9 months TTC and losing hope

[BritInNZ]

Hi everyone

Anyone else nearing that year mark of TTC and just feeling down and wondering when/if it will happen?

DH and I had a private fertility appointment this month and AMH and SA all good - no obvious reason why we can't conceive. We have to keep trying until January when we hit that year mark and then have more investigations.

I KNOW it can take healthy couples up to a year but it's only 3 cycles away now and I feel like I'm at the stage I don't even hope for a BFP as I know it's not coming.

I just turned 29 and DH is 31, so I know we have some time but it doesn't help when you're wondering what's going wrong.

Currently CD1 so obviously feeling a bit meh anyway, so just looking to chat to others in the same boat as I feel alone and like everyone else gets pregnant quickly ☹️ also visiting in-laws this weekend and when we booked it at the start of the year I was hoping it would be a trip to give them some good news, so that's a bit heartbreaking too.

@Aubyone really hope it's a BFP for you! It sounds very promising. Keep us updated xx

Keeping everything crossed @Aubyone, how exciting but also nerve wracking. I know what you mean about that incredibly obvious negative so if it looks different.... well it could be the first BFP since @BritInNZ started this!

Thanks for the recommendation @kmbegs. I am going to buy it! X

@FlyOnTheWall89 @Chaz5041 has had a BFP! X

Yes sorry @LucyAnne34 - I meant girls that have been on here for a while but I may have missed some pages along the way and missed that one. Fingers crossed @Aubyone x

It will probably happen. Many people take a year to conceive - the m have three kids, one after another! It's too soon to be worrying about infertility, try to enjoy your life as it is for the time being and put babies to the back of your mind.

Good luck.

'then' have three kids, not 'them'.

Ah ok, we are all in the same boat though, no matter how long we have been in the group ☺️ Nobody seemed to congratulate her that’s all x

@blyn72 sadly it's a hugely mentally consuming time, mo matter how much you 'try to enjoy your life'. Certainly for me, it is hugely consuming but I do still very much enjoy my life and live / plan my life normally. I love that many have success and then quick following pregnancies but in the moment, in the here and now, it feels like a lifetime.

@blyn72 and I am under no illusion some have been trying for years.... some serious perspective has been gained in the last 10 months.

@LucyAnne34 that's great for that person but I hadn't seen them contributing anything to the group other than the BFP announcement so I think @FlyOnTheWall89 probably just didn't count it because that person hadn't joined in with the group or shared anything other than that (although could be wrong). I also personally find it difficult to engage with anything that has a "just relax" vibe to it - hence why I'm also not engaging with another post here 🤦🏻‍♀️

That’s fair enough, just think everyone deserves that congratulations that’s all x

[quote FlyOnTheWall89]@blyn72 sadly it's a hugely mentally consuming time, mo matter how much you 'try to enjoy your life'. Certainly for me, it is hugely consuming but I do still very much enjoy my life and live / plan my life normally. I love that many have success and then quick following pregnancies but in the moment, in the here and now, it feels like a lifetime. [/quote]
Bless you.

It isn't something anyone else can really understand unless they are in your shoes.

I do hope you achieve your dream.

@blyn72

It will probably happen. Many people take a year to conceive - the m have three kids, one after another! It's too soon to be worrying about infertility, try to enjoy your life as it is for the time being and put babies to the back of your mind.

Good luck.

This is a really unhelpful post and not contributing positively to this discussion. These are exactly the kind of comments we don't want, please think before posting.

@Aubyone this is so exciting!!! Have everything crossed for you! Please keep us updated?

I'm off to my fertility appointment this morning 😬 will let you all know how it goes! Not expecting much as it's not like we are planning to go for IVF yet...

Hi guys, I can't actually believe I am saying this, but I am now convinced by my line (ngl, have taken several through the day - only 2 Frers but also cheapies). The line is faint, but clear as day and I am fully convinced.

I can't believe it you guys. Its been 14 months!

Sorry meant to attach a pic!

I know it's faint but it's actually very clear IRL.

I am genuinely sorry if this is not something that's helpful to see this evening for anyone - but I'm also hoping it might give you reassurance.

Also, maybe the increased chances after Hycosy/HSG really is true?

I can totally see it. OMG. @Aubyone I'm so happy for you. Keeping everything crossed. When did you have your HSG? Was it 2 months ago now? X

Hi @FlyOnTheWall89 thank you so much. Its actually getting clearer and brighter by the minute, it's been 20mins now since that test and it's totally undeniably there.

I had my Hycosy on 14th Dec so about 6 weeks - I had the cycle immediately after it 'off' so this is the 2nd cycle after it. I had my follow up appointment on Thurs and not sure whether to cancel - if I'm definitely still testing positive on Thurs morning I will cancel I think.

I had to come tell you guys straight away - especially as i am currently home alone - have texted hubby something nonchalant about seeing whether his WiFi is good enough for a video catch up, as he isn't home until Sunday and although I don't really want to not tell him in person, I also can't see how I can chat to him and keep this from him til then! Plus he went away on this trip feeling a but down about his SA results (unnecessarily) and I know he's probably worrying and not drinking/relaxing. Eeeek.

Sorry, I won't go on about this too much but I've appreciated this thread so much over the last few months and am going to be rooting for you all SO hard.

@Aubyone CONGRATULATIONS! This made me properly shed a tear (in a good way). 14 months of nothing and a BFP - this is hope for us all!!! Honestly so delighted for you and so glad you shared this with us.

books hycosy immediately 😂

@Aubyone also I can clearly see it so I'm sure it's even more clear in real life. This is the best news so thrilled for you x

@kmbegs me too hahaha. @Aubyone omg you poor thing, you just be climbing the walls with excitement and your hubby isn't there. What timing. I really hope you get a video call with him. So cute. Honestly so happy. X

@Aubyone omg there is def a line on that test!! Congratulations!!

Congratulations @Aubyone gives me hope after my HSG this month x

@Aubyone this is amazing news!!!! Congratulations! This has given me a bit of hope when I was pretty much at nothing. I can't even imagine how you're feeling right now!! Enjoy it!!!

Thank you so much ladies. I really appreciate it. I genuinely had got into the head space of 'well clearly if it was going to happen, it would have and we definitely need assistance', so this really is a surprise. One helpful thing I might share is that I can confirm that the cheapo 'Easy@home' brand pregnancy tests (on Amazon, box of 20) are just as sensitive as FRER. It's slightly harder to see the line, but not my much and they are significantly cheaper. Also, I feel obliged to share that one thing I did differently this month was (just once) I used a menstrual cup immediately after sex and left itt there for an hour. I'm not saying this worked, but I feel I must share to you guys just in case it was what 'made a difference'.

I'm going to watch this thread and looking forward to seeing more BFPs but I won't contribute unless actively asked something. Thank you @BritinNZ for setting the thread up, and I hope your appointment tomorrow is a positive experience and gives you some helpful info.

Thanks again ladies xxxx