Just MC'd. Starting it all again.. Come and join me for the long haul, vol 2

[thefatladyscreams]

Hardly the most original title but I didn't want to loose anyone (well that's my excuse for the lack of originality!)

Failing miserably to get any work done today - if anyone has a spare kick up the butt around, can you please send it in my direction!

Welcome back apples - wow moving to France is a pretty impressive reason for not posting for a while! Hope you're settling in well and glad you're back on line.

Hiya jollster. I got pregnant fairly easily the first time despite being 40 but didn't realise how lucky I was. Naively I thought that getting pregnant again after m/c would be simple - all my anxiety focussed on holding on to the pregnancy. Now I know better

boodle - apologies if I've mentioned it before but fertilityfriend.com is a good free site for recording your temps.

Cheepz lol at BIO! Wish I had a fast forward button I could press for you. But sorry, I'm afraid you're going to have to sit out the dreaded 2WW. It's not fair, is it!

Well AF has arrived not as gutted as i thought i might be,i feel relieved the wait is over. Wasn't to be and can now look forward to trying again this month.My emotions are quite high at the moment,but going to focus on becoming a aunt for the first time very shortly.My sister is going to be a first time mum and going to need all the help she can get

Going to try and not get to obsessed about TTC this month,but that is easy to say on day1

Well first step done!!!!! Put our names down for adoption enquiries....Won t be able to start the process until March as have to wait 6 months after my MC.But at last feel like we re getting somewhere and March isn t that long off.Get xmas out of the way and we can start.

Hope everyones ok....We ll keep trying ttc back to it this week now on CD6 might even have BD for fun later!!! Woo hoo vaguely remember that feeling!!!! Had today off work after a busy weekend nice lazy day off to fat club now for weekly weigh in Yeh can t wait!!!!

Evening ladies!

Louisesh - well done on putting your names down, its a big psychological step. Do let me know if there's anything I can help you with as you go through the process. I know only too well how tough it is - but so worth it.

Bigmuther - sorry to hear AF is here but how exciting to be an auntie soon! Hopefully the new baby will take your mind of TTC for a while and it will happen while you're not even thinking about it...

TFLS - no kicks here, take it easy! It's so hard to get any work done when all you can think about is TTC.

apples - France! how fab is that! lol at Dh and the fluids!

Cheepz - fingers crossed for a BIO for you! Hate the 2ww.

Boodle - just to say thinking of you, glad you feel you are healing x

and Hi to everyone else, I'm here but access to internet very limited at the moment plus real life rather more eventful than I'd wish for. Have had a scan which shows a little BIO with a good heartbeat, everything looks good so just hanging on now for 12 week scan when I might start to believe this is really happening. Thank you all for the positive thoughts x

chamo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx hang in there chamo-bean - so glad that things are going ok. steady eddie is good. thanks for keeping us posted.

Great news chamois - roll on 12 weeks! Love the chamo-bean name!

How's the sympton spotting today cheepz?

Good news re registering louisesh. Hope the weigh in went well. I've just put on 5 lbs so trying to get back on the straight and narrow!

bigmuther here's hoping this is your month. When is your sister due?

Still need that kick up the proverbial. Will get off Mumsnet now and try to do some work!

Hi Ladies

I've just done a great big long post to introduce myself and explain my situation that took me about half an hour (Lots of thinking not just typing !) and the laptop froze and lost it

I don't have the energy to do it all again so here it is in a series of bullet points...

• Just read many of your stories and mine seems insignificant by comparison
• I would like to join you if I qualify
• Just got home from a two day stay in hospital with a 'suspected mc'
• Conceived using IUI so very sure of dates. Was 6 weeks on saturday, but scan on Monday dates at 4 weeks, so imo baby died 2 weeks ago.
• Brown discharge started on Sunday, bleeding/clots/bad cramping started yesterday. *Drs won't confirm it until follow up HCG (tomorrow) and scan (next week) but I don't see the point. *I'm 40 with a 1yr old son, also conceived using IUI. I'm desperate for another baby, not for me but for a sibling for DS1.
• Current over riding feeling is one of failing DS and letting him down
• Don't know what to think - was this my last chance ? Looking forward should I feel encouraged that I got pregnant or is it a set back because MC ? How does this effect my future chances ? How soon can we try again.....

Any thoughts or advice would be welcome - I feel totally at sea...

PS Sorry for the ramble and sorry of TMI but have so much spinning round in my head that I needed to get it out

Oh beauflies I am so, so sorry my sweetie. I had just added my congrats belatedly on the over 40s thread.

I don't know what to say. Just take a deep breath and take it one day at a time at the moment. You must feel so mixed up - let it work it through and I'm sure you've got every chance of conceiving again.

I had a m/c earlier this year at 40. My acupuncturist saw it as a good sign that I had got pregnant even if sadly it didn't last.

You haven't let anyone down, least of all your son.

I found there was some useful leaflets about trying again on the Micarriage Association website. You will also get loads of support from the lovely ladies on here where you will be very welcome.

There is loads written about when to TTC again. From what I've read there is no reason not to try immediately but I would listen to your body and do what is right for you. Allow yourself time to grieve and start to heal.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Take care of yourself.

Beaufies so sorry for you - but you are in the right place - we are a proper bunch of rambling, frustrated, sometimes sad, sometimes happy, imparters of TMI.

Seems like you are in a place we have all been, albeit in various different circumastances.

Sounds like mc like many of us have had, brown to red to clots to cramps, its normally heavy for a week or so.

I am, like you, keen to have another dc as I have a ds and I so want him to have a sibling and if I can't because I have left it too late (am 37) will be gutted that was so selfish about starting late

Just because you have had mc does not mean no more chances at all, some women have several, young women and older women, it can be for a million different reasons and you won't know why.

In terms of trying again right away - most of us did that! Not sure if it is any different with IUI could be ..... worht asking the doctor maybe, although someone here might know!

Anyway - welcome x

Hi all - can I join you? Going to need some help with the acronyms though.

Had 2nd MC since having my 2 year old, last month at about 6 weeks, am sure because of the pregnancy symptoms and the "tissue", though GPs reaction pretty much nothing to worry about.
Really, really want a second child before my toddler is too old (I ideally wanted a 2-3 year gap). But how soon is too soon to try again?
Also blogged on this www.bitmorecomplicated.com/?p=94

gaaah - i am disgusted with myself

gave in and did an hpt - an expensive one even 'not pregnant' of course.

its cd24 so could be 3, 4 or even 5 days early but am still disappointed even though I could test again in a few days and it could be different result, am now busy convincing myself its all in my head

POAS purveyors should be locked up - its like selling broken dreams!!!

feel free to tell me what a gormless moneywasting idiot I am - but don't tell dh .....

ps welcome jojojoy and sorry for my outburst!

Hi all welcome to "newbies"...Had a crap day in tears at work convinced NEVER going to get pg and actually not miscarry after 2 years of ttc.

Got my appt at re-current MC clinic for blood results in Dec.....Might refer myself back to counselling as feeling crap about it all at present just want 1 child!!!!!

Last night at slimming world 1lb on!!!! Seems to be yo-yoing!!!! Still, in total i ve lost 12lbs which is what i have to focus on...Still at work long day today am absolutely drained after being in tears this am......

Stamping my feet ITS NOT FAIR!!!! Whinge,whinge,whinge.Sorry

CD28 and no period so thought i would be really really pathetic and test.....why i have no idea.....its so far fetched and even as i was buying the test {superdrug ultra early one - 2 for 4.99} i knew it would be negative as only BD once this month remotely near my ov time....obviously it was BFN.

seriously cheepz i feel your pain and feel pretty myself. luv ya girl

thank god i can come on here and fess up tho....DH would FREAK if i told him as i assured him CD17 was safe and i had ov'd on cd12 so the thought of me testing for pregnancy when he has specifically asked we wait til christmas to start trying again would NOT BE GOOOOOOOD.

welcome to beau and joy - hoping this is a lucky thread for you.

louisesh god love you girl, here I am wingeing and at least am blessed enough to have ds sitting next door watching postman pat. xxxxx and big hugs and thanks for a healthy dose of perspective.

God my post was so insensitive - apologies....sorry louise....sorry you are having such a crappy day hun...it IS really unfair that you have to be going through those feelings....i am amazed that you are strong any day after TTC for that length of time, you would put me to total shame...

really hoping you feel a bit better tomorr but if you don't then where better to rant than on here....lots of love to you

A big (((hug))) to louise. Hope you are feeling better today. You WILL have a child, I'm sure of it. Be it the home-grown variety, or by adoption... It's the end result that counts. Hey, you are totally entitled to feeling crap - no need to apologise!

Welcome to beaufies and jojo. Sorry to hear your sad stories. I hope you find as much consolation and hope on here as I have.

Well my AF has gone weird on me (spotting, then a day of nothing, then two days of normal AF, then nothing, then spotting again - my whole life so far it has just been regular 5 days normal AF and nothing else) - will just have to take what my body throws at me.

Yesterday I told my doctoral supervisor (I am a PhD student) about my MC (by e-mail). I know, it's not precisely "news" anymore... but I never got the courage up to talk to her. I had to tell her at some point because it did delay my research quite a lot (my research is based on the life stories that women tell who are undergoing IVF, and all through summer the topic was just waaaay too personal and I avoided doing any work on it). Now she wants to set up an appointment to meet and I'm dreading it. Why am I dreading it? I'm feeling quite well these days, not too unstable emotionally, it should be ok, shouldn't it?

Also yesterday a colleague /fellow PhD student told me his girlfriend is pg - 12 weeks in. He hasn't told anyone, just me...!?! Feeling ...

I'm sorry about this ego-posting, I've read everything but am short of time for replying to you all.

Thanks everyone for all your kind words much appreciated.

CHEEPZ,BOOBLEBOOT and MEITA you are all very understanding thanks xxx

Feel slightly better today worked out a coping mechanism of putting it all out of my mind to try and protect myself.On CD 8 soo Bd every other day at present

Hope everyone is ok and not feeling the cold too much.Will check in later when got more time but a big THANKS.....

Welcome jojojoy - sorry you're in the same boat but lovely to have you on board. I'm of the try as soon as you feel ready school. Just shout if you don't understand any of the acronyms - we make up quite a few as we go along!

beaufies - how are you doing? Did you get any answers today?

meita - my last AF was really weird as well. Spotting for several days beforehand which I read can be linked to low prosgesterone levels which had me off googling far more than was probably helpful! If this was a one-off from your normal pattern, maybe it is still your body trying to correct itself (well that's my theory on optimistic days!). Very understandable about your meeting with your supervisor. It's funny, I've told no-one in real life about my m/c apart from my acupuncturist. I am so comfortable talking about it/TTC again with her and you guys, yet the idea of even raising the subject with anyone new would be a complete no no. I guess it just makes it more "real" in some way. I don't know, sorry for the ramble but I'm a private person and I would have mixed feelings in advance of such a meeting but probably feel a whole way better afterwards. Didn't realise your research was in that area - sounds fascinating (albiet probably a bit close to the bone recently).

cheepz - we have all been there! And yes, it only adds salt to the wounds when you only have an expensive test to hand (awaiting that magic BFP) and it turns out to be negative. Sending you a bucket of patient vibes!

louisesh sorry you had such a crap day, stomp away. There does get to be times when it is just too much. Congrats on the 12 lbs - you're right, it is about the bigger picture but the odd pound or two only seems to be gained when we least need it.

boodle you're just too kind - I think you only tested so we didn't feel lonely! Or you are addicted to peeing on sticks! Make sure you empty the bins this week so DH doesn't discover the evidence!

Boo! barrenbrook waves I have resurfaced from the land of no t'interweb, it is not a good place to be in!

Sorry for my slackness, alas it is not through me being up the duff and waiting for some more time to pass, it is because, like apples, we moved house, (although not quite as glamorous as apples, just one town in Essex to another) into a proper grown up house with a garden and everything!

How is everyone? I have much catching up to do, but I skimmed through the posts and want to say yey for Chamo

Anyway, I am off to read through posts and catch up on everyone's news, t'is nice to be back

Hello to all the newbies

Hi again all
Told you my attendance would be sporadic (just like being back at uni!!)
Welcome beaufies & jojojoy the ladies here are very helpful and welcoming and acronym helpers too

cheepz I have a confession too, my name is cakeandfinewine and I am a POAS addict too there I've said it, I bought a twin pack the day AF arrived as I felt faint in supermarket ran upstairs when I got home only to be saying hello to AF instead keep thinking about cracking them open this week as AF was v.bizarre less than 24 hours in total?!?!? but know I'm not PG IYSWIM!?

Louisesh bug virtual {{{hugs}}} you will have children one way or another and I really can't imagine how I would feel if my MC was before I was blessed with my DD but I have a friend who did and she gave birth 2 her 2DC 4 weeks ago!! Also nice to have another slimming worlder on here! I walked out this week after being SO good this wk my scales said 4lb loss theres said 1 so I went home watched the frankly thin ladies on Gok and sulked!!!!!!

Fingers crossed for everyone, I'm not about til at least Friday as I'm off to London for a course tomorrow so will be a super long day! spk sn and keep them chins up xxxx

Hi Ladies

Just a quick update...

Had a long discussion with my Obs & Gyne Dr on the phone today who agreed with me that there was no real point to doing the HCG test as the scan info was pretty conclusive

I will be going back for a follow up scan two weeks today to "check for any retained products" (lovely term...) and to see if I need a D&C. I wish I could have one now and kind of get it all over with rather than have it dragging on for day after day after day......

I have been feeling a bit more positive about it today, if that doesn't sound too weird. I have had four cycles of IUI in total, one produced my DS and one this pregnancy. I'm telling myself that this one didn't make it due to quality control which needed to happen, but at least we know that IUI is very successful for us and we just need to keep going and hope that next time it's a good egg and a good sperm...as it was first time. Do you think I'm taking positive thinking too far and actually just fooling myself ?

We've decided to wait for the new year before we start again.

Thanks for all your kind words. It really is so hard, and helps to have support from people who really do understand.

Good luck everyone

PS Give me a couple of weeks to get through the worst of this and I promise my contributions will be less 'me, me, me'

Beaufies i know what you mean about feeling more positive but it is still a long rollercoaster ride and expect a lot of ups and downs.This is why i have found MN good for me because you can come on and ramble,and every one here knows how it feels.

thefatladyscreams My sister is due the 20th this month,if i had not MC we would of been due 3 days apart.Really pleased for her she had a lot of heartache to get were she is 2day MC 4 times.She had some tests and they found out she had a blood cloting condition so has to have injections every day.

AF still lurking so DH is having well earned rest,so should be willing and able when the time comes this month.My birthday 2day the big 35 omg

Thanks for all your kind words so far

AF here.....CD28.....i am so regular. even with the MC and the EP i am a regular 28 day cycle. Ov days 10-12 LP 16days....

good to know tho.

only one more period to go before i can try again tho....woohoo. I will aim to BD CD9 which gives me an outside chance of conceiving this month but not really going for it.....makes me think i am still playing the game with everyone when really i'm not allowed! ha.

The lady at work who had my due date of nov 6th still hasn't had her baby! i feel excited for her now and at all which is really lovely.

hope you are all having nice day. Not heard from MrsR for a bit....hope all our grads are ok....

barenbrook where are you in cycle? i know you said not pg so have moved you to lurk at bottom of list until we know where you are - feel free to revise!!

runfor news news anything?!

boodle - sorry about AF but probably for the ebst as your dh would have been fuming!!!!

as for me CD 26 and since my complete failure to display any control on CD24 I have remained disiplined. AF due tomorrow or over the weekend so if no AF by Monday I will test again. Still very mixed signals, I was almost sick yesterday morning, but then today nothing and if anything feel like I have abit of PMS. So we will see and the good thing about my POAS incident is that it has at least calmed me down abit and made me a bit more pragmatic about things.

Thursday's list:

RunForTheHills TTC#1 UCL 26-30 cycle 10 CD 37
Cheepz TTC#2 UCL 28 cycle 3 CD26
Tigerbear TTC#1 UCL28 cycle 1 CD18?
Apples TTC#3 UCL 28 cycle 2 CD17
CakeandFineWine TTC#2 UCL31 cycle 1 CD16?
Jollster TTC#2 Cycle 2 UCL 26-33?! CD16
TFLS TTC#1 UCL 28 cycle 4 CD16
Tigger15 TTC#2 UCL31 cycle 5 CD15
Zayja TTC#1 UCL 24-27 cycle 7 CD10
Louisesh TTC#1 UCL33 cycle 2 CD9
Meita TTC#1 UCL 30-45 cycle 3 CD8
boodleboot TTC#3 UCL28 cycle 2 CD1
Barrenbrook TTC#1 UCL 28 cycle 7 CD?

WTTC
LeeWT
Justbeenforapromenade

MIA (stopped at CD60)
em22 TTC#? UCL 28 cycle 3 CD60
trixel TTC#3 UCL 28-35 cycle 7 CD60

GRADUATES
amyboo
totally
Stressy BFP 22nd August
becky78 BFP 4th September
LittleOneMum BFP 7th September
VivCliquot BFP 10th September
Waitingisntfun BFP 19th September
Chamois BFP 7th October
MrsRigby BFP 11th October