2024 TTC 35+ Part 1

[VixFromThe6ix]

New year, new thread!!!

Positive thoughts and baby dust for everyone this year!!!

Thank you @CurlyWurly1991!

I get absolutely what you mean about the mixed emotions and it’s completely understandable to be feeling them all. I think parents have the worry about existing children whatever their age- because it will be a huge change and because you are a good Mum. You love her and want the best for her. There will be huge disruption and speaking from a place of raising a pandemic baby 3 hours away from our closest family, it will be tough. But it will be doable and think too of all the positives this sibling will bring to your daughter’s life. You are expanding her family circle. X

@Bumblebee413 I am glad it looks like it was implantation bleeding after all.

@RoseH36 Congratulations. Hooe it's a sticky bean

@CurlyWurly1991 I am so sorry you had to go through all of that. It's a difficult decision to make. I think it's perfectly normal to have doubts. Maybe also a bit of fear of another liss playing into it?

@CatCaretaker Did you continue testing with tge LH series after your peak? Ovulation test strips only show that your body is gearing up to Ovulation not that it has actually occurred. Sometimes we can have an LH peal but the body fails to ovulate for obe reason or another. Then usually your body will try again a few days later. So that could explain the delay in your period.
If you want a better understanding if you did indeed ovulate you will need to temp and look out for a biphasic or triphasic pattern in your basal temperature

@Mrsspoon3 I am sorry the consultant was so clinical. I think they see so many sad things happen they grow a very cold skin. But I wish that some people in the clinical field had a better Bedside manner.

My AF is normally like clockwork and I know that it should start 14 days after my peak opk. I had one cycle last year where I was absolutely convinced it'd be a BFP as no AF by CD15... But test was negative. Not even a sniff of a line. AF eventually appeared on CD17, 3 days later than usual. No obvious reason. Never knew why. Perhaps as Fig&Honey mentioned I'd had a second peak that month for some reason, or some other random reason - maybe an early chemical that I was oblivious too as didn't test early? No idea but it really threw me! So, not much help but as you say, can be helpful just knowing it does happen to others.

@JC084 milestones are tough but your plans for celebrating your 40th sound fab and will hopefully be the start of a fantastic year and fantastic new decade! 💗

@CurlyWurly1991 that must be so hard wondering if the COVID caused your loss. It's all so random isn't it. I also sympathise with your thoughts since about is it actually the right path etc. After my recurring losses last year it did make me question if it was maybe just nature telling us to be glad for what we've got and not rock the boat etc. And then the month we were very much not trying, this pregnancy happened and I'm just trying to roll with it all and now that it's happening and seems to be progressing am realising how very much I do want it to work out still. It's so hard. But I think I'd take the positive from it if you can, that it's your own resilience telling you that you will be ok with however things work out. Whatever your story is, you will make it work. And you will have a wonderful life with your daughter. I'm telling myself similar whenever I have an anxious moment in the pregnancy. That we will make our path work for us, whatever twists and turns it takes. It's all we can do I guess. 💗

Thank you @FigandHoney@Bumblebee413@RoseH36 @SnookyPook

I’m totally confused about which path to take but have added folic acid back into my daily vitamin intake just in case….
If we hadn’t been so fortunate to fall pregnant very quickly with our daughter 10 years ago, I think the doubts would have crept in like they have now. We started TTC in May 23 and said we would give it a year. Still testing positive on a pregnancy test so either way it’ll be at least a couple of weeks before we need to decide whether to try next cycle. I’m having counselling but realise I just want her to tell me to go for it! Instead I feel like she’s encouraging me not to. Says a lot I guess!

I do get where you’re coming from @CurlyWurly1991 but I think as my LO is only 22 months I feel he would benefit from a sibling… but the first 12 months were so damn hard! I really didn’t get much sleep and had mastitis several times, we had hospital trips with little man. It was tough - things are good now. He sleeps like a dream most of the time and is just adorable, I do worry bringing another baby into the mix will be hard for us all to adjust to but he loves babies! He points to them on nappies packs and says bassabbyyy and if we are out he wants to see them! He loves nursery and other kids so I guess I feel I want him to have a sibling and also as we are older parents and he only has two cousins who live miles away I want him to have family when we are gone. I think as time goes on you get more independence back it might be hard to start again, I have a brother who is 16 years younger than me ! Same parents - he was an accident when my mum was 38 and was on the pill, I was horrified they still had sex 😂😂😂!! She had me and my other brother very young, I went to uni when baby bro was 2/3 so it’s werid we didn’t share a childhood and relatives I knew he didn’t as they had died etc, but he bought our whole family so much joy and I expect your DD would love a sibling and actually be quite helpful! It’s a tough decision.

I had a very faint positive in a one step yesterday afternoon, this morning it’s even bloody fainter, it’s like my wee is more concentrated in the PM! I clearly don’t drink enough. Am hopeful it will turn into something now - cause weirdly I did have feelings last night like I was pregnant. Was disappointed with this mornings tests but I have hope at least x

@FigandHoney no I didn't continue testing because I was using the clearblue smiley ovulation tests, I have the cheap sticks now so will use those next cycle and test for longer. I asked the doc if an LH peak can occur without ovulation amd she said no, but I did suspect that the ivture was more complicated than that, so will definitely investigate further myself now. Thank you! How long have you been ttc?

@SnookyPook thanks! How many weeks are you now? Congratulations?

@CatCaretaker thank you! Currently 11+1 so starting to feel a bit more real and hopeful, but the nerves are just starting to ramp up again now ahead of the 12wk scan. My last one was a week ago and looked good at 10wks so I'm more hopeful than I've been in a long time but that in itself is scary! Can't win!!

@SnookyPook I can imagine, the fear of allowing yourself to get excited! Do you think you'll be able to relax after the 12 week scan?

@Lalaland13 my DS is the same, he's always loved babies and being around other children so it would break my heart if I can't give him a sibling. He can find it hard at times socially, he's on the waiting list for an Autism assessment, so I feel if he had a sibling it could help him socially. My lines have been darker in the evenings so try again later.

Today marks 1 getting 1 day further than last time so I'm taking that as a win. Will test with a first response this evening. Still been using the cheapie ones but only did 1 yesterday rather than the 3 a day I'd been doing 😂

@SnookyPook that's great news. I don't think you ever fully relax but that's a great number of weeks to have reached so far so fingers crossed things will stay fine for you now.

Hey all

Lovely to see some ace updates

Drs tomorrow 4 me re some bad abdomen pain i had last week

Still awaiting the exact dates 4 gynae & 4 colonoscopy

Holding onto that we can hopefully try again from april

Have a great weekend all

@RoseH36 congrats on passing your previous pregnancy length. Those little milestones definitely feel good. Hopefully this one will settle in for the full duration!! And thank you! 🙏🏼🌈

@CatCaretaker I'm really not sure! It definitely feels like a big milestone and I know from an 'odds' perspective even the 10wk scan felt huge and I had a big burst of hope straight after... It's just that the longer any time passes with no updates/sightings of Babba, it's so hard to trust it's still developing as it should. I think that's the damage of the MMC. And I had hoped that being well past the gestation etc when it happened would make that easier. Which it has to some extent... But in other regards, not. So, I think probably there will be anxious days throughout. Hopefully once a bump becomes clear and then movement etc it will feel more and more real..!

@worldwidetravel2017 hope you get your answers soon and that you're in a position for TTC again in April. I know how much you've been working up to that so it will be great to get some closure on your health issues and be able to come at it fresh and rearing to go!

@worldwidetravel2017 I am sorry you have been experiencing pain. Fingers crossed you get the all clear to ttc from April

@CatCaretaker I am currently pregnant with my second just popping back in to check on people who were ttc whilst I was here.
We tried for 1 and half years with our furst. Only took 3 cycles with my current pregnancy.
I am not sure why your GP told you that. It is a very common known fact and obe of the symptoms for people with PCOS. They often have several LH surges in a cycle.
But it can also happen just as an odd cycle for people without PCOS. Had it happen myself. And I was temping so confirmed ovulation.
And you will find loads of testimonies of other women who had a second LH surge.
Mind you your LH also rises again towards your period and if you get a positive LH test right before your period could mean your pregnant.
I was confused about the cycle I fell pregnant and tested all the way yo getting a BFP

@FigandHoney thanks, I'm going to keep more on top of the LH this time for sure. I've never measured BBT, but might try this month too. Congrats on your pregnancy 😊.

@SnookyPook it must be so hard after the MMC, but yes, as you say, the more time that passes the better you'll feel no doubt. Hope you can keep yourself distracted until then.

@worldwidetravel2017 hope Doctors appointment tomorrow sheds some light on what's going on. What do you think was causing the pain?

@CurlyWurly1991 I am sorry you are feeling so confused right now but think it's really normal after what just happened to you.
Only you and your other half can decide what you want to do.
In my case I wasn't sure for a long time after a traumatic birth. Which is why my son is now 3 and a half.
But we always wanted a second. And my dad died the year my son was born. And it made me realise how glad I was to have a sister. So a bit like @Lalaland13 said I want my son to have a sibling for when we pass. As morbid as that sounds. And I think he will be a brilliant brother.
But still I have doubts. Even now that I am pregnant. I am worried about money. I am worried we are taking on too much. I know it's not a picnic, especially in the early years. And I am terrified of giving birth.

Thank you
I dont know - could of been linked to my liver condition or linked to my gallstones or maybe even linked To appendix.. i dunno
Science is not my forte

@FigandHoney so sorry to hear about your dad. I've had the same thoughts as you too. My dad is an only child as my nan couldn't have any more so they never wanted me to be an only child. It must have been hard on him once my nan passed as he was having to deal with everything by himself. I'd hate to feel I've put DS in that position if I don't have to.

@SnookyPook thank you, it really does feel like a good milestone to pass. I've just done a One Step test and thats the darkest line I've had to date.

Thanks muchly @SnookyPook
Hope your all good

@FigandHoney I’m sorry to hear you lost your dad… I have lost quite a few family members too. It makes me want to have another at the same time makes me hesitant in case I don’t survive into my children’s adulthood. As my daughter was born when I was 27 I feel happy now she is 10 and I am still relatively young. I think losing a parent early affects your sense of safety in the world. While I worry about those things I am also very grateful for my siblings, even though we don’t live nearby we are close and speak a lot. I have actually always wanted another child I have just been working and retraining and moving and etc etc and it just slipped.

So altogether I am veering towards going ahead with TTC again and will need to talk with DH!!
will try not to do bbt this time as I got a tad obsessive. Think I will just take the Vitex to support progesterone and a regular cycle, watch for EWCM and do OPKs. Give me a month and I’ll be back temping 😆 but will avoid if I possibly can.

on a practical note - holidays? I booked a holiday for the summer and flights seperately, straight after the MMC and convinced we would stop TTC. What are people thinking about holidays - go ahead and book, travel insurance, ???

@CurlyWurly1991 I’ve booked a summer holiday. I don’t want to put things off as at the moment I’m not pregnant and this may not change anytime soon. I think if I was booking for later on in the year I’d book a package as they’re easier to move or cancel with minimal problems. I’ve booked for May bank hols so even if I fell pregnant this cycle I think I’d feel fine going.

I'm so behind on the thread but just wanted to give a little update....confirmation I needed to relax a bit. Can't quite believe it! Thank you everyone for the support in the tww, it helped so much!

@Hannah156 aw amazing! No doubting those words is there?! Amazing news! And you were so convinced you were out. Just goes to show!

@Lalaland13 are you doing an evening test? Hope it comes up stronger again for you 🤞🏻

@Fullofconfusion how are you doing? Think AF was due around now..? Xx

Thanks so much for the nice messages the other day! Yeah it was really upsetting how the surgeon was. I would probably put in a complaint but at the moment I just feel like I can’t be bothered to do anything really. I’m finding things really hard. As I was supposed to be 13 weeks pregnant and had had a good scan at 7 weeks I felt like the baby was actually coming and I had planned so much down to the small details of where my baby and toddler would sleep, and when I would go on maternity leave, and how I would transport them around (as my toddler won’t use a buggy) and even the baby and toddler groups I would take them both too, and now it’s all over and I’m struggling to really process that.

Im thinking about going to my GP to see if I can get a referral to a recurrent miscarriage clinic as this is my 4th loss, but I don’t know if they’ll refer me as a) The other 3 were chemical pregnancies so very early on, b) There’s nothing on my medical record to say I experienced these pregnancies or losses, and c) I had a full term pregnancy in the middle of the 4. But I thought I would ask.

Glad everything seems to have settled for you @Bumblebee413 😊 And congratulations @Hannah156!

No holidays booked as yet - ohh actually we do have a mon- fri in wales at bluestone in November… already moved that once! Eeek! Was thinking somewhere in June maybe- hubby is a farmer so it’s a bit tricky to plan too far in advance in the summer.

Did a sains test this PM but it’s 25 mui… showed maybe a verrry faint line but after the time period. The one step are 10 mui…. Is it mui?!

Did another one step this PM too but it’s again very faint and maybe fainter than yesterday and this morning but I prob did drink more today… I am feeling relatively calm and trying to be patient, how long do they usually take to go from v faint to more visible? I guess it could be a chemical. Who knows. I am just happy to see something on a stick as it’s been so demoralising seeing absolutely nothing! I think with my son it took a few days to get darker.