never heard of anyone having bouts of sickiness at different times in the month but, like I said, I am not that clued up re hormones as I've never really needed to be.

pssst!

Hopefully they will come back or contact the estate agent for a proper look. I bet it's common for people to have an unofficial look at a house and area before making an appointment. Fingers crossed! Or indeed GOOD LUKC!

Thanks so much for looking into it for me. Looks like it is a common problem. Whilst I can't recall my source for the sickiness info, I'm sure I read it somewhere . It seems the best thing to do is see a doctor. I hope she does want to do something to look into it, although I'm not in love with the idea of being poked and prodded.

OMG - is that your house?! It's gorrrrgeous! I love the kitchen, and it looks so spacious and well decorated!

Watch out, I'll be putting an offer in!!

We are wondering if it is the couple who have already been to see it three times. They had an air about them that seemed to suggest they were double checking rather than seeing it for the first time. I do hope so as really want to move now asap. Don't feel as if this house is our own any more - not with all these people traipsing through it and having to be ridiculously tidy.

Poked and prodded - ugh! Am with you there but hopefully it will be the quickest prod and poke (!) you've ever had! That's the (one of the) things that gets me about having a baby - half the world looking up your gussett. And, more so, the fact that you don't care!! Christ, what must it be like for you not to care when you're in a compromising legs akimbo position?

Euw!

Yup, it's ours and that's the kitchen that took forever to do! (We had to damp-proof the smaller bit off the kitchen so the contents of that smaller bit were all in the bigger bit - it was horrendous!)

I do love it but the next house will be just as lovely. It's admittedly not as big room-wise, but it's on three floors so actually has the same amount of floor space if you add it all up.

It's hard not to take things personally when you get feedback from the people who've come to see it. One man, who the agent said was very odd anyway, said he was potentially interested but only if we could provide a quote for 'complete re-wiring, re-plumbing and re-decoration.' Humph! Needless to say, we didn't bother! I think he was trying to invent problems so he could get it for silly money as he had done the same with a house on for £295,000 - he offered £190,000 and, funnily enough, got turned down...!

Hopefully will be referred for a nice dignified blood test. Have seen mentions on other threads about dildocams, and poor LST must have endured all manner of prodding during the last few months. At least in labour you are 1. In pain and 2. Expecting to get it all out.

Still having bathroom envy over your lovely bath.

Cheeky git, I'm glad you told him to get stuffed. I'm all for realistic pricing but that's just stupid. Complete redecoration indeed

DILDOCAMS?!

Dear god!

I used to love our bathroom but would now give my right arm for a bloody shower! So much quicker (the bath takes 10 mins just to run it) and easier - bending over the bath to wash my hair isn't one of my favourite jobs I have to say! With our new house we're going to get the same bath but will also have the space (and cash to install) a seperate shower as the bathroom will be in what is currently the spare bedroom (the bathroom in the new house is, weirdly, in the attic at the moment and is a lovely shade of avocado... cracked avocado at that!)

Can't wait to rip into it though and start doing it up. It can't come soon enough!

Cross post! Cheeky git indeed! I was especially irritated by the complete redecoration bit - and how would he even know if it had to re-wired and so on. Did he stay for a bath?!

Tsk!

Apparently they mount the camera-jobby on the end of a probe (ie dildo) and use it to get a better view of the old innards. It's probably not as bad as it sounds....regardless, let's hope that isn't mentioned!! My bleeding may miraculously clear up if it is

We don't have a shower either, and this very morning I was hanging my head over the bath washing my hair. It bloody kills my back these days. When we buy, we definitely want a shower, at least a shower head. I'm getting too old for a jug of water and an aching neck!

It's so exciting that you are going to redo a house how you want it. Hopefully things will get moving soon and you can crack on.

I do empathise with the lack of shower facilities! Especially when you have visitors, it's so much easier and quicker. Luxurious bubble baths are all very well when you have an evening free but they are not ideal for first thing in the morning!

Yup, we will be able to do what we want with it (money allowing but it will come together eventually) and it will be lovely. As there is not one part of the house which doesn't need ripping out (it has balding swirly carpets, lime green peeling wallpaper, hardboard covered doors and bannisters and so on) we feel more inclined to get stuck in and do as much as we possibly can. Have been putting together pics of stuff we like the look of (need to keep it reasonably simple for most of the house to make it appear bigger) and DH is very practical (if a little slow) so we'll get there.

I don't want to think about dildocams. It has made me feel rather faint!

It's amazing what a few months on MN can allow you to pick up!

The new house being in such an outdated state means you can just wade in with the skip and chuck the lot out, and redo everything how you want it. Perfect! And you obviously have an eye for it, going by your current place. The next six months look like they are going to be busy!