Entering into 8th cycle..

[Indianna2006]

Entering into 8th cycle…ttc number 2.

Feeling defeated and deflated even though I know odds are still on our side really..
I already have a DD who is 3 years 9 months so very much feel time is of the essence. Just desperate for it to happen now.

Feel like either people seem to fall super fast or seem like 12 months plus and don’t find many “in the middle” types.

Ive fallen pregnant 1st cycle before. And then DD took 7 cycles. So hence why this failed 7th cycle seems like a miserable milestone!

Anyone welcome to keep me company. Sucks 😫

@OK92 nope still not yet. It’s been 2 weeks tomorrow so no idea when we find out. Was error in my swabs too have have to wait another 2 weeks for al that to be done. So nothing for me will be sent off for a while.

Fingers crossed for tww. You never know! I’m on CD5 so boring territory x

@Indianna2006 that's such a pain you have to redo tests!

Cramps ramping up a bit now and think I'm either 10 or 11 DPO. Unsure as I didn't track just going by CM. No spotting yet though which I'm clinging onto as last two cycles I've started spotting on 11DPO before AF the next day.

@OK92 any month could be the one hun.
Just gotta try keep faith and keep going. I’m sure your DH has enough swimmers one is gonna get there at some point!!

I seen so many cycle 12 and 13 BFPs they do happen. So I’m clinging onto that hope lol.

But me and DH have both now just had covid. And I think covid can affect mens swimmer for 2/3 months so now I’m like meh. But just keep going.

@Indianna2006 oh hope you're ok!

I guess I spoke too soon as I've just started getting some tinged CM, which comes before spotting, which comes before AF 😞

@OK92 we’ve not been too bad. Now coming to end of isolation. But hope it’s not affected the swimmers too much. Even if there is any good ones!
So annoying still waiting to know. But then almost knowing then makes it seem hopeless. Can’t win can you lol.

Oh no 😫 keep your chin up hun. It WILL happen. Just not in our timeframe. But it will!

@Indianna2006 hopefully it hasn't. And you get some good results soon 🤞🏼

Ugh I hate this whole process so much 😩

@Indianna2006 took a test obviously a BFN so just waiting for AF now. Had a cry to DH. I’m sure our time will come I just don’t know when and I feel like life is just so unfair right now! I’m sure I’ll pick myself up once AF is in full flow and then onto the next cycle 😞

@OK92 ah so sorry hun. That day is the worst. The disappointment. And what feels like eternity.
Have a cuppa. Eat some chocolate. I’m a few days the cloud lifts again. And that month is a new chance.

Sending hugs your way. Life is unfair. Very unfair. But good things will come our way. I’m certain of that.

@FlyOnTheWall89 @OK92

So called Drs to checks on results as we hadn’t had. Receptionist said they were back and “normal”. So I asked for a print out I just went and picked up.

Little confused as we don’t seem to have all parameters noted properly and no morphology noted. But seems high number and high motility. So I have no clue why we are not pregnant!!

Sperm Motility 71%
Percent non progressive 8%
Sperm concentration per ml: 213 million
Total sperm count: 489 million

😫😫 I mean WHY am I not pregnant..I’m thinking I need my tubes checked!

It doesn’t note Morphology though which is weird. Just said semen appearance normal but think that means the colour etc.

But I mean with those numbers surely even with low morphology you could get pregnant at some point?!

Hi @Indianna2006 and @OK92 - I've been on a little MN break which coincided with a long weekend away - much needed.

I had a massive cry last night when we got home as i got our referral letter for formal fertility investigations and it's a phone consultation at the end of July - I'm totally devastated. How can it be that long away?

@Indianna2006 with those results, even with low morphology, you have every chance of a pregnancy. I think you need to perhaps tick some things off the list to get checked. I've lost track so I'll just say everything even tho I'm sure you've already done some of these:
Day 3 & 21 bloods
Transvaginal ultrasound
AMH blood test
HSG - not sure if this would need to be private in which case I think it's between £400-500
Do you have painful periods? Could you have undiscovered endo?
Ensure you're getting enough nutrients. Maybe go the whole hog and do the next few months without coffee / booze. It is so frustrating but you may just be the girl that falls in the gets pregnant within a year but even tho everything is deemed 'normal', it does take that hideously long amount of time!

@OK92 my temps are dropping now so I too am probs a day or 2 away from AF.

I think the length of this process is really getting to me now mentally. I feel this pent up anxiety and I know I'm months / weeks away from second baby announcements and friends who are recently married having quick conceptions. It's all getting a bit much. It's so easy for men to say just don't think about it, but it is totally impossible for me. It is such a burden on the mind.

We have booked Dr Ramsay now so that is our next goal/step and we will take it from there. Sad times guys. X

@Indianna2006 wow those results are great - that must be a big relief! Is getting tubes checked the next step for you?

@FlyOnTheWall89 so sorry you're feeling like this. I totally get the anxiety around announcements, I have a few close friends weddings this year and am now dreading them getting pregnant before I manage to which seems increasingly likely at this rate. Hopefully Dr Ramsey can give some good advice, we are seeing him in a few weeks and it can't come soon enough.

I can't believe the appointment isn't until July. That is ridiculous. Are you referred to a specific place? I wonder if wait times are shorter anywhere slightly further away? I'm not sure how it works. my fingers are crossed your BFP comes before then.

Interesting you mention endo - I have V painful periods and the pain starts a good few days before AF shows. But how does one know if they have it? I've had a transvaginal scan which only picked up PCO but nothing else. And assume as I managed to conceive once it's ok but who knows.

The only MN threads I read now are this and the 9 months TTC one which I'll probably join after we've had next round of check ups. I get too jealous and sad looking at other threads full of BFPs.

@FlyOnTheWall89 @OK92

I know I opened the results and was almost like what. Made me feel a bit like meh. I know my body’s been a bit suboptimal but what the hell is happening to all that sperm.

Ive started taking vitamin and improving my blood flow to my pelvis last few cycles and my periods are much more improved. I was hardly getting anything before and it was just brown and not very healthy. I have lots of pelvis issues. So I’m hoping I might be on the right track there. And maybe I’m not getting pregnant because it just hasn’t been the right time for my body.

So I’ve only had day 21 bloods done. And thyroid bloods. Both normals. Fertility clinic would be day 3 here and FSH and LH etc. but how long that wait will be god knows.

I have had US previously. For other issues. Last one 18 months ago which showed no issues then. So only 9 months prior to us ttc. So can’t imagine much has changed. But it may be something I consider to tick off.

I think mainly next thing will be Hycosy privately. But I’ll see what dr says Friday and see how long wait will be for referall in this area. If it’s anything like July like yours I’ll deff go private if no luck after this cycle for me.

Yeh exactly it’s June we’ve been ttc for a year. So we have a while as yet. But I get a couple more cycle in because I have shorter cycles slightly. But 13 is average you’d fit in a year with an average 28 day cycle. So I still have 3 goes. And maybe just be one those people it takes longer for whatever reason.
Even with that much sperm!!

We know we work together as we have twice before. I do feel a bit relieved his result are fine and really actually good minus we don’t know morphology. But even with a low one like you said. With 500 million count nearly it would still be tonnes and tonnes of sperm to get there.

Think I just need to try chill out and just the process.
And I’ll consider private Hycosy and US after I’ve spoken to dr. But deff won’t bother with another SA for DH as be wasted money lol!

So sorry you feel like that. It is so so tough. And I can only imagine how disheartened you feel with each go now that it’s not likely. See Dr Ramsey and what he has to say. But that wait for NHS is mad isn’t it. And only phone consult too. Let alone anything else 😫😫 I’m so sorry.
There taking the supplements now so hopefully that helps. Like I said DH has been taking fertil aid for 5 months. So maybe it’s why his results are so good and also high dose vitamin C and B12 as they were most important for count and motility.

@Indianna2006 getting them done is supposedly meant to give you a boost too. A lady on the other thread got her BFP after 14 months, 2 months after her HSG.... I think you probs know that as we are on the same threads 😂.

@OK92 so you can't detect endo on a transvaginal scan. I think it's via a number of different symptoms and you'd have to take some advice on it. It can be really really hard to diagnose. Follow Gabrielle Caunesil on insta - she has a highlight thread about her experience of basically a failure to diagnose - it took her a year to get her BFP, but it did come eventually. She is very honest and explains a lot.

We have been referred to Chelsea & Westminster and I'm hoping some cancellations bring our appointment forward. My partner will do a second SA before we go to see Dr Ramsay so we have 2 results to work with, 10 weeks apart after 10 weeks on a lot of supplements. Good luck with your appointment - I'm fascinated to hear more about this man everyone speaks so highly of.

I too mostly just have 3 threads I look at. 2 of which you two are on 😂. The optimism gets to me on the other threads - Whoops did I say that out loud. wish it didn't but you've got to just accept these things. Xx

@Indianna2006 sorry took too long typing and didn't see you reply. Sounds like you're on top of everything. My GP did my day 3 bloods which involves testing so many different things so that could shed some light on the situation but perhaps it just isn't the right time as you say ... kind of exciting that statistically if all is fine, you're so likely to conceive in the next 3/4 months. Xx

@FlyOnTheWall89 yep logically I’m trying to tell myself. We’ve been pregnant twice before. DH clearly has no issues his side. My bodies been through a lot the last few times. Maybe it’s just waiting for it right time.

I feel slightly less anxious than I did. But still know you can have unexplained infertility. But yes next 3/4 months could well be all it takes to get those two pink lines.
It would just have made be fight to get better for these last 4 years all worth it.

I shall plod on for now and see what the next few cycles being and start looking into some private costs and places.

Is there anyway you could pay out privately for more stuff and speed things up? Or is it not really an option if you hope to use any IVF NHS cycles etc. it’s almost so hard isn’t it when a lot of the optical feels like the weight.

Like if in 10 weeks time you have second SA and it’s similar and they say IVF. If there was no wait you could almost come ti terms with it because something is then happening. And you will get your baby and you can it in the future. It’s the sucky wait times which suck the life out of ppl imo.
Waiting until July just feels like 😫

And it’s okay to not wanna see any other threads. Ppl come and go so fast. And there’s excitement and anticipation. Rather than fear and anxiousness. Becomes two different worlds xxx

@Indianna2006 that's good you've improved your periods, and you're right - I need to keep reminding myself that too - it'll happen when my body is ready. And I will be so grateful whenever that is!

@FlyOnTheWall89 thank you that's really useful I'm going to watch that highlight of hers tonight.

Ordering the ferti-lily for next cycle. May as well give yet another thing a try 😂🤷🏻‍♀️

@OK92 yes give the ferti lily a shot. Why not! I’m using it this cycle but properly in the right place.

And logically in my head I think if I’m shoving all that sperm right up there. It HAS to bloody find the egg.

I am starting to think my blood flow pelvis issues are affecting anything implanting possibly..So I’m researching when people take aspirin from ovulation to BFP. When they have recurrent miscarries and if you have clotting issues. Which runs in my family. I had to take aspirin when I was pregnant and have blood thinners due to my increased risk.
So I’m gonna try it this cycle. And see if I have any luck. Apparently it ensure blood flow remains optimum to the endometrium and uterus so implantation can happen. But obv would only help if that is an issue if that makes sense.
Theombophilia runs in my family.

If no luck this cycle. I may pay for private hycosy next cycle on cycle 12. I feel like NHS referall is just gonna take far too long!

We’ve been trying over a year now and I’m 2 days late according to my Flo app with a terrible evap line on Clear blue. 😩😩 it appeared after approx. 10-15 minutes.

Now the waiting game begins. I ordered 4 FRERs so when I get them, I’m going to try them with FMU. Today’s test was done with second. 😬

@lilrosemarie is that an evap line?! God that’s bad isn’t it. I’d think that’s positive. Hopefully your FRERs come soon!
Good luck! xx

Just spoke to my Dr. He’s referring me for an US now to check my uterus and ovaries etc. I did have one 18 months ago but least that’s ticks it off for me. Just to check nothing has changed in that time.

@Indianna2006 yes exactly, each cycle I'm trying something different to make myself feel less depressed about another cycle going past! Anxious about getting it in properly. Will need to practice beforehand.

That's great you've been referred, hopefully nothing untoward and just some peace of mind amongst this waiting game we are all in! And sounds sensible about the aspirin too. You must not be too far from fertile window now. Im jealous 😂 CD2 here 🙄

I'm also tempted by a hycosy but equally need to sort DH sperm first, if we can. Then if nothing comes of that maybe hycosy later this year.

@OK92 yes I deff recommend practising beforehand. An maybe try locate you cervix yourself first with your finger so see if it’s angled more in one direction. An then it needs to go as deep as you can get it. I got it in right place by putting it in and then laying with my legs up wall and it like auctioned up even further where it needed to go 😂😂

Yep basically just about fertile week. CD9. And ovulation usually CD13. So within my 5 day window. Another go. Another round lol.

How are you @OK92 ? I'm a few days behind you. Cycle day 5 now. I have a phone call with the hospital today after getting very lucky and calling just after someone cancelled yesterday. X

@FlyOnTheWall89 oh that’s amazing! So your phone call is today instead of July?!

Goes to show if your persistent, have to push for yourself don’t you! Ah I’m so pleased.
Let us know how it goes and what they say xxx