The one where Emmsy's friends say, 'if you're names not down, you're not coming in!'

[HeyThereGeorgieGirl]

What do you think?

xx

Sparkly I'm sorry about that, how crap!! How are things today? When is your next scheduled scan?

It's totally crap. I'd be there everyday otherwise.
Things ok so far today. Not sure when next scan is. Should be my dating scan in the next 2-3 weeks.

Afternoon all

Been for lunch with another friend today (am now a lady wot lunches! ) She has a 5YO and a 1YO, and she is the most calm, chilled, fantastic parent. Frankly, I found it terrifying! Can't imagine ever being like that... She's SO active too, always taking them places and thinking of fun things to do with them.... oh dear...!

Sparkly glad to hear you have nothing to report. Even if you don't book in til 10 weeks that ought to be enough time to get your scan at 12 weeks, guess you'll have to wait and see... Haven't been sure whether to mention it to you for fear of giving you something else to worry about, but I've had something of a falling our with my doula over the last couple of days about how many scans it's ok to have and how often it's ok to listen to the hb...If any of you fancy a read it's all laid out on knicker checkers, together with some very helpful responses from some very wise ladies. Thread is here if any of you are interested... I didn't post it on here for fear of sending Sparkly into orbit, but I think maybe now you'll be ok Miss Sparkly... I'd be really interested to hear your opinions, in fact I was going to FB Teehee & Cricri about it...

This morning I booked some Active Birth Classes, whatever they are! But they come very highly recommended so fingers crossed! I'll be a busy bunny in June and July (or maybe just plain exhausted!) I've got antenatal classes on tuesdays, active birth on wednesdays and yoga on thursdays! Should keep me out of mischief!

Bella June date favoured by Georgie for the meet up and fine by me is 20th June - how is that for everyone else??

Lola I think you should send your doula packing! What an insensitive witch telling you all that when she knows that you have already had these scans! She doesn't seem to be very level headed and broadminded which surely she should be when offering a "service" As for going without scans throughtout the pg I take it she has never had an m/c I am so cross that she is making you worry like this! Don't pay her!!! I read the articles and I don't think it seems very researched if you know what I mean, the way things are worded are more inflammatory rather than informative and the sample group results were a little off. Please don't let it worry you and keep looking forward to seeing your LO again on Monday
Sparkly Glad to hear that things are OK today, how are things in your head though? Miss Negative Knickers?
EI Glad to hear you are keeping yourself busy I'll race you to a BFP!

had a megga breakthrough today! LEA have decided to offer all out of zone children who have siblings already at our school a place there!
This is purely because of the previous school closure, we will be getting an extra teacher! Head teacher has come up trumps for us. There's lots of other schools around here with big problems, they are all over prescribed and the LEA are sending the in zone parents who have no siblings to out of zone catchment areas. One school has had 71 applicants for 30 places, really dont know how they intend to sort this problem out! Oh well, I'm alright jack!!
kate thanks for that wonderful offer you put to me! X

Lola had a good old read and think your Doula may have overstepped the boundry, I don't see why anyone would put worries like that in someone's head at such a delicate and important time, it seems completely unprofessional! As for the doppler if you want soemthing less major the fetal listening montior I bought from Mothercare is great, and completely safe. I can't hear a heart beat but I hear lots of kicks which is really reassuring! it's only £29 and a light hearted option when compared to a doppler. By the way I completely understand you wanting to keep an 'eye' on lo while your away!

Emmsy that is great news!! Fantastic

Fruity how's Jack?? xx

Hello again all! What do we think of the Aprentice this year??

Emmsy That is fantastic news, what a relief for you
Lola I had a read of your thread but I haven't read the articles you linked to. I agree with what the others have said, but I must admit my doula had similar views - not about scans but testing for GBS in my case and a couple of other things. However, when it came to the actual birth and bf support she was fantastic. FB me if you want more details. For what it's worth, I had a scan at 7+3, 2 at 12 weeks (nuchal and NHS), 1 at 20 weeks, 1 at 27 weeks (4D), 1 at 34 weeks (kidnew dilatation) and the final one at 38 weeks and Elise has turned out just fine! Go with your instinct - if you feel hiring a doppler will put your mind at rest then do it. And have scans as often as you feel the need to. Stress from the mother is more likely to impact on baby than scans IMHO!
Sparkly How are you doing today? Hope you haven't had any more bleeding.
Hi to everyone else!

Hi ladies Once again I've been reading but really can't remember a lot of what's been written Friday night here and I'm 5min away from bed
Great that your son has a place at the school you want Emmsy, how frustrating for you though.
Lola, don't worry about your supermum friend, I'm sure she has bad days as well, & having a 5yr old must get shouty sometimes, I'm sure of it You're good with doing all your classes, I'm not doing any this time Figured after 1 c/s and 1 vbac whatever happens hopefully I'll remember something
How are you doing Sparkly, hope your weekend isn't too stressful & you get some peace of mind soon.
Have to admit Ei, when I read the selection criteria for who gets offered a place first at your daughter's possible school, I remembered why I left the UK. I know with more people they need to be more selective, but that would frustrate me so much, dealing with where you fit into a list
Otherwise have to admit I have been missing the UK a lot lately, maybe it's because the girls were both born there, so my memories of their pregnancies are tied up with the northern hemisphere
Feeling quite round this week and harder, looks like I've swallowed a bowling ball basically. I updated Mozilla and now FB is working nicely again so will put some photos on there this weekend.
Hi to everyone else

Morning everyone

Great news Emmsy seems like that has saved you months of wrangling - any news on your test results yet - just to finish the week off.

Sparkly Hope everything OK with you. Have a lovely holiday and try to stay positive. Won't be long before the 12 week check and maybe then you can start looking forward.

Lola Haven't read the articles but have looked at the thread. From what others have said it seems that the study and it's results are not very comprehensive and I think your doula is taking a very narrow view. As someone said on knicker checkers it is hard to see which way round the correlation is. Also, whilst I don't believe that negative thoughts cause pregnancies to fail I do think that a healthy and relaxed Mummy (well as relaxed as we can be after pg related disappointment and heartache) gives a baby the best start you can and if scans and dopplers help you (us) do that then surely it could be argued they are a positive thing. In fact I've just had a look in my Lelsey Regan book, which I think you have, which has a chapter called 'The value of tender loving care in early pregnancy', she seems to suggest that it can help success rates. In regards to your doula I know you would lose your deposit but surely that is better than spending even more money for a service that you aren't happy with. I am sure that you and DH will be 'up to' communicating what you want to the midwives and as far as bf is concerned there is lots of help available that isn't in the form of a Doula. The last thing you need either in labour or after is someone with strong anti-medical views and you want her to help with the bf not put pressure on you. I am quite at her giving her opinion so freely - if you want someone like that my Mum is extremely bossy and opinionated and would probably quote you a good price!!

Hope that's not all too long - but I've been mulling it over since last night! (plus I thought the Lesley Regan stuff was good to throw back at your doula!)

no results from scan yet, will let you know as soon as I get them!

found out the real reason why we all got our places! The LEA cocked up, and allocated an in zone parent with siblings at the school to an out of zone school. LEA had offered 5 other lower criteria cases before her! They informed her yesterday that they had made a mistake and that she would get in. Our head then knew that they would have to get an extra teacher as the figures had now gone to 31 (we are only allowed 30 in our infant classed!)so she spent the rest of yesterday on the phone pushing for us, she finally got a + outcome at 3.00pm Thank god for good old fashioned human error!

Hi guys,
Sorry haven't had much chance to read thread properly lately but just wanted to show you all this little bargain I got today I bought it in Mothercare but doesn't seem to be on their website. It was £25 instead of £50. It's quite big though so I might have to return it (my flat is tiny) but it's a lovely modern sleek design

Actually, ignore me, I've just put Jack in it and his head wobbles all over the place. It's going back!
Ah well........

That's it! I've caved already. Just asked DP to bring home a box of Aptamil.
I'm going mad. I've been feeding Jack for 4.5 hours solid.
Charlie's been miserable because I can't give him the attention he needs and don't want him resenting Jack. I've been screaming at Charlie all afternoon because he keeps demanding attention off me
So now I feel like a failure because I can't even last 2 and a bit weeks

I'm only going to give an evening bottle (That's even if he'll take it!). Thing is, this is exactly what I did with C. I ended up giving him mostly formula because it seemed to satisfy him a lot more making my life so much easier - even though I had to prepare bottles.

I just feel so crap now

Fruity Please don't feel bad, bf is such hard work. I had a 7-hour non-stop stint with Elise right at the beginning and it was so hard, I couldn't believe it was normal. You've got another child to take care of as well and you need to do what is right for all of you you. We gave Elise an evening bottle of formula for a good 5-6 weeks as by the end of the evening she was sucking on empty. The formula does enable them to go for longer between feeds but that's because it's so much thicker than breast-milk.
Could you put Jack in a sling so that he can just feed when he needs to and you can give Charlie the attention he needs? A sling was a life-saver for me - suddenly I could get out of my arm chair and do normal things again and Elise could carry on feeding.
Please don't feel like a failure - just feed Jack as much as you can and use formula when you have to. I know all the advice is to carry on feeding otherwise you compromise your milk supply, but this doesn't take into account real life IMHO, especially when you have other DCs.
You could try posting under the bf topic too to see if tiktok or one of the others has some useful advice.
Are you taking fenugreek? I found that really helped.
I hope Jack takes the bottle - Elise did and she never had any problems switching from breast to bottle and back again either.
Hope it works out - will be back tomorrow to see how you're getting on. xx

Thanks cricri Jack's having his first bottle of formula right now! And DP's giving it to him!

He has just demolished 1.5oz - loves it. You'd think he'd never been fed before Now he looks drunk

I'll get some fenugreek tomorrow if I remember. I think you mentioned it before. I've got a sling but I haven't found a comfy way of wearing it yet. Need to play around with it

I'll let you know how he sleeps tonight!

fuity hope things pan out soon. Don't be silly, your not a failure. You've managed to feed him this long. Totally agree with cricri no harm in giving jack formula now and again. Unfortunaltely that't all any of mine have ever had, but it hasn't affected their growth or academic ability in any way! Amy was feeding every 3 to 4 hours when she was as young as jack (infact, she's exactly the same now through the day, but sleeps a good 8-9 hours through the night!) I gave Amy her last bottle last night at appox 9.00pm, she's still snoozing now. Give jack as many formula feeds as you feel neccesary, especially when DP is in the house. Amy's lovely sleeping pattern started at approx 3 1/2 months, so hang on in there

Fruity Don't beat yourself up. You are doing a great job. A healthy, happy you is also important for both of your boys. It doesn't sound as if you are giving up entirely but even if you do- no guilt - OK!! Look we have bunnies to cheer you up!

Mollie Sounds like a promising batch of symptoms you have there - testing Weds right? I was thinking about your job the other day, quite often in my old place secondments would become permanent or at least another same grade job would come up. Do you think that's a possibility. Meant to text that to you last week but we went out.

Scully Sorry you're missing the UK, I can totally understand as it must all be so different, plus those hormones are raging.

Ei What strange criteria for your DD's school. How's the 2ww going with you.

Lola Meant to say the other day that my friend bought me the Mum to be sanctuary stuff and it is lovely- I've nearly used all the bump oil and moisturising cream and no stretch marks - YET!

Sorry my updates are a bit out of date - I've clearly been a bit rubbish this week. No news here (obviously otherwise would I really be posting!) Still haven't got car seat out but my toenails have been done and look very pretty so I have my priorities straight DP on hols now and am determined to carry on with life otherwise the two of us will just sit waiting. MW said baby is engaged but has wiggled round a bit (again) so back on the ball for me!!

Fruity hope Jack had a good night? and you? I know a lot of people who mananged combined feeding hope it works for you. Besides he's had all that goodness at the very start! lots of lovely antibodies etc.

Teehee what colour are you nails? I think that's a very important part of the whole preparation!

I'm having a shitty time at the mo, have a horrible suspicion that my depression is returning; I was on medication for a year or so when I fell pregnant. Can't seem to lift this mood I find weekends and hols (like now) really hard to stomach I like the distraction of work. DH is very unhappy in his job and is a complete arse at home, been getting worse since Dec. Don't have anyone to talk to anymore as can't afford the therapist and feel like a total twat for being so depressed when I have this wonderful little life growing inside me! And as Dh KEEPS reminding me, I begged him for a baby for years so what right do I have to complain!? I do feel terrible for being this way when I know I have it pretty good so why aren't I happy?

Sorry to be like this, typing it here helps me get a little of it off my chest.

Hope all is well elsewhere?

Morning

Well Jack had 3oz of formula last night. I think he would have liked more but it's hard to tell how much to give him as I have no idea how much he gets from breast feeding.
He seemed so much more relaxed and actually chilled on his playmat for about 10 minutes which is certainly a first! He even let me put him in his bed while he was wide awake. Didn't last long though. He decided he wanted to be in bed with me. He then slept until 4am! He usually wakes at 2am then 4am But then he was feeding on and off from 4am until I had a shower 10 mins ago. I had to put him in his bed much to his horror. He's actually quiet now which is why I'm taking advantage on MN - crap he's crying again.... I'm going to ignore him.

Mollie and Ei I really don't want to get your hopes up but I dreamt last night that you both got a BFP! Maybe there's more than one psychic on this thread!

Teehee I also painted my nails before I was due. However, I had to remove my nail polish before I went into theatre Took my bloody ages to paint them too - lots of huffing and puffing
You won't be going into theatre though

Last but not least Bella Is there anything I can do? We can meet for a coffee/chat anytime you like. As long it's not somewhere I have to drive to as I can't drive for a few more weeks. I'm pretty free until I go back to work on the 16th
You can borrow my shoulder anytime

The bunnies must be making you smile! xx

Thanks Fruity I might be in touch this week. Bunnies are cute

Fruity I'm really pleased Jack took the formula. I found Elise always looked drunk on it too As Bella said, he got all the important goodness from bf at the start, even if you were to give up now. Hope you find a compromise which works for you all.
Teehee I painted my toenails before having Elise too - the midwives and doula were delighted I'd got my priorities right! Carrying on with life as normal is a good plan as otherwise you'll go stir-crazy. Plus you'll have the best excuse in the world for cancelling when baby does decide to put in an appearance!
Bella Sorry you're feeling so down Can you speak to your mw or GP about your feelings and perhaps get referred to a counsellor that way? Ante-natal depression is a recognised condition (although I'm not saying you have it IYSWIM) and it's best to get help as soon as you realise you're struggling. A couple of the ladies on my PN thread are on anti-depressants for post-natal depression and the earlier it's caught the better, especially if you've suffered before. All the pg hormones in your body probably aren't helping either. Keep posting on here if it helps, we're here to listen. Meeting up with friends etc and having stuff to look forward to during the holidays is good too, as is just getting out of the house for a walk. Don't be hard on yourself though - you've got a lot going on atm, especially if things are difficult with DP. Hugs to you xx

Thanks cricri

Definitely no harm in combining bottle and breat Fruity, both my girls coped quite well with it. My sister is a midwife and she said that very few babies actually get nipple confusion, but obviously the baby is going to prefer the option he is seeing more of. And the nice thing is that formula takes longer to digest, so giving them the odd formula feed at night gives you a break and more sleep
I did like the bouncer you bought as well, pity it didn't work as well as it looked
I agree with Cricri, Bella, try and talk to someone soon, who can diagnose whether your depression is returning. You don't want to let things build up until after the birth, when you'll have more hormones to deal with, as well as being sleep deprived.
Sounds like the head of the school is really working hard for the parents Emmsy, no wonder you wanted to have all your children enrolled there. Glad it worked out for you Feel like I've spent most of today in the car, ferrying around dd1, but I'm not too tired which is nice. dh is having to go into work tomorrow so trying to think of something I can do with the dd's that they will enjoy and that won't wear me out

Emmsy Wonderful news that you can now get Ian into the same school Who cares if someone made a mistake, it went in your favour that's the main thing!
Lola How are you feeling about your doula now? Hope you're not quietly stressing somewhere
Scully Look forward to seeing the pics on FB
Fruity Don't feel about the BFing not working out as well as planned. You are doing your best and that's all anyone can ask for, take it easy on yourself, Jack will still grow up as adorable as C. Love the dream btw let's hope it comes true
Bella You can't help the way you are feeling so don't beat yourself up about it. Definately think that it would be a good idea to have a chat with your GP as there is still medication you can take when pg.
Sparkly Hope you are having a wonderful time away and doing some bloody relaxing
TeeHee Lol at having your toenails done! Glad to see you are all prepared, I'll be asking for daily updates soon!

Well it's CD25 for me and yesterday started spotting (brown) very early for AF which hasn't arrived yet just a little less spotting again today I am sure I am mentally setting myself for a huge crash next week but can't help thinking

Oh no I didn't do the cute ones!