First timers, TTC. Safe space for brain dumps...

[TinyDancer91]

Hi everyone!

This thread may or may not contain questions, I've mainly started it to be my brain dump safe space but in an excited way, not a bad way...

Me (30) and my SO (34) have decided to take the leap and start TTC! We have both wanted children for a while but just knew the timing wasn't right for either of us until now. For me, any time I see a baby or even baby clothes recently my heart aches for it to be my turn. I've never really had that strong feeling before.

The reason behind this 'safe space' is that we have agreed not to tell anyone we are TTC. We just want to avoid any pressure or disappointment if things don't go to plan, etc.

For context, I am the youngest of 5, the only girl the only one of my siblings without children.
SO is the oldest of 2, his brother has a child who lives with BM away from here so isn't really seen much by grandparents.

Both families are great and would only want the best for us but I personally don't want to feel any sort or pressure at all (intended or not) from either side.

So, we start our journey, we are on cycle 1 SWI, not expecting anything to happen this cycle and trying not to turn in to a crazy lady about TTC

If anyone else needs a brain dump safe space, feel free to join me here x

Hello @RMS0209 :) that's mad, super close ages! How do you work out what day cycle you are on? Is day 1 the day of your period? My app tells me I'm cycle day 10.
When did you start trying?

I was relieved and pleased! I thought it best to check just in case we needed to speed the process up. Even though we are still young, I wanted to be sure all was ok. I've just had the Amazon stick ones, I think they are called One Step?
Haha slippers on then! Xx

Hi! @Glawen
Yes, day 1 is the day of your period so if you spot (like I do) don't count that until she makes a proper full appearance.

I am on cycle 6, I think I went crazy cycle 1 but who knows!
No that's very right, I have just had some bloods at the dr yesterday and I have been for a fertility assessment (waiting on my results)
Oh yes! I use the easy @ home you get them on Amazon and the "pre mom" app which is free - it's very good I like it. X

@RMS0209 thank you that's so helpful. I've been doing lots of reading and research but so not down with the lingo!

Good luck for your results, hope they go well for you. Thank you for the tip, I'll have a look at the app this evening :)

Are you taking any vitamins/folic acid etc? X

Hi ladies, can I come join in?

DH and I are TTC for a little bambino and after having more sex this month than we've had all year to date... I came on my period this morning. I know it's only cycle one but damn it! I was so hoping we'd be among the lucky first timers club.

Anyone else unreasonably sad this early in the process? I'm such an anxious perfectionist and I feel so cross with myself which I know is idiotic.

On the plus side, we are in France this weekend with friends who, much as I dearly love, I wouldn't want to tell them I'd had a BFP so early on if it had worked for us this month. Our trips away are always boozy affairs so that would have been difficult. Plus now I can have all the charcuterie and brie I want! Clutching at straws I know...

Sending hopeful thoughts to all!

@TinyDancer91 we seem to be on a very similar schedule! My AF due tomorrow, I did a test 9DPO and was a BFN, I’m feeling a bit disheartened now as we’ve been trying since January and still nothing.

Day to day I try not to think about it but every now and then (like right now) I feel really down and I wonder why it hasn’t happened for us yet. Both of my sister in laws have got pregnant by accident after really not wanting a baby in the last six months! I just think how has it happened for them when they’re not trying and it’s not happened for me who’s been trying for 6 months! I wish we could just go to the GP now for reassurance, feeling a bit stressed today!

@Glawen no problem, anything to try help 😊
At the moment I am taking just plain folic acid from boots, I tried supplements that didn't agree with me last cycle but I do have "wild nutrition" ones to take next cycle if need be, I have already started my partner on the male version. What are you taking x

Okay so after my panic yesterday, I took a test and it had a faint positive! I didn’t know whether to believe it or not so I took another a few hours later and it was positive too! However it was still faint.

I stayed up late last night (I’m about to start night shifts) and drank 500ml water at 2am. Then slept, woke at 4am had a pee and then woke up at 8am and tested again. This morning the test is negative.

AF is due today so we’ll just see if it arrives but what do you think?

Morning @Zubi !

How are you feeling today? Have you tested again?

Keeping everything crossed for you x

Hi guys

Sorry for the radio silence from me the past few days.... been in a really weird place mentally and also super busy with other stuff going on (we are currently in show week at my dancing school!).

@Glawen welcome! We (meaning me!) are normally a bit more positive than the last few posts I promise! 😂 It's good news thats your tests came back as ok. Wishing you lots of luck in your journey - please keep us updated!

@ladydorito welcome to you too! Enjoy your trip to France. Lots of luck to you too in your TTC journey!

@Zubi yes, we seem to be almost in sync! Although based on your last few posts, looks like you may be having more luck than me! hoping the BFP sticks for you. The BFN may have been down to how much water you had before, I've heard this can affect results.

As for me, still no AF for me, also still getting BFNs.... feeling very confused right now, both Flo and PreMom apps are telling me AF is late by a day or 2. Not sure what to do or how to feel. I've been feeling VERY hormonal the past week without knowing the reason (AF or BFP), I've wanted to just sit and cry at any given moment, including right now. I don't know what to do for the best, every time I test and get a BFN I feel so crushed but I also just need to know. I've not had any cramping like I normally get around AF but my stomach has been all over the place (maybe a little TMI).

Just to add, the BFNs are definitely BFNs, not even the slightest line is visible. I've used cheaper tests, more expensive tests, early tests... Help a girl out, what do I do?!🥺😵‍💫

I think I must have had a chemical pregnancy, this morning I went to the toilet and spotting has begun so I’m calling it that AF is in full swing now. Words can’t even express how gutted me and my husband are, we really thought this was it!

@TinyDancer91 i think I’ve been in this situation before! Unfortunately for me I just got my period a couple of days late. But I feel like it’s been 6 months now and this is really playing with my head! I was super emotional this month too, I cried when my husband left for work yesterday haha! Fingers crossed we see those BFPs soon xx

@Zubi oh no, that sucks!

So, in the 30 mins since my last post, with no signs all morning, AF has decided to arrive for me as well... kind of feel better having an answer but doesn't make it any easier to accept the answer.

@TinyDancer91 I honestly. Amy think about it or I'll have a meltdown! But I'm honestly glad we are in the exact same situation, dates and everything, it's a reassurance that someone is going through it too! This month will be our month 🤞🏼

This is completely irrational but my heart was broken a little today. My partner told me today that his brother & (almost) sister-in-law are possibly expecting.... this will be the 3rd time for them in 2 years, none of which were planned. The other 2 times unfortunately she miscarried due to her blood type.

It hurt knowing that they can just accidentally fall pregnant that many times when we have been trying unsuccessfully and want it so much!

I know I'm being unreasonable but I just had to let my feelings out on here. My partner's response is very horizontal about the whole thing and his opinion is very much 'it will happen when it happens' ... I just can't help but feel upset but for me, not for them.

@TinyDancer91 not unreasonable at all! As I’ve said on here, both of my sister in laws have fallen pregnant in the last six months without trying, they both profusely talked about how they don’t want a baby yet before they did get pregnant and even one of them now she’s pregnant still talks about how she doesn’t want it! I try and keep a straight face make no comments but it breaks my heart honestly. To top it off one of them is staying with us right now whilst her husband is away. I’ve cried both times I found out they were pregnant, I’m over the moon for them and can’t wait to meet the little ones but I’m sad for myself!

Does anyone else really struggle with their hormones at the minute? Can't work out whether it's the TTC journey, coming off the pill or something else but I go through bouts of being really hormonal 🤷🏻‍♀️

Lots of people say they aren’t trying as to manage expectations, stop people asking them questions, pretend that they are chill.

I would think that this is more likely after two ‘unplanned’ miscarriages. They may be terrified of it happening again and want everyone to see it as an accident, que será será, as to not put more pressure on the situation.

Just checking in. How are we all doing? Any BFPs?

Back in the TWW... cue the longest 14 days of the month...

Anyone else in the TWW?

@TinyDancer91 how are you doing?

We are hanging on until next month to try as our wedding is in 6 weeks and I don't want it to worry us or if I am unwell at all x

@Glawen 6 weeks to go! That's exciting!! Congrats on the wedding, fingers crossed you get a honeymoon baby 🤞🏻

I've been struggling the last couple of cycles if I'm honest. Wonder whether it will ever happen. I'm such a planner for big things like this that it's stressing me out that I can't plan this!! 😩 trying to keep myself busy though so I can't think too much about it

Hi all, hope it’s ok for me to join.
im on cycle #4 TTC my first and I’m also getting disheartened about it not happening! I think especially because last cycle we dtd every day apart from 2 days and it was tough 😂.
Can see there’s a few of us on here who feel like this which is comforting even though I know for some it can take up to a year and it’s completely normal.
im going on holiday next week on my fertile period so hoping that will help!

Also if I do manage to get pregnant l, I will refuse to take contraception ever again 😂

Welcome @HS99!

Hope you have a fab holiday! And get a BFP in the process!!

We are now 1dpo and are actually on cycle #7! I thought it was only #6.... guess that means we are not in the 80% who conceive within 6 months of trying 😔

Feeling a little bit broken but trying to stay positive. Trying not to get my hopes up for this month but it's so hard!! Still, there's nothing more I can do this month, que sera sera! 🤞🏻🙏🏻🥺🤰🏻

How is everyone?

Anyone in the TWW? We are now 5dpo and feeling really tired today.

Sending love & baby dust to all 💕

I'm currently 5 dpo cycle #5. Trying not to get my hopes up too much this cycle, told myself I was going to chill out about it all and just see what happens.. easier said than done!!

Hope this is the one for you! ☺️ x