Anyone else TTC after TFMR?

[Downtherabbithole83]

Anyone else on here in the same situation? Would be nice to chat to others who understand.

@Lunamoon2022 I’n so pleased your bereavement midwife was available. I hope you are able to relax a little x

Feeling very low today as I got my period. I really convinced myself I was pregnant thinking the same early indicators were there as last time. I haven't had these feelings the other months of ttc so it feels like a real blow.

I also added my period to my period tracking app and have realised my next period is due to start on the day my daughter was due to be born which feels unreasonably harsh. Maybe we shouldn't even try to conceive for that cycle just so I know for sure I will be having my period that day and can be prepared rather than risk crushing disappointment on that day of all days. However, due to my age I don't think I can really allow for a break.

Sorry to be feeling sorry for myself today, I am glad I can vent on this board.

My period started yesterday and I knew I was out this cycle, but I am still feeling rough today. I have also found that since my TFMR my periods have been heavier and less regular so i'm just shattered today with it all.

Completely understand your feelings @WarriorsComeOutToPlayaaay. Hoping tomorrow seems a bit better x

thanks @herewegoagaiin and I'm sorry you are going through the same. I hope you feel less shattered soon and wish you all the best.

My period also started today. I had so many symptoms that I thought might be pregnant and then my period was two days late. Feels even more cruel. Sorry you are both in the same boat x

@whippeywhippet sorry to hear that, and being two days late seems extra cruel. I hope you are ok x

Never any need to apologise on here @WarriorsComeOutToPlayaaay - it’s the precise reason I set this thread up: a group of us who genuinely understand! Vent away!

Sorry to hear you’ve also had AF arrive @whippeywhippet and @herewegoagaiin. I’m 4dpo and we’ve tried SMEP this month: I can honestly say it’s been the least enjoyable month of ttc since the tfmr. It became a chore and a process. We won’t be doing it this way again!

Hi everyone, new here and have read so many of your posts on this thread before and now after my TFMR at 14 weeks on 19/05 - first pregnancy. Sad to be here but so grateful to you incredible people for sharing your experiences. I'm so sorry to you all for your losses.

Apologies if this has already been asked, but did anyone experience really strong ovulation pain during their first cycle after TFMR? I'm 2.5 weeks after and I'd never particularly noticed ovulating before my pregnancy - feels very achey / bruised around my ovaries, rather than sharp pain, and lower back pain on the left too. I'm assuming it's ovulation as I don't have any other symptoms of anything more sinister.. but if anyone had an complications that sound similar I'd also be keen to hear!

I'm desperate to ttc this month. Is it too soon? I feel fine physically, no pain during sex etc. but maybe the above is a sign to wait? Or maybe I should take advantage - could I be hyper ovulating?! Wishful thinking I'm sure!

Thanks so much in advance x

@Thornberry1 Sorry for your loss. 💐 I totally had a crazy ovulation after my tfmr. I remember walking to the shops and every step was so painful, like this weird vibrating pain. I have had rather bad ovulation pain ever since, but I think it's probably my age as I became pregnant after the tfmr and had the coil for a few years after DC was born, and since the coil has been out I have suffered from the same ovulation pain. It's quite uncomfortable but only lasts a day or so and isn't generally worrying. At least I know when I'm ovulating!

I got pregnant the cycle after my tfmr and all went well. I think if you're ready then go for it, unless your doctor has advised otherwise. I wasn't sure about TTC immediately after but figured that if my womb lining etc wasn't ready I probably wouldn't fall pregnant that cycle anyway so just went for it. Good luck!

@AlwaysWorriedAboutEverything Thanks so much for your reply! That's exactly what it feels like, so it's really reassuring to hear you've felt similar. And agreed - at least I know when it's happening - kind of worth it for a bit of pain..!

Also really reassuring that you got pregnant so soon after your tfmr - I feel similar in that if my body isn't ready then it wont happen. I'm so pleased that everything went well for you.

Thanks again x

Anyone had a TFMR due to maternal health? I feel like TFMR is rare but I also feel quite alone as most tend to be with the baby.

I also died and I feel like TTC is a bit different in this situation

*almost died (I’m not a ghost) 😂

@Hotsweatymomspagetti oh I am so sorry to read this 😔 ours was our baby was very poorly and we had a TFMR at 25 weeks. I do have a friend who had to have a TFMR as she got sepsis. All of it is so sad, but I really feel for you. When did you have your TFMR?

Oh bless you, this made me laugh😂

Hey can I please join? I had a tfmr at 21 weeks 3.5 weeks ago. I bled for about 2 weeks then had a few days of lots of Ewcm but didn’t pick up a positive LH test. I’ve had a bit of light blood tonight so I think maybe im going to get my period? Anyone else have a period so soon after? Feel so sad about the probably long road ahead. My first pregnancy was a mmc then it took 7 months to conceive. I had a healthy baby (very lucky im aware), then a chemical when I was 5months pp and wasn’t trying and then the tfmr at 21 weeks. So I feel like pregnancy and trying is such a chore just constant disappointment and heartache. That 7 months to conceive my living child were soul destroying and here I am right back at the beginning again. Oh with a husband who works away so if this is my period then my ovulation will be before he’s home so that’s another month wasted. Great.

@justwantobeamum so sorry to hear of your losses. I had my period return exactly 3.5weeks after giving birth to my daughter at 25weeks, so it sounds very much like it could be your period. It did last for 9 days though and usually my periods are only 3/4 days long x

@whippeywhippet it was last year and we have had appointments with the doctors. They can’t guarantee it won’t happen again so it’s a roll of the dice. I don’t know what’s worse going through another TFMR or never having another baby. The risk i could live my DC without a mother scares me so much.

I get so angry that other people seem to have normal pregnancies and as many as they want. The jealously at times is unreal.

@justwantobeamum it sucks it really does, I’m so sorry for your loss. Hopefully it’s your period and your body is back into a proper cycle, the worse would be a cycle that takes ages to come back so you never know what’s going on. Sending you a massive hug from the group none of us ever wanted to be part of.

@Hotsweatymomspagetti oh I am so with you on the jealousy. I don't have any living children so I am jealous of anyone and everyone. Two friends are currently pregnant and I want to scream, 'I'm supposed to have my baby before you!' 😔😭 it's an ugly feeling. I am happy for them too, but my whole self is angry, angry at what they have, angry at what I lost, angry at the unfairness of it all and so so sad that I lost my little girl.

I feel you all with the jealousy and anger. I also don't have any living children and feel very aware that time is running out.
I saw a friend last week who announced that she was 16 weeks pregnant (I was 16 weeks when I had my tfmr) she was so happy and threw up her top to show me her maternity jeans and bump. I felt all the blood rush to my head and felt frozen. It was awful 😥 I am happy for her but it cut so deep.
I also reloaded my flo app today and it opened up saying 'what to expect in week 27 of your pregnancy' eurghhh, it's all just too much and I am feeling very sorry for myself.

I really feel you and am sorry this happened. I got midwife appointment letters after I know that I had to terminate and found it like a punch on the face. I don't have anything helpful.to.offer, just to say I understand.

I hope everyone is doing ok. Today was my due date. Instead I’ve got my period. Life can be very cruel.

im so sorry ladies for your pain! It’s a club none of us wanted to be part of.

@onelostsoulswimminginafishbowl that completely sucks I hope your friend didn’t know. If she did know she’s a crappy friend.

@EMcG3 i had the midwife call me after mine and I cried. I was crying out for help but didn’t get any from them. It felt like a punch to the gut that she seemed to care more afterwards.

@WarriorsComeOutToPlayaaay ahhh what a shitty world we live in at times. I hope you can do something nice for yourself today.

Sending you all a massive hug, I know nothing helps take the pain away but it is comforting knowing I’m not alone

Hi all, I wondered if I could also join this group.
I'm 15 weeks pregnant and having a TFMR on Saturday. I'm going in today for a meeting with the midwife and consultant and to take the first pill. I'm so sad, scared, broken. My little girl has T21 and extensive fetal hydrops making her not compatible with life. It took us 2 years to get here and I'm absolutely devastated. Reading all your stories on here has given me hope. Sending love to you all xx

@oneweecraw So so sorry to hear. Really feel for you - the few days before really are horrible. My situation was quite similar - T21 and heart defect, TFMR at 14 weeks. I'm 5 weeks post-TFMR now and although its still hard, I did actually feel a bit better after the procedure. Seems strange to say, and although I was (and still am) absolutely devastated, it felt like a bit of closure after 2/3 weeks of hell.

Keep that hope! So many people go on to have healthy babies after this. I keep trying to remember that :) Sending you so much love for Saturday xx