The WIMBEWAIF and WIMBEWAINF 2WW club, new and existing members welcome.

[Bucky2008]

Ahhh, look how nice and clean and new this thread is .

And there is a big ScaryHairy birthday cake for us all to share. I am not being good till after Thursday afterall...

Hi all
Am I ok to join in?
Have just started ttc number 2 this week!
DP and I already have a 2yr old DS and after much nagging I have finally convinced dp that it is time for number two!

In preparation I have spent the last 6 months loosing 7 stones so that this time I can be a nice healthy mummy lol.

I am approx on CD17 (periods have changed a bit since loosing weight) and dp and I only managed to bd on day 13 so I dont hold out much hope for this first month but I suppose we have to start somewhere lol

Any way I hope there is lots of BFPS for everyone this month x

Hi readyfornum2 and welcome. Here's to a BFP for you this month.

Caitni have you tested yet? . Oh I do hope we get some good luck....

SH Big higs again. I am at a bit of a loss for words (for once). Nothing we say can make it better really, but you know you have lots of friends here to listen when you need a good moan. Just know that you can be sad as much as you want and you don't have to stay away whilst you feel that way. We are here to pick up each others peices at all times. And I will do my very best to think of something ridiculous to say to cheer you up.

PnM blue toes sounds v. horrid. It sounds like you are on the mend hopefully . Good for you for being so positive.

MOB How exciting. You are inspiring me. However, I am about to confess to the thing that is making DP and I hesitate about IVF. TMI ALERT: Whilst for months now I have been aware of my ov based on OPKs and temps etc, we generally stop bding immediately afterwards as we are knackered. Ov seems to be generally CD15-16 ish We start back up about CD21ish (at about a once a week rate). However, we are both a bit fed up now as after a two and a half years of going at it like rabbits, sex isn't fun anymore really, it just a means to an end and we can't get our mindset away from thinking like that. We have tried most things like romantic weekends and holidays, but we have had so many exhausted quickies on the important nights that we are rubbish at getting in the mood these days. Consequently, on reflection I think that if I am ov after CD15 and before CD20 that may be a big contributor to the BFNs. That said, we said we would make an effort to BD within that period this month, perhaps start the every other thing later in my cycle but once again we only made it to CD15 and today is CD20 (no bding in between). Anyway, my point is, if the BFNs are simply because we are not doing it at the right time then is IVF the right way to go? I have thought and thought about this, I mean after 2 and a half years we must have done it at the right time some of the months. In the first year and a half or so we did it continuously throughout the month . I don't know....

Morning all

SH really hope today goes OK for you. I second everything MOB and Bucky and Ei and PnM have said - always remember you can say whatever you want to us and we'll be here to support you through. You will pick yourself up and you will get a BFP that leads to a happy, healthy pregnancy and baby. You're in my thoughts

Bucky TBH we also stop BD-ing right after ov - only some months have we managed to bd the day after ov (as recommended by the fertility monitor and FF). So sounds to me like you're doing plenty. But, if it was me I think I'd want to make an appointment with the clinic for a certain date (eg November) and then BD every night/other night from BD 12 to BD 19 for the cycles in between. I know how hard this is (god, we've had some moments of DH being "unable to perform" and me just going ballistic about it - utterly terrible). That way you're giving your body a chance but you've also set a goal. MOB's advice about seeing a private consultant here to discuss options is also a good idea, and less of a step than Scanhealth...

Readyfornum2 welcome! And well done you for the weight loss - that's inspirational! I hope you get a BFP nice and quickly.

PnM poor you and your blue toes! Glad you're sounding so upbeat though. Roll on your next cycle!

Ei yay for ov! Hope you caught the egg as it would be great for you to have a BFP when you go to meet the consultant. He sounds excellent, which I'm glad of - only the best for you

MOB you must be getting excited about the appointment on Friday (though being a bit scared is totally normal too!). I think you're v smart to buy the IVF CD - mental attitude is a crucial element and you're giving your body (and mind) every chance to make this a success. You go lady!! Rather cheesily, this month I did things like thinking positive affirmative thoughts (along the lines of "I will get pregnant, I will get pregnant" lol) at random times during the day and night. And I think it helped because I've had long-rooted negative thoughts about conceiving (going back to an emergency appendectomy when I was 8 for a burst appendix).

Anyway, update from knicker watch HQ. Still no AF, so officially overdue (I'm now 14 dpo - luteal phase is 12 days) and a much better temp (up to 36.73 despite me taking it nearly 45 mins early as got out of bed at 5.45am, as just had to test!!). Two faint BFPs on FR (one quite faint one last night and a clearer, stronger one this morning - both verified by my excited but more rational DH ). But the bad news is that I got a "not pregant" from CB digi...so I'm going to re-test with the CB digi in three days (as per the instructions) and probably spend a fortune on cheapy tests in between! I can feel a burgeoning addiction to POAS developing that won't be satisfied until I get either my period or the magic "pregnant" on the CD digi!!

Sorry for the rambling message xxx

OHMYGOD . Bucky is whooping and jiggling around in her chair liek a woman possessed as she writes this. Oh stupid CB digitals . But to BFPs is surely a positive????? Yay AND no AF!!!!. I am going now because I am too excited for Caitni and I am going mad with anticipation. Can I at least whisper a congrats???? ....

So excited in fact I made at least a million typos on that last post .

SH am thinking of you today - echoing (sp?) everyone elses thoughts re coming on here when you're ready. Big higs and am cyber hand holding all day xx

Bucky I think you are very wise to consider all possibilities but agree with Caitni that maybe making an appt for some time in the future would give you something to work towards? Also ditto what MOB says about seeing a private consultant here.

MOB - I think you're absolutely right to try whatever it takes to help you through. Approached in the right way, the CD can only benefit you - if only to give you 30mins or so to totally concentrate on YOU and what you are going to be going through. Your emotions must be all over the place at the mo! I'm excited for you though!

Hi and welcome to readyfornum2! Ei yay for ov!!! And fingers crossed timings were all good this month!

Lastly, but certainly not least, can I utter a quiet CONGRATS to Caitni ? Wow! I'm so chuffed for you! Will be watching your poas addiction with interest for the next installment! Wow again! Just really really happy for you!!

News from me - af/leo arrived this morning. Luckily little pain as am on pretty strong painkillers (for foot) but no choc in the house and am feeling the need to start mainlining the green&blacks and can't get out the house to buy any!! Grr....!!

PnM & Bucky thanks for your congrats - it all feels quite strange but I'm very happy (even my knicker checking is less feverish than yesterday ).

PnM you poor thing - no green&blacks! I feel for you, . Hope your DH remembers to bring some home

Hello all,

I'm so sorry SH . I'll be thinking of you and your family.

bucky I can understand completely why you are putting off getting the IVF ball rolling. MOB gave a good bit of advice about having a chat through all your options with a consultant before you decide.

PnM Ring your DH to order he brings you lots of your favourite chocolates home!! Poor you not being able to get out of the house.

ei FF lines! Hurrah. Hopefully you won't need that appointment

MOB Glad things are progressing so quickly with you.

caitni Congratulations! CBD are not very sensitive from what I've read so I wouldn't worry about that. A line is a line and all that!

I'm off on holiday this weekend so I won't be popping in for a while. Take care everyone.

hi ladies
SH iv been thinking of you today and i hope you are as well as can be expected xx take care of yourself xxx {{{{{{{{{higs}}}}}}}}}}
caitni congrats on your BFPs!!!! im so happy for you
bucky i understand your reluctance to get the ball rolling ivf wise. i imagine it would feel something like admitting there may be a problem and i am struggling with that concept myself as are quite a few of us here unfortunately it may well be a timing issue like you say and if you feel strongly about it why not set yourself a limit? like say if you BD throughout the time before and straight after ov for say they next cycle after this one (if you dont get a bfp before then) and it still results in af at the end then maybe book an appointment then. that way you have a plan to stick to and something to look to with each eventuality iyswim]smile] tell me to shut it if i am talking waffle though by all means
mob good luck with your appointment
hi to everyone else
4dpo for me today
xx ei xx

Hello ladies

Crumbs, i was too busy to log on yesterday, and look what i missed! Caitni a tentative, tiny, congratulations!! Hope you get a lovely digital BFP very soon. Do keep us updated

SH Hope you are recovering well from the op. Thinking of you, as ever.

JB Have a lovely holiday!

PnM on the arrival of LEO, even though it was expected. Hope you found some chocolate!

readyfornum2 welcome! Look forward to getting to know you. Well done on losing so much weight.

Bucky I would echo what everyone else has said -

Whoops! My computer suddenly told me it was going to re-start, so i quickly posted what i'd written so i didn't lose it. I'll carry on now!

Anyhow, Bucky, as i was saying, it does seem that you want to try timing things a bit differently - perhaps you have been stopping a bit prematurely. Don't tire yourselves out but maybe start later in your cycle. As other have said, perhaps give yourselves a couple of cycles like that, but book an appt for after that (either here or in Norway) so that you have something to focus on and motivate you if your efforts don't succeed. I checked on your profile you are 35, so you have time to do things at your pace, and when you are ready.

EI how are things with you today?

When is GG back?? She seems to have been away for aaaaaaages . Good old judith!!

Not much to report here. Am eagerly looking out for ov signs, as i want to get this cycle over with as quickly as possible! Trouble is, i'll probably delay things by focussing too much on it. Better go and listen to my cd and relax!

hello hello . I am returned from my mamoth holiday and a bit later back into the country than I thought, because DH booked the flights and I thought we were back on Tuesday, but I got that wrong and we didn't reach Heathrow until 5.30am this morning . It was a 13 hour flight, but we got an upgrade!!! . It was bliss, and we could lie back in flat beds and watch films until dropping off under a snowy duvet for a healthy 8 hours of kip. It's a hard life being Mr and Mrs Gorgon . We did a real "get away from it all break" (deliberately to avoid work) so we didn't have internet access at all and there was so much to catch up on here.

I was so excited at being back on MN again and "seeing" all my WIMBEWAIF friends, but there has been so much going on . Both and very news.

Scary - am stunned and so, so upset for you and that it was another ectopic . It seems like the cruelest of things to happen to you and I am gutted, really gutted, that such a lovely person as you has this happen.

I saw that you had an operation yesterday and if you can bear to be on here, I just wanted to say you have been in my thoughts all morning since I read your post (two days late, I am so sorry) and I hope that the operation went ok and you are recovering from the physical pains. Please let us know how you are doing, both physically and emotionally. We are all here for you. I don't know where to begin typing things here that don't sound like crass platitudes, but things will get better. If you want to meet up for a drink and a rant, if it helps, when you have recovered, I am always about. Take good care of yourself and I hope work are being great

Bucky - you sound like you've had a rough old time of it too in the two weeks I have caught up on. The paragraph you wrote about all the agony, emotional turmoil and frustrations and your feelings about TTC should be framed and put at the top of all long term TTC threads, because you summed the everything up so perfectly for me and everyone. Sometimes I think we should all write a collaborative book together - all the WIMBEWAIF-ers, maybe extracts from our threads and throughts, because I don't know how I would have got through the last 20 months or so without you all and Mumsnet. You guys keep me (relatively ) sane.

Have you called the IVF clinic in Norway yet? Norway sounds excellent. There was someone on one of the long term TTC threads here (I have post-holiday brain and I can't remember who now, but maybe LondonLottie or CityAngel on the TTC#1 Since Forever thread or the Assisted Conception thread? ) who was in touch with an excellent IVF facility in Sweden and was really impressed by their professionalism. It sounds like a really positive step to call them and also to get the bottom of the fybroid question with the NHS here. Get the run away doctor to answer some questions. Have you had any more trouble with your mean and nasty chav neighbour about Finn? If no-one else is complaining about barking, there can't be much of an issue, but I'd have been very rattled by someone being so agressive. Horrible for you.

DG - If you are reading this thread, I have a wee tear in my eye about being a cyber-auntie . It doesn't seem 5 minutes since we were sitting around discussing our lack of TTC luck and now you have your gorgeous Alfredo. I am off the check his photos on Facebook the minute I finish typing this out! I am so thrilled for you - really, really thrilled. It's the best back from holiday news!

MOB - that is fabulous news about the ICSI and the results from the clinic . You will be way ahead of me and I will have to come to you for advice on it when my turn comes (more later on that ). I had a feeling that everything would be fine for you . from what I read, they only need a tiny handful of happy swimmers for ICSI, so I was sure there are more than enough, even with a low sperm count, for ICSI. I am delighted for you

Big welcome to readyforno2! Hope you get a big fat BFP this month. What are you doing to improve chances - I am always on the look out for new TTC tips.

lou - any luck this month? When is AF due for you?

As for me, AF arrived on the last day on my holiday, three days early . I had my hopes up a little to be honest, that this would be my month . DH and I did "it" A LOT this month, we wewre having such a good break (everything seemed to be perfect) and then about 5 days before AF was due I got some spotting. Oh, and burst into tears at a book and noticed my nails were rather strong and long . I NEVER get any spotting during a cycle (can't remember a single occasion), so worked myself up into a delerious frenzy of excitement, assumed it was an implantation bleed, became rediculously happy, refused glasses of wine and prawn salads and waited until I could get back from trecking through the jungle to get a Clearblue. But, erm, it wasn't to be for us (again) . AF arrived and, when it did, it was the period from HELL. Not much fun on a long flight. I also had a bit of a breakdown and was howling away in the hotel. I cried myself out this time. DH was really kind, but he finds too much female emotion a bit disconcerting and he held me for ages, but he gets uptight because quietly he thinks that I blame him, even though I said over and over how much he meant to me and that I didn't.

This TTC stuff is so bl**dy hard!!! I think this has been the toughest AF for me so far and I am so emotional. I got a mysterious email from my best friend saying she had been trying to call me with some news. I am pretty sure I can guess what the news is and I am feeling so fragile that I have been a bad, bad friend and not responded to her email, because I don't think i can bear her telling me what I think she is going to say . Then I got into the flat this morning and waiting on the doormat was my rather brisk referral letter for IVF. I start drug treatment in January at the Hammersmith Hospital with the first cycle in February. Happy New Year GorgonsGin.

So now I am scared as well as fragile and also my job security is looking a little bleak....I had a run in with my boss just before my holiday, we are very quiet at the moment due to the market downturn and suddenly there are a few things that I noticed this morning that makes me think I am vulnerable. We call my boss Delores Umbrage (if you've seen the Harry Potter films, you can guess what she is like ). What a mess .

Eek, sorry, it's another me me me rant (and a long one too!)and I am only just back here this morning .

Thanks for being fabulous everyone. You are The BEST!

jeez, that's an essay I just wrote!
Post holiday blues must make you type loads

Bllody hell and I missed all the stuff I planned to say to you caitni and how bloody EXCITED I am for you!! A big fat BFP is exactly what we need round here to give us some hope.

You must be thrilled. How did your DH take it? Is he over the moon? . IT's ther best news. How was your holiday? I must give myself another one soon

will check in with you all later

Cooooeeeee! Where are you all?

Nobody loves me anymore....

GG I'm here! And we love you!! It's so lovely to have you back - we've missed you ! And so glad you and Mr GG got to have a proper, no internet holiday (capped with the upgrade, how swish!!). But I'm so sorry to hear La Evil One got you though - it's so hard, the rollercoaster of emotions to you. Your DH sounds like such a good support. And you're not a bad friend for not responding to your friend's email - you only just landed in the UK at half five this morning! Coming back from holidays is the perfect cover for a few days procrastination to be ready to be happy for your friend (having said that, I've got a friend in D.C. that had a baby three weeks ago and I'm still procrastinating sending the proper joyful email & card/present - so I'm not really one to talk!). Sorry to hear about the job worry - hope things pick up soon.

MOB good luck tomorrow with your appointment! Hope this cycle flies by for you

Ei I hope you get your BFP this month - keeping my fingers crossed xx

JollyBear hello! Hope that you and Jollycub are doing well!

SH hope you got on OK yesterday - sending you lots of cyber support and to you.

Bucky hope you're doing well today xx

Thanks for the congrats MOB GG Ei and JB - it's such early days for me (4 wks + 3 days) that it all feels quite unreal...bar the sore boobs, tiredness and peeing! I'm still on ferocious knicker watch (tmi alert: it feels quite wet down below so keep thinking, "oh no La Evil One has just arrived"...so rush to bathroom to nervously check and nothing). A big part of me thinks that perhaps I just ovulated late and that LEO is about to arrive (typical...the one month when I can't pinpoint ovulation almost to the second is the one month I get a faint BFP). I'm too nervous to join any AN thread, which seem to be full of lovely ladies with heaps of symptoms and experience of pregnancy. Too intimidating for me at the moment! My DH is happy, but probably even more nervous than I am. I'm off to register with a doctor tomorrow morning as had not got around to it after we moved to Brighton . Doubt I'll get an appointment before next week at this rate but hopefully it'll all start to feel a bit more real if I can make it that far with no AF.

Enough rambling from me!
Caitni xx

Ahh, the wanderer returns . Yay, glad your back GG and you sound like you got a lot of R&R which is good. You sound like you were having ups and downs like the rest of us which I wish I could magic away for everyone.

SH Are you ok poppet? . Well, obviously you are not, but you know what I mean....Just know we are all thinking about you. I even told DP and he is waiting to hear that you are on the mend. .

Ei How things, I haven't given you a shout of for a while. Thanks for your advice (and to everyone else too), you are right I will set myself some deadlines. I checked out the flights to Norway and they are a bit b*ggered though. Only one flight in which is then the flight out per day on Tues/Thurs and Sun. I was hoping for the first appointment to have just one overnight stay, as I am running out of holidays at work, but that isn't going to work. . I am fretting about the pups too, as I would have to put them in kennels....

And good evening tidings to all my other WIMBEWAIF buddies. PicknMix how is the leg hanging today? Did you get your chocs?

hi ladies
judith GG great to see you back sounds like your holiday was fab with the exception of LEO turning up and spoiling the last few days good luck with this next coming cycle and i think just bite the bullet with your friend and email her back as the news will be no less upsetting whether it is now or at another time i have done this with another friend of mine who has recently announced her preg and she is due near to the time i would have been with my last MC she also announced her first preg about a week after my first MC as she waits til after her 12 week scans to announce. both times she knew about my problems and both times she basically sed "sorry for your loss guess what im preg" in the same breath!! ahh well some things are always hard for people to be sensitive about i suppose i hope you are ok and you have a gorgeous golden tan from all that bali sunshine
bucky hi i hope you are ok and currently seeing some promising symptoms what dpo are you? im 5dpo aparrantly we might be testing buddies
SH i hope you are doing well and are not suffering from your op xxx
hi to MOB and caitni and all our preggo lurkers
im pretty sure my ov date is right as m y temp shift has been quite obvious so definitely 5DPO for me so i have about a week til i should test according to my LP but 9 days according to FF who knows eh! i think me and DH timed it quite well but as usual i am not getting my hopes up (despite the achey boobs, headaches, tiredness and a strange dizzy/fluffy feeling to my head) so im not watching out for symptoms...apart from those ones
xx ei xx

Hi ladies
It's me, SH, back from the hospital with a new name to commemorate.

Firstly, congratulations to Caitni. I know it's a feint line but honestly after months of clear BFNs, you know when there is a line, don't you? Have you got the magic CBD yet?

And welcome back to GG. I'm glad the holiday was fun, notwithstanding the arrival of LEO. And with all the ttc malarky and you and your DH both working so hard it's really important that you get some decent time together to remind you that you're not just on a baby-making mission. So yay for holidays!

I hope you caught that egg Ei. I am expecting good news from you...

Welcome to readyfornum2. Wishing you a short stay on the TTC threads!

Bucky it does sound like you need to review the timing a bit. Can you manage sex every 2 days through your cycle and a bit more in days 15-20? If not, maybe try for every 3 days and use preseed? I've been hearing good things about those Scandinavian clinics too (although I have visions of them churning out identikit blonde children) as if my remaining tube is not as good as it looks we'll need to go for IVF too...

I hope your toes have become pink again PnM and that being an invalid is not too dull.

MOB I didn't realise you too have succumbed to the lure of the relaxation CD! Does yours make you melt like butter too?

Update from me... the doctor tried to save my tube but I bled a lot so in the end they just removed it. The other one looks pink and perfect (I saw some photos!) and my ovaries look good too. There is no sign of any abnormality so it looks like my first ectopic was just one of those things and the second one may have been the result of the damage caused by the first. Either way I now have a very sore belly button. Bucky when you had your lap, how long were you sore for? I want to be able to move again! The doctor said to wait a few months before trying again but also that it wouldn't do any harm if I got pregnant sooner, which I am taking as my cue to get back on with things as soon as I stop hurting. I may wait one cycle but only if I feel like it! The Dr said he expected to see me at the ante-natal clinic in a few months so that has cheered me up.

Thanks for all the support and higs the last week or so. It's been pretty shocking but it means a lot to have you all on my side.

Morning all,

SH/UNI its lovely to hear from you. I'm very that they were unable to save your tube but really really pleased that there are no signs of abnormality and your remaining tube is rivaling GGs pristine innards. Hope your DH is ok and looking after you well whilst you're in pain. More higs and love for you xx

GG tis lovely to have you back! I missed you and still love you (even if you did leave me and my broken bones off your mammoth post ). Your holiday sounds like bliss (apart from af arrival - horrible for you ) with no outside world interruptions. I think you are perfectly ok to ignore friends email request for a few days, you need to 'regroup' after your holiday anyway and if you think its gonna be a difficult phonecall then its best to make sure you're in the right state of mind for it. I'm really sorry to hear that af arrival has really taken its toll this month, your DH sounds lovely and I'm pleased he can support you - it must be so tough for him as well. God this ttc lark is just plain tough isn't it? No-one told me it would be quite so fraught with pitfalls and I just feel so much for each and every one of us on this thread.

Heard a phrase the other day that I liked - 'hormotional' which sums me up today!

Hows the not-symptom-spotting-apart-from-achey-boobs-headaches-tiredness-and-a-strange-dizzy/fluffy-feeling-t o-your-head going Ei? . Have fingers and, well, just fingers crossed for you (plaster cast puts paid to anything else being crossed!) - only a week to go!

Bucky - bugger about the flights across to Norway. Is there no way it will work for you? If I could, I'd come and look after your doggies for you but I'd have to bring my rabbit and I'm not sure Fin would appreciate that!

Did you get a Dr's appt Caitni? Still smiling at your bfp!

Any sign of ov yet Mob?

Lovely to see you JB, hope you have a fab holiday

Hi to Lou if you're lurking!

I'm off work today and it is truely glorious sunshine this morning - can't really go anywhere to enjoy it but it makes the view from my sofa more appealing! Choc has been duly bought and consumed Bucky - DH very good and knows the catestrophic results of a PnM without chocolate...!

AF almost gone (only lasted 2 days ) but I've got to the stage now where a new cycle doesn't herald the return of optimism. Still got a month left until DH's SA - feels like forever away and I'm guessing it'll prob take twice as long for the results to come through.... Oooo, must give myself a shake and a slap!!

The shake and slap was to bring me out of my self-obsessed fug - not sure the sentence really made sense though!

hello! 'Tis me, GG I thought I'd name change for a few days.

Arghhh *picknmix, I am so sorry. I knew last night I had left you off my mammoth post and I had an attack of the guilts at about 2am (jetlagged, I was awake ) that I hadn't included you. How is your poor foot feeling and you did make me laugh with the "extreme tennis" comment, he he. I hope it's hurting less now and are you more mobile?

scary/Unituber - you have made me laugh with your new nickname . Phew! My DH was worried about you too. I told him last night what had happened and he emailed this morning to see if we'd heard from you on WIMBEWAIF, so we have all been cheering for you. I am so glad to hear you are feeling ok, despite the discomfort of the pierced belly button and you can joke with some black humour about what happened. But I am so that they didn't manage to save the tube, but if the other one was prisine, that's bl**dy fantastic. It will happene for you, I know it.

Bucky - for you about the lack of flights to Oslo and the holiday issues. Is there any compromise that could be done at work about a day unpaid leave or something? I know the logistics are a bit daunting, but they sounded such a great outfit.

ei - you are absolutely right about contacting my friend. I came round to that way of thinking and whatever happens she is a lovely person and I am really pleased for her. It is not her fault we are having difficulties TTC, so it seems nasty to be so self obsessed at her good news. It just came at a bad moment and she is a little tactless. I'll call her tomorrow . I was feeling very "poor me" for a few days, but I am much cheerier now (because plannign my next trip always cheers me up . No, I am JOKING! Really, honestly! No more trips planned for now )

hello to caitni and MOB and all the other regulars and newbies, up the duff or otherwise

Spoke to the Hammersmith and tried to book my pre-consultation appointment in December, one month before beginning my scheduled treatment in January, like they asked me to in the letter. They said there was no pre-consultation appointments available in the whole of December, so I got really worried and asked if that meant that beginnign my treatment in January was in doubt or would be postponed!? They said said "No, we have to fit you in in December, your treatment will be in January. But we can't give you any appointment because there are none" "So what happens now and where does that leave me? I don't mind waiting at the end of the day for an appointment" "Erm, I don't know what happens. We'll call you back"

Originally, I was quite happy with the NHS. So far a good experience and I didn't even mind the slowness and waiting, because it gave me time to come to terms with the possibility of IVF and because I held out a tiny hope we would conceive naturally before assisted conception was needed, but I am now beginnign to worry. I've heard so many tales of the inefficiencies and poor communication.

Just a quick post from me - spotting started this morning and seems to be getting heavier, redder blood, with cramps (I never get cramps) and (tmi alert) and some clotty stuff...looks like this bean isn't sticking. I'm pretty upset - leaving the office with a "stomach bug" as can't face an afternoon of feeling like crying in our open plan office. Will check in later and catch up on everyone's news.

SH/UniT so glad to hear from you.

Oh shit Caitni I'm really really sorry to hear this. Absolutely right to head home you poor thing. Please take care of yourself and let us know when you get home safely. Everything I write sounds like fluff but I'm thinking of you and sending you big cyber hugs. xx

Arg - I am sorry Caitni. Take care of yourself. What was your temp doing this morning?

Thanks to Mr GG for his concern. It's funny - hardly anyone I know in r/l knows what's been happening, but it is still nice to have you lot and people out there in the ether pulling for me. GG re your appointment, do you think the hospital mean they don't book pre-consultation appointments this far in advance? Sometimes I think the people who answer the phone don't explain themselves too well... Don't worry re the NHS. I know they seem disjointed and, IME, they lack the time to put much "care" (you know, the feely touchy stuff) into looking after you, but the Doctors will really know what they are doing on the medical side which is the important thing.

(BTW, I wanted to add, I'm not too bothered about the tube being removed. Since 2 eps happened on that side I can only assume it would have gone on to cause more. With it gone I stand half a chance...)