Feisty & Fabulous at 40+ more adventures of TTC

[gonepearshaped]

Actually now I feel guilty using up the last post of the thread - hope this will do as a continuation

I have a great image of this slippery parcel being passed over the counter - lol

ps. I've noticed something really nice. I've used all the smiley faces - except the envy. Everyone I've encountered on this thread and others on this site has been so nice, I've never felt jealous at all - ahhh how sloppy!!!

Ok ladies, how about this symptom (too embarassed to start my own thread!)? TMI alert!!!

Since I came off the pill three months ago, on each day 15 I start to get weird sensations down below - well sort of inside, really. I can feel a tenderness all day for a couple of days, and at its worst, if I bang down into a chair, I actually flinch! The first time I just thought we'd been at it too much , but this it the third time the day 15 ouch has hit!

I think technically I'm supposed to ovulate around day 17 (31ish day cycle) so is it leading up to that? Took OPK yesterday (day 14) and today (day 15) and nada. Last month, day 17 = nada!

Do you think I should be worried? Or am I just plain strange ?

[ashamed of embarrassing mumsnetters emoticon]

Hi all hope those that have been feeling grotty are all feeling much better.

Having had 6 months of regular visits from AF, I had a 38 day cycle and then early this morning another visit this time on CD19. I guess this actually just brings me back on the normal track that fondly believed I was on. Heaven knows what's going on.

Anyway I rang the clinic to try yet again to get the Hycosy booked only to be told that the two women that do the bookings were away and to ring tomorrow. Pointed out that I have a 9.20 appointment at the clinic tomorrow and that I could arrange it then, but was told that if I didn't ring at 8am I didn't stand much chance of getting one of the few hycosy slots. So no doubt my finger will be jabbing the redial button with a vengeance in the morning as all the others in the same boat all attempt to get one of the few precious slots.

Hippy my cousin's wife told me I was mental to be having a child at 44 but from what I can make out I've had a far easier time of it than she had (her DDs were born in her 20s). I'm nowhere near as neurotic and I certainly don't see my DD as hindering my career - which is the effect she felt her own DDs had on hers. I don't know whether it is just because DD is still a toddler or people think I'm younger than I am but I'm constantly getting asked when I'm going to have another one. So it's a case of telling them that I'm not able to but secretly crossing my fingers that it's not true. Is anyone else getting asked a lot about having more DCs? And what is your response?

pat42- 42 - TTC #2, CD17
10krunner - 43 - TTC #4 CD26
earoma - 38 TTC #3 CD 19
Rockdoctor - 43 TTC#2 CD28
Fruitbowl - 41 TTC#2 CD 26
vonsudenfed - 43 TTC#2 CD 20?? lost track
TheFatLadyScreams - 40 TTC#1 CD19
mabh - 42 TTC#1 CD12
Rowingboat - 43 TTC#2 CD 8
Spiralqueen - 46 TTC#2 CD1
Kiwikat - 43 TTC#2 CD13
gonepearshaped 41, ttc #2, CD4
Fifitot - 45 TTC#2 CD? Lost track this month!
Hippychick - 43 TTC#3 CD7
Ghenghis - 46 TTC#2 CD1 (humph)
Luckywebby - 40 TTC#3 CD16 (Ithink)
Angifi - 42 TTC#6 cd???
Woodelf - 46 TTC#2 CD 28???
Bluebell6 - 42 TTC 2 CD7

Graduates:
Haraslou
Grownupbabes
Tetleytea

pat42- 42 - TTC #2, CD17
10krunner - 43 - TTC #4 CD26
earoma - 38 TTC #3 CD 19
Rockdoctor - 43 TTC#2 CD28
Fruitbowl - 41 TTC#2 CD 26
vonsudenfed - 43 TTC#2 CD 20?? lost track
TheFatLadyScreams - 40 TTC#1 CD19
mabh - 42 TTC#1 CD15
Rowingboat - 43 TTC#2 CD 8
Spiralqueen - 46 TTC#2 CD1
Kiwikat - 43 TTC#2 CD13
gonepearshaped 41, ttc #2, CD4
Fifitot - 45 TTC#2 CD? Lost track this month!
Hippychick - 43 TTC#3 CD7
Ghenghis - 46 TTC#2 CD1 (humph)
Luckywebby - 40 TTC#3 CD16 (Ithink)
Angifi - 42 TTC#6 cd???
Woodelf - 46 TTC#2 CD 28???
Bluebell6 - 42 TTC 2 CD7

Graduates:
Haraslou
Grownupbabes
Tetleytea

spiral 07:57 sounds like a good time to me. Get jabbing!

I daren't think what some of my rellies will say if/when I get up to duff. Mum: delight (='guarantees' she will see us more often); brother: great! (he did it at 43); MiL:prodding, boasting down pub, then completely forgetting its due date/name/sex; FiL: astonishment; SMiL: I'm embarassing her!; SiL: you're weird, you. Best Friend: Tears, wailing, then 110% support ( can't have kids).

mabh don't be embarrassed about ANYTHING. If I've learnt anything from being on this thread for a while it's that we all get where your coming from and totally understand the need to tell all the gory details!!

I get pains in the top of my legs the day before I ovulate and it does kind of extend in to my bits and pieces. Sometimes I feel quite tender down there - not good for the old BDing!! I just put it down to my endometriosis ( i get odd pains in odd places at odd times and I put them all down to that). You could mention to your GP (if he/she is nice!)

Started peeing on a stick today but no surge yet - I don't really need the flippin' things anyway - I should just go by all my odd pains Can't wait for the xmas smileys!!!

Thanks hippy . This month I'd convinced myself it was ovulation-related, which is why I was a bit surprised when the OPK said no. Maybe it'll say yes tomorrow. In the meanwhile, as you say, I wouldn't be feeling like BDing if it wasn't for the fact this might mean that this is the right time (...opk aside ).

Okay, I will freely admit to being a geek. Mabh, I took this off wikipedia after I googled mittelschmerz.

"Mittelschmerz is characterized by lower abdominal and pelvic pain that occurs roughly midway through a woman's menstrual cycle. The pain can appear suddenly and usually subsides within hours, although it may sometimes last two or three days.[1] In some women, the mittelschmerz is localized enough so that they can tell which of their two ovaries provided the egg in a given month. Because ovulation occurs on a random ovary each cycle, the pain may switch sides or stay on the same side from one cycle to another.

Diagnosis of mittelschmerz is generally made if a woman is mid-cycle and a pelvic examination shows no abnormalities. If the pain is prolonged and/or severe, other diagnostic procedures such as an abdominal ultrasound may be performed to rule out other causes of abdominal pain.

The pain of mittelschmerz is sometimes mistaken for appendicitis and is one of the differential diagnoses for appendicitis in women of child-bearing age."

Oh, and I forgot to say, am 40, have 3 DSs and think am on CD8 today.

Hey Spiral, I'm in a similar position to you with rellies definately assuming I won't be having another one, but other mums etc assuming I'm still young enough without knowing my real age -although I've never kept it secret! I actually used to say no way to another when asked - and I believed that to be entirely right until last month when I had this really wierd feeling that maybe I was meant to have another one - don't ask me where that came from; it was as big a shock to me as anyone. Rellies will have a hairy fit as it means 2 to spoil....

Mabh - you're amongst friend and never need to apologise for asking sensible questions!

Ilovegregory woodelf thanks . And I love geeks! I had wondered about mittel-wotsit, but I had imagined that would be a stabby, one-sided thing whereas this is more general. I'll see if the OPK comes up with anything tomorrow.

Or I could be just weird .

Oh Hippy I hope my parcel dosen't leak! Urgh! Fifi I'm a bit embarressed by some of the stuff I've been buying on ebay from Babymad etc isn't it funny even in the virtual world and at my age worrying about what others think of me.
So Mabh don't worry about sharing your secrets - I should think we've all had to discuss some rather personal stuff with those we hardly know in pursuit of another DC. I haven't had your tender experience but I do sometimes get a jab in the ovary area around OV. Have you mentioned it to a DR?

Really Good Luck tomorrow Spiral
I had my 1st appointment at the fertility clinic today and it went well I think. Re embarressement having just met the consultant I was semi naked with a probe inside me I'm still smarting from the experience! They are doing bloods to check on all the clotting type factors. He could see some eggs which is amazing and unfortunately a polyp which I will have to have removed Ouch. They were all really nice though, of course there was lots of mention of my age but he seemed to think it was still potentially viable until 48.

Ghengis are you OK for Wednesday? We could have a naughty coffee.

Hi everyone,
Not a lot of news here, have managed to change acupuncture appt to fit in with random cycle (I think he is starting to take this on as a challenge to his abilities!) awaiting pre seed order and ready to hit the OPK on Friday!
I'm always being asked - particular favourite is 'Don't you want another' - there is a big difference between 'want' and 'can have' IMO!!
Have updated with my stats,
pat42- 42 - TTC #2, CD17
10krunner - 43 - TTC #4 CD26
earoma - 38 TTC #3 CD 19
Rockdoctor - 43 TTC#2 CD28
Fruitbowl - 41 TTC#2 CD 26
vonsudenfed - 43 TTC#2 CD 20?? lost track
TheFatLadyScreams - 40 TTC#1 CD19
mabh - 42 TTC#1 CD15
Rowingboat - 43 TTC#2 CD 8
Spiralqueen - 46 TTC#2 CD1
Kiwikat - 43 TTC#2 CD13
gonepearshaped 41, ttc #2, CD4
Fifitot - 45 TTC#2 CD? Lost track this month!
Hippychick - 43 TTC#3 CD7
Ghenghis - 46 TTC#2 CD6
Luckywebby - 40 TTC#3 CD16 (Ithink)
Angifi - 42 TTC#6 cd???
Woodelf - 46 TTC#2 CD 28???
Bluebell6 - 42 TTC 2 CD7

Graduates:
Haraslou
Grownupbabes
Tetleytea

Summer can't do Weds - last before half term toddler group from hell (I'm chair, this week half the people who are meant to be helpers won't be there aargh) then DS @ short preschool session. Could do Fri post acup - will be out by half ten I should think? Let me know

Hi everyone!
Mabh, I get that "mittel-thingy" and before I started acupuncture it was quite uncomfortable, but I liked having an idea of when I was ovulating, I could tell it was Ov because of the stretchy wet cervical mucus. Now that i'm older i don't get as much cm.Since having acupuncture the pain has lessened, as it did with AF too.

I don't remember grownupbabes getting a bfp.Did I miss something?When is she due?

I have a babyshower to go to this weekend. Two of my work collegues are expecting babies, lucky ducks!

Ddilemma - when is your Mia Spell time up? I have penciled it into my calendar so I can email her if I don't get my bfp by then!!!I am sure it is all really just a chance thing, but I still like to think it might help put the odds in my favour.

I have to skip acupuncture today, my dh has a work meeting, so noone to mind DS.Oh well, next week maybe.

Angi I had completely forgotten to check - nice one! Will burrow through emails to find the date

'morning folks - well the 'ouch' has let up. Not as bad as last month and that was better than the month before.

I was fitting a new washing machine at the weekend (stay with me ) and having a hell of a job tightening and untightening pipes so they let water through when they should/shouldn't. I am now having visions of my hormone valves half-seized up and creaking, getting a bit freeer each month!

But if that was mittel-doo-dah, why did I have a negative OPK yesterday and the day before ? I'll do another today, but.. .

Do they always work, then, these OPKs? Is it possible to do them wrong?

Just back from the clinic. As Mabh suggested was jabbing the redial at 7.57 although no one bothered to answer the phone until 9.05 (not engaged, just ringing out) so was almost at the clinic before I got through. However finally got a date for the hyscosy - 2nd Dec. As usual all the slots for this cycle had gone but at least I have a precious appointment for the next one assuming that my cycle doesn't let me down by being longer or shorter otherwise it's a case of being sent to the back of the queue again. No pressure there then

Anyway the consultant said there wasn't much to be done until the hycosy results are back but he does want DH to go and have another sperm test as he is concerned about the effect DH being off work with stress may be having. Although he told DH not to get stressed about it [duh emoticon].

Assuming that my tubes are ok and didn't get damaged during the emergency cs his recommendation at this stage is that we save up for IUI (about a grand) which would have a 10% chance of success which is about the same as our chance of conceiving naturally. IUI was new to me but apparently is where they concentrate your DHs sperm and then baste you with it.

He said that IVF would be futile at my age so that isn't an option. He was very nice though and understanding. He said that even if we are unable to have another baby that the important thing was to have tried the available options so that would enable us to move on successfully. His parting comment was "It's not all doom and gloom".

So we go on and see what happens. DH wants to sell his beloved beach buggy which would fund a couple of goes at IUI. It's really weird but a part of me almost wishes that they'd said it wouldn't be possible so that all this uncertainty would be over (but am slapping that part of me and chastising it for being so negative).

Mabh if it wasn't for being able to talk about the most embarrassing stuff on here and have lovely people answer our questions without making us feel completely stupid, we'd have to be asking the same stuff of people in RL or even more probably just keeping it to ourselves out of fear of looking stupid and could be worrying for no good reason. No question is too stupid/bizarre/intimate and has probably been asked before so fire away.

Well at least there's a date in diary, spiral. at them not answering the phone after what they said to you! FGS

IVI sounds interesting. I hadn't heard of that either. I know what you mean about half wondering if it would be a good idea to be told it wasn't to be - it would stop the faffing about. But then we just don't know what could happen, do we ?

In a way I wish I wasn't thinking about ovulation days and all that, as for the first time it's starting to make me think, 'well there's no point in BDing as it won't get anywhere'. Unfortunately I can't un-know it now, can I? The whole thing was more exciting when a couple of weeks seemed like contenders!

Hi everyone, I always lurk on this thread and I really love reading it, so I'm actually going to be brave and join officially. I'm 43 TTC with my new husband, I already have DCs but this would be his first.

Updated for Tuesday, with my stats added, I hope no one minds, I've rearranged it a bit into CD order [ocd emoticon] :

Rockdoctor - 43 TTC#2 CD29
Woodelf - 46 TTC#2 CD 29???
10krunner - 43 TTC#4 CD27
Fruitbowl - 41 TTC#2 CD 27
vonsudenfed - 43 TTC#2 CD 21?? lost track
earoma - 38 TTC#3 CD 20
TheFatLadyScreams - 40 TTC#1 CD20
modernart - 43 TTC#6 CD20
pat42- 42 - TTC#2, CD18
Luckywebby - 40 TTC#3 CD17 (Ithink)
mabh - 42 TTC#1 CD16
Kiwikat - 43 TTC#2 CD14
Rowingboat - 43 TTC#2 CD 9
Bluebell6 - 42 TTC#2 CD8
Hippychick - 43 TTC#3 CD8
Ghenghis - 46 TTC#2 CD7
gonepearshaped - 41 TTC#2, CD5
Spiralqueen - 46 TTC#2 CD2
Fifitot - 45 TTC#2 CD? Lost track this month!
Angifi - 42 TTC#6 cd???

Graduates:
Haraslou
Grownupbabes
Tetleytea

Hello modern, nice to meet you! And I love geeks, ocd-ers and all the rest of the great gang of well-intentioned pedants - I'm one, too! I had resisted the urge to re-order the list, but I had noticed and I'm glad you have . However I notice that you are ahead of me in the cycle list so I may have to mark you down for that .

I think I have got to the bottom of my ovulation conundrum - the sticks are out of date I only noticed this afternoon when I took my third test, thinking surely this must be it after all the mittel-wotsit analysis - dated 31.05.09! Bah. So hopefully the endless shagging (sorry, still a bit peed off) has been at the right time, anyway.

Which just raises another question to you far more experienced ladies! If I ovulate on day 15, and normally have AF on day 31, is a 16 day luteal (correct word?) phase a bit weird?

Hey all,

Mabh 16 days luteal phase is in the normal range - though what the dickens normal really means who knows
As far as I know it a too short lp that's considered to be a problem, less than 10 days is not so great cause then there's not enough time for a fertilised egg to implant and hormones to build up before aunt flo turns up and spoils the show IYSWIM.

Also, length of lp is supposed to be pretty stable, if there is any major variation it will be in the pre-ov follicular phase not the lp phase. So that means you might ov late but then the lp phase will be shorter. Glad you worked out the problem with OPKs - definitely better if they're fresh!

In the spirit of gentle pedantry I've finally updated CD on the list and moved myself - I've been stuck on CD 3-5 for about two months now!

Rockdoctor - 43 TTC#2 CD29
Woodelf - 46 TTC#2 CD 29???
10krunner - 43 TTC#4 CD27
Fruitbowl - 41 TTC#2 CD 27
vonsudenfed - 43 TTC#2 CD 21?? lost track
earoma - 38 TTC#3 CD 20
TheFatLadyScreams - 40 TTC#1 CD20
modernart - 43 TTC#6 CD20
gonepearshaped - 41 TTC#2, CD18
pat42- 42 - TTC#2, CD18
Luckywebby - 40 TTC#3 CD17 (Ithink)
mabh - 42 TTC#1 CD16
Kiwikat - 43 TTC#2 CD14
Rowingboat - 43 TTC#2 CD 9
Bluebell6 - 42 TTC#2 CD8
Hippychick - 43 TTC#3 CD8
Ghenghis - 46 TTC#2 CD7
Spiralqueen - 46 TTC#2 CD2
Fifitot - 45 TTC#2 CD? Lost track this month!
Angifi - 42 TTC#6 cd???

Graduates:
Haraslou
Grownupbabes
Tetleytea

my sis conceived her DD with IUI. 5 years ago. Her hubbie had a low sperm count and she had probs too. It worked well for them. They make sure your egg is ready then they take the sample and clean it up (remove all the ones going round in circles etc) then they put it right up inside, so it's not knackered from swimming all the way.

It's defo less invasive than IVF and cheaper. She was 39 when they had it. So defo give it a go if you can spiral.

welcome modern - were all nice here. Love the whole OCD thing - very funny. Sorry to rain on your parade but I've been stuck on day 8 for ages - sorry to mess it up

Mahb 16 day LP is fine. It's the short ones that are a bother (like me!!!) . Still lots of people on this site have given me advise and I'm defo sorting that prob out.

It is possible to miss the surge with the sticks (lots of people miss the surge and then find out they're preg) so still GO FOR IT!

spiral what is a hyscosy???

Good luck to all. We managed a really quick BD this am whilst the DS's had breakfast - it was v. stressful and rushed (God the things we do cos it's day 13!!!)

at the rushed BD whilst DCs otherwise engaged! When I read this site, I do wonder how 2nd etc children are ever born!

I think I have to decide that the day 15 nether-region-clutching has to be ovulation. Given I've had it on the same day of all of the last three months (since I came off the pill), it must be that or a very strange coincidence. Ruddy sticks, though, they had me thinking all sorts of unfortunate things. I might give them a miss, even within their date code .

Poor hubbie, who is normally quite enthusiastic, is rather knackered at the moment - he works in sales and is flat out selling xmas stuff. Perhaps he can have the night off (but then again, it's still day 16...)

Hippy it's a procedure to see if your tubes are open and not damaged in any way. I gather they squirt fluid in as a test )somebody correct me if I'm wrong) and it takes about half an hour. They do it within 10 days of your period finishing and you can't BD from the start of your period until you've had the hycosy so basically that's another wasted cycle but hopefully in a good cause.