TTC after miscarriage thread 13 💕🌈✨💛

[FfayeN]

Ready for when we tip over the last one. Lucky 13 🍀

@mummatara really🤣🤣 why are they so thick sometimes, it actually amazes me🤦🏻‍♀️ oh there’s no way I’d be able to keep it to myself, surely you’d slip a he or she out in conversation every now and then! At least you won’t be panicking if it doesn’t happen this month, sure you’ll be back to normal by next! It would be a lovely surprise, I’ll be crying about it next weekend either way! The pains gone now, it’s a really weird one it’s just a shooting pain like up inside, it might not even be related at all could be a coincidence!

@ChloeN I know bless him he only got to come to one because of lockdown so we had an extra couple of private ones. I don't know why we did really because even at our 4d at 26 weeks he couldn't tell what was what 🤦🏼‍♀️ haha I think everyone would have been onto me since I was so adamant he was a girl a switcharoo would have def given it away 😆 oooh weird I've never had that before let's hope it's something I'm keeping everything crossed for you 🤞🏼

@Margo34 I'm sorry you are feeling this way. For me I grieved a lot with the first miscarriage (I couldn't eat, couldn't see joy in anything and it passed very slowly) the second one I didn't cry as much. It's that first baby, the baby I have a scan of that I want. But I can't have it. I don't know if this is a normal feeling. Like others said your mind is trying to protect itself. I don't think it's because it DC2. In my opinion and believe me I'm no expert it's the grief of the EDD. And the hormones. I hope you feel better soon and feel free to talk here. Miscarriage is hugely traumatic xx

Thank you all for your input re the book. I think I’ll try to make some changes if they’re easy enough but also don’t want to obsess over what pans I’m using etc.

Feeling quite negative today, been having these intrusive thoughts that maybe it will never happen for us now ☹️

@HJA87 the author did another version and she said not to get obsessed about products etc but just me mindful of how much your exposed to. For example if you work in a shop, you may want to consider how you handle receipts due to how they are coated. I never binned my pans - I was close though!

@HJA87 @bunnykins123 I wouldn't worry about receipts I work in the industry and they are all bpa free now and have been for a few years. I def haven't changed any pots or pans those things are expensive 😂

Happy Monday all!
I've got my scan tomorrow (I'm 7+3 today) and scanxiety has hit. My boobs still haven't popped nor are they tender and it's making me so worried. With both my previous pregnancies it was my earliest and strongest symptom. Also tiredness and nausea are totally manageable so I'm worrying myself sick that something's wrong. That's on top of all the bleeding I've had.
If I hadn't had the loss, I'd probably just roll with it and count myself lucky that I'm not suffering. Instead I'm an anxious mess.

@RaliaMusca all the best for tomorrow. My boobs don't hurt either and I was the same as you...they were massive and painful last time! I am assured...by Google and a number of friends that it is totally normal to not feel the same with a different pregnancy.
Are you able to keep yourself busy today? What time is your appt tomorrow? Xx

@FfayeN thank you, it's good to hear I'm not alone. It just freaks me out because my previous two pregnancies were identical in their symptoms. My worry is that this one hasn't progressed as it should.
I'm working from home today, which is the worst. I'm alone in the house, and my work productivity has been awful since the MMC in August.
Luckily the scan is at 9:30 am tomorrow.
How far along are you now?

@RaliaMusca Oh love I can imagine it's so easy to get distracted when all you can think about is everything being ok. We're almost halfway through the day though and I'm glad your appt is nice and early!
I am 5+2, is it me or is time going backwards?!

@Margo34 I think it’s likely a mixture of it all. We told our DD and grandparents at weekend. And there all so excited. And I almost feel guilty because I just feel a bit meh. Like self preservation I think. I also still convinced something will go wrong somehow. And people knowing has freaked me out a little.
ive l had a few weird days where I keep getting upset. But it was all okay?! I think it’s just massive fear and anxiety. All normal after loss.
Again same also my baby would of been due in like 2 weeks. It’s A mixture of emotions.

i also keep crying an television tho when normally I wouldn’t. So I know my hormones are heightened and playing silly buggers with me. Which doesn’t help.

If it helps at all. I do remember feeling like this with DD too. Due to previous mc. I freaked out telling people. Worried about 16w midwife appointment. Worried about 20 wk scan. Way more than your average person. And once they were kicking and I got past 24 weeks where they viable to be saved. I did relax and start to enjoy it. So I’m hoping that may be the same projectory for me this time. Slowly slowly you start to believe you might actually get there. 🌈

@RaliaMusca good luck for tomorrow lovely, will be thinking of you❤️ I think all your anxiety is so normal, it would be so hard not to overthink everything after a loss! Xxx

@Margo34 sorry lovely I do remember you from before 🥰. I just wanted to validate everything your feeling and say it is totally normal. Even if it wasn't, it's how you feel. Like @Indianna2006 said hopefully it will come in time 😘. So lovely to hear you're doing well so far too xxx

I've made a new thread anyway but just wondering if anyone in here had used the Ava fertility tracker bracelet? I've tracked BBT for a few years but DS keeps breaking my thermometers as it's on my bedside table and of course they are so fun to play with 🙄 so I'm wondering if there is something else that might be better in the long term. I'm not going back on the pill after we eventually get DC2 so I'll be using BBT all the time

😡I need a rage…. Cd1 and I would be 21 weeks pregnant. The postman brings me a letter from the nhs regarding my bloods and giving me my 2nd card to carry around due to antibody c. I didn’t need the 1st one they sent me at 12 weeks but I had only just miscarried so I put that down to admin not getting the information that I was no longer pregnant. However, 9ish weeks on and I’ve no reason to have got this next one! I’m already upset that I’ve got AF and now this.

@mummatara i haven’t heard much about them! Is it something you just wear constantly throughout your cycle? Xx

@Everythingzrosie sounds like we should of been due around a similar time😔 that’s so fustrating! Sending you lots of love xx

@ChloeN you wear it at night only for BBT tracking. It's meant to be more accurate at taking a temp as you've worn it all night than just one temp in the morning. You wear it on your wrist. It's not cheap at £249 but it will be nice to not have to wake up and remember to do temp

@mummatara ah makes sense! BBT is one thing I haven’t done yet! Do you use it just to confirm ovulation? Xx

@ChloeN yes and it's helpful to see after ovulation if temp drops means AF is on her way but if it stays up then for sure a good sign. I def recommend it if you can get your head around doing it. It will confirm when O def was you learn a lot about your cycle doing it so you notice if something is a bit different ❤️ I like the app femometer and have used natural cycles too but prefer femometer both are paid apps but I think a lot of people use fertility friend which is free

@ChloeN seconded that fertility friend is the best of the apps I've seen for temping and graphs that are easy to read and interpret, plus it seems the most responsive to data input (as opposed to PreMom, which seems to do its own sweet thing, although its OPK analysis is useful).

@mummatara I defo think it would give me peace of mind to confirm ovulation, think that’s a worry every month! If this cycle isn’t successful I’m either going to do bbt, or alternatively nothing at all🤣 haven’t quite decided but think maybe a break from testing might be helpful? Here’s me going on about needing a break when I’ve only tracked for 2 months😵‍💫

@curliegirlie thanks lovely, love a free app🤣 if I do bbt I’ll defo download and then ask you all for help on what on earth it means

@ChloeN 😂 honestly lovely I think constantly testing can get so tedious so I don't think it matters if it's been one month two or ten there's always room for a break if you need it ❤️ I found bbt tracking even when we weren't trying interesting my O day really varies by a margin of +/- 7 days. Though maybe once I've been off the pill and not pregnant or breastfeeding for a while it might settle down. Wish I had found it sooner but I suppose medicated contraception is pushed and the norm nothing else was ever mentioned it was the pill or condoms 🤷🏼‍♀️

@mummatara I just got an Ava (been using it for a week). I’m only on day 9 of my cycle so can’t really comment much yet, I’ll report back once I’ve completed this cycle. I also bought it for the same reasons, my toddler always wanted to play with my thermometer every morning plus it was a pain remembering to take my temp.

@HJA87 lol what is it about the thermometers 😂 I don't really want to use the app for tracking I want to input the temp into my current app with all the data I've built up. Would you say temps seem to be in line with how they would normally be if you used a thermometer. I'm just a bit worried it won't accurately take my temp and I would have wasted a lot of money 🤦🏼‍♀️ it would be handy too to not have to lie there and wait to take temp whilst DS is screaming to get out his cot ready for the day 😂

@mummatara ooh I'm v interested in something else. I did the thermometer twice and one reading said error🙄 I will investigate this.