SMEP - anyone giving this a try this month and want to join me?

[Mum2DD89]

New to mumsnet 🙋‍♀️ and I've seen loads of threads where everyone is so lovely and supportive so thought I'd post. This is our 4th cycle ttc #2, 1st cycle giving SMEP a try as I've seen so many success stories. With our first, we got so lucky and ended up pregnant on our first month trying so this waiting is a bit of a shock, although I know out 1st was the exception not the norm! Would love to hear any success stories, or any other ladies that want to compare notes this month x

@fsr111 this was me after AF came I felt so deflated 💔 … but a new cycle brings new prospects so I’m trying to keep my spirits up, you should too 💕
good luck at the GP’s 🤞
tbh I work in a GP’s office and I know firsthand if you are persistent you get an appt - especially if you explain how it’s affecting you mentally, so I’m glad you’ve got your bloods sorted soon, fingers crossed for you everything is fine ✨

@NSx I’m thinking maybe my spotting is a hormonal imbalance.

@fsr111 looks like there’s a few of us wanting to be checked out. I feel the same, that I might be limited in what they offer me as I have a child already. Anything is better than nothing though.

@fsr111 it’s definitely deflating every time AF arrives (although I have a couple days warning it’s still shitty). I’ve felt ok this time though as I already had my appointment booked when AF arrived and it’s making me feel better knowing I’m trying to do something to help

@allgoodthings84 hopefully they can get to the bottom of it 🤞
however it may be nothing at all x

@NSx hopefully it’s nothing at all and I’m just making assumptions. If it wasn’t for the spotting I wouldn’t be in the slightest bit concerned yet. I hope everything comes back normal for you too

@NSxAh, that's good what they did with determining your day21 date. Seems legit.
We did DHs seminogram privately. Not so expensive and non invasive so we though we'd get that box checked early on. The at home ones aren't too bad but as you know you dont get a lot of other information with those.

@fsr111 I like your technique of getting an appointment! I hope it all goes well today, let us know how it went. What was the pelvic ultrasound there to check? I am assuming it was all clear? ttc is a stressful time, i think we all feel the weight of it the longer it goes on for. We are all on the same boat, personally i find these chats really helpful to vent and let it out

@allgoodthings84 it is possible its a hormonal imbalance. Do you get other symptoms that could potentially point that way?

@NatGee I’m not really sure what other symptoms there would be? I don’t know much (anything) about it to be honest. I’m a bit lost in it all.

I think it's normal to panic, but also remember there's only ever a 20% chance of pregnancy each month even if you do everything perfectly in terms of sex at the right time etc. It's perfectly normal for it to take a few months. I wouldn't stress about investigations right now unless you've been trying for 6/9 months plus. It just takes some time sometimes. Especially for those that've been pregnant before. @NatGee a private sperm test sounds good just to check that out first though!

I found the hormone tests to be rubbish anyway, wide range of normal. The progesterone test can be good, but bbt confirms you're ovulating. My hormone ones came back totally normal, but I knew everything wasn't right after a miscarriage. I had acupuncture and felt the difference next cycle. Felt back to normal, no spotting, proper cycle, and I got pregnant the next month.

If SMEP is stressful (and I think it can be, sucks the fun out) I reckon skip it and just have sex every other day for a bit. I tend to get a bit obsessed so trying to remind myself of all of this. It's a really rough time and it can take over your life.

Hope you're all okay xx

@allgoodthings84 I have always had bad acne, even as an adult. In trying to address it I came across a very popular opinion that acne is a symptom of hormonal imbalance. Painful and irregular AFs and heavy bleeding too, although those could be signs of pcos or endometriosis... which, are also hormonal imbalances? Seems like it's a blanket term, used for a lot of conditions.
We live in a very toxic world and think most of us are imbalanced in some way or another

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 thank you for your comforting and encouraging words. I am beginning to dismay at the prospect of it taking a few months. I will be 39 soon so my age is beginning to weigh heavy. Also I had a termination when I was very young and sometimes fear something went wrong back then, which I'd rather know so I don't waste my time ttc

Acupuncture sounds divine and will definitely book myself for some once any physical abnormalities are ruled out - I'm wanting to find out if i have a tied tube or fibroids or something like that?

How are you getting on? x

@NatGee i just wanted to add - I too had a termination when I was younger due to my circumstances and also feared It wouldn’t happen again for me? But it did, so try not to worry about that 💕
I wouldn’t mind checking my OH again but I kind of came to the conclusion that it q

Was fine in Feb, so not much has really changed but now ** @NatGee

@NatGee I completely understand, I'm 38 this year. I actually phoned a fertility clinic when it hadn't happened again 4 cycles after my miscarriage. They (very kindly) laughed at me and told me to come back in a few months. It was oddly reassuring as they could have made money from me with all the tests, the I probably would have sought some help also 🙈

As @NSx says, I know many people who had terminations who it happened for very quickly also. It's so hard not to worry every month though.

I'm the worst, will become obsessive in my 2ww again, I know it.

@NatGee I’m 38 in a couple months too so I totally get your worries etc. if we could know for definite it will happen at some point it wouldn’t be so worrying would it. I’m sure your termination when you was younger hasn’t affected things now and I’m sorry you went through that. How many cycles have you been trying? I think the age thing bothers us who are a bit older and really worries us

I don’t have acne (very rarely even get one spot touch wood) and my cycles are 24-27 days. My periods are 5 days with the first 1.5/2 days being heavy (but normal I think) then 2 lighter days then a very very light 5th day. Sometime I have AF cramps but not every cycle but I can carry on with every day life

@allgoodthings84 i didn’t see your reply,
honestly I think just getting checked will reassure you, but I’m confident there is no issue with you, like people say sometimes this just takes time 😭 and the more you want it the longer it seems to take 🥹

@NSx if I didn’t spot from 10dpo (full AF 13dpo) then I wouldn’t be concerned yet. Impatient definitely 😂 but not concerned. I just keep thinking spotting from then isn’t a good sign for ttc. I wouldn’t be bothered if I wasn’t ttc as it’s so light I can only tell when I wipe (not every time I wipe) and if I wasn’t ttc I wouldn’t be looking at the tissue after wiping ha ha. I don’t feel the spotting. I only found out I spot when the nurse doing my smear 2 days before my AF told me last year so don’t even know how long it’s been happening for. If everything comes back normal I think I’ll still worry about the spotting as I’m an overthinker 🤦‍♀️

@NatGee, the pelvic ultrasound was to check for PCOS and fibroids, that kind of thing. All came back clear. I got referred for it because I have heavy and painful periods so they said they would start ruling stuff out. I spoke to a GP this morning. She's said to book in for bloods on day 21 and she's going to test FSH, progesterone and a couple of other things to check ovulation. She did say if cycles aren't fairly regularly it's unlikely that I'm not ovulating but good to know for sure. She's also referred me to Gynae at the hospital for the periods. She basically she can't refer me for infertility reasons as that's two years (?) but can for the period issue but that there is a 6 month wait for even a first appointment... 🙃 Besides all that there's not much else they can do as obviously wouldn't qualify for IVF or any thing like that because of DD. Where did you find where to test your OH's swimmers? Thinking we should probably rule that out in the meantime.

Sorry, that should say if cycles aren't regular not aren't 🙃 Hope everyone is doing ok today. Glad to have found you guys to share this journey with! X

@fsr111 i don’t think your phone wants you to say ‘are’ 😂. I’m so glad to have you all to chat to too. I think we are all feeling a similar way and this ttc is really hard work emotionally

@allgoodthings84 i totally get it, I’m an over analyser myself so I would be the same, did the nurse say it was something to be concerned about? Hopefully u can get to the bottom of it and put it to bed 🤞

@NSx nah she didn’t seem in the slightest bit phased by it and just said she’s sure they will still get a result from the smear as there wasn’t much there and the smear came back normal so must have been fine for the test. I wasn’t bothered then either as wasn’t even thinking of ttc at that point. I don’t think nurses know much about fertility though? I know it’s often normal to spot before AF and loads of women do but I’m just not sure when it comes to ttc

Hi ladies, CD 13 and I just got a positive opk. We dtd CD 6, 9, 12 and 13 so far.

I am going to read back the thread now to see what I missed. Work has been busy and I joined an online anatomy and physiology class, as I want to study and train to be a reflexologist to help other women with their fertility ☺️

@NSx oh I am sorry to hear that. I know how hard it was for me at the time of my termination, but like you say, I too was young and was the best decision at the time.

@A1b2c3d4e5f6g7 Thank you x and about getting obsessive, that makes two of us! I am feeling relaxed now but AF is still here. No doubt I will shift into a right paranoid android in no time

@allgoodthings84 i'm in 4th cycle. just never thought id be trying for this long. Literally everyone I know fell without a problem, including a couple of older friends. "It happened on our first go" they said... I'm glad for them but difficult not to begin feeling like there's something wrong.

All sounds very normal, so probably no cause for concern where it comes to imbalances. Let's see what the GP says about your spotting tomorrow, fingers crossed its nothing to worry about. Would be good if they sent you for some tests. Not sure which, but doubt they'll be able to tell over the phone?

@fsr111 six month wait? Jesus. Well, it's good theyre getting the ball rolling for you, at least you can begin ruling things out. I think PCOS a would have been pretty annoying problem to deal with, as it takes time to rectify so I'm glad that's off the cards.

@Aurora81 hey, you might be the first of us to go into your tww :) That is awesome, are you studying part time? I did a short course in herbal medicine a couple of years ago and still super interested in it but don't think I am in a position to make a carrer shift now we're palnning for a baby! Happy BDing

CD9 for me now, so off to do some more BD now, but I made the mistake of making pasta for dinner, so now I'm all bloated and full of carbs 😅😭🤦🏻‍♀️ I may just lie back and think of England...

Fingers crossed all the tests and things come back OK for everyone, and it's just a case of us having to be patient 🤞

Has anyone tried acupuncture to help with TTC? I've heard mixed opinions, but the general consensus seems to be that even if it's not helped for definite, it's helped with relaxation, which must reduce all the negative stress hormones we end up with when going through all this fertility uncertainty? So I'm thinking of having a treatment, and apparently CD5-8 is best for the first one, so that would mean if I don't fall this cycle I'd look at going in the first week of October.

@NatGee i think the initial appointment is usually just a chat where they will ask questions and to arrange any tests so it’s no different in person to on the phone. When I made the appointment I only spoke to the receptionist so they don’t know it’s about spotting etc yet. It might be that my progesterone drops too early but I only think that because of the spotting. It could be so many things. If it is progesterone I know they won’t do anything about it but if I know it’s that I could then go private if needs be

@LucyFraser1981 I’ve not had acupuncture but seen some positive stories. I’m not bothered by needles but don’t fancy it at all