2024 TTC 35+ Part 1

[VixFromThe6ix]

New year, new thread!!!

Positive thoughts and baby dust for everyone this year!!!

@CurlyWurly1991 that increased risk at 38 weighed heavy on my mind - especially after 3 losses at 37. Got my bfp for this one a month before my birthday. As with everything, it's stats and averages etc but you are an individual with your own path and your own eggs etc. There is still every chance of success. I used to read the threads of '40+ and pregnant' when I was down to remind myself it wasn't all doom and gloom!

@SnookyPook your story is so encouraging 💕 I am so happy for you. I know I wonder ‘what if’ I stopped but then the next cycle would have worked out. I guess I’m also pretty afraid of actually being pregnant and having a baby, my first is 10 so the thought of going back to baby and toddler years is frightening. On the other hand I do want that too.

My life would just be so much easier if I had never got this thought of TTC into my head, but the last thing I want to do is not try and then regret it. The pain of loss is just so hard to bear. My husband is 9 years older than me so that plays on my mind in terms of age too. We don’t have much family support. So lots to weigh up, but for now I will keep doing what I can to be successful with TTC. The cycle I did conceive back in Nov I had started to feel hopeless… so maybe that’s the trick?! 😆

@CurlyWurly1991 you sound so much like me, I was giving us a few more months before stopping. I didn't want to live with any regrets but after 3 losses last year it all becomes too much. My DH is 9 years older than me too and like you I turn 38 this year. Literally the only thing I did different this cycle was use pre-seed, prior to that I'd taken 5 months to get pregnant so after that was a CP I expected it to take months again. I've also been more relaxed than ever, I think part of it was because in my mind I had already resigned myself to it not happening and yet here we are!

@CurlyWurly1991 I’m 38 and will be 39 in a few months. I know there are additional risks as an older mum and I can’t help but worry until I’ve had my initial scan and tests to check all is ok. I was starting to wonder if it would ever happen but here I am. I wouldn’t put any pressure or time limit on yourself

@RoseH36 @Fullofconfusion thank you for your encouraging words xxx I know amazing things are possible and there is every chance we will eventually be successful.

@RoseH36 @CurlyWurly1991 I'm 38 too, though started tc when just turned 37. Thought it would happen faster, and now have to accept that it may not happen at all, but have no plans to stop after a certain time limit.

I was worried about screening too but thankfully come back low risk for everything - certainly not a given that risk will be increased due to age. Hopefully yours will all be fine too 😊

Thank you. That’s encouraging to know.

I’ve just managed to move my booking appointment a week earlier as I’m worried I’m not 100% on my dates. So booking will be at 11 weeks and she said they can book an urgent scan if needed to make sure screening done in the best window so I’m breathing a small sigh of relief

Ohh I didn’t know wrist not that reliable for BBT! I didn’t get on so well with the mouth one! Was hoping this is better, I think it roughly shows trend at least! It’s werid as last month I had a lot of CM around when u thought was ovulating and this month, doesn’t seem like much at all. Might do another OPK tonight as I feeling like more CM today?

Oh sorry you’re feeling like that @CurlyWurly1991 - you’ve been pregnant recently so it should happen but maybe longer than we hope/plan for. You have a ready made babysitter with the 10yo! Have to say I have thought even with my nearly 2yo… can I go back to no sleep?! It nearly killed me before! But I am sure would be okay!

Keep your chin up… an extra month or two won’t make the risk change dramatically.

Hiya, I'm back on the ttc wagon. I had positive tests earlier this week but believe it was a chemical as they got fainter and I started bleeding today.

Can I join you all please? I'm 39 ttc #3 my first with my 2nd husband. This will be cycle #16 😭
All fertility tests normal. I have a HSG in a couple of weeks.

Of course @teampacey. Sorry about your chemical, it’s so disappointing but least you can get pregnant. Hope you have some luck soon x

CD3 here and feeling deflated and miserable that it hasn’t happened for us for yet another month…

Hope everyone has better luck than me!

@Bec0mum snap I am also CD3, we can be miserable together. Do you have a predicted ovulation day yet? Mine is the 4th or 5th.

CD4 here I’m also in the grumpy camp. No idea when ov will be as I’m not very regular. Going to try dropping the temping and OPKs this month and rely on CM to know when we should be ‘trying’. I’m sick of all the tracking and want some
normality back, I don’t know if it helps or actually makes me more stressed!

CD 4 here. Hycosy booked for 5th, OD should be around 4th. Actually glad we can't dtd before hycosy, I need a break from the tww. Think I will use OPKs just to track my cycle. Will be interesting to see if the hycosy shows that I have already ovulated or not. At least tracking my cycle will help give me a better picture of what's happening alongside the hycosy

@CoolSummer89 cycle twins! Predicted ovulation day on Premom is 5th but based on opks last month it would be more like the 9th. Ironically clue (just use as a basic period tracker) says 9th too so that may be more accurate…who knows! Do you temp or use opks?

@CurlyWurly1991 sorry to hear you’re also in the grumpy club! I used opks for the first time last month and found them quite stressful. I think I’m going to go back to just BD every 2-3 days throughout the month!

@jellyfish2210 the tww is horrible. I hate it! Sorry, I don’t know what a hycosy is? Hope it goes ok though!

CD14 here for me, trying to get myself in the mood as I usually ovulate Day 15 or 16 but just not feeling it!

Good to try and concieve from day 10 onwards so the sperm is there waiting 4 the egg

Hope u get lucky soon

CD12 here. AF only finished on fri 🙄 husband away since fri morn on a stag do, due home tonight so realistically be tomorrow night before we start. Hoping it works this cycle as next cycle we're doing the follicle tracking & trigger shot.

Can I ask, anyone that has taken a cycle ‘break’ for any reason, how do you reconcile it with your impatience and rush due to age?
I am having second thoughts about TTC (not for the first time, I keep changing my mind it seems!) and am considering avoiding dtd around ov this cycle.
I just worry about missing an opportunity as I have a hard deadline of my 38th birthday in my head.
maybe I don’t actually want another baby?! Argh it’s so hard.
I feel like the longer TTC takes / follow MMC the more importance is attached to it. If we had conceived first cycle I wouldn’t have had time to think it over so much!

@CurlyWurly1991 I only took one break for surgery, so didn't have to reconcile it, as I had no choice.

Why have you decided on a deadline of 38? I'm 38 now (started ttc when I'd just turned 37, didn't expect it to take this long).

Bloody hell @CurlyWurly1991 I could have written your post.

I too have a deadline of 38 in my head, that gives me until October this year to get pregnant. I worry that maybe I'm not that desperate if I'm prepared to give myself a deadline, but my thoughts are very practical around why I've set it at 38.

@CatCaretaker Hi, I set a year when I decided to TTC. There are a bunch of reasons but partly it is for my mental health, as I want to be able to make plans for the future that might not include another child (eg relocating once my currently aged 10 year old finishes school). My partner is also 9 years older and there is a deadline for me in terms of his retirement age and possible health issues as he gets older impacting on a younger child. I’m the main earner and there are financial reasons too.

@overthinkersanonnymus I think it’s totally fine not to be desperate … think how many babies are conceived unintentionally. It’s amazing that something that has such a profound impact on us and creates a new life in this world can be just on the flip of a coin, basically. I am trying to tell myself that either way would be fine - have a baby or don’t, either myself or Mother Nature will eventually make that decision. As we’ve thrown everything at it but had a MMC at 8 weeks and at least one CP along with all the cycles without conceiving … perhaps fate is making the decision for me anyway?

We planned a break because I'd just had my third loss in a row and my MH had taken a battering. Whilst I was anxious about missing a cycle and wasting time (particularly as my 38th birthday was literally a month away) I just couldn't face going through it all again and relished the thought of a month off to have a proper break from it all and enjoy Christmas. We were also waiting for a referral to fertility to come through and I decided I'd rather see the consultant before trying again in case they could suggest a simple tweak to make the next one stick. I felt a brief moment of 'sh!t, was this a mistake ' mid-cycle, then felt completely relieved and relaxed. No tracking or symptoms spotting of tww etc. And then of course got my surprise BFP.... 🙃 Was terrified at first, especially as was scared of ruining Christmas etc... but here we are... 16wks today.

If you need a break, have a break. May do you the world of good. And if the right baby is there, they will come regardless!! Sorry as I know that sounds a bit glib but I do think that now. I honestly don't know when I'd have felt ready mentally to face this again, and because it just happened, I've had to just get on with it and here we are. It's like this little one was determined despite my best efforts!!

Im on a break now - kinda consultant imposed as have to have another colonoscopy thats very important

Also took a break nov dec after some oct scans as they had to rule out me having liver cancer - thankfully i have a liver condition but not liver cancer

Im also an over thinker

We concieved at 36.75 but had early miscarriage

Im now 37..and will be 37.25 before we could try again