CD1 ttc after loss carry on thread #3

[Ladyinpink1]

I went to reply and you were right, the thread was full so I couldnt post a link to a new thread, also, because it's a new thread it wont give me a prediction to tag when I type a name, so I have just copied and paste the names off of everyone who posted on the very last page of the thread, I hope anyone else can find it OK. Sorry, maybe there is an easier better way... if anyone else can remember extra names and spellings, please tag 🙂

@samilicious

@Wise0wl

@ThelastRolo20

@13lucy

@Bugdem123

@HerbaceousPerennial

@UrsulaSings123 Just wanted to send you a hand-hold and say that how you are feeling is totally natural and nothing to be sorry for. Like others have said, your loss is still so recent and raw - be gentle with yourself, and definitely don't beat yourself up for finding it hard to be happy about other pregnancy announcements. It's not a lot of help right now, but it does get easier - for now, just feel what you need to feel and never feel bad about it. ❤️

@Ladyinpink1 yeah, this month and last month too - ever since that evap line I'm just trying to focus on my health and happiness and if a baby happens, great. Hard to switch tack when it comes to dtd and stuff though. Hoping coming away from tests and focusing on myself will get me more in tune with my body so when I'm "in the mood" it's because I'm more fertile - if that makes sense. I stead of just seeing possible fertile signs like CM and going for it then. I'm back on the exercise after @Wise0wl mentioned it and feel amazing mentally if nothing else!

Did my Joe Wicks app this morning and went to that baby 1st bday party where my grumpy ex friend was. I was supercharged with energy and although I hid in the corner for a bit, I bit the bullet and just went up to her being friendly and met the new baby. She was still grumpy so walked off but then after she came up to me and we caught up a bit on our first/my only borns and how we're both doing. It's unexpectedly made me feel like I'm on cloud nine, feel like it's a proper full circle moment. Just having the guts to face the situation head on

@Bugdem123 so glad that gave you comfort and made sense ♥️ how you feeling in your tww? The antibiotics did the trick! Feel ok now thank god

@UrsulaSings123 it's still so fresh - please don't judge yourself or feel bad. Just take things as they come and let all your emotions out in a safe space ♥️

@ThelastRolo20 another one!!! Good way to think about it though - no more for a bit. There must be something in the water where you are, so when it's your time bound to have a lovely healthy time all the way to term next time 🤞🏻

TW: Pregnancy update, skip over if you don't feel like reading

Just a quick update as promised from my scan today - all went well, baby is now measuring a bit ahead so I was dated at 13 weeks (was 12+3 by LMP and baby was a day behind at my previous scans). Still feeling cautious as we've now got to wait for the combined screening results, but so far so good - we're heading away on holiday tomorrow so it's nice to be able to go knowing that everything is okay as far as we can know right now. Thank you for all of the lovely supportive messages, it honestly does blow me away every time I come into this thread.

Wishing you all a lovely weekend, and I hope there are lots more BFPs coming soon to add to all of the good news over the last few days. ❤️

@UrsulaSings123 i think we all empathise with how you’re feeling and have been there ourselves. Take some time and be kind to yourself. Have you explored seeing a counsellor? I found it so helpful to help me process.

@samilicious yes! I was worried about exercising today (in case it brought on spotting) but I went anyway and feel great! Those endorphins are so helpful aren’t they

@CluelessInLondon I’m so so pleased for you!

@Wise0wl Thank you. ❤️ How are you doing now? Did you have any more spotting after the other day?

@CluelessInLondon I’ve had a little bit - sorry if it’s TMI but it’s mainly just been after a BM, but it’s only been when I’ve wiped, it’s never marked a pad or anything. I’ve had both a successful pregnancy with spotting and one unsuccessful with spotting (and one unsuccessful with no spotting) so who knows. I can’t wait for the day that I’m not constantly checking the loo roll though. Glam life!

@CluelessInLondon I had it in my mind to message you today but forgot. So so happy ♥️ if it makes you feel better, at my tfmr 12w scan the sonographer knew straight away that it was one of the screening big 3 - so if they didn't say anything, your chances are good! Brain shape and fluid are the big ones and you'd already be referred if anything looked untoward

@Wise0wl oh god, the wiping. Well I recently bought that naked sprout loo roll trying to be all eco friendly, not realising it's bloomin BROWN so I'm literally holding it up to the light half the time 😅 trying to stop doing that though! Fingers crossed all is well, wouldn’t be alarmed based on your spotting history 😘

@samilicious it’s such a head f*ck isn’t it? I did another test this morning and though it’s not quite as dark as I’d like it to be, it’s darker than Thursday’s. My plan is (because I love a plan) to contact EPU after the Easter weekend, and until then I’m just trying not to think about it (ha, it’s all I think about!) hope you’re having a nice weekend lovely x

@Wise0wl Hopefully that's a good sign then that the spotting isn't an ongoing thing. Does the toilet paper checking ever stop in pregnancy? It definitely hasn't for me yet, I didn't even dare stop wearing a liner in my knickers until I had my second scan just after 9 weeks!

@samilicious Thank you for sharing your experience, that must have been so horrible to go through but I really appreciate the reassurance. ❤️ The NT measurement was within normal range so that was a big relief to see, and the sonographer said everything looked as he would expect, so just hoping nothing crops up on the blood test.

Congratulations @GoldDustWoman90 I'm sure you are nervous, and it's so hard not to keep testing isn't it. x

It's so close @ThelastRolo20 you have done so well to wait, you really have great will power. But won't be long now until you are joining us with a nice relaxed egg after your holiday 🙂 x

@Wise0wl that's good, I think talking with someone who doesn't know anything about you or judge you is really great. Will you go again for another appointment? Thank you, I hope so too x

I relate so much to everything you said @UrsulaSings123 and you should not feel bad about that one bit, you are still right in the raw stage and your body and hormones will still be all over the place too which makes everything harder. And you have been through something really unatural and difficult so obsessing about being pregnant again is completely normal, I think we have all done that on here, it's a bit of a coping mechanism... it's what I have done since my loss. Sending you a tight hug and always feel able to speak your mind on here xx

I'm sorry you have been finding things so tough, glad to hear that it's been liberating for you dropping the "trying" side of things @Bugdem123 I am on cd1 today so the no bbt, no opks etc begins now, hoping I find it the same as you x

@samilicious well done, sounds like you were brave and took the high ground and it has paid off. Oh the Joe Wicks ones are pretty hard aren't they, i'm sitting with my tea and big bar of Galaxy mint thinking about how I should probably try to exercise more lol x

@CluelessInLondon that's brilliant news, I am very pleased for you and I feel like that's a really good milestone to have hit I cant remember exact odds but i do remember from researching before, they are super high from now on for you at this stage. x

Morning all. I've just got back from holiday and really struggling. Spent most of the holiday ill which has completely messed up my cycle. Was convinced I was going to ovulate early this week but ended up with a slight fever and then temp came back down. Then yesterday I had a peak but this morning my temp is still low. I feel so low right now and like things will never work out. Sorry to chuck this on here but I need to get it out of my system and just don't know what to do with myself. I really thought I'd be pregnant by my due date but looks very unlikely now.

Anyone know whether it's likely that I'll still ovulate or whether my body is skipping ovulation this month?

@13lucy So sorry you’re feeling so low and please don’t apologise for sharing on here, which is very much a safe space.

What CD are you on? I’ve found that being ill has delayed ovulation for me in the past. I hope that’s the case for you x

@13lucy big hugs to you ♥️ rubbish that you were ill on holiday and it's messed up your ovulation. I don't know if it would skip ovulation as you need to ovulate to have a period surely? That's what my gp said to me when I was trying first time - if you have periods you're ovulating. Hope things settle down a bit soon ♥️

@CluelessInLondon congratulations 🩷 I'm so pleased for you. Hopefully the rest of your pregnancy is dull and uneventful x

@Ladyinpink1 I'm really surprised at how much I've liked not tracking. I've done one OPK but that's a huge difference to the 3 or 4 I was doing a day. Not tracking my BBT has made a huge difference. I have thought a few times about putting my watch back on but so far managed to resist. It's definitely been a good thing for me - hopefully it's the same for you!

@13lucy im so sorry you're having such a hard time and had such a crap holiday. Is it possible that if your peak OPK was yesterday, that you're ovulating today so you'll have a temp shift tomorrow? That tends to be how it works for me. I know how you feel about it not happening by the due date. This is my last go too and I know how devastated I'm going to be to get a BFN in 10 days. Sending you a big hug x

Thanks all, just really starting to lose hope and my life still feels on hold until I'm pregnant again.

@Wise0wlI'm on CD21 but usually ovulate by CD19. I've also had it delay ovulation in the past but never had LH peak without temp rise.

@samilicious I hope so too. Last year I didn't have a period for 3 months so assume that's just super delayed ovulation. I've heard of people getting an anovulatory cycle where they don't ovulate but get a period. Not happened to me before though! Longer cycles are so tiring with DTD though!

@Bugdem123 let's hope so, although I usually get a shift the day after peak. It's so disheartening isn't it and I'm feeling like such a failure. I really hope it works out for you this cycle! It's good that tracking less has been helping you, it can be a bit intense can't it! I've done my own version of this which is taking my heart rate and HRV off my watch so I can't see it!

@13lucy oh I'm sorry things are tough right now. I think a high temp can marginally throw things out but normally not by much. There's absolutely still a chance this this cycle, I'd maybe just stop the tracking and have sex every 2/3 days? Might take away some of the anxiety of trying to figure out charts etc but of course do what's best for you x

Guyyyyyys advice needed! Tomorrow afternoon I have my next specialist appointment (mainly around recurring miscarriage but she's always happy to talk general fertility too). Af is due Wednesday, tomorrow is cd27. Even though it's unlikely to be my month, is it worth me testing in the morning?

If by some miracle I was pregnant this month I'd be able to discuss the plan of action with her immediately which would be amazing. But I'm also conscious of how unlikely it is and wonder if that bfn would make me really sad. All thoughts welcome as I'm completely torn!

Hey @moosey89, I would test. If it’s positive or negative I would feel it’s worth being able to discuss the outcome of this cycle with the specialist personally, but I know it’s easier said than done, and generally have always waited for AF as I find a bfn so hard. Could you pee in a cup so you can postpone the decision and see how you’re feeling a bit later on?!

Thanks @Wise0wl - I'm the same as you and wait for af to arrive (as she so annoyingly always does!). I'm 99% sure I'm out but could be worth knowing for sure.... Pee in a cup is always an option 😂

@moosey89 peeing in a cup to delay decision-making has been a very frequent part of my TTC journey 😂

@moosey89 I would just in case. Could you write down the pros and cons of each option to think it through? If you get any useful information you'll have to let us know!

@ThelastRolo20 I hope so. Problem is that this makes me feel like I need the BBT testing more as I don't trust my body. Just can't win!

Thank you for your lovely messages yesterday. I had a bit of a cry to myself and I feel slightly better today. I just want to say how grateful I am for the support I've received on this thread and I've only been here a short time. The experiences we have as women really do bind you together doesn't it. Thank you so much, they genuinely helped.

I made the decision to stop checking BBT. I was sooo close to putting my thermometer back by my bedside last night and resisted and I'm so glad I did. The reason I started measuring it was to check if my temp rose after ovulation, and it did, so there's no need to carry on tracking. I just know if I saw a drop in temp over the next week I would feel so disappointed because apparently your temp stays raised if you're pregnant, and I didn't want to base my feelings off a 0.2 degree change in temperature! I am going to test from 10 dpo (next saturday) because that's when I've had positives before and I'm going out that evening. But once I've done that I'm just going to test once each day until my period. If by some miracle its positive then I'm not going to test again. Last time I did about 18 pregnancy tests and was tracking 'progression'. Just sort of 'saying it out loud' so I stick to it! 😂

@13lucy sorry you're feeling so rotten. This is the only month I have tested for BBT and if its worth anything it rose 2 days after ovulation. I read online it can rise 1 - 2 days post ovulation so maybe that's what will happen for you. Its horrible having a looming date. I fell pregnant with my son about 6 weeks after my first baby was due and having that date go by with no baby was very difficult. I had to go home from work as I couldn't stop crying. It was just before Christmas. I hope it happens for you soon. And sorry your illness happened while you were on holiday - sounds miserable!

@Wise0wl I hope the spotting calms down and EPU are able to offer support when you call them.

@Bugdem123 personally if it was me I would be testing as that would help inform me about what I wanted to discuss with the specialist. That and I'm a serial tester so there's no way I'd be able to wait until CD27 anyway 😂 hope it's good news for you.