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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

18, really nervous here

170 replies

tonijane17 · 09/08/2021 13:45

Hi there.. I'm 18 and have been with my boyfriend for a few months... We had unprotected sex (please don't say anything unkind because it won't help me) on day 19 of my usual 30 day cycle (I use an app to track this)... I'm due on my period in 10 days and am wondering if any of you have any advice as to whether I could be pregnant and if anyone has anything that could prevent pregnancy that isn't the morning after... Please 🙏

OP posts:
cookiecreampie · 23/08/2021 09:00

I'm not judging you at all but I would advise setting up home on your own first and if things last with your boyfriend, he could move in. Things may not work out so you need to be prepared for the possibility you could be a single parent, there's nothing wrong with that. A relationship won't work out just because you have a baby. I fell pregnant very quickly into my last relationship and we're now married, but we were late 20s at the time and I already had children.

Candycotton · 23/08/2021 09:11

@ineedaholidaynow Yes, of course they do/did, but I am just saying I would of hated to see the 'advice' she would have received.

The thing is though, OP has already said she didn't want advice and didn't appreciate it so I just don't' understand why people are still commenting.

As for the person who commented how long they had been trying to conceive for...well that sucks that it takes anyone that long but the reason that person posted that is evident.

kirinm · 23/08/2021 09:15

@fallingup

😭😭😭 and here's me TTC for 2 years!
I've been ttc for nearly two years. That someone else can get pregnant isn't some sort of slight against you. Plenty of people get pregnant. Why don't you go and do the crying emoji on other posts? Because actually, what you're doing is judging her because she's young.
kirinm · 23/08/2021 09:21

And LOL to whoever suggested not rushing into a tenancy agreement. She's 18 not 12.

It isn't that unusual for an 18 year old to live away from home.

SmidgenofaPigeon · 23/08/2021 09:23

It is with no job and a baby on the way though surely @kirinm?

lyntheyresexpeople · 23/08/2021 09:23

@fallingup - isn't ops fault at all though is it. Your comment is a very clear dig. Just unnecessary.

RampantIvy · 23/08/2021 09:25

As guarantor for my DD's tenancy, I still feel that it is prudent for the OP to wait before rushing into renting somewhere to live.

ineedaholidaynow · 23/08/2021 09:38

@kirinm would you advise someone to enter into a tenancy agreement with someone they have known for 2 months, and who they would be relying on to make the payments. If that person leaves they could be solely responsible for the rent. Surely you would at least check what their rights and financial position would be.

TeabagsGalore · 23/08/2021 09:39

All babies are a blessing and bring their love with them. Try and keep up with your friendship groups and education; talk to college as there are quite often hnc part~time/evening classes or online courses and may be help with fees, childcare etc. Local health visitors/midwives will know of different free nhs ante~natel classes and groups where you'll meet other mums. My daughter took part in a younger mum's group which provided friendship and mutual support run by a local Family Centre.
She also found mummy friendships through NCT (National Chilbirth Trust) classes but they weren't cheap and were a bit older then her but very welcoming. Enjoy your pregnancy . X ♥

LH1987 · 23/08/2021 09:47

@FatAnkles

Such judgy horrible remarks. Angry
I know, I am genuinely shocked that people feel the need to be so horrible! What void is it filling?

For what it’s worth, congratulations OP! Yes, having a baby is difficult and hard work but it does also bring such joy and happiness.

kirinm · 23/08/2021 09:48

[quote ineedaholidaynow]@kirinm would you advise someone to enter into a tenancy agreement with someone they have known for 2 months, and who they would be relying on to make the payments. If that person leaves they could be solely responsible for the rent. Surely you would at least check what their rights and financial position would be.[/quote]
Have you ever rented? Do you think letting agents let anyone move in unless they've been credit checked and have proof of earnings?

Original poster
tonijane17 · 23/08/2021 11:22

Well actually everyone regarding the bitchy comments about how long I've been with my partner and our income - if you must know he has a decent income of nearly 2k per month, and I'll be getting 800 a month from SAAS for my HNC. And as for the tenancy, we were already doing that before I found out I was pregnant, we were already on the housing register. Personally I cba with all of this and I'm trying to enjoy my pregnancy. So what if I planned it? How many people have had children this young and have continued to stay with the father and have a happy life? I'm probably the youngest on this thread but by God are some of you immature. You don't seem to get that I know it's gonna be a difficult journey? I GET THAT! But it'll be worth it, so keep all your petty negativity to yourselves.

OP posts:
Original poster
tonijane17 · 23/08/2021 11:28

Oh and also for all of you over-concerned people - I was a smoker but have now stopped ever since I got that positive test. Stop being so up yourselves and piss off - focus on your own TTC journey rather than my personal situation.

OP posts:
Urghhhhh · 23/08/2021 11:34

@tonijane17

Well actually everyone regarding the bitchy comments about how long I've been with my partner and our income - if you must know he has a decent income of nearly 2k per month, and I'll be getting 800 a month from SAAS for my HNC. And as for the tenancy, we were already doing that before I found out I was pregnant, we were already on the housing register. Personally I cba with all of this and I'm trying to enjoy my pregnancy. So what if I planned it? How many people have had children this young and have continued to stay with the father and have a happy life? I'm probably the youngest on this thread but by God are some of you immature. You don't seem to get that I know it's gonna be a difficult journey? I GET THAT! But it'll be worth it, so keep all your petty negativity to yourselves.
So you did plan it, didn't you?
SmidgenofaPigeon · 23/08/2021 11:35

That’s remarkable you’re on the housing register, I didn’t know getting a council flat was so simple, especially if your partner could afford to rent in the private sector and you presumably have a safe place to live already at home.

Original poster
tonijane17 · 23/08/2021 11:36

By "you" you must mean my partner and I. Yes. It takes two to tango - I didn't rape him or give him false pretenses regarding contraception.

Oh and also phoned Glasgow Maternity earlier. Midwife appointment on 26th September and scan on 26th October.

OP posts:
Original poster
tonijane17 · 23/08/2021 11:37

@SmidgenofaPigeon Getting on the council register was simple and as his two adult twin brothers share a room we got overcrowding priority.

OP posts:
ineedaholidaynow · 23/08/2021 11:42

So you were planning to live together after a month of going out with each other, does the pregnancy bump you up the waiting list?

SmidgenofaPigeon · 23/08/2021 11:42

No, the pregnancy does nothing with regards to points on a waiting list until the baby is born.

tonijane17 · 23/08/2021 11:43

This reply has been deleted

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DecorChange · 23/08/2021 11:47

I've been here and done this. But I was 16. Was only with OH for 2 months when I got pregnant. Now 13 years still later we are still together. Bought a house ect.... dosent mean it's the end if the world but can be very hard going. Wish you all the best.

kirinm · 23/08/2021 11:49

@SmidgenofaPigeon

That’s remarkable you’re on the housing register, I didn’t know getting a council flat was so simple, especially if your partner could afford to rent in the private sector and you presumably have a safe place to live already at home.
Showing your ignorance then, aren't you? Anyone can go on the housing register.
Original poster
tonijane17 · 23/08/2021 11:50

@DecorChange thank you ❤️

OP posts:
SmidgenofaPigeon · 23/08/2021 11:51

Yes, anyone can.

However there are a lot of points and priority hoops to get through. Perhaps OP lives in an area where council properties are bountiful and handed out to young people who care capable of affording in the private sector, which is incredibly fortunate, as I can assure you it is not the case in most of the U.K.

kirinm · 23/08/2021 11:54

No there isn't. There is a housing register anyone can join. Whether she gets a council flat / house is a completely different matter and is entirely down to the points system. The OP hasn't claimed she has got one. Just that she's on the list.

You're too busy judging to read apparently.