Just MC'd. Starting it all again.. Come and join me for the long haul, vol 2

[thefatladyscreams]

Hardly the most original title but I didn't want to loose anyone (well that's my excuse for the lack of originality!)

hmm didn't post brilliantly but you can figure it out!

i think totally that you have just picked a total ARSE of a test....superdrug own are 10ml/u i think....i hate FR so woudn't recommend that one and CBdigi are 25ml/u....

b you are very right, just found out that 'answer' are produced by the same company and FR but not for early detection so cheap as are from first day missed period only. hence low sensitivity.

Will get to superdrug tomorrow or maybe CB but not digital! Not Pregnant would be too much to bear

although might have AF by morning

right, will try and stop obsessing now

the thing is if you are anything like me...{and we both know you are..}even if you get a hint of a line on a normal CB you won't believe it and will therefore rush out to buy a digi to see it written plainly and uninterpretably.....io had 6 cheapies telling me i was PG yet really didn't believe it til i saw it on the digi.....save yourself the money ha ha.....

Wednesday's list:

Cheepz TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 5 CD32
LeeWT TTC#2 UCL 30-32 cycle -2 CD30
Barrenbrook TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 9 CD28
sarahlou8 TTC#3 UCL27 cycle 1 CD26
TFLS TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 6 CD24
Zayja TTC#1 UCL24-27 cycle 9 CD24
Tigerbear TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 5 CD24
Tigger15 TTC#2 UCL31 cycle 7 CD20
MrsRigby TTC#2 UCL? cycle 1 CD18
Louisesh TTC#1 UCL33 cycle 25 CD15
vivcliquot TTC#1 UCL27 cycle 2 CD12
RunForTheHills TTC#1 UCL30 cycle 13 CD11
sunburntats TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 1 CD9
Hopefully TTC#2 UCL 27 cycle 2 CD5
Tetleytea TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 2 CD4
effilump TTC#5 UCL28 cycle 1 CD2
samanthab123 TTC#3 UCL28 cycle 2 CD1
PoppyisaPain TTC#2 UCL 28 cycle 1 CD?
hopefully TTC? UCL? cycle WTF CD?
keevamum TTC#3 UCL? cycle? CD?
lulabell79 TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?

WTTC
Justbeenforapromenade
Fingerscrossedlegsopen

MIA (stopped at CD60)
em22 TTC#? UCL28 cycle 3 CD61
trixel TTC#3 UCL28-35 cycle 7 CD61

GRADUATES
amyboo
totally
Hoops997
Stressy BFP 22nd August 2009
becky78 BFP 4th September 2009
LittleOneMum BFP 7th September 2009
Waitingisntfun BFP 19th September 2009
Chamois BFP 7th October 2009
Apples BFP 9th November 2009 - TWINS
Meita BFP 10th December 2009
CakeandFineWine BFP 27th December 2009
boodleboot BFP 2nd January 2010
Jollster BFP 10th January 2010

samanthab123 I'm sorry.

I just want to apologise again cheepz, I read THAT post a couple of times and it does come across quite nasty. I'm truly sorry I didn't mean it like that.

mrsr really, don't worry, I am sure I was driving everyone nuts - I was driving myself nuts, and I know you didn't mean it to be mean.

I really like your posts and the fact you are so open about everything and having 'known' you here for a while (and seen you in action when lurking on one or two other threads!) its clear you just speak your mind and I respect that. But I know alot of the time you have your tongue in cheek. I was just feeling abit oversensitive this afternoon.

This thread is great - we have our own little community, but we are all dealing with some pretty hard stuff so as B said earlier its amazing how little tension there is, its hard to be happy when someone else has just got exactly what you wanted and you have just found out you are losing yours or have not made it this month but we all manage to keep each other going and be happy for each other even when we are green with envy and thinking 'why not me'. I haven't found that in any other onlinne forum or even on any other threads so lets keep it like that.

not obsessing or anything but looks like I am going to get to CD33 as no AF, no sign of spotting, no cramps but odd twinges, boobs tingling and I am sure have grown this evening and no I really do think I am pregnant!

what a loser

Well, I believe that damned witch is on her way. WWWHHHHHYYYY? Was thinking we had finally done it again, but then after a terrible morning at work, went to the loo to see what I've been hoping I wouldn't. Cried in my office, trudged through the rest of a shitty LOOONG day then cried all the way home. Feb. will make it a full year since I got pregnant
DH is out of town, so feeling lonely and sad, at least he's been a dear via text... and my cats are being extra snuggly.
Sorry to whine whine whine but I just have to unload some emotional baggage.
Sorry she got u too samb - it sucks!
Not quite CD1 yet, so will move myself when she hits full force. Thanks ladies for letting me vent.

ah zayja....not you too...so sorry.

cheepz get yourself a proper test.....

sorry zayja, arse to that... totally understand the whine, does that mean you'll now have some wine?

cheepz, know exactly what you mean; last week every night I'd update a little sticky note on my desktop with how many days I'd made it to with no AF.... So here's hoping that's all it takes to guarantee a BFP .

hope everyone ok

had some strange bubbling and twinges yesterday; convinced every time I went to the loo there'd be spotting. I may have experienced this when pregnant before, but didn't have the cloak of paranoia so firmly wrapped round me before...

Deep breath

can I join you ladies?

I'm 44 trying for my second (DS 4). We ad our first mc this time last year at 5 weeks. Fell again in August then mmc in Sept. I've been lurking but worried that if I join in I'll obsess more.

But I think I really do need somewhere to talk about all of this because (given my age) I se this as finite. If I get pregnant again and mc I'll have to stop trying, and if I don't fall in awhile I'll have to stop trying.

So I have a mix of PMA and trying to resign myself to the results of the choices I have made in life (waiting for the right DH)

you seem like a really lovely bunch and wishing you all the best

I am

SarahMumtoAlex ttc no 2, UCL 28 Cycle 4, CD 20

Morning lovelies

Sorry to cheepz and sam and zayja - what a fucking nightmare.

although i still think there is hope for cheepz

(Cheepz - I swear by the Clearblue Non-Digi tests, if that helps.)

As for me, D13 and till no smiley face on the digi ovu thingy. Have now convinced myself I'm not ovulating. Well, either that or I'm a day later in my cycle than I think I am (you may remember I asked at the start of the month whether I should count D1 as first sign of a bleed or the first full-on bleed...)

Still, smiley face or no smiley face, DH and I have pencilled in some 'quality time' together tonight, tomorrow and Saturday. I bloody love that man.

Hello sarahmumtoalex

Sorry that you've had to find yourself here but welcome all the same. It's not that much of a madhouse. Honest. xx

Sorry Cheepz and Zayja - this is shit isn't it?
I even dreamt about periods last night, probably because I spent about an hour on the MN ovulation calculator and on the one I have on the period tracker, trying to work out if we really had sex at the right time this month. AF due from today. Pah!
Welcome Sarah!
Hugs to all.

Hi, and welcome to SarahMumtoAlex! Will do list in a moment and add you.

Drove to my dad's yesterday, 6 hours with the amazing car-hating baby. What joy. But he did at least sleep a little bit last night, so am not too dead.

Can someone explain the CB fertility thingies to me? Am faintly tempted to try them as the last couple of months I feel like I've had AF too soon after OV, so might be interesting to keep some kind of eye on it so I can go to doc if it looks like I've got some prob with my luteal phase (is that the 2ww bit? I can never remember).

Sorry for your BFN Cheepz, keeping fingers crossed for testing again, but can well imagine how difficult it is to keep the raging emotions/imagination in check.

Am somewhat relieved to already be on day 6 since bleeding started (although who knows what my cycle will do this month). Don't feel like it's been that long. If I do OV at normal time then it means I'm only a week and a bit away from it.

Gave over - fat lady singing - although very wierd as just got up in night and lets just say was good job I had a liner in - normally AF is spotting for 24 hours then flow, but maybe just because its late, its heavy - although by calculations still not that late - CD32 this cycle would be CD31 any other and since my cycles seem to go one long one short that is in keeping - monitor is good like that.

However and about to do way tmi here heavy clots and bleeding is much more like when had mc than af so it maybe that I was pgh and it was implantation bleed ast week - will know as if AF as normal will subside from heavy bleeding in 2 days whereas mc lasted much longer. Probably AF later than normal so AF heavier than normal.

Either way I am at least parachuting to the bottom thanks to testing yesterday as otherwise might be falling like a rock with disappointment this morning - so thanks for the peer pressure its made it much easier today.

Am trying to see upside - that being that if I had been pg then would be totally freaking out about how unhealthy I was over Christmas and the impact that might have! And at least have not had to wait too long after BFN to get AF and start again - new year, new start. On to cycle 6!

SarahMTA sorry to find you here but welcome all the same, know what you mean about worrying about obsessing but have found this is a great outlet.

zayja big hugs lovely.

leewt any news? and hows your nan.

barrenb you there?

sarahlou8 ?

Oh - have deleted MIA as its been ages

Thursday's list:

LeeWT TTC#2 UCL 30-32 cycle -2 CD31
Barrenbrook TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 9 CD30
sarahlou8 TTC#3 UCL27 cycle 1 CD27
TFLS TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 6 CD25
Zayja TTC#1 UCL24-27 cycle 9 CD25
Tigerbear TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 5 CD25
Tigger15 TTC#2 UCL31 cycle 7 CD21
SarahMumtoAlex ttc no 2, UCL 28 Cycle 4, CD 20
MrsRigby TTC#2 UCL? cycle 1 CD19
Louisesh TTC#1 UCL33 cycle 25 CD16
vivcliquot TTC#1 UCL27 cycle 2 CD13
RunForTheHills TTC#1 UCL30 cycle 13 CD12
sunburntats TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 1 CD10
Hopefully TTC#2 UCL 27 cycle 2 CD6
Tetleytea TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 2 CD5
effilump TTC#5 UCL28 cycle 1 CD3
samanthab123 TTC#3 UCL28 cycle 2 CD2
Cheepz TTC#2 UCL28 cycle 6 CD1
PoppyisaPain TTC#2 UCL 28 cycle 1 CD?
hopefully TTC? UCL? cycle WTF CD?
keevamum TTC#3 UCL? cycle? CD?
lulabell79 TTC#? UCL? cycle? CD?

WTTC
Justbeenforapromenade
Fingerscrossedlegsopen

GRADUATES
amyboo
totally
Hoops997
Stressy BFP 22nd August 2009
becky78 BFP 4th September 2009
LittleOneMum BFP 7th September 2009
Waitingisntfun BFP 19th September 2009
Chamois BFP 7th October 2009
Apples BFP 9th November 2009 - TWINS
Meita BFP 10th December 2009
CakeandFineWine BFP 27th December 2009
boodleboot BFP 2nd January 2010
Jollster BFP 10th January 2010

welcome sarah.. totally know where you're coming from. Swing wildly from desperately wanting a sibling for DS (maybe 2... who AM I kidding..), to thinking I must cherish him and if it's just him, then that's like a lottery win anyway (except at 3am some mornings recently...). Good luck, you're in a good place here.

cheepz, sorry x

hopefully, 6 hours ...? You're a much braver woman than me!

hi to everyone else.

Hello everyone, sorry to cheepz. Why is it that chain smoking, lambrini drinking, benefit grabbing wastes of space can fall pregnant at the drop of a hat, over and over again, and have their babies no problem, but for others its so hard! Life's so unfair at times. I was on the bus a few weeks ago, when a bunch of young mums got on, one of them commented that the other ones baby had got really big, I know she replied, he's a right little shit! How nice!

thats awful

My DS crawled into bed this morning with me and DH and said 'Mummy, am cold, can I come and cuddle in your house' - 'my house' to him is the gap between my thighs, tummy and chin when curled up in bed, he squeezes himself in and then says 'i love it in your house mummy' - darling boy

That is so sweet.

Effilump - That's reminded me of when I was in hospital having a D&C after my mmc, and they kept me in overnight as I came out of surgery with a raging temperature.

The next morning, I was waiting to be discharged when a girl of 16 was admitted onto the ward as she was having a miscarriage. She was a right mouthy so and so, shouting at the nurses left, right and centre - screaming and swearing at them when they tried to give her pain relief, saying how she couldn't swallow tablets, but then refused to have an injection because she was terrified of needles.

At first I felt sorry for her as she was clearly young and terrified of what was happening to her, but her behaviour was so utterly obnoxious that it really got to me. There were four other women (including me) on the ward who all were going through exactly the same thing, and yet we had to sit there and listen to her screech and eff and jeff at anyone who dared look at her.

I would have said something, were it not for the fact that I thought she, or her nan (who was with her at the time) might lamp me.

Jollster it was seriously not fun, and I suspect the drive back on Mon will be worse . But I now feel fully justified in never coming again because it's too far (as I told him it would be when he first mentioned moving her. Daft man. He got all upset because I'm prepared to drive to my mother, who lives 2 hours away).

I had DS in bed with me for an hour this morning in an attempt to get more sleep (with mixed results. He slept, I didn't, because he kept wriggling to the edge), it's so nice having a cuddle sometimes! Could never have coped with co-sleeping, but it's nice sharing a bed occasionally.

Cheepz sorry to hear the bad news, how rubbish for you . Guess you're right about having the partial warning of BFN though.

Viv she sounds like a real charmer!

for all the dashed hope and disappointment going on here.

In a way I suppose I can count myself lucky to have missed out on all that (the hope and disappointment cycle). Since my MC, first the WTF cycle confused me and we missed the "window", so never got hopes up. Then the next two cycles were very probably anovulatory, so although we BD'ed every other or third day, from start to end, I never got to the position of wondering - am I, aren't I? expect wrt ovulating. Having exhausted ourselves a bit with all that pointless (in hindsight) BDing, we had much less sex - about once in five days - and promtly I ovulated, and although FF rated our chances as low, well, here we are. Maybe there is something to the theory that being relaxed makes for better chances?

Thinking of all of you, and hoping that next time the hope will manifest itself into a bean.

viv yes I think 2-7pm is probably the right window for OPKs. Though CB OPKs say it doesn't matter at what time of the day you do them. I suppose if your LH surge is strong and long, it really doesn't matter, but if it is weaker and shorter, you might miss it if you test at the wrong time of the day. I had cheepie e-bay OPKs, 50 of them for £12 plus 15 free HPTs, so for a while I did two per day. But it was pointless because the cycles I used them on both turned out to be anovulatory. Stopped using them, and ovulated. So can't say if they would have shown positive or at what time of the day.
Hope you get a smiley soon.

I am definitely having another mc, tmi warning volume, consistency, colour, texture and number of clots are all exactly like last time and way more than normal, am getting through pads at a rate and don't dare use tampos

gutted as i am, am relieved i managed to get pregnant again as was beginning to wonder if I could, but still - heartbreak city

will go to doctor to confirm and discuss what implications are ...

love to all - thanks for being here - don't know how i would cope without you

Oh cheepz - so sorry for you my sweetie. Big hugs to you xxx

And sorry zayja and SamB as well.

Things seem a bit of a bummer at the moment...

Was reading this at work on Monday but couldn't post. Then fell ill and been in bed for a couple of days, desperately wondering if boodle was having twins! Didn't feel I could ask DH to log on for me to check! Boodle - did you get an answer??

Welcome hopefully and sarahmumtoalex. Sorry you've gone/going through this but good to have you on board.

Sarahmumtoalex - I know that you mean about the choices and age thing. I'm 41 and ttc no 1.

Anyway, fed up of daytime TV, will scream if I watch another post your gold advert and good to be back here.

Meita - isn't your midwife appointment happening around now?