TTC 4th baby at 39

[Hopetobeamumof4]

Hi girls,

I am so frustrated. I’ve been trying to conceive my fourth since feb. All 28-35 day cycles and no joy: this last cycle has been 45 days so far with me ovulating on cd32. Pregnancy test is negative today 😭 the doctor is not interested but has said he will test to see if I’m peri menopausal. I conceived first month with my other three. This is a new partner but he has a child so I don’t get what the problem is. Sorry I just needed to rant to someone who may understand x

Welcome @msanne. Like you I also thought I was done after the third but here i am ttc number 4 🙈 it was my DH's idea to begin with but then I thought it would be nice for our last one to have a sibling close in age. I've had both jabs now, but my second was just before my current cycle so I will find out if it's affected my cycles. I really hope not lol! I'm not breastfeeding anymore. It's quite a good thing your periods have resumed, should make ttc easier. How old are your other ones?

Sorry about your BFN @80sPadme, hope you're okay. Maybe it's too soon and you're not out yet.

@jellybean55 how are you getting on with the smep?

@msanne Hello & welcome. I don’t think anyone is crazy for wanting another. As far as the covid vaccine & cycle goes, it did mess mine up for about 3 months but thinks it’s back to normal now. Fingers crossed it is as it’s a nightmare when you’re ttc.

@80sPadme 10dpo is still quite early to test isn’t it? Praying that’s what it is. It’s so disheartening seeing that negative though isn’t it?

@Monicatatie How are you? The Plan is going ok so far, I’m due to BD tomorrow though & hubby is working away so I’m just gonna jump on him tonight & hope for the best 🤣 I’ve got a festival to go to at the end of the month which is 3 days before my period is due so I’m gonna have to test 3 days early.

@Hopetobeamumof4 I’ve been thinking about you a lot, I know how hard it is to wait, seems like forever & of course you will be feeling anxious. My heart goes out to you. I’d say sore boobs is a good sign & like @Monicatatie says, it could just be that your pregnancy is different this time which is why you aren’t feeling sick. These coming days won’t be easy but you are closer to knowing, I have everything crossed for you. ❤️ Xx

So had a bit of a mad evening and decided to test again and could see 2 lines. So I braved a digi and.....
I'm seriously shocked! I didn't even peak on opk's this month.

@80sPadme 10dpo is still quite early to test isn’t it? Praying that’s what it is. It’s so disheartening seeing that negative though isn’t it

I don't think we even DTD much as I didn't peak on opk and we went on holiday so just had a bit of time to ourselves and relaxed. Well it seems it worked as this mornings BFN became this evenings BFP

Oh wow @80sPadme that's amazing news!!! Congratulations 🥳 so happy for you xx

@80sPadme No wayyyyyy!!!! Congratulations!! This is amazing news!! Let’s hope this is the start of a lot of good news this month!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@80sPadme have you had any symptoms? Interesting that you didn’t get your ovulation peak this month, there is hope for us all 😂 XX

@80sPadme - Congratulations - how wonderful to get such positive news literally at the start of the week! :) chuffed for you!

@Monicatatie - My older two are nearly 7 and 6 - they only have a 14 month gap between them so that I why I am so tempted to have a small gap between our latest little bean and maybe our future one....
I was shocked when my periods returned (less than 2 months PP) however, trying to take it as a good sign that my cycles are back on....however, who knows if I am ovulating! We really would like to have a summer baby if we have one more so the pressure if on for te next few months. I am stressing a bit about how I will manage the dreaded first trimester with a small baby and two fairly demanding littles....there's also the stress of making sure everything is healthy. We were unlucky at the start of last year and lost a baby at 16 weeks due to Edwards syndrome. I'm hoping that the same "bad luck" can't happen twice so am hopeful we will get one more healthly baby from my ovaries...

Thank all of you ladies for the warm welcome - I am really looking forward on going on this crazy ride one more time and sharing it with you all xoxo

[quote jellybean55]@80sPadme have you had any symptoms? Interesting that you didn’t get your ovulation peak this month, there is hope for us all 😂 XX[/quote]
Only symptoms were tiredness and my boobs are so sore and feel 'fuller'.
I put the tiredness down to being on holiday and it was only when my boobs felt so heavy and sore it made me think 🤔

I was wondering about the sore boobs. Mine aren't sore at all and they were definitely sore the last time I got pregnant. Cant remember with the first two though. When was period due @80spadme ? Mine is due Thursday but the fact that my boobs aren't sore at all makes me think I'm already out.

@jellybean55 how lovely to have a festival to look forward to at the end of the month! Let's hope the summer vibes brings us all some luck!

@msanne wow that's a short gap between your first two, very impressive! At least you've experienced it once so you know what it will be like. I also find it reassuring that you're ready to do it again because I'm kind of worried of juggling a two little ones. My last one is 10 month so if it happens for me, I could end up with two under 2. But I'm also 38 and telling myself it's now or never. I'm so sorry for your loss, must have been so sad. I'm sure the future has great things in store for you and your family 😊

@Monicatatie thank you - that's why I hope! But my mum was less than happy when I told her about our 3rd baby so I think she will totally flip out if I told her we were having one more! I'm an only child, so i've always wanted a big family but people get so judgy when you have more than 2 nowadays. I have been lucky to have some grandparents help in the past but am sure if we do have a fourth one we might be by ourselves!

It means signing away our life for the next 6 years again at least and we may be near 50 (gulp) by the time we get some independance back! I do love how noisy and happy my house is though (most of the time) and when you see your litttle people do well and grow into great kids - I have never been so proud.

Short term hardship for the long term happiness is what I am hoping!

Good luck for testing this week - you never know about symptoms....they are so different each time! Got everything crossed for you! xx

@msanne I'm totally the same. I expect my parents to have a real shock but they will get over it (I hope). I feel like a giant baby, still scared of my parents 🤣
In the grand scheme of things, 5 or 6 years doesnt seem that long and short term hardship for the long term happiness is spot on!
Im away on holiday and havent packed any tests. If I end up being late, I'll go buy some in a shop.

@Monicatatie

I was wondering about the sore boobs. Mine aren't sore at all and they were definitely sore the last time I got pregnant. Cant remember with the first two though. When was period due *@80spadme* ? Mine is due Thursday but the fact that my boobs aren't sore at all makes me think I'm already out.

@jellybean55 how lovely to have a festival to look forward to at the end of the month! Let's hope the summer vibes brings us all some luck!

@msanne wow that's a short gap between your first two, very impressive! At least you've experienced it once so you know what it will be like. I also find it reassuring that you're ready to do it again because I'm kind of worried of juggling a two little ones. My last one is 10 month so if it happens for me, I could end up with two under 2. But I'm also 38 and telling myself it's now or never. I'm so sorry for your loss, must have been so sad. I'm sure the future has great things in store for you and your family 😊

Period is due on weds according to FF app but who knows as my cycle is still quite variable from long term use of the depot injection

@Hopetobeamumof4 hey I stumbled across your thread in the early hours and just wanted to give you some reassurance. I've been through this agonising 2 week wait between scans a few times now. With a missed miscarriage last year my clearblue never went above 1-2 weeks so your 3+ is a great sign that hormone levels are rising. I then had an ectopic pregnancy which obviously showed no sac at all and then that leads me on to this pregnancy. Because of the previous ectopic I had to go for an early scan, I insisted they wait until I was 7 weeks by my dates. Went to the scan in Feb and they could only see a sac, I was devastated and convinced it was another MMC. Went back two weeks later and there baby was bouncing away with a lovely heartbeat measuring 8+2! My dates were totally off and my dating scan confirmed same. I would have been 6+2 at the first scan when all they seen was a sac. I am now 33 weeks and due next month. I am really hoping for the same outcome for you. Good luck today 💛

@Hopetobeamumof4 thinking of you today ❤

Keeping everything crossed for you @Hopetobeamumof4 xx

Good luck @hopetobeamumof4

Just seen your updates - congrats OP!

My second is 10 months this week and I'm 39 and suddenly finding myself wanting a third. It's bonkers - we can't afford it and I have crap high risk pregnancies. I doubt we will try again, but I can't help thinking about it a lot. Pretty sure it's my tired old body trying to convince me to go for it again before my eggs run out 😂

I'm out for this month 😞 af 2 days early, super short cycle but at least my theory was right. I'm quite disappointed because we did dtd quite a lot this cycle. Of well, good news is that we get to try again soon

@MrsTD88 thank you so much for taking the time to say that to me, I really appreciate it.

Sadly I had bad news today. The baby is still at 6 weeks and I’m more like 8 weeks so I’ve had a missed miscarriage. I’ve been referred to the epu so now need to make a decision on how I progress from here. Really sad and feel so guilty for my partner as well. I feel
Like I’ve made him so sad and it’s upset me so much x

@Hopetobeamumof4 oh I am so, so sorry to hear that. I've been thinking of you all day. Don't you ever feel guilty, you have done absolutely nothing wrong. He will be sad for your loss, not because of anything you have done. I have had two missed miscarriages, one last year and one in 2014. If you want to chat through your options with someone please feel free to ask me any questions you may have. I had medical management first time which ended up with surgical management and second time I had the MVA procedure. The Miscarriage Association is a good place to start if you are unsure. Feel free to private message me if you want lovely, if not take care of yourself and be kind to yourself 😘

I'm so sorry @Hopetobeamumof4 . Please dont feel guilty, you didnt do anything wrong and hopefully you will find support in people around you and that you love to get through this difficult phase. We're also here if you need to chat, rant or anything else xx sending you virtual hugs xx

So sorry @Hopetobeamumof4 - that is such sad news and I am gutted for you. Please don't think that you had any part in it - these horrendous things happen and we only are forced to acknowledge them when they happen to us. You must be strong and you can try again. Sending you a big virtual hug xoxo

@Monicatatie - sorry that AF has started for you. There will be next month and as you say - the fun is in the trying :)

Sorry I’ve been absent, just popped on to wish you luck @Hopetobeamumof4 then saw your post 😭

I’m so so sorry this has happened to you, my heart goes out to you. I know you will feel guilty but please try & shake that off, this is one of those things that is unfortunately common 😞

If you need to chat or rant please go ahead, it looks like there are a few of us here who have been through the same thing so you have good support. It’s just such a shit situation but you will get through this I promise. ❤️

@Monicatatie Sorry you’re out this month, on to the next month now 🤞

Hubby back last night so DTD,,gonna start opk’s tomorrow as I got my smiley on day 13 last month.