2023 TTC 35+ Part 3

[VixFromThe6ix]

New thread!!!

The other one filled in so quickly. I'm happy that many of you are finding this space supportive and helpful.

@VixFromThe6ix thank you and you're right, the fact I'm getting pregnant is something to focus on as that's half the battle. My DH always reminds me I've got though it once so we know I can have a baby, it's just getting it to stick again. Honestly didn't think it would be harder second time around. That's amazing to hear you think that's what helped you, really hope I can have the same outcome if I can have it.

Sorry to hear you're having to pause things but a break may do you good, it becomes so consuming doesn't it? The countdown to ovulation, the tww, the wondering am I or aren't I? You try not to think about it but impossible not to. After my mmc we did have 1 month of not trying when I was ill and it was actually nice to have that breathing space.

Thanks, ladies. I guess I'm kind of looking forward to not tracking. It becomes a centre of your life lol I'm just hoping next blood test we do shows better results.

Sending everyone positivity 💕

Hi everyone, apologies I didn't check in for a few days and then there were over 100 posts to read! Wanted to read them all before replying...

@RoseH36 so very sorry to hear your updates. I hope you're doing as ok as can be. Admirable that you are taking the positives from this. I really hope they can give you some answers soon. I'm pretty sure I've read somewhere that a loss of a twin definitely counts as a miscarriage in its own right so hopefully they will accept that for their threshold of conducting further checks. Sending you a massive big hug.

@Eirlys1986 so glad these ladies have been rallying round to get you through these tough days. Sending a big hug your way too.

Apologies I can't remember everything else to respond to, except I think @Un7breakable has had a BFP?! Congratulations and hope all goes well for you.

Just entered fertile week here but Hubby has several 12hr shifts and we have a toddler off nursery with a sick bug so not sure it's looking overly hopeful!!

Thanks @SnookyPook and God speed and the best of luck for your fertile week with all those other things going on for you. You can do it! 💪

Thanks @SnookyPook just booked a private 8 week scan and told my parents. Starting to sink in.

@VixFromThe6ix I'm really sorry. Hopefully your partner gets good hormone results at his next test 🤞 what unnecessary stress to add to this process. Hope you're okay.

It sucks missing a month or two. Hopefully you can have a brilliant summer without the stress of tracking and SMEP sex and watching what you drink or consume the week before testing etc. A couple of my friends (also around our age and with a history of miscarriage) are giving themselves one fun summer before (hopefully) number two. Love to you x

@SnookyPook thank you, got an appointment at the end of the month so will keep you all posted. Hope your toddler is better soon and you can fit in time to DTD.

Hey all 👋, I’m feeling very sad and struggling a bit this morning so decided I’d post on here. Things are still physically yuck, since the misoprostol on Friday the bleeding and cramps have been ongoing. I really thought before bed last night things were finally going to come to a head as was having contractions before bed but then fell asleep and woke in the morning no further along. Now have got ongoing pain and bleeding but it’s definitely not at the point it needs to be for me to be assured things have “worked”. Feel really annoyed with my body today for not even being able to do this “right”, hormones are crazy up and down at present and the emotions are just exhausting although I’m trying my best to work through them. I’m going to EPAU tomorrow at 8:40 for a rescan and think I’ll have another dose of the misoprostol then- just feels like a punishment to my body with all this stuff 😞
To top it all I decided to do some work this morning and on going through emails ended up having to respond to and finalise details for a colleagues maternity leave. I will have two colleagues at work pregnant, one is only a few weeks ahead of me and the other current 22 weeks. I know their pregnancies aren’t anything to do with mine, their pregnancies don’t affect my future chances etc but it all just feels so unfair and cruel today.

On a lighter note, in other news, the person who stuck this to my windscreen when I went for a long walk yesterday (to try to encourage contractions to get stronger ) has no idea how close they came to losing their balls had I seen them doing it 😆

Oh @Eirlys1986 I’m so sorry for everything u are going through, it really is so so cruel. I know I just felt so sad for myself a few different days in the weeks afterwards and like u I had colleagues announce their pregnancies that were very similar timings to mine, I found it so hard❤️ Sending so much love to u. I know ppl say this all the time but I promise u it does get easier with time. I know I just wanted to fast forward those weeks after it. Really hoping ur scan tomorr goes ok and u never know u may be over the worst of it🤞🏽 Sending hugs 🥰 xx

@Eirlys1986 awww you poor thing. That sounds horrible.
It is always an awful situation to be in, especially when everyone around you seems to be pregnant/finding it easy.
To make you feel more normal, I have included the ridiculous things that happened to me...
The day after miscarrying (Saturday) I had a private scan booked who kept calling me. I finally answered and cried a lot. So the upside was I got my non redundable deposit back!
On the Monday, my TfL badge arrived, my husband said there's some very important post for you (not realising!), so he quickly had to hide that out the way.
For me, the next kick was one of my husband's blended family relatives giving birth on our twelve week scan date (she's always been horrible to me and rude about us not having children!) taking the really unusual name we had picked (several years before) but she spelt it incorrectly! So now I am stuck writing cards with the name we always wanted spelled wrong...
After trying for a few more months, we then finally get my husband's sperm checked after being told my by gynae not to bother as it will be fine, but he has "too few to count"...
Now I can laugh about it, but each of those things were like a sucker punch.
My husband always says there aren't a finite amount of babies so don't worry about other people (but that is super hard!) and yes it is cruel and unfair but you will get through it and get your rainbow. ❤️

y husvabd

@DmcinT thanks so much, I definitely know I will feel better and you are correct I just want to fast forward to that point and feel like myself again and be able to plan and look forwards. Just such a horrid limbo at present. I just feel convinced they will tell me nothing has passed at the scan but I am obviously in quite a negative mindset at present and not very trusting of my body x

I have no idea where "y husvabd" is there but take it as the free range unicorns wishing you well xx

@TheFanciestPants 😂 🦄 thanks so much! I’m sorry all those horrible things happened to you after your MC, so far I have had the pregnant colleagues as described and the lovely “congratulations on your pregnancy!” Booking midwife letter on morning of going to EPAU. Myself and partner also had a great laugh on day of me placing misoprostol up foof and lying down as instructed for 45 minutes…switched Netflix on to keep me occupied and it handily provided me with a suggested movie I might like to watch- “There will be blood” 😆

@Eirlys1986 Sorry you're having such a bad time of it. Hopefully the scan shows you're over the worse.

@Eirlys1986 oh bless you... You are definitely allowed to be feeling crappy at the moment. The days when the physical side of the loss is ongoing are just the worst, because they stick you in limbo when you know the worst has already happened but you can't start moving forwards from it. However, it will end. Hopefully very soon. Hope the scan tomorrow goes ok for you and provides reassurance that everything is happening as it needs to. You may be further along with it than you think, and of course more might happen this aft/overnight before you go in.

My crappy things to join in were:

• receiving the invitation letter for my birth review that I had booked to discuss my previous experience.
• a friend who I hadn't spoken to in ages randomly sending a "guess what?!" With a scan photo.... Her due date is the exact same as mine was before the loss 😌
• my Sister's bf excitedly announcing she's due with a due date two weeks before mine.

The Universe sure likes to knock us when we're down doesn't it?!

That suggested movie is hilarious - glad you were able to see the funny side!

Thanks @Un7breakable 😊
Oh @SnookyPook those due date coincidences are crappy crap crap 💩! I really hope as you and @Un7breakable say, that I am further along than I anticipate when I go for the scan. Awful as this is to say, I think I will feel much lighter if I am but I’m sure there will be a whole new box of emotions to open when this is all physically over but I shall cross that bridge when I come to it.
Everyone here is so wonderful and I value every one of you so so much for the support you have given. Including sharing your own crapballs from the universe x

@Eirlys1986 so sorry to hear what you are going through. Sending you strength to get through it all xx

Thanks @CurlyWurly1991 xxx

Hi 👋 may I join?
I might be too old though at 41 🙈

So much support in this group!! I am currently going through the 4th chemical since last year...have this cycle before starting my first IVF in august...

Really sorry to read some sad stories and pain you are going through! ❤️

And congrats to all the positive ones!!

Hi@TT82 ,welcome and hello 👋 41 is not too old! (My mummy fell pregnant with me at 42 and I was her only baby!)
Im so sorry about your chemical and the amount of times this has happened to you. It is a hard journey, everyone on here is so supportive (as you have seen for me today I imagine). It is so nice to be with others who understand.

@TT82 welcome and definitely not too old to join us 😊 Sorry to hear of your struggles. How are you feeling about starting ivf? I think there are a couple of others on that journey here so hopefully some people you can share the ups and downs with who will really get where you're at. Whereabouts in your current cycle are you? There's a thread in here of someone who has got their BFP on their last cycle before IVF after 2 years of trying so you never know what might happen! 🤞🏻

@SnookyPook , @Eirlys1986 thank you!!

Oh...I read probably too much stories on MN 🙈 Now I am terrified that either no embyros, or none good after testing, or they won't stick.. I know I need to try and see as we all respond differently..
Yeah I was hoping this one is a miracle before IVF one... not so 😔 I am day 1 of my cycle, but as hormones went down head is clear and ready for this cycle!

None of my friends or family know or suspect we are ttc, they would not understand or support at my age... But we always wanted 3 kids, so here we are 😊

@Eirlys1986 im sorry you’re having such a shitter of a day. Why the universe had to serve you those emails today, I’ve no idea. I really hope your scan tomorrow shows you’ve passed more than you thought. I know our bodies do seem to want to cling on to these things when we just want it over and done with asap. Fml at that flyer, some people have too much time on their hands! I hope you found something more distracting than there will be blood! Sending you all the love and unicorn hugs. Thanks @TheFanciestPants for bringing the unicorn back to the thread! 🦄 💗

Thanks @Muriel84 that unicorn is working overtime at the moment on this thread 😂. I really wanted to send a “thank you” letter back to the parking knobber but decided the universe would deal with that one for me 😊. How are you doing at the moment? No more bleeding I hope? Xx
@TT82 You must never feel that the yearning another child is not valid based on your age or how many children you have already. When you have decided it is what you want for yourself and your family it is such a strong urge and you will do anything to achieve it so go you! 💪 xxx