The geriatric gang 👵🏻🤰

[Stillwinston]

Just a lighthearted thread for those of us now considered to be geriatric by the NHS 😂 looking to meet other women TTC who may also be feeling past their prime!

A little bit about me - I'm 36 and TTC dc no.2. Been trying for over 2 years now and depressingly started AF today so am yet again starting CD1. Hubby doesn't quite understand how upsetting this is each month so it'd be great to chat with ladies who get how I'm feeling ❤️

I'm out 😭 AF arrived 4 days early - onto cycle 25 👎🏻 this TTC malarkey is a killer emotionally

@Stillwinston Sorry to hear AF has arrived. Look after yourself today and know you’re not alone in this shit journey we’re on. 💐

@Stillwinston sorry Af arrived it’s always crap when it does. Treat yourself to something nice. Wishing you lots of luck for the next cycle

Has anyone given up caffeine ? I did for months and I’m back on it now . I missed my morning coffee. Just sick of it now.

@Irishgirl2015 hope your appointment comes through soon. @MK85 AF has been heavy for me both times it's been a short cycle and the pain both times too! Wow, I have been so lucky not to have had that all my life and it's made me feel for anyone that has! It's been like someone has been bashing my ovaries with a baseball bat for 3 days 😣 @Stillwinston sorry AF came for you too, another early one! It's just shitter than shit! You must feel so disappointed because you made such a good effort with DTD! Kind of makes me think, how? How did this not work this time?? It also makes you question everything, like WTF can we do different/try next!! (Definitely more sex for me, DH better get ready!!) So so frustrating for us all. Lots of virtual hugs to all that need them today 💐🫶🏻

@Stillwinston sorry AF came, it never gets easier. Treat yourself to something lovely and keep the hope for the next cycle.

@cornflakes86 I cut back on caffeine a bit, as I had stopped when I got pregnant 3 years ago and then when I miscarried, I just never went back to as much as I was having. I haven’t cut it out completely though. Like you said, I got sick of cutting out all the things I enjoyed. Thankful I didn’t or I’d be 3 years down without any of them.

I was feeling a bit hopeful. Despite my erratic temps, everything felt like I had ovulated and I thought maybe this was it. My temp flew up a couple of nights ago but back down again (although my poor attempt at bbt is showing the opposite?) and I tested this morning at 9dpo and it couldn’t be more negative. I took my progesterone test and popped it back in the post today, so I can know for sure if I did ovulate. If I did, I’ll worry less about the temps next cycle

@Infinitebows i know that feeling and its awful. I've had a little cry to OH most days cause I'm feeling like my ovaries are being wrung out. Last cycle, I had what felt like bad period pain the entire month. There was just no end to it. I've still never figured what causes the pain. I don't know if it's hormones or what. I feel like im not shedding my lining properly. I was supposed to be having a laparoscopy and they were going to check for any endometriosis . I had some questions regarding it and the anesthetic nurse referred me back to the gynae and he sent a letter and said I should proceed ( still never got my questions answered ) but another other says I'm not having it .. so .. 🤷‍♀️that was month ago so I've no idea if it's happening or not.
I started doing castor oil massages this month to help increase blood flow and reduce immflamation. Getting good blood flow to the pelvic region is vital for pelvic health and increasing conception . I've been concerned that my thin lining may be due to the clomid , as it was never mentioned before and apparently clomid does thin the uterine lining. I've noticed since using the castor oil that my cycle has been alot less painful this time, so I don't know if the castor oil is helping or just a coincidence but it's definitely much less painful anyway so im going to continue with it for a few months and see. I also did castor massages the month I conceived so I definitely don't think they do any harm

@cornflakes86 we've completely given up caffeine. He's not a coffee drinker but we used to drink alot of caffinated tea. Tea solves every problem in this house. We've since switched to decaf and thankfully can't taste a difference. I read that caffeine is really bad for sperm quality. We certainly don't need any extra stress on his sperm. It's shit enough as it is

@MK85 Everywhere you look on the internet, someone says something different 😂As long as you don't overdo it with the caffeine, it's harmless to sperm, there's even a study claiming that caffeine can have help with sperm motility, ie it energises them. However, it is bad for women in large amounts, but harmless in small amounts. You can drink caffeinated beverages, just don't go chugging an energy drink.

@Maizie83 you don't need to avoid baths completely but I'd make sure it's not too hot to overheat your core temperature. I don't know if there's any evidence behind hot baths but I will say it's something that's always been on my mind . I had a very hot bath the night before I had my loss and shortly after emerging from the water I'd taken cramps. The following day is when I started to bleed. I only discovered I had been pregnant the day that I was bleeding as I'd done a test as it just didnt feel right and I had a inkling in my mind that I was . I'd got as far as 3 weeks past ovulation. I had never seen any advice and still haven't regarding baths. All info seems to suggest baths are safe , just to avoid saunas and hot tubs but I don't know, I will be avoiding them after ovulation in future just incase. I don't usually take baths, just now and again.

@SarahShorty very true. One thing will tell you it's awful for sperm or eggs while another will tell you it's a superfood for them. I'm quite sensitive to caffeine tho so I think cutting it out has been good for me. 2 cups of normal tea and I'd feel giddy ☺️

@Stillwinston oh no 😢 sending you lots of love

@MK85 I agree with avoiding caffeine. I drink decaf all the time, though my DH drinks caffeinated.

For the hot bath thing; one of the reasons behind avoiding them is because when you submerge any part of your body in hot water, your body reacts by increasing blood circulation to the surface of your skin on that part of your body to try to cool it down, which then turns that part of your body pink/red, thus drawing it away from your uterus and hence depriving blood supply to the growing embryo.

OH rang the surgery and hes finally managed to get me booked in for bloods tomorrow. However, tomorrow is only 5dpo. Isn't that too early to tell if I've ovulated or not ?

@MK85 I'm pleased you have a supportive OH to comfort you through these super difficult times. I'm pleased you've managed to get an appointment for bloods tomorrow too, I doubt it'll be too early but either way I feel you have to go with the luck you've had recently.
I feel similar with the lining shedding, since my last MC very early February things just feel different, I can't explain it but it's definitely different- the pain and cycle length is all very bizarre. After the MC I had in June things sprang back to normal straight away and I was further along in that pregnancy too so can't weigh it up. I've not heard of the castor oil massages so will look them up.
Another one here that will avoid hot baths, I'm no expert but given my past experience, I'm sure there's something in it that they're not great post ovulation/early pregnancy and shan't risk it again.

@Infinitebows I guess every loss isn't going to be textbook and will be different for everyone. Perhaps your hormones this time haven't settled out right. I'd try and get a blood test from the gp if I was you and inform them you've been having alot of pain.
I've found it very much depends on the doctor. Some are helpful and some are utterly useless and don't give a damn.
I've had two very funny periods since my loss and I'm going to bring it up with fertility next month

Regarding the castor oil , I use it once or twice a week , don't over do it. Alot of people place a hot towel or water bottle over the pelvis. I personally don't put the heat directly on me as ive heard conflicting information about using water bottles directly on your stomach. In chinese medicine ( the chinese herbalist who told me about castor oil ) said it warms the uterus and increases implantation as a cold uterus will affect getting pregnant. However after researching this , I found that indeed there seems to be alot of information on the hot castor packs but then i read using heat can affect oocyte quality. Like Sarahshorty said , theres always different information. I usually get oh to massage it in while I relax and leave it there , then I'll blast some very low heat from the hair dryer just for a few seconds. You can only use it upto ovulation. Its not recommended to use it after ovulation

I wonder should I try and get it rescheduled for Monday then I had my positive ovulation tests on Saturday night at midnight / all day Sunday so tomorrow is only 5 days from that. I don't know if that will give me an accurate reading since they told me if at 7dpo my progesterone is below 30 to increase the clomid dose. I don't want to increase it and risk getting OHSS just because my blood test wasn't done on right day .

Really sorry to hear this @Stillwinston. I thought AF had got me this morning too but it hasn’t properly started yet - had period pain all day though so I’m expecting mine to start tomorrow (3 days early).

Hope you’re doing okay - you’re right, TTC is such a mental rollercoaster xx

Thanks everyone, all of your lovely messages have made me feel so much better - onwards and upwards for the next cycle 💪🏻 sending love to everyone ❤️

Glad to hear you’re feeling a bit better @Stillwinston - the power of this wonderful group ❤️

@Stillwinston i’m so sorry to hear this. You’ve been incredible to each and every person on this group with your support. You deserve all the good things, and I hope you can celebrate your BFP with us here soon.

@Maizie83 your message just made me cry 😭 thank you so much, I'm just so grateful that this group has formed with so many strong and inspiring women who understand the struggle 💕 I'm certain we'll start to see some BFP announcements soon x

I echo what @Downtherabbithole83 and @Maizie83 said! Amazing group, despite our struggles the ongoing support and sounding board is fantastic! We got this ladies 🥰

Can we all just go for a virtual drink down the pub now please and get a bit pissed?

@ttcat37 definitely up for that, I'll get the first round in 😂